AP(E)iNG THE MOViE: JURASSiC PARK AMAZON ADVENTURE!

I can’t believe it’s been four years since I last read an issue of the original Jurassic Park comic from Dark Horse International. I was going to publish this review last month but realising November would mark that amount of time I held it back. The comic had finished with the two surviving Velociraptors Alf and Celia having made their escape into the jungle. It felt like a satisfying open ending.

While our comic was cancelled at this point, in the States another four-issue mini-series called Raptors Hijack had already been published by November 1994. After that an annual was released in the spring of 1995, followed by an ongoing monthly that ran for nine issues before finally closing its massive King Kong-esque doors in 1996.

So that’s a lot of story I never knew existed until decades later when writing the blog. Thankfully, IDW gained the rights to Jurassic Park comics and in the 2010s released the complete run as a series of graphic novels. The first two volumes contain what we’ve covered already, so thankfully (given how much they cost on eBay) I’ve only had to purchase the last three books and that’s where we begin, with Classic Jurassic Park Volume 3: Amazon Adventure!

Ian Malcolm, Alan Grant, Ellie Satler and the impossibly-alive Robert Muldoon continue their search in the Amazon and end up face-to-face with a huge gorilla! Well, that shouldn’t be there! Indeed. A mysterious older woman is tracking it and ends up spotting the ‘raptors and how they communicate. In a ridiculous moment at the end of the first chapter she’s suddenly able to use hand gestures to talk to an extinct species she only discovered a few hours before.

Ellie is grabbed by the gorilla but escapes when it and the dinosaurs go toe-to-toe. Afterwards, Alf wants to hunt her down but Celia won’t help, harking back to the regular comic and how Ellie’s kindness to Celia affected her. While all this excitement is going on poor Ian gets a fever. Why is it always him who has to get injured and taken out of the action? As if this wasn’t bad enough he’s also attacked by a leopard! Did writer Steve Englehart just not like Jeff Goldblum?

The plot isn’t really original, even back when we only had the one movie. Biosyn and the old lady (Dr. Belvedere, their communications expert) trap the ‘raptors and build a wall around them which is nowhere near big enough and patrol it with useless guards. Last seen in #10, Fischer returns and is now working for Ingen’s competition. He says he inspected Jurassic Park and it was secure, it was the workers’ fault it all went to pot. This new barrier that he’s also designed is built very quickly and corners cut and would you believe it, that comes back to haunt him. Who could’ve predicted that?

Celia gives birth to some really cool-looking babies and there are some sweet scenes in here, although the art isn’t exactly on a par with the comic’s Age of Reptiles. In fact, at times it looks very rushed. Pencils are by Neil Vokes (Blood of Dracula, Elvira, Evil Ed), inks by Rich Rankin (Robotech, Elementals, Terminator) and colours are by Renée Witterstaetter, with lettering by John Costanza and Brad K. Joyce. In the end the dinos escape by digging under the fence and along the way we get some very Jurassic Park-like moments, such as Muldoon and Grant stranded on a small island next to a raging waterfall with predators nearby, and Fischer gets a suitably grotesque death scene.

However, there’s also a lot which feels very out of place and a lot of actions taken by the characters that just seem plain weird. First up, there are helicopter battles and crashes, Biosyn ordering the murder of the main characters and Ian getting hallucinations that seem to predict what’s going to happen to the other characters he’s nowhere near. Where this came from is anyone’s guess.

Speaking of murder, Muldoon kills some men with his bare hands and seems to enjoy it a bit too much! Apparently he’s also always hated Ian, something which never came across in the film, although I can’t remember their relationship in the novel. If anything, in the movie (which this is the sequel to) the two characters were just as sceptical of Jurassic Park as each other.

Then we have the biggest changes, in Ian and John Hammond. Ian’s character strays from the film when he actually makes physical moves on Ellie, something he would never have done after getting to know her and Alan. But it’s Hammond who’s the most shocking here. He’s worked out that the whole thing was shot to hell thanks to Biosyn funding Denis Nedry’s actions, which is fair enough. However, it’s his reaction that shocks.

His actions don’t suit the character at all. Yes, he was a bit of a git in the book but, again, this is a sequel to the film and not the novel. Hammond’s men infiltrate Biosyn’s headquarters and blow part of it up, taking a lot of innocent people with it. When he’s told over the phone by his counterpart in Biosyn that people were killed Hammond just smiles, hangs up and goes back to sleep! Richard Attenborough would never.

If this all sounds confusing to you then you’ll have a good idea of how I felt reading it. The regular comic’s story wasn’t perfect (Muldoon’s return a particular sticking point) but by this stage I have to say if the first movie sequel had been anything like this I don’t think we’d have seen any more. It ends on a good point from Ellie and a funny line from Ian as you can see here. It’s almost like right in the very final panel things became a bit more like Jurassic Park and its sequels again.

