OiNK Comic Reviews

OiNK! #22: MAGiCAL MAYHEM

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This review was due on 21st February, click here to find out about the delay. More catch-ups to come this week.

After all our characters became so loved up in the Valentine’s issue it’s time for them to face adventure, danger, fantasy quests and newly discovered Egyptian tombs in back gardens in Timperley. The 22nd issue of OiNK is the Magic and Fantasy Issue and kicks off with a gorgeous Andy Roper cover that ties in (sort of) to the first episode of The Spectacles of Doom inside. Not only that though, but this is that staple of 80s and 90s UK comics, a wraparound cover poster. Have a look.

So how does it only sort of tie in with the strip? Well, that figure on the front is clearly modelled on main character Prince Endor but he’s actually the dimwitted hero of the tale, whereas above he’s portrayed as a vicious butcher, complete with apron and sausages wrapped around his neck. That’s certainly not who he is, so I’m not at all sure why he’s been drawn as the baddie here. Maybe it’s just an example of another 80s thing we all knew very well, the evil twin! Yes, that’ll do, I’ll go with that.

The strip itself is the first of a short two-part mini-series written by one of OiNK’s creators/editors Tony Husband and drawn by Andy. Taking a shot at the fantasy adventure movies of the 80s which all seemed to involve epic journeys across dangerous, impossibly-named lands with very specific ways of dying around every corner, Tony’s script is full of originality and wit. I particularly like the solution to crossing the Valley of a Million jokes.

The Spectacles of Doom proved popular and returned for a longer five-part serial later and then again in a spectacle-arly illustrated final episode in the second (and last) OiNK Book. Both of these would be in colour and were just as much a treat for the eyes as they were for the funny bone. You can see an example of the art from the annual story in the obituary for the late and very, very great Andy.

Under a Weedy Willy strip a few pages later in the comic the remainder of the page is seemingly filled up with a few advertisements. There are the usual ones for stamp collecting and practical jokes which I’m sure readers of basically any comic from the mid-80s will remember, but something stuck out about the one next to them, something created by Patrick Gallagher.

Oh, that tin can! I can still remember seeing that tin can for the first time. I’m sure it took all of five minutes to put together but I found it so funny as a kid that I haven’t forgotten it. It’s strange the things that left a lasting impression on us from this comic. Sometimes the simplest ideas really are the best.

There’s one line from a particular strip which has been quoted more often than any other

Over the past several years I’ve had the pleasure of chatting away with fellow pig pals across social media, sharing memories as we reminisce about our OiNK comic collections which were lost to house moves or decluttering parents over the years. Thinking about those conversations there’s one line from a particular strip which has been quoted more often than any other. That line is in the following Mr. Big Nose strip by the incredibly talented Jeremy Banx. I’m sure you’ll be able to work out which line it is.

Every now and again in a string of comments an OiNK fan will randomly proclaim, “And the dolphin’s name was Keith” and everyone will know exactly what they’re referring to. I do remember laughing hysterically at the caption when I first read it way back in 1986 and even now as an adult, knowing it’s coming, it elicits childish giggles in me every single time. I also love how Jeremy has drawn the dolphin! One of my very favourite strips from all of OiNK’s issues and a fan favourite with many others it would seem. A lovely little random gem.

Elsewhere in this issue Pete and his Pimple visits a witch who concocts a rather dodgy solution to his problem, then perhaps a relative of her’s in one-off strip The Magic Forest second-guesses her own recipe list, and Nigel and Skrat the Two-Headed Rat makes a surprise reappearance to con some magic fans into handing over their money so they can chow down on their favourite food stuff.

Pete and his Pimple by Lew Stringer
The Magic Forest written by Howard Osborn, drawn by Mike Green
Nigel & Skrat by Noel Ford

Now, back at school a few friends became obsessed with fantasy role-playing games, playing with nothing more than dice and their imagination. I always wondered how they kept track of everything and what stopped them from cheating, but a few years later the board game HeroQuest came along and I saw first-hand how it all worked, albeit with a game board and actual player pieces. (Actually, now that I’m thinking about it I remember the Space Crusade board game in the 90s and coming up with a version of that which utilised the Barcode Battler! Do you remember that thing? Whoa, sorry, that just came back to me.)

Anyway, it would appear OiNK decided to have a little stab at its own version of one of these games with The Sword of Blatterlee. Played over two pages, it all kicks off with a quick scenario containing more strange names and a map of the castle you’re going to raid (one room now more sinister than it would’ve been at the time). Below that are the instructions for playing with dice and they’re just as straight forward and as easy to follow as I remember when my friends were trying to describe their game in the playground. Then it’s on to page two and the conclusion of your quest, so enjoy.

Of course it all has to end with a good (bad?) old pun, doesn’t it? I feel a bit guilty setting you up for that. But just a little. I asked co-editor Patrick Gallagher who created this when I spotted a tiny little “AW” behind our hero character, the initials unfamiliar to me. He’s not sure who the artist was (possibly a junior artist from Cosgrove Hall) but he’s almost certain Mark Rodgers wrote it. With that pun right at the end I’d have to agree.

From spoofing the games we now move on to having a giggle at the fans themselves, all in an affectionate way of course and a strip I’m sure my friends would’ve appreciated and found just as funny. Dice Maniac was created by Lew Stringer and only appeared in two issues of OiNK, but both were winners. The name (specifically the logo as seen below in an image from Comic Vine) was a parody of a short-lived 2000AD spin-off comic which only ran for five issues and had already been cancelled by this time.

Lew’s take focussed more on the fans of the dice-based role-playing games and young Frodo Johnson (funny use of the fantasy and the mundane) has taken his obsession of rolling dice to battle beasts and find treasures and brought it into his real life. No decision is made without a roll and every person or thing he encounters, no matter how ordinary, is transformed by his imagination into a quest to be undertaken or an enemy to defeat. Of course, every time he decides to use the dice it ends in disaster, but he’s never phased and I love that about him. Such a shame he would only appear in one later edition.

A double dose of David Haldane now, beginning with a quick trip to Zootown. The best episodes of these mini-strips were always the ones where the animals were dressed as we would be, with jobs or personal events taken straight from the human world, but with their animal traits providing the laughs. This is the perfect example and another classic funny strip.

David’s other highlight is one of the best pages of the whole issue. Conan the Barbarian as played by Arnold Schwarzenegger had been a massive hit in 1982, but between then and OiNK’s creation its sequel and attempted spin-off Red Sonja both flopped at the box office. Spoof movie sequels were some of the very best one-off strips in OiNK and David’s take on the genre is no exception.

Perhaps due to the original’s success and Arnie’s role still very much being in the public consciousness (or maybe inspired by the unsuccessful sequels) David has created the origin story for his own muscle-bound fantasy hero, Konan the Accountant. Action, adventure, thrills, spills and a twist ending. What’s not to love?

That final panel is just brilliant. All of that build up, all of that gorgeous grey-shaded extravagances to the story, all brushed aside for a plainly drawn office job and the whole narrative completely forgotten about with one hilariously written caption. Brilliant stuff.

We’re almost done for another issue of the world’s greatest comic and one lovely treat awaits. As someone who is fascinated with Ancient Egypt, last Halloween (#13) Banx’s The Curse of the Mummy really was a special one for me. Now it’s the turn of OiNK’s superstar in residence, Frank Sidebottom (aka Chris Sievey) to bring us a page of Pharaohs, pyramids and ancient tombs, all in his unique style. There’s a lot to love here for me personally, but also simply in the fun and imagination on show.

Frank wearing a burial mask had me sold from the start, but also the way it’s laid out, the writing and the colouring reminds me so much of the homemade comics my best friend and I would’ve created for each other back in primary school. (He created School Busters and The Battle-Oids, mine were called The Real Smokebusters and War-Bots… I wonder what inspired us.) Frank’s pages were unlike anything you’d find in any other comic. Period. Perfect for OiNK. My particular favourite moment here is how the name King Maurice Karmen reads just like another random name until we find out his brother’s first name.

Classic.

“And the dolphin’s name was Keith.”

Mr. Big Nose (Jeremy Banx)

That just about wraps up our trip into dangerous lands, ancient curses and medieval quests. Next, OiNK comes bang up to date* with the All-Electric Issue on Monday 7th March 2022. So that gives you time to recharge, before you lead yourself back here to power through more of the same shockingly good humour.

*for the 80s

iSSUE 21 < > iSSUE 23

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Comic Reviews, Super Naturals

SUPER NATURALS #9: FiNAL FRiGHTS

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This review was due on 20th February, click here to find out about the delay. More catch-ups to come this week.

Alas, we come to the end of a superb run of comics. Editor Barrie Tomlinson’s Super Naturals has been such fun and, while there’s still a special to come, the fact this is the end of all the ongoing serials is a sad moment. Things kicks off for the final time with this intense image of the doll by Francesc Masi and I’ve some faint memory of seeing this cover at a few friends’ houses at the time. They all loved being scared by its story.

It’s not all an original, with the panel of David falling into the water taken from the strip instead. The image of the doll is one we haven’t seen before though. When you think about it, it’s a bold move to feature the non-licenced strip on the cover of a licenced toy comic. That beautiful bold logo aside there’s nothing associated with the Tonka toys on display. To me, this sums up the anthology feel of Super Naturals and its original approach to a licence title. But inside we start as always with one of the strips based on the toys, The Legend of the Super Naturals, drawn by Sandy James.

It all begins with the good guys dealing with the aftershocks of Skull‘s attack on the English village last issue. But instead of the drama of trying to save the town while being attacked by the terrified villagers, the Ghost Finder and its crew simply swoop in and Hooter casts a spell. Poof! All solved. It’s clear this Excalibur story was to continue for at least another issue or two before moving on, but needs must, what with this being the final edition, so shortcuts had to be taken.

Eagle-Eye‘s selflessness in instantly transferring himself into battle in a weakened state doesn’t have the tension it should’ve had because his friends once again swoop in on their flying vehicle to save him and quite easily defeat the evil Super Naturals, even though they’ve been pretty evenly matched with them since the outset. Meanwhile, Skull has gone ahead to the lake and summons King Arthur’s sword. It’s here we get some genuine comedic moments and an inkling of where the comic could’ve gone in the future.

I love the way the mythical Lady of the Lake just plays with Skull before giving him a cheeky bop across the head. It’s a funny, surprising moment and it could’ve opened the door to these characters interacting with mythical, magical legends from throughout our history. I mean, the Super Naturals themselves fit that description, so why not? But for now this is all we’d see of this potential.

The Legend of the Super Naturals has been gathering pace in recent weeks, becoming the best of the licenced material by far, which makes the final page here all the more frustrating. I know it couldn’t be helped, the plug had been pulled and they had to try and wrap it all up. My frustration and disappointment doesn’t lie with anyone working on the comic, rather with the fact the comic was cancelled in the first place, putting the creative team in this position.

Between Mr. Lucky telling us the evil ones have been thrown back through the Tomb of Doom and Spooks mentioning what happened with Excalibur, both occurring off-page, it’s all a bit of an anti-climax. Then we see Skull, trapped in our real world with the Bat Bopper, which in itself could’ve made for an interesting tale, their leader trapped here with no way back and no henchmen to assist him. I think this serial would’ve been written by Barrie himself since it’s the main story, and he’s done everything he could to give us as satisfying an ending as possible, which is to be commended.

Next up are the reader contribution pages and as per usual there’s a page of drawings followed by the Letter From Spooks letters pages. There’s a particularly good drawing of Thunder Bolt from reader Christopher Evans which deserved to be a lot bigger so I’ve zoomed right in to show you it. Then the letters pages opens with a sad note which I can remember bummed me out big time as a kid, even though I wasn’t a regular reader.

I’d been interested in the toys when I first saw the advertisements on the TV in the Autumn of 1987 and Santa did bring me a Ghostling (Scary Cat). But between seeing those adverts and Christmas itself Visionaries from Hasbro had grabbed my attention and so I concentrated on them that holiday season instead. I did buy the first two issues of Super Naturals and really enjoyed them, but my attention was being pulled elsewhere. However, in the shiny new year of 1988 my interest in Tonka’s toy line resurfaced. I knew the Visionaries line had been cancelled and when I saw all the cool looking figures and trucks on the back of Scary Cat’s packaging I wanted more!

I didn’t understand why it was finishing so soon. I just assumed comics kept on going

I reread the comics I had and loved them, so one day on the way to the dentist I picked up the latest issue. It’s funny the things we remember, isn’t it? I have this memory buried somewhere in my grey cells of being in the back of my late nanny’s car, with my mum in the front on our way back home. I was excited because these toys and comics were going to be my new fascination and the first story (above) completely rocked! I loved it! I was convinced I’d found my new obsession, so you can imagine how gutted I was when I read Spooks’ introduction.

I didn’t understand why it was finishing so soon. I just assumed comics kept on going. I was in a household where my brother read the Beano and Roy of the Rovers (another of Barrie’s titles) and OiNK was still going strong at this stage. The previous magazines I’d collected had been Story Teller partworks which had a pre-planned run, but comics weren’t supposed to end, definitely not after nine issues. I was really upset and within the space of ten minutes had gone from wanting to go to the toy shop to thinking there was no point, so I never did collect them.

This sad news is quickly followed up by this full-page advert for the Super Naturals Adventure Book as a way of perking up the readers and I’m sure for regular devotees it helped ease the pain. The thing is, as I now read through the rest of this issue nothing is jumping out at me with any form of recognition. It could be I simply don’t remember reading these stories, but I now wonder if I read them at all when I got home that day, knowing there were no more to come.

So while I did own this issue the rest of it feels brand new to these eyes. First up is the final Scary Cat Challenge. Genie is based on an idea sent in by reader Keith Scott and drawn by Alan Burrows (Beano, Red Dwarf, Transformers). It begins as we meet trespassing kid Jason Watkins just before he discovers an old lamp after falling through the roof of some buried Roman ruins. The genie that pops out is brilliantly snarky, a far cry from those we’d seen in movies up to this point (before Disney‘s Aladdin). Young Jason wishes himself out of the pit and is flown out by the magic of the genie. Awed by this, Jason starts to eye up what else he could wish for.

He sees some of the popular school kids nearby on their skateboards and wishes he had all the latest gear and the skills to match. Moments later he’s making new friends, whom he soon confides in by showing them the lamp. He begins to wish for treasure (“Getting greedy now are we?”, booms the Genie, knowing where this is headed) and then a palace with servants and everything. He demands his new friends kneel before him, and when they don’t he wishes for them to be thrown in the dungeon.

This the Genie does not obey and instead warns the boy that while no harm will come to the other kids, some harm will come to him if he carries on down this path. But Jason won’t listen, he knows the Genie must serve his every need. His final wish is to do something no human has ever done before, to travel at the speed of light. The genie all too happily grants this wish and we see Jason take to the sky, travelling faster and faster until his body starts to break apart! At this point the comic clarifies what has happened.

Just before his transformation into those zillions of particles is complete he screams one more wish to the Genie and it’s here we get our twist ending. Just as he’s about to disappear he wishes for everything to return to that moment before he found the lamp. It’s the last new wish he’ll ever make, because the genie places him back where we found him on that first page, unaware of what has happened and he stumbles upon the lamp all over again, thus beginning a never-ending cycle for all eternity.

So, initially I thought the strip would end with Jason alone and friendless. He’d be wealthy beyond imagination but would have learned the lesson that this can’t buy happiness. I should’ve known better than to guess where a strip in this comic was headed. Scary Cat herself returns to wish us harm instead of the usual request for more ideas, and that’s the final reader story we’ll see. Such a shame. I’m not aware of how detailed the original ideas were, or how much of each plot was taken from the readers or crafted by the writer, but it’d be interesting to find out. When reading these strips and seeing the letters and drawings sent in it’s clear Super Naturals had fired some great imaginations.

Since it’s the final issue and the last of Sandy James‘ posters I thought I’d better show it off to you and Snakebite is the star of the middle pages this time. We don’t get to see his full snake form but it does seem the comic has settled on how to consistently refer to each form a Super Natural can take and in which order. That’s a brilliant shield totem design too.

So here we are then, the moment a lot of readers of these reviews have been waiting for, it’s the final chapter of The Doll! Will we get an ending? Will it be a satisfying one? Will it be left open-ended even though with hindsight we know the strip would never return? It kicks off with Simon saving his foster dad’s life when he spots a caterpillar on his hospital drip, a doctor confirming it had been tampered with. A few minutes more and Frank would’ve been dead.

Leaving the hospital with his foster mum Louise, Simon demands to know the truth at last about their previous foster son, Alan. We’ve had hints of his story before but never all the details. Now we get to know all about the doll’s previous interference in their lives right before history is about to repeat itself. I’ll admit there’s a feeling of things needing to be tied up here, rather than this being the natural ending point, but it’s a necessary evil in this case and it’s carried off more successfully this time.

We finally get to see just how crazed Alan became under the doll’s control, a stage that young David hadn’t gotten to, at least until the final panel on this page. I do like the background of how the doll became a part of their lives. Alan’s dad was part of a travelling circus as a magical ventriloquist. (Obviously we know why he appeared to be so good at it.) But he died in a mysterious circus fire and when the doll is handed on to Alan the Marshal’s almost ended up dying the same way. This repeating of events is key here. It’s the doll’s whole M.O.

Clearly not expecting them back quite so soon, the doll is taken by surprise during it’s final acts of destruction at the home before, I would assume, he was to set it alight. He bursts out through the window, David apparently willingly going with him. Giving chase, Louise and Simon are horrified to see David running down to the lock where Alan had died. David falls in, in exactly the same place but the key difference here is Simon’s on hand and he dives straight in to save his brother.

We then get the obligatory family scenes of everyone together by Frank’s hospital bed. Everything is going to be okay again. A happy ending for all involved. Except, this is a children’s horror comic so we can’t just leave it at that, can we? Of course not. So the final two panels see the suitcase containing our murderous doll pop back up to the surface of the water down by the lock, an evil laugh emanating from within.

And that’s where the strip is left, forever.

I don’t think it was meant to end quite so quickly. If this had all happened a handful of issues later, would the doll have been picked up by someone else to terrify anew? Or would we have had a brand new strip in its place, with perhaps the chance of a return at a later point? We’ll never know. This last chapter does raise some questions, ones which unfortunately will go unanswered.