The book ends with two shorter one-shot tales from the Jurassic Park Annual. In the States comics annuals are just regular one-off comics, not the large hardback volumes we get over here. The art is rather good though. Death Lizards is written by Neil Barrett Jr (Predator: Blood Feud, Batman: Ultimate Evil, Hard Looks), pencilled by Claude St Aubin (Cyborg, Amazing Spider-Man, Voyager Planet Killer), inked by Margeaux Pepoy (Ghost Rider, Godzilla, Little Orphan Annie), lettered by Brad and coloured by Renée.

Set in Costa Rica four years after the storm in the movie, we see a community who have recently rebuilt their town being terrorised by a Dilophosaurus pack. There’s some nice Chaos Theory to kick things off, with a flashback to the storm tearing Isla Nublar apart and a tree hit by lightning fall into roiling waters and getting washed out to sea with a handful of dinosaur eggs inside it.

The human characters are a biking gang who lose friends to the dinosaurs. Initially thinking they’re dealing with a vicious serial killer they decide to head out for revenge against the perceived enemy after a lack of interest from the police. However, after the revelation of what’s actually responsible it turns into a by-the-numbers action strip. The stilted dialogue and sometimes amateurish lettering (some captions look like they were added in later) don’t help things either.

Sneakers by Jurassic Park artists Michael Golden and Renée Witterstaetter is the final tale. It’s pencilled and lettered by Ed Murr (Marvel Comics Presents, Avengers, Punisher War Journal), inked by Bob Almond (Black Panther, Deadpool, Nightmare on Elm Street) and coloured by Frank Lopez (Shadowhawk, Black Widow, Frank). Set before the movie, a foreign investor lands on the island with his young daughter who’s taken on a tour in a jeep. But she jumps out and runs down the road near the T-rex paddock, unable to explain or ask for help because she doesn’t speak English.

At the same time the T-rex gets agitated and tries to shove a tree into the electric fence to short it. For much of the tale we’re in the control room and unable to determine if the T-rex has gotten out. We know there was no escape by the dinosaurs until the movie so any suspense is ruined, and working out how to knock off the electric fence wouldn’t make any sense before the movie’s story. In the end the girl’s pet ferret was in her bag and it had fallen off the back of the jeep, so she ran back to get it. The T-rex had apparently smelled it and gotten incredibly worked up over what wouldn’t have been much of a snack.

This graphic novel has been disappointing. I loved the Jurassic Park comic, it had brought me back to the world of comics as a teen after I thought I’d grown out of them. It had its flaws (Muldoon) but I really enjoyed it and was super hyped to read where the story went next after decades of thinking there hadn’t been any more. But this book has felt less like the next chapter and more like one of those dodgy rip-off copycat movies on the SciFi Channel.

The very basic plot feels like it’s trying to be Jurassic Park-like instead of an official Jurassic Park story, if that makes sense. The characters feel like two-dimensional copies of those we all loved rather than actually being them. In hindsight, I’m glad the UK comic stopped when it did and went out on a high.

I don’t like being overly negative on the blog. I deliberately choose comics I know I’ll enjoy while at the same time giving them honest reviews. This feels like one story too many and there are two more volumes to go! They’ll reprint the ongoing Return to Jurassic Park comic that only lasted nine issues in the US. I’ll keep my fingers crossed this volume was a blip and the team can return to form when the characters return to Isla Nublar. Watch out for the next volume in 2027.

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THE MiGHTY MARVEL CHECKLiST: WEEK 67

SATURDAY 4th NOVEMBER 1989

The return of two huge baddies this week on the covers of our main Marvel UK comics, although there’s a rather big difference in vibe. Anthony Williams, Dave Harwood and Robin Bouttell were behind the huge, lumbering Stay Puft Marshmallow Man for The Real Ghostbusters, while Megatron and his shadowy alter ego were drawn by Andrew Wildman for Transformers and Action Force.

The reason behind two Megatrons was that a previous plot point in the UK strips had gone unresolved for a long time, namely whether his mind was his own or that of the Cybertron-based commander, Lord Straxus. With writer Simon Furman now working for Marvel on both sides of the Atlantic and given his plans for future stories, any original plan he had for resolving this was brought forward into this two-parter. It did feel rushed after all this time and it was a bit disappointing after the brilliant set up, but at least long-time readers had it addressed rather than ignored. Of course, as a kid I hadn’t read the original storylines so this was all very confusing!

Inside The Real Ghostbusters was a story called These Spooks Were Made For Walking, a fun play on words for a tale about haunted shoes forcing people into long runs around New York. It’s not a reprint, but there was a previous strip some time back in the same comic called These Boots Were Made For Haunting. The plot? Haunted boots forcing people into long runs around New York. Hmm. Between this and the recent reprints was the comic running out of ideas 19 months into its run? (No pun intended.) Oh well, at least the rest of the issue was completely original and didn’t include more returning spooks from the movie like it did just ten weeks ago. Ahem.

Elsewhere, Doctor Who Magazine leading with pin-ups might sound strange in hindsight, given how they’d be considered as nothing more than space-fillers today, but you’ve got to remember these were the days before widespread internet, so pin ups were often the only way fans could enjoy stills from older episodes. I’ll forgive The Punisher for the misplaced apostrophe (I’m sorry, when it’s used like that it really bugs me) because the quick description of the stories more often than not make me want to add it to the blog’s list of potential real time read throughs. Even if it’s just to find out more about The ‘Nam, which as the back up is criminally underserved on the checklists.

The Incredible Hulk continues to present other stories he himself probably wouldn’t give a hoot about but which British Marvel fans would hopefully lap up. In fact, reading this checklist you’d be forgiven for thinking this was a range of titles in rude health, that Marvel UK were riding high. Unfortunately, one would be cancelled by Christmas (actually, right at Christmas!), with another only a few months behind. Oh well, at least that could make them easier to collect the complete sets of for the OiNK Blog, right? “Every cloud” and all that.

Next week we’re checklist-less again for the last time. In its place is an advert for a graphic novel that felt very out of place in the pages of my comics, although it may have been of interest to my mum! Plus, some insight into the behind-the-scenes of one of our regular comics from a Marvel UK editor and writer! See you in seven.

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ALiENS: WHAT IF…? (CARTER BURKE SURViVED)

On 21st December 1992 my 15th birthday came to an end with Aliens on TV. Initially, I’d sat down to watch it with my mum because Sigourney Weaver was in it and I was a Ghostbusters fan, but we were both quickly drawn in. I’ve scoured the TV schedules on my birthday every year since but there’s never been a movie to match it. Now, 34 years later, and for the third year in a row since my mum passed away, I’ll mark that night with what has become one of my traditional Christmas watches.

Paul Reiser played Carter Burke, the company man we were led to believe was a decent guy. Paul’s performance is so likeable that the slow reveal of his true intentions made for compelling viewing. I grew up watching Paul on the sitcom My Two Dads and his famous “This is not my…” line from the Beverly Hills Cop movies was very quotable back in school. Decades later, on October 2024 he appeared on Late Night with Seth Meyers , a show I watch every day over breakfast.

A few minutes in I was thrilled to hear the two of them discuss a new Aliens: What If…? comic from Marvel with the premise of telling a story following Burke if he had survived the movie. Paul collaborated with his son and there are some funny stories in the interview about that aspect of the project. You can also see some of the covers and Paul’s general reaction to the idea and what he thought of working on it.

The actual scripts are by Hans Rodionoff (Man-Thing, Damage Control) and Adam F. Goldberg (The Goldbergs TV show, the movies The Muppets’ Wizard of Oz and How to Train Your Dragon), Giui Vilanova (The A-Team, Dark Shadows, The Punisher) is the artist, Yen Nitro (Venom, Catpool & Mousepool, Predator Vs Spider-Man) the colourist, Clayton Cowles (Adventureman, Shang-Chi, Thor) the letterer and Phil Noto (Batgirl, Grendel, G.I. Joe) the cover artist.

However, as well as their input on the idea and plot, the scripts would also be sent back to Paul and his son Leon to add to or edit the character’s speech to make sure it flowed in his natural voice, and to add in some comedy. In hindsight this works really well. It doesn’t take away from it being an Aliens horror tale but it can also be very funny. It’s easily the funniest Aliens comic you’re ever likely to read thanks to Burke’s reactions to the ever-worsening situation around him.

There’s a famous deleted scene from the movie which involved Ripley discovering Burke in the Alien nest, trapped in the walls. He tells her he can feel one growing inside him and begs her to help. She simply hands him a grenade and moves on. It was cut because director James Cameron realised that Burke would still have had the face hugger on his head by this point so it didn’t make sense. However, you can still see the scene in the comics adaptation, Newt’s Tale, in #7 of the 90s UK Aliens comic (coincidentally enough the first Christmas issue).

What If…? begins by replaying his last moments in the film but he isn’t killed as we assumed from his final seconds. Instead he’s captured, but unlike the deleted scene the face hugger doesn’t get a chance to attach itself. Instead, the explosion set off by Vasquez and Gorman rocks through the ventilation shafts and shatters the alien resin holding Burke captive. We then see him hiding in the shadows of the final scenes of the film, witnessing it all play out. The opening scene from Alien³ even gets a look in.