How far back did the doll’s murderous legacy begin? Was it hiding out in the basement waiting for another susceptible foster kid to turn up so it could take revenge out on the family? Why was the basement all sealed up tight by Frank? If he thought the doll would return why not just move home? Why did the doll make both Alan and David run for the lock? Was that simply its best means of escape since it had worked before? (Also, last issue we saw David fighting the doll’s grip but we never got a chance to see that elaborated on.) Don’t get me wrong, having so many unanswered questions isn’t a slight on the writing here, not at all. I’m positive these mysteries were laid out with full intentions of being answered later if not for the comic’s cancellation.

What we have ended up with is a 38-page children’s horror masterpiece (it began with five pages per issue but quickly became four) which deserves to be reprinted in its own graphic novel, perhaps with some of the better Scary Cat Challenge strips to make the page count up. It’s been full of suspense, some genuinely creepy moments even for this adult reader and plenty of thrills worthy of all the playground talk at the time. It was definitely a surprise for it to be part of a licensed toy comic, but let me reiterate from previous reviews, no, The Doll was not made for another publication and then shoved into Super Naturals. It had a perfectly timed Christmas episode, interactive elements for readers to send in suggestions and a conclusion in the final issue. I personally think it was a genius move to include this in Super Naturals, it hooked a few of my friends into buying (and reading) the whole comic who had no interest in the toys, for a start.

While The Doll was clearly brought to an earlier end than originally planned, it didn’t detract too much from the impact of its final chapter. Such a pity the same can’t be said of Ghostlings. I still love Anthony Williams‘ art but I’ve not been particularly enamoured with this story I have to say. The cliffhanger happening out of shot last time didn’t build confidence for the conclusion and I’m genuinely sad to say I was right.

To get things back to some form of status quo Weird Wolf is thrown off his clifftop perch and by complete coincidence the Tomb of Doom appears beneath him, doors open for him to fall into, even though that contradicts Spooks’ previous predicament of finding the tomb’s location before it disappeared. Then the huge battle of the beasts is discussed by Spooks and (the brilliantly drawn) Thunder Bolt and that’s pretty much it before they disappear through the Tomb too. There are one or two action panels but for all intents and purposes the story is basically concluded with a, “oh well, nothing we can do, let’s go home”.

“Open the coffin and release the dreaded curse of Britannicus that will destroy these British Islands!”

Skull

Let’s hope for more than this from our final strip, The Curse and the spooky Victorian setting is still oozing atmosphere thanks to artist Alan Langford, so its conclusion is off to a good start anyway. To speed things along the slightly harder edge Alan’s strips have had has been somewhat lost. Although things do start off excitedly enough with Skull and Burnheart looking likely to succeed in releasing the curse of Britannicus upon the UK.

The wall they came up against last time did indeed unleash a torrent of water, which both the good and bad vehicles barely escape. It’s all ready for an epic confrontation. They’ve been fighting over this ever since Christmas after all, but in the end one panel showing Lionheart and Eagle Eye bopping their evil counterparts is all the battle we’ll get. In the background, Spooks loads the coffin on to the Ghost Finder and Skull just admits defeat. He even tells his cronies to stop fighting and retreat.

Outside, the military have set up a line of defence against all of the Super Naturals. But hang on, weren’t their memories wiped by Eagle Eye back in #7? We’ll just assume it’s a different bunch of soldiers who witnessed the horrors in previous issues. The church within which Lionheart and his men have been valiantly fighting is levelled, giving Skull a chance to escape in the confusion. The story ends back in Ghostworld where the coffin now resides, unable to be used because no fighting or advantageous actions can be taken there.

Add in a corny 80s cartoon-style ending and it’s all over. Again, it had to be done. Things had to be wrapped up and concluded, what with the comic not merging into any other title and the upcoming Holiday Special was already complete so they couldn’t have continued there either. I wonder, if the story had been allowed to continue was there ever the intention to show us the Curse of Britannicus? As it stands, all that mystery and intrigue around the coffin in previous issues was for nought and it now feels more like a McGuffin for all the running about rather than anything substantial.

At least we got to see Alan’s superb depiction of Skull a few more times before we bid adieu. A temporary adieu, what with that Holiday Special still to come and the Adventure Book was on the shelves for anyone who hadn’t bought it yet. As I close over the final issue I have to say I’ll really miss my friendly fortnightly frights. It’s been a very different reading experience to anything else on the blog and a great example of a licence taken in an original direction. Quality-wise it really paid off.

For now, The Great News For All Readers is the Holiday Special review will be here from Thursday 26th March 2022.

ADVENTURE BOOK < > HOLiDAY SPECiAL

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OiNK Comic Promos

COMiNG UP: OiNK! #22

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With the ‘rona on its way out (thank you Mr. Vaccine) it’s time to get caught up with the comics I unfortunately had to set to one side while I rested up and recuperated. Very happy to be feeling well enough to write again and alongside catching up with Super Naturals #9, Jurassic Park #9 and Wildcat #10 comes #22 of OiNK, the Magic and Fantasy Special.

Promo drawn by Steve Gibson

When pig pals see the brilliant Andy Roper cover for this next one they’ll instantly remember one of the strips inside. A fantasy adventure strip by the name of The Spectacles of Doom, it’s a serial that would return a couple more times in OiNK’s run and became quite the fan favourite. It’s worth the price of admission alone (and at 30p it’s not like they were asking for much), so be here on Wednesday 2nd March 2022 for the full review.

(This issue also contains the most quoted line from OiNK by fans. It involves a dolphin and Mr. Big Nose…)

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Personal Post

iSOLATiNG iN THE STY: A COViD BLOG BREAK

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Hi everyone. So last week I started to get a tickly throat on Wednesday which I was able to clear with the occasional cough. No biggie. But by Thursday morning the cough was coming on all on its own and the throat felt like Jimmy ‘The Cleaver’ Smith had been tenderising it overnight. A quick lateral flow test later and…

It’s now Sunday and more comic reviews are due on the blog today and over the next two days, but I’ll be honest this thing is kicking my butt. I tried to write part of a review in advance two days ago (because I knew I wouldn’t be able to do it all at once), but two hours and only a few paragraphs later my head was busting and I was completely beat. So I’m taking the advice of so many blog readers who reached out to tell me to rest up and take a break.

I’m just nipping on to say normal blog service will resume once normal body and mind service has resumed (and to show you this very unflattering photo). I’m fully jabbed and boosted and don’t want to imagine how I’d be if I wasn’t. Take care of yourselves pig pals, let’s look out for each other, continue to be kind, and I’ll see you back here soon with lots of retro comics goodness.

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Comic Reviews, Wildcat

WiLDCAT #9: HiTCHCOCK iN SPACE

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While we’ve already seen Turbo Jones as a captive of The Great Ark, the latest Wildcat cover still gets the heart to pumping after last issue’s darker turn of events for the lead character. Now he’s going to be pulled in front of the living skulls and I’m excited to see what’s going to happen next. He was ordered to take the Arglons’ army and use his battle tactics against his friends and I don’t think these creatures are going to take no for an answer. But it looks like I’m going to have to wait just a little longer to find out because first up is James Tomlinson‘s Kitten Magee.

From the very first panel I’m somewhat captivated because the huge beast they’re up against appears to have a transparent stomach! Inside we see the skeletal remains of animals broken down by the acidic digestive juices swirling about. With Doc and Cassandra in either hand Kitten and the remainder of her team try to shock it into dropping them by firing near it, but this just angers the beast and next thing we know Aurora appears to have met her fate! I’ll admit when this happened I was shocked, I thought they’d killed her off! Until I turned the page that is.

You can’t get much more original action than dangling by a wire inside a monster’s stomach. Outside, the team are at a loss as to what to do, but in the end a bat-like creature they’d captured for Doc to examine breaks free and it seems it and the beast are natural enemies. With its teeth crushed after trying to chow down on Crud it attacks the beast’s neck with its claws while Crud bites at its feet, much to Kitten’s chastising. But it works and it falls over, unconscious.

The final page of this chapter begins with a bit of comic relief as we get Aurora’s speech balloon coming from within the giant jaws, which are locked tight. Not wishing to harm the animal now that they can escape, they lament not having any choice but to place small explosives on its teeth to free their friend. What imagination there is on show here. Wildcat has proven several times already how original it can be and if any one strip could be held aloft to prove that, it’d be this chapter of Kitten’s story. Straight after, artist José Ortiz treats us to this issue’s pin up of the manipulative Hobos, and despite his horrid appearance it’s still beautifully rendered in a different style than José’s previous posters.

From vicious monsters with see-through bellies back we go to killer vegetation, only this time there’s a giant slug for Joe Alien to deal with too. (Really, where else would you get this kind of fun? Writer David Robinson is another whose imagination knows no bounds.) Ron Smith‘s art truly excels here, like when the approaching trees suddenly stop and Joe starts to pick up words within his head, a telepathic message telling him their execution squad are on the way. There’s little to no hope left. Surrounded on all sides Joe tells his men they have no option but to try and fight their way out.

Suddenly all the trees start disappearing into the ground; one after the other they’re violently pulled down and then it starts to open up. Just when you think things couldn’t get any more out there after the Kitten story, up pops a ginormous slug-type creature, no eyes but all teeth. It moves about in a large circle before disappearing back down the hole, only for its heads to pop back up for a few seconds and then disappear again. Believing it to be a signal that it wants them to follow it, Joe leads his men down the slime covered sides of the giant hole.

I love the look of the slug, with its big mouth full of teeth, seemingly grinning at them. Has it just saved them from certain death? Is it really leading them to salvation? Or have they just gotten themselves into bigger problems? It’s not long before they lose their footing and slide all the way to the bottom, landing in a huge puddle of mucus, Joe’s brain dislodging as they do so. Again.

Yep, this is the cliffhanger. Where they find themselves would’ve been enough in my opinion. Leave the brain falling off until next time. It’s exciting enough and in fact having this happen yet again takes away from the originality and excitement of this episode somewhat. The ‘Next Issue’ page highlights this strip and it looks like the looney version of Joe has gone and flung himself into the slug’s mouth. There’s still no indication he’ll be eaten though, or that the slug is an enemy, so we’ll wait and see. Cliffhanger aside, it’s been a rollicking ride.

Loner‘s shrinking may have seemed like a silly idea to begin with in Barrie Tomlinson‘s story but on the very first page here we can see it’s suddenly being taken a lot more seriously, when the owner of the giant web he got tangled in comes home to feed. The opening image was shown as the Next Issue picture previously, so go and check that out if you’d like a sense of how things kick off for our mercenary friend.

He’s surely done for but at the last moment unlikely saviours appear in the shape of the two-headed ants he escaped from. They attack the giant (well, normal sized really) spider, climbing all over its body and chewing on its legs, eyes and basically anything else they can get their mandibles into. The spider isn’t going to let them interrupt dinner though and as you can see its doing its own fair share of killing, taking out three of the ants in this one gruesome panel alone.

This issue it’s basically a big monster movie, or rather a small person monster movie. Loner escapes from the webbing as the spider loses its grip, then kills one of the ants with Babe (his specially modified gun) before it can eat him too. Clearly, they aren’t the saviours after all, the spider was just in the way. They were still out for revenge after he killed one of their kind in #8. Escaping outside, Loner rests up on top of a flower for the night, before being rudely awakened by a benign animal simply eating breakfast.

After this he walks about wondering what to do and spots an even smaller insect than he. He takes comfort in this for a few seconds before it jumps in the air, lets out a shriek and wraps itself around his neck. To Be Continued. Loner is still my favourite character in the comic but his story is beginning to feel a little disjointed, like it doesn’t really know where to go next. I’ll be disappointed if it’s just going to be a series of bugs attacking him. The spider/ants had real potential but already they’ve been left behind and another random insect provides the cliffhanger. I’ll wait and see, but with some trepidation.

Moving on to our lead character and cover star now, Turbo Jones. As Robo arrives a carnival is starting in the city of the warrior Arglons. During this their enemies are sacrificed to their god by tossing them into a flaming pit and Turbo is in line for such an end if he doesn’t lead their almost-defeated army back against his friends, the Burroids. Below, you can see two Arglons leave their post, thinking the border guards are just overreacting. It’s nice that the characters painted somewhat as cartoony soldiers/henchmen of the Great Ark are being given individual personalities now. Although they are tossed in the pit later in the chapter for this.

Turbo is taken to the council where they demand his answer, Robo hidden in the background watching the proceedings. Turbo spots but ignores him, not wishing to give away his friend’s position. It’s all setting itself up to have Turbo agree to their demands and for Robo to think he’s turned traitor in a clichéd misunderstanding. But it takes a surprising turn when Turbo is told they have the Wildcat itself locked in their sights, ready to launch their troops and arrest all on board. So he lets them lead him to the council.

But seeing Robo shows him he has a chance to escape, so instead Turbo makes a run for it, hoping Robo has a way out. His treachery is the last straw and the Great Ark orders that the people of the Wildcat are no longer to be made prisoners of war, they are to be destroyed. Now this is how you do an exciting, shocking cliffhanger that still feels like a natural evolution of the story.

It should really go without saying by now how Vanyo brings the goods with Turbo every single time, but with last issue and this one they’ve done such an amazing job in altering the tone of their drawing to suit the darker elements of the story. I love how the Ark is a bigger part of the tale now and they feel like a real threat. It’s also a story that’s very organically shifted from one scenario to another. While the Loner strip has made quite a jarring transition, Turbo’s is telling different stories within the same scenario.

His strip is definitely my favourite here. Something I’ve noticed in reading the comic in real time is how my favourite shifts from issue-to-issue. From memory I thought Loner would always be the top strip but they’ve all taken their fair share of the accolade. This isn’t to take away from Loner of course, it’s just that the others have really excelled far beyond expectations, and my expectations were high. It’s a comic which continues to surprise every fortnight.

Chirpers is our Wildcat Complete this issue. Drawn by Jesús Redondo and it begins with a man feverishly writing at a (retro style) computer about things tapping at the walls, trying to get in. We begin by thinking it’s someone on board the Wildcat who has gone space crazy. This follows the revelation on the letters page that the Wildcat is only a quarter-of-a-mile long. I had always assumed it was much bigger than that, especially with some of the interiors we’ve seen. I thought this was far too small for nearly 1000 people but then I remembered Babylon 5 had a quarter-of-a-million people on board and was five miles long. So really, Wildcat is a bit roomy.

They strip skin and flesh down to the bone in seconds and the Wildcat death toll continues to rise once more

Once again the fact the exploration teams have been out of contact since they landed is brought up, but now the crew are doing something about it. They launch a fifth expedition team who land in an exotic jungle and of course they immediately lose their communications (due to the radiation storm centuries before). But it’s a paradise so they don’t care. They change into skimpier clothing and make friends with little friendly birds they nickname Chirpers.

That is, all except for one of the team. Grucker is busy taking soil and plant samples and the others ridicule him for taking things too seriously. They believe the Wildcat will realise what’s happened and send a rescue team down to pick them up and in the meantime they should treat it like a holiday. But Grucker is adamant they’re on a scientific research mission. For the others the only things that aren’t completely idyllic are the predatory birds that appear every now and again to feed on their cute little friends.

The group leader finally decides to help their little buddies out, against all of Grucker’s protestations. He’s right of course, they don’t know anything about the balance of nature here but it all falls on deaf ears. The predators look big and scary, their little bird pals are small and cute, so the decision is made. The results are disastrous. Very quickly over the next two weeks the skies fill with more and more of the Chirpers until suddenly they start to swarm and attack. Like a more vicious version of Hitchcock‘s The Birds, they strip skin and flesh down to the bone in seconds and the Wildcat death toll continues to rise once more.

So in the end it wasn’t a crazy old man going space crazy in the cramped conditions of the Wildcat, threatening to go to the ship’s ammunitions store and cause goodness knows what havoc. It was Grucker, the only sensible person in the entire team, trapped in their shed-like compound writing a diary for anyone who would find his body, knowing he was about to die. In fact the last panel is just his skeleton, with a few Chirpers happily sitting on top. It’s a rather grim ending and I love it.

Another issue under our belt and it’s been a belter. While three of the four serials concentrated more on action and were plot-lite, their originality and fun more than made up for that. Turbo and The Chirpers then brought a great, story-driven climax to the comic, so I’m really glad the running order was changed about again, with a double dose of great writing after all the action. It’s such a strong comic and it has a confidence in itself that would make you think it was going to run and run. We may be nearing the end of that run but there’s a lot still to enjoy.

The review of the tenth issue of Wildcat will be here from Friday 25th February 2022.

iSSUE EiGHT < > iSSUE TEN

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OiNK! #21: LOVELY COMEDY

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Let me think back to Valentine’s Day 1987.  Nope, nothing too embarrassing to think of, just posting a card through a girl’s door then running away, then worrying she wouldn’t see it, running back and ringing the doorbell before running away again, this time getting noticed by said girl as I made my escape. The next day in school was dreaded. At least I had the Valentine’s themed issue of OiNK to cheer me up and love was most certainly in the air, beginning with this Tony Husband cover depicting Horace (Ugly Face) Watkins and his beloved Mandy.

The cover was drawn by Tony and airbrushed by John Moorhouse, an artist on a tabloid at the time who had also worked on some of Tony’s Playboy cartoons.  Things are nice and rosy here on the cover for the couple but inside Mandy’s family were emigrating and taking her with them, leaving Horace alone in the hospital recovering after a recent BMX jousting accident. (It’s a long story.) Thankfully things are happier for other characters in this issue, such as those featured in an introduction to the power of love for the young target audience. Which features an alien attack. Naturally.

The Lesson of Love was written by Mark Rodgers who plays Bloonik in the strip and the young lady of the happy couple is Helen Jones, Mark’s partner in real life and future wife. Her character’s boyfriend is actually played by her brother Andy Jones and as for the other alien, well that would be none other than OiNK cartoonist extraordinaire Ian Jackson. This was the closest I got to seeing what he looked like until just last year! The strip is genuinely funny of course, but what I always found particularly hilarious in these photo stories was the imagination on show.

Ingenious and properly laugh-out-loud funny, imagine the fun they had putting it together

They spent next to no money on these and it always showed, with cheap sets, drawn-on special effects and in the case of this story a photograph of a toy spacecraft glued on. This was always the point, to spoof the cheap photo stories found in women’s magazines. The alien faces are paint or marker pen, with big rubber ears and some form of cut-out eye shapes, possibly egg cartons. Add some circles to their clothes and we have ourselves some silly aliens and their spacecraft interior set is the boiler in Mark’s house. Ingenious and properly laugh-out-loud funny, so I can only imagine the amount of fun they all had putting it together.

What kind of Valentine’s issue would it be without a tale of forbidden passion? Something possibly inspired by Romeo and Juliet. A love-conquers-all story. A happy-ever-after for two star-crossed lovers who just so happen to be a liver and a spleen. You know, real classic stuff. Obviously I could only be talking about a Burp strip and in this case Jeremy Banx outdoes himself with the surreal tale of two of the smelly alien’s internal organs and their undying feelings for one another.

There’s a lot to love here. I particularly like the throwaway lines such as Burp not even realising they knew each other, giving the impression of his body being full of sentient organs, each with their own set of friends and neighbours. I also burst out laughing with the mention of “dirty stop-outs”, a phrase my young, innocent self wouldn’t know the meaning of for quite a few years. A perfect example of how OiNK worked on many levels.

Very funny stuff indeed but what else would we expect from Jeremy? The lovebirds would also pop up again in a future issue. Next up is another way in which OiNK parodied the romantic stories found in stereotypical supermarket weeklies of the day. In years past on holiday with my other half at the time she’d bring a random selection of said magazines for when we were relaxing by the pool. I’d have a glance at them on occasion and always thought they were truly terrible.

“I thought it was indigestion, but now I realise that I am in love with you.”

Lord Wigfall

With their unbelievable romantic text stories, horrific “true” stories sold for a quick profit and umpteen celebrity ‘news’ (term used loosely) articles, I always thought how shallow and silly they were as I relaxed in the sun with my Marvel Secret Wars and Transformers. She thought they were silly too, but there was clearly a market for them. The far-fetched love stories would be aimed at the singletons in the readership with dreams of meeting the perfect partner (think Channel Five afternoon TV movies) and Patrick Gallagher decided he’d write his own version.

I recognise one or two of the facial features used in those photofit-like images. They also perfectly sum up those prose stories; an amalgamation of every reader’s ideal romance, mish-mashed into one truly unbelievable story. Think of how Bridget Jones fantasised about meeting the perfect man, how unrealistic her expectations of the world were because she read/watched stories like those. OiNK just took the ingredients and ran with them, taking it to the extreme.

As a child I remember sitting with my siblings and watching Charlie Brown and the Peanuts. It really wasn’t for me. Charlie himself grated on me. This was just my personal opinion of course, we’re all different and many adored him on the telly and in his original comic strip form. I did love Snoopy though and have heard wonderful things about his new Apple TV+ shows. However, this Peabrains strip below (also by Patrick) was much more entertaining to me as a kid than the original source material.

In fact, I think that last panel perfectly summed up how I felt about the cartoons back then, when I enjoyed everything about the Charlie Brown show except Charlie Brown. Of course, it wouldn’t be an OiNK spoof of a popular franchise without a dig at the merchandise. I remember the Disney watches, the Simpsons clock radios and the overpriced Thomas greetings cards of my own youth, all perfectly summed up here. Although I don’t think mine were quite so overpriced (it just felt like it to my parents).

There are a couple of smaller highlights that stood out this issue I wanted to share. The first is on the Grunts letters page (compiled by Patrick Gallagher) where the theme includes some fan mail for Mary Lighthouse (critic). However, one of these in particular caught my eye. Now I’m sure it’s just coincidence, after all the former TV presenter and tabloid journalist would’ve been 21 at the time, but it does sound like the kind of thing someone who complains about name changes in Beano would say, does it not? Then there’s the quiz, Are You A Fool For Love? and its rather to-the-point multiple choice options!

Turning over a page the comic suddenly breaks from its loved up contents to hit us with an urgent Butcher Watch update from Jeremy Banx. This semi-regular series of news bulletins warned readers about the country’s nastiest meat vendors and began in #8 while Uncle Pigg was on holiday. Then in #14 one of three featured faces belonged to a creation of Jeremy’s called Jimmy ‘The Cleaver’ Smith.

That was his first appearance but he immediately struck a chord with readers, who sent in pictures of him and updated fellow pig pals on where he’d been spotted. As OiNK continued he’d feature more and more; the Butcher Watch Updates would become more elaborate, evolving into full comic strips and he’d have the starring role, and he’d even go on to star in two serials in the weekly comic (in #45, its prequel in #55) and pop up on an iconic cover. Here marks the first occasion Jeremy singled him out.

Remembering back to my original time with OiNK, it felt like Jimmy was always there, lurking about. We’d never know when he’d make a sudden appearance. Reading through OiNK now, it’s interesting to see he was just another random butcher before the readers took to him, their feedback bringing him to the fore. Jeremy then made sure that craggy face would return to haunt us again and again in some genuinely creepy moments, some that really surprised me!

Back in #6 the excellent Watery Down was a big, two-page build up to one great joke. I’m very happy to say Tony Husband has written a strip for this issue which takes over two pages with a similar idea. This time the subject of the parody is Emily Brontë‘s classic 1847 novel Wuthering Heights. (How often can you get to mention that in a review of a children’s comic?) Even if you have only a passing bit of knowledge about the book or the movies, you’ll recognise the scene which inspired Tony here. If you don’t know a thing about Catherine and Heathcliff don’t worry, it’s still a wonderfully random piece of silliness.

The sheer daftness of this made it an instant fan favourite, with many OiNK readers remembering it decades later, either from this issue or when it was reprinted in the Winter Special a few years later. Chas Sinclair brings a perfect spoof style to Wuthering Heights’ famous scenes. So when it ends with something completely unrelated and out of left field like this, it’s just perfect, brilliant nonsense.

We’ve reached the back page of another issue and I’m very happy to see another full-page, wordless Ian Jackson strip just like we had in #14. Put these side-by-side with my favourite page from all of OiNK’s run in #4, and just imagine if every issue had finished with a full colour masterpiece from Ian such as these. This particular entry, Stupid Cupids is actually made up of two individual three-panel strips, each read vertically down the page and written by Mark Rodgers and Tony Husband. As always, take your time with Ian’s artwork and savour each panel as you make your way along, because each one is a complete joy.

That’s almost it for this romantic issue of our piggy pink publication but the magic continues in two weeks, quite literally. The 22nd edition is the Magic and Fantasy Special and contains the first appearance of a certain bespectacled hero in a new mini-series. A real favourite of mine and many others, it’s not to be missed. You can check out what it is from Monday 21st February 2022.

But before you go I just have to let all you lovely blog readers know how I really feel, to thank you for your continued support. Take it away, Marc Riley‘s Doctor Mooney, He’s Completely Looney.

iSSUE 20 < > iSSUE 22

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Comic Reviews, Super Naturals

SUPER NATURALS #8: ESCALATiNG ECTOPLASM

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The Ghostlings strip makes the cover of the latest Super Naturals as Spooks faces up against the monsters of Earth in the far future. Anthony Williams is the cover artist for the first time and it may not look like it but the story itself remains the lighter, more comedic of the comic inside. It’s also the first cover to directly relate to a chapter of a strip. Previously they’ve been general images of characters or scenarios to lure fans in, and #6 was a collage of panels from the Scary Cat story. I can understand why early issues of a new comic, especially a licenced one, would have more generalised covers so maybe this one was a sign of things to come.

Although things weren’t to come. We’ll get to that a little further down the review but first up let’s get stuck into the continuing Legend of the Super Naturals which has technically been ongoing since #1, although it did sort of start a new story within itself in #6 when they made their way to the Cornish coast. As Skull and his team get ever closer to the location of Excalibur, the good Super Naturals are split in two, beginning with leader Lionheart and Thunderbolt making quite the entrance.

Accidentally scaring some local farmers away, the weakened heroes hop aboard their abandoned tractor to give very slow pursuit in a small moment of comic relief. The next page on from this takes us across the breadth of the entire story and you can see it below. It begins with the tractor pootling along before we catch up with those upon the Bat-Bopper. I wonder if these acts of violence towards Skull’s underlings would’ve developed into a plot point further down the line. While the good guys see their Ghostlings as helpers, it’s clear their counterparts view them as slaves, only to do their bidding.

They come across a local village and just for the sake of spreading fear they tear it apart with flames and missiles, basically for their own amusement. We also catch up with the team on the Ghost Finder who have stopped off on another small rock outcrop in the middle of the ocean to let their vehicle recharge itself, just like I assumed they would’ve had to do. I’m glad to see this wasn’t overlooked for the sake of expediency.

Eagle Eye senses some unknown mineral beneath the surface and a quick missile blast later Hooter is getting to work with his little-used alchemy abilities to turn it into a useable fuel. Once on their way for the final part of their journey Eagle Eye says he’ll fly solo alongside them. But really, he just wants to use his own powers of instant transference (which the others used to their detriment last time) and doesn’t want to be talked out of it. As Spooks wishes “Feathers” well the cliffhanger has us back at the destroyed village, Lionheart and Thunder Bolt looking on, desperate to help but unsure how they won’t just make it worse!

There’s certainly a lot happening this issue. However, none of it is rushed and it’s become the best of the licenced strips by far, with multiple points of view all playing out independently from each other. It feels like a much meatier read than five pages would normally contain and in fact I had to go back and check there weren’t any extra pages added to the tale. The writer (most likely editor Barrie Tomlinson) has an expert hand on these characters now and having Sandy James as the artist is the perfect choice. After all, he developed the comic versions of the toys in the first place. I’m looking forward to seeing how all these elements come together for a surprise finale.

The Ghostlings strip is beginning to feel like it’s running out of steam story-wise, but artist Anthony Williams certainly seems to be having a blast. His designs for the dinosaur-like Surface-Stampers and the giant insects the Crevice-Crawlers are great fun, as is his interpretation of Eagle Eye who makes a surprise appearance here, big heroic chin and all. Back in Ghost World, the all-knowing being Specter may not care about sides, but it would appear he can be coaxed (or tricked) into giving away a location and the door to get there.

Weird Wolf is quite angry none of his teammates came to rescue him so he turns into his animal form and howls, summoning the beasts above, which in turn attracts the Crawlers who see the stampede as dinner on the go. It’s all rather inconsequential after the interesting story we’ve been treated to so far and unfortunately the ending is worse. It’s just annoying. It happens off to the side, with Spooks simply describing what’s happening.

This feels like a cheat to shoehorn in a cliffhanger. Without showing the apparent danger it feels cheap, like a lazy last-minute way to attempt a dramatic ending without putting the effort into writing or drawing it. It’s such a shame because it’s been a good story until now, and Anthony’s art was saving this episode somewhat until this. I do wish Anthony had been enlisted to draw a full Super Naturals strip though, I’d loved to have seen his versions of the other main characters.

After not actually showing himself in last issue’s chapter (but having his presence very much felt) The Doll is about to make up for lost time. Simon Wickham appears to be trapped in the caterpillar-laden basement, the stairs have collapsed and the doll is closing in, axe in hand. Swing after swing almost connects before the ventriloquist’s dummy throws it at him in frustration and it sticks in the wall. Using it as a step up, Simon leaps for the door and escapes in a very exciting sequence I’m sure had child readers thrilled.

Artist Francesc Masi seems to relish being able to finally draw more of the murderous toy. Its expressions would’ve been terrifying for the target audience and his relentlessness in trying to kill Simon, who the readers would’ve been able to identify with, is quite severe. It’s clear by now the doll isn’t out to make mischief or harm, he’s a killer! This is confirmed by Simon’s foster mum, Louise.

When Simon discovers a broken ventilation cover leading to the basement he realises the doll has been able to come and go undetected. Louise, knowing David is on his way to visit Uncle Frank in hospital and that he left with a suitcase big enough to house the doll, rushes them both there in the car. On the way she comes clean and finally admits, to herself as much as to Simon, her previous foster child Alan was killed. It was no accident and it’s now clear to her the doll, now on its way to her comatose husband, was responsible.

There’s a blink-and-you’ll-miss-it moment here which may be a hint of what’s to come in the finale. Look at David’s face while the monster that’s possessed him is beating Frank. Is he starting to break through the spell? The strip ends with him leaving, suitcase in hand, just as the others arrive and Simon tentatively opens the door to Frank’s hospital room, now in darkness. I’ve loved this chapter and it’s definitely building to a climax. Of course I only know this with the gift of hindsight but it makes for a breathless episode and I’m excited to see the next issue.

However, I can’t help but be a tiny bit concerned about the amount there still is to wrap up in just four pages. We’ve the mystery of Alan, David’s possession, the outcome of the attack on Frank and hopefully the defeat of the doll itself. I have faith in this comic though. Let’s just hope it’s not left too open-ended as a result. I want a nice, satisfying end to the doll’s murderous rampages!

It’s hardly a sign of a comic series about to be cancelled

Eagle-eyed (no pun intended) readers may have spotted something was missing on the letters and drawings pages, the end of The Doll and the final panel of the Scary Cat Challenge strip. Namely, the address for the comic. Clearly its fate was known in advance (unlike Ring Raiders) and it would’ve been unfair to ask the young readers to send in more contributions when they would only have been received after the final issue had gone to the printers. But on Spooks’ letters page there’s an advertisement which gives a different sense of how the title was performing.

On the same day as this issue went on sale, the Super Naturals Adventure Book was also released. A thick, glossy publication along the lines of the OiNK and Wildcat Winter Specials and most likely timed to entice all the new toy owners from Christmas to buy it (and through it discover the comic). It’s hardly a sign of a comic series about to be cancelled. Obviously it would’ve been created a long time before this point when hopes for Super Naturals were high but still, I can imagine the shock of readers who picked it up only for the next regular issue to announce it was the end!

Speaking of readers, let’s have a quick look at a couple of contributions to Spooks’ letters pages. I really like this Tom Williams drawing of George Michael as a Ghostling, created to beat the evil Weird Wolf‘s terrible singing. Reading this today and seeing him as a ghost has a different feeling to it, but as a fan I like the idea of him protecting us mortals with his music. Also, Mr. Lucky grants a reader’s wish in a moment which reminds me this is very much a Barrie Tomlinson comic.

The Scary Cat Challenge this issue is based on an idea sent in by reader Jonathan Williams of Liverpool. It takes place in India where Professor Ronald Barton is in his element, enjoying the culture and people and paying his respects to the history of the country. His ungrateful son Julian however doesn’t even want to go. When they get there he’s foul to every local, intolerant to the ways of the people, their way of life, food and language and even thinks the Taj Mahal is nothing compared to Wembley Stadium! He reminds me very much of a certain kind of British tourist we all know too well from holidaying abroad.

Julian ends up insulting many of the locals. One particular temple guide doesn’t take kindly to one of his comments. Standing in front of a golden statue depicting The Snakes of Panatha Julian scoffs at the prophecy, that “one day the golden snakes of Panatha will reincarnate”. The guide asks Julian to respect their ways but is instead verbally abused. Apologising on his behalf, his father the Professor tries to reason with Julian but his son is just as rude to him. By this stage I felt myself becoming frustrated with the character, which is the whole point. We can also see where this story is going when he returns to his hotel room to find a smaller version of the same statue as part of the decor.

He throws a blanket over it and climbs into bed to read a football magazine he brought from home to “get away from a load of old mumbo-jumbo”. We see the blanket move and golden snakes appear, one after the other, accompanied by the eerie caption, “A moving snake makes no noise”. Screaming in fright, Julian ends up entangled among them and we suddenly find the story jumping forward to the next morning and a local doctor is examining him.

While the comic doesn’t go so far as to scare a kid to death this time (see #6), the outcome could actually be worse for this particular brat. The final page shows his body stiff but still breathing, his heart racing but no movement or reactions whatsoever. He’s been frozen in fear, possibly for the rest of his life. These final panels showing Julian’s facial expression are the creepiest of the whole story, but add these to the moments of the snakes surrounding his bed and that silent panel in particular (first panel in the second picture above) and Julio Vivas once again captures the potentially scary moments perfectly. I’m sure young fans would’ve loved his work.

After a brief Ghostling Tale involving a fairground ghost train we move on to our final strip which as per usual is The Curse, drawn by Alan Langford. In the tombs under the Thames Skull, Burnheart and Scary Cat have discovered where Britannicus lies and are attempting to open his casket to release his curse upon the world. Knowing they’re late to the party, Lionheart and Eagle-Eye take up arms against Burnheart outside and we finally get some Super Natural-on-Super Natural fight scenes. Don’t get me wrong, the story has been intriguing and I’ve been eager to see what this Britannicus fella is all about, but Alan did such an amazing job of the fight scenes in his previous story I’ve been looking forward to their next clash.

There are spells and flames and swords and guns aplenty but the setting just can’t relive that epic feeling from the previous story. However, it’s still fun and as always we have to remember the original audience. Eventually, as the good guys recover from a spell cast by Scary Cat, she and Burnheart race inside to recharge the flame gun and finally free Britannicus’ body. But it appears the Romans knew it could be of value to evil and so they sealed it within a further casing, this time made of brass. Knowing it’ll take longer to break into this, Skull and his cronies retreat through the underground sewers until they reach a dead end.

The final panel halts the action as the Bat Bopper unleashes one of its flying bombs and the ‘Next Issue’ panel simply states, “The Flood!” so I think we can guess what’s on the other side of that dead end. It’s a much lighter episode this time compared to the atmosphere-rich story we’ve had thus far. There are also more examples of using Skull for comedy which I found humorous last time because it hadn’t been done before, but now I feel it’s taking away from that gloriously scary leader Alan is so good at portraying.

Nevertheless, knowing the final chapter is upon us I’m still looking forward to seeing how this one is resolved, even if it’s now looking very unlikely we’ll get to see what Britannicus looks like or what his curse entailed.

It’s sad to think there’s only one more issue of the regular comic to go, but I’m excited by the Adventure Book, which as I explained above also went on sale on this day back in 1988. So I’ll be spending time this week reading that for the full review in seven days, to fill the gap between the penultimate and climactic issues of Super Naturals. So come back to check that out on Sunday 13th February 2022 and then the following Sunday 20th February for the finale.

iSSUE SEVEN < > ADVENTURE BOOK

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COMiNG UP: OiNK! #21

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It’s almost that time of the year again. A time when couples get to spend a romantic weekend away without the kids, or go out for a lovely dinner at a posh restaurant, or spend a night in with a candlelit home-cooked meal. A time for single people to complain that it’s all too commercial, make comments about how true love should be celebrated all year long and not just for one day, or joke about how they’re saving lots of money. (Then the next year they’re with someone and booking that trip away.) I’m of course talking about St. Valentine’s Day.

This Next Issue promo is written by Mark Rodgers and Ian Jackson and there’s a lot to love already. From Mary Lighthouse (critic) arriving with a spiked club to complain about violence, to the gift passed on by Uncle Pigg. You can be sure there’ll be plenty more to laugh at and more for Mary to moan about in #21, the full review of which will be right here on the blog tomorrow, Monday 7th February 2022.

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Comic Reviews, Wildcat

WiLDCAT #8: THE MORE THiNGS CHANGE…

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Ron Smith kicks off this issue of Wildcat with tthis fun Joe Alien cover and I have no idea what’s going on here. Joe’s story has centred around killer plants but it appears there’s more to the region he’s found himself in. I’ll get to that below. Inside, everyone has shifted back to their original places after editor Barrie Tomlinson shook things up a bit for a couple of issues, so first up is Turbo Jones and we pick up the story with the Arglon leaders having captured him and demanding he lead their army to victory against his friends.

I have to say this issue’s Turbo chapter is by far the best yet, taking a somewhat dark turn which I love. It contains some genuine shocks and a very surprising turn of events for one set of evil characters. Robo also really comes to the fore. As the Arglons believe Turbo has defected they assume Robo is a traitor too and capture him. Their leader The Brain demands he tell them where Turbo is (Robo doesn’t know, he had a system shutdown during the whole debacle) and he’s taken away to be tortured.

For a comic marketed towards a younger demographic than Fleetway‘s other action titles this is really quite dark. Transformers got away with quite severe violence because the characters were robots. Along the same lines, here we see Robo being tortured in very specific ways relating to his robotic parts. Even so, it’s quite heart-wrenching because Robo has been such a loveable character so far. The final panel, when they callously suggest throwing his apparently dead body on the rubbish heap is the darkest the whole comic has got so far, which is a shock to read in the usually safe, action-orientated Turbo Jones story.

I love it!

In the end Robo’s back-up battery was overlooked and he’s able to use it to recharge himself and get back on his feet. He commandeers one of the flying dinosaurs and takes off to find Turbo after overhearing some Arglons saying he’d defected to the other side. He knows it isn’t true and heads off to find out what’s going on. As we check in on Turbo we find him tied up in a prison cell and we get something of a revelation about the grand council and The Great Ark!

Up to this point we’ve only seen the council behind their lofty pulpits, armour shoulder plating giving the impression they had full skeletal bodies. The mechanics inside their mouths hinted they were more than just decomposing bodies. I’d thought maybe they weren’t alive, that they were controlled by someone else behind the scenes but it appears I couldn’t have been more wrong. Suddenly we see one confronting Turbo and they’re just a skull and spine, yet appear to be alive! This is a much creepier revelation. They’re even the star of the pin-up. What a fantastic chapter in this story and a brilliant start to this issue.

Ron Smith‘s cover star Joe Alien is up next and his five pages are taken up with his team’s escape from their predicament last time and not much else. But that’s okay. Every issue of Wildcat is perfectly balanced. Each of the four serials can have chapters which are more character focussed, or which develop the plot or further mysteries in the overall story, or concentrate on some action instead. This means we’re guaranteed to get at least one example of these elements across each issue, bringing depth to the action every fortnight.

Written by David Robinson, as the trees tighten their grip on Joe and encircle his men, he uses his extendable limbs to reach through the thorns and grab one of the lasers, killing the plant that has him captive. We then get this amusing panel (below left) showing him helping his men to escape, before they spot commotion in the distance where a giant caterpillar is being attacked by the trees. They pick it up and throw it to the side as they chase down the landing party, but then Joe has an idea. Still a few miles from their shuttle craft they climb on board the giant insect and throughout this increasingly dangerous situation Joe can’t help but be enthralled by it all.

In the end the caterpillar starts to chew down on the attacking trees and the team take their leave, now that much closer to their landing site. But when they get there the shuttle is missing. Of course it is! Escaping death from plant life, a crazy human god and riding atop a giant caterpillar obviously wasn’t enough. The story continues next issue, but for now this was a fun diversion and the perfect accompaniment to the darker Turbo story.

Kitten Magee and her team are still being led by Hobos in writer James Tomlinson‘s latest chapter, but surely what happens this time will finally make them realise what’s really going on. Leading them to a cave where he claims they can take shelter from the dangerous animals in the swamp, they find the ground covered in bones, stripped bare by some savage beast. Hobos claims the creature was killed long ago and the team just accepts that! However, Doc takes a closer look at a skull as the others gather wood and thinks to herself it couldn’t have been there for more than a few days. She doesn’t get to air her suspicions before things kick off.

The rest of the team follow, lasers ready and are attacked by a swarm of bats which are easily fended off before the creature reveals itself in the final panel. Thing is, the cliffhanger image was already used as the Next Issue promo last time, so the big reveal isn’t new. This is a bit disappointing because the whole strip has been leading to something monstrous by artist José Ortiz but we’ve already seen it. However, what I did really enjoy was Crud, Kitten’s little robotic pet. After being absent in the previous chapter for some reason he’s really making up for it here as a true member of the team. As you can see above and below he even gets some genuinely funny comedy moments.

A whole new chapter in Barrie Tomlinson’s Loner‘s adventure begins and it takes a turn for the truly bizarre. Finally leaving the underground world he’s been trapped in since the first issue, he finds himself in the jungle, still unable to contact the Wildcat. Frustrated, he goes to kick what looks like a random round object on the ground but it squeals in pain, floats up into the air, expands and surrounds Loner, trapping him inside what looks like a giant jelly. Still able to breathe, he tries to reason with whatever this creature is and apologise. At this point something happens that I have no recollection of reading as a kid.

That shrinking panel is expertly drawn by David Pugh and while we don’t get to find out anything about the strange transforming blob as it floats off leaving our hero stranded, there’s a wonderful sense of scale to the final panel on this page. Indeed, in the hands of another artist this might have come across as a somewhat silly outcome for the strip which was, up to this point, the most serious. But instead of roaming into 60s Doctor Who or Land of the Giants territory, David’s art adds a real feeling of isolation and danger.

It reminds me of a certain film though, especially when Loner comes up against this two-headed ant below. But such is the forward-thinking nature of Wildcat, Honey I Shrunk the Kids wasn’t even released until later the same year. Of course, other previous small-people-in-giant-surroundings will have had similar battles before, but for the target audience this was most likely their first such experience.

As an adult it’s initially a bit of a shift for the Loner strip but nevertheless it’s a fun outing with some great imagery of the world around him. But it appears the fun will soon be taking a decidedly darker tone, back to more of what we had before. Suddenly surround by three giant ants who have just watched Loner kill their buddy, he tries to make a run for it and ends up caught in a huge spider’s web. But it’s the Next Issue page that really shows us where we’re headed.

Now that’s a monster and a suitable foe for my favourite character! I feel like we’ve been misdirected into believing the strip was taking a lighter approach, only for us to be hit with this image. What a bluff! What an issue the next one is going to be too, what with the Turbo strip’s revelations and tone and then this to look forward to now. But we’re not quite finished with issue eight yet. The Wildcat Complete tale has a strong message and, while it’s a coincidence, a question on the letters page sets it up for us.

Kathleen probably wrote in while reading those first few issues. As I said at the time, the comic started off with some brilliant misdirection. (Wildcat was good at this.) As the stories developed, what Kathleen had witnessed would be turned on its head, teaching us all not to judge a creature (or indeed anyone) by their looks alone. Aliens advertised as hideous monsters became allies, scary ones were shown to be simply defending themselves, and often humans were the worst culprits of the horrors to be found in deep space, especially in the anthology stories. This issue is no exception.

Just when you think the human race can’t disappoint us any further

Gliz, drawn by Joan Boix, tells the tale of an alien worker on board the Wildcat. With a lizard-like face and two extra arms resembling tentacles he’s the butt of constant jokes from his small-minded work colleagues in the scientific research department, where he works as a cleaner. You’d think scientists would know better. Their constant bullying, just because he’s different, makes him uncontrollably nervous and this results in him being rather accident prone. Of course, when accidents happen the humans only see these as proof that they were right, even though it’s their fault.

He’s a sympathetic character and lovable straight away. His wish to make friends, to fit in with the humans and be the best he can be is endearing. Only one human by the name of Grenzel gives him the chance to be himself and open up about the treatment he receives. But Grenzel’s mother doesn’t take kindly to her son mingling with an alien and in a rather shocking scene punches her son to teach him a bigoted, racist lesson. No pun intended, but it’s quite the hard-hitting start to a story in a children’s comic and I like how it doesn’t hold back. His mum threatens him with a beating from his father and as a result Grenzel ignores Gliz the next day at work.

Depressed more than ever, Gliz jumps at the chance to show his abilities on a dangerous mission to one of the planet’s moons after the pilot becomes ill and Gliz is the only one left who knows how to fly the shuttle. Once there, the crew are set upon by space pirates and the humans immediately try to use Gliz as a bargaining tool! The pirates crash-landed and need to get off the moon but, upon finding out only Gliz can fly, the humans’ cowardly plan backfires. Deemed unnecessary, they’re all killed.

On the final page Gliz realises the pirates are going to hijack the Wildcat and kill everyone on board. Setting the controls to self-destruct he consoles himself that at least he’ll die a hero and be redeemed in the eyes of the people he just wanted to be close to. But just when you think the human race couldn’t disappoint us any further the story finishes on this note below.

It’s a real downer to end the issue on and I salute Barrie and his team in doing so. Unfortunately it’s a tale that could be told today and still be just as relevant. Today, we’d probably have the ancient ancestors of those scientists attacking the comic on Twitter for it, but that would just prove its point. It’s a powerful end to what has been a surprising issue of this fantastic comic. But surely questions would have to be asked of Turbo’s selection process. Several hundred of our best and brightest and these xenophobes still get to partake in taking humans to the stars?

Darker stories, surprising twists, fun adventures and a message I can really get behind. I’d say this has been the best issue of Wildcat yet. How can it improve on this? All I know is I’m sure it’ll manage to. Somehow. We’ll find out when the next review hits the blog on Friday 11th February 2022.

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Comic Reviews, Jurassic Park

JURASSiC PARK #8: PURE ESCAPiSM

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A simple cover of an iconic movie scene by Dave Cockrum welcomes us to #8 of Dark Horse International‘s Jurassic Park. The cover is from the first issue of the American movie adaptation so really shouldn’t make sense here, after all the Velociraptors are no longer caged up, but it reminded us of the danger from the film that was now running loose. Inside we’ve less adverts and more comics, making for a very satisfying read this month and the title strip no longer has the least amount of pages.

The well chosen cliffhanger last month saw the original US strip cut out at the point Dr Alan Grant and Dr Ellie Satler‘s theories were proven terrifyingly correct. Now they and new character, big game hunter George Lawala are faced with a fully grown mother raptor and her juvenile offspring and she isn’t happy. Grant pushes some boulders, causing a chain reaction, giving them just enough time to make their escape, but it isn’t long until she’s out and chasing Lawala.

Here we get a few action pages of a chase on the beach, ending with the raptor being shot. Lawala muses over the fact the injured animal isn’t what his employer wanted so he shoots it again to kill it. Surprised there are actual dinosaurs here, that it wasn’t some case of mistaken identity he lets his concentration slip, not realising she isn’t quite dead yet and with her dying breath she snaps her jaws around his ankles. He’s able to squeeze himself free and limps off in search of the others.

It’s hard to believe this is the same artistic team (penciller Armando Gil, inker Dell Barras and colourist Renée Witterstaetter) as those thrilling first few pages back in #6. This feels rushed by comparison and overly simplistic. To be fair this is only a problem for a few pages, but they’re the ones involving what should be the highlight of any chapter in a Jurassic Park comic strip, a dinosaur attack! It all feels rather muted as a result.

“He’s got us and the raptors! He’s won!”

Dr. Ellie Satler

Things pick back up again as we rush towards the end of the first chapter to our sequel story. Our heroes are captured by Lawala who had waited near the cave, knowing they’d return to make sure the dinosaurs were okay. Just as with the movies, while the Velociraptors are dangerous, it’s also important to protect them from the dangers of humans. A fight ensues and of course Alan and Ellie are outmatched, although they do give a valiant effort. Alan tries in vain to convince Lawala he must realise the animals can’t be taken off the island, that what happened to the park could happen to the world. But Lawala readily admits he’s too greedy to care.

Beaten unconscious, Ellie and Alan eventually wake to find themselves in a somewhat impossible position, just right for an almighty cliffhanger with suitably dramatic lettering by John Costanza. Although, it does unintentionally raise a few chuckles because it reminds me of the ending to Finding Nemo, which of course came much later. This story by Steve Englehart reminds me very much of where the Jurassic World trilogy has been heading. I’m writing this before the third movie (sixth in the overall series) is released, the previous movie having ended with dinosaurs out in the world among us. I’m really excited for that film and I think that’s the same excitement I had when I first read this back in 1994.

“The world swarms with the living evidence of a billion years of evolution!” Thus begins the next chapter in the ongoing Xenozoic Tales saga, the first of our two dino-themed backup strips. The story here (as ever written and drawn by Mark Schultz) is the classic sci-fi scenario of losing contact with a research outpost and going in to find out what’s wrong. We know it’s clearly going to be bad news but that’s not the point of the story, it’s all about what has gone wrong and exploring a little more of this strange new world, its dangers and having some action and excitement along the way.

The first thing I noticed was the bold colouring, which is a lot more colourful than in previous issues. This is because we have a new contributor and it’s none other than Transformers colourist and Visionaries editor Steve White. In the earlier years of Transformers the colours were all beautifully hand-painted, before a new system was introduced that produced much flatter results initially. But in the right hands it could be stunning. Steve’s were one such pair of hands. His colours really pop, bringing depth and excitement to a story that’s already fun to read.

I asked Steve about his time working on Jurassic Park and he told me that while it was a work-for-hire gig he was a big fan of Mark’s and of Xenozoic Tales. He produced these beautiful results with markers on photocopies of the art, and he’d travel to North London to Dark Horse International’s little (according to Steve) office to pick up and return the pages.

Months previous, a great scientist by the name of Fessenden had asked Jack Tenrec to take him and his team out to a swamp for their research, explaining he’d discovered a secret to saving their crops. Now returning with a rescue team, Jack faces off against vicious, overgrown versions of dinosaurs that are usually tiny and docile. They start to show hunting skills they’re simply not meant to have, circling the team and attacking systematically. Eventually they make it to the station which is now a crumbling wreck and discover the shocking transformation of Fessenden.

His team are nowhere to be found, he isn’t doing any of the work he was there to accomplish and his head has become a strange elongated shape, covered in what looks like pulsating veins, like his brain is trying to push itself out through his skull. Jack sets out to find the missing researchers, only to literally stumble upon creepy blob-like creatures not dissimilar to his old friend’s head, then a mass grave in the final panel.

While so far there’s nothing particularly original here, these little blobs are intriguing and having read Mark’s other tales printed in this comic so far I know the payoff will be excellent. Its pacing is perfect and I can’t overemphasise how much Steve’s colouring adds to the rich atmosphere.

While this is listed as ‘Chapter Five’ on the contents page it’s actually the first strip in the series, originally published in Death Rattle magazine in the States in 1986. It acted as a kind of pilot, a testbed for a possible series. This explains why this particular chapter is simply called Xenozoic. It was clearly well received because Mark would go on to sporadically release more stories in his own comic. Jurassic Park editor Dick Hansom decided to print the few strips already coloured in a Marvel US reprinting first so we’re getting the story out of order. But it did mean we could enjoy this one coloured by Steve so I’m happy he waited.

Moving on to Ricardo Delgado‘s Age of Reptiles (coloured by James Sinclair) and it takes up less space this issue to make way for much more of the title strip, but it’s no less enthralling. We were left wondering what was going to happen next after the Deinonychuses stole the unhatched eggs from the Tyrannosaurus rex nest, but this issue the battle of the species takes a back seat, the pace slowing down and showing the dinosaurs going about their lives as dawn breaks. It begins with a pack of Parasaurolophuses lazily drinking by a waterfall, unaware they’re being watched.

I don’t think I picked up on this until a later issue when I was a teenager, but this is clearly a different T-rex than the one we’ve seen in previous issues. Only when both appeared together in a later chapter did I notice the completely different sets of markings, probably because I didn’t go back and read previous issues of comics before reading new issues back then, so when I saw this T.rex I incorrectly assumed I knew who it was. I love the little bird picking out a borrowing critter from its head and the dark shadows obscuring the hunter as he stalks his prey. The Parasaurolophuses are so delightfully drawn I can’t help but feel sorry for this one.

We see the predator begin to feast before cutting away to the silhouettes of the Deinonychuses making their way through the thick jungle. We’re not sure where they’re going yet and we don’t find out this issue, but what does happen here is highly entertaining and builds to a surprise cliffhanger. One of them gets distracted by a fish flopping about on the ground near a body of water and wants to stop to feed. You can see the distinct head markings of each character here, their leader not impressed with being slowed down and this little silent exchange did make me laugh.

That little red wiggle and that glare are comedy gold.

In the panel before it you’ll see some little bubbles appearing in the water beside them. Ignoring their leader (and not noticing there’s something in the water), the hungry dino picks up the fish and opens wide, presenting us with a full page of this action, panel-by-panel, the shadow of the mouth engulfing the fish, saliva dripping from its mouth, only for us to turn the page over and be confronted with this image below.

This was such a surprise ending. I’d forgotten all about it in the intervening years but seeing it now brings back the memory of having a feeling of real impatience and frustration at having to wait a month to see the next part. I think you’ll agree that’s understandable.

So this is where my monthly dive into this brilliant comic comes to an end once more. Three superb cliffhangers (even though only one was originally intended as such), interesting stories, plenty of action, loveable characters and the surprise addition of a favourite Marvel UK colourist. It’s been an absolute joy yet again. It will continue in this format for a little while yet, so there’s much to look forward to over the coming months and the next bit will be here on Tuesday 22nd February 2022.

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