In the aftermath, Weyland-Yutani sees him as the perfect fall guy so the company declares that their wish to capture aliens for biological weapons research was all his idea. We catch up with him decades later as the boss of an all-but-forgotten mining planet with a workforce that hates him, his estranged daughter Brie who hates him and soon Yutani’s son Hiro, who hates him.

Burke has a plan to redeem his name, mend things with Brie and get off the godforsaken rock. Of course, the plan involves a xenomorph. You’d think he’d have learned his lesson, if not from his own experiences then from all the movies! (I jest.) As it turns out, his wife has been cryofrozen to stop her cancer from advancing any further and alien DNA holds the answer to create a medical panacea.

We know from previous Aliens comic strips in the 90s that their slime contains potential medical applications and a recreational drug. Although, the modern Marvel comics are ignoring all of those strips so whether this is still true in the Alien universe anymore I’m not sure. His synth Cygnus (who hates him) secures an alien egg after decades in space and Burke is ready to make his move. Apart from having this character back from the dead it all sounds oh so familiar.

After watching the movies and reading Dark Horse International’s 90s Aliens comic this just feels like more of the same. The key human beat that’s different is the link between the predictable plot and Zoe, Burke’s wife. While he does have a larger plan to clear his name and get his revenge on the company, the story has a heart at its centre and a surprisingly emotional thread for Burke and his family.

We sympathise while at the same time wanting to scream at him for making the same mistake every single human has ever made in the Alien franchise, that of thinking they can control any outcome that involves the creatures. If the descendants of Dr Ian Malcolm existed in the Alien universe they’d be very, very busy.

I’ve spent most of this review summing up the creation of this mini-series and the storyline. Have I left enough room to sum up my opinions? The thing is, I can pretty much do so by telling you about one specific moment. Or rather, moments, plural. At one point they capture the face hugger only for them to lose hold of it and watch it escape through a vent into the larger mining area. Then it happens again, and again.

It’s presented as a recurring joke about the ineptitude of Burke. His reaction to it continually happening is certainly funny. But, no matter how much I might have giggled at what he says, the fact it keeps happening just gets repetitive. After a while it stops feeling like a recurring joke and more like lazy plotting. With several throwbacks that copy moments and dialogue from the movie that feeling doesn’t really go away.

For the first while in the movie we liked the character of Burke. (We were also used to Paul playing likeable characters.) In the end though, we all loved to hate him. Here, the reader’s feelings for him go in the opposite direction, which I’ll admit is clever. By the end we’re back to liking him again despite everything he tried (and caused) in the film. Paul’s input is clear. Burke has great comic timing, feels like a fully developed character, is fallible and we believe he has atoned so his comedy really lands.

But unfortunately all of this potential is tied to a storyline that does nothing new. Burke himself feels like the only original element, which is ironic given he’s an already established character. Apart from his reactions everything that happens around him is wholly predictable. As such, when it all ends it’s strange that the only memorable thing in an Aliens horror tale is the humour.

It’s great humour though and really benefits from the unique way in which this was written. It’s a shame the comic team couldn’t come up with something just as unique for Paul to collaborate on. If you can grab the five issues (or the collected graphic novel) for cheap somewhere I’d recommend it as an interesting concept, for the central character and for Paul’s input. The ending is also left open, so there’s always hope that we’ll see more from Burke in a story that’ll do him justice.

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THE MiGHTY MARVEL CHECKLiST: WEEK 66

SATURDAY 28th OCTOBER 1989

Just a quickie this week. Kicking things off as usual with the covers for The Real Ghostbusters and Transformers and Action Force and, unlike last year, the former was actually marking the occasion of Halloween, as it really should’ve every year. Slimer is drawn by Brian Williamson, Dave Harwood and Robin Bouttell, the attack on the Autobot Ark is the work of Jeff Anderson.

Medic Ratchet, who was always a favourite character of mine in the early days of the Transformers comic, was going through something of a mental breakdown this week thanks to the Decepticon Micromasters controlling the bodies of his fallen comrades. He was always one of the better developed characters. In the exclusive UK strip one of the best artists at getting real character into these toys was Andrew Wildman. This week, Thunderwing attacked the chilled out (and ill-prepared) Autobots on the Ark and was announced as Decepticon leader after the successful mayhem and destruction. Let the games begin!

The Real Ghostbusters actually contained an honest-to-gosh reprint from an earlier issue this time and as a kid this really annoyed me (unlike Transformers which repeated some series from before I was a reader). Thankfully, they’d soon be replaced with American imports and the rest of the comic was always guaranteed quality. In particular, this week there was a surprise sequel story to an earlier strip about a haunted electric razor and the chaos this had caused for Peter. Both stories were among the funniest the comic produced, not that you’d know it was a funny comic from the advert appearing for the first time in other Marvel UK titles this week.

Then again, any fans of the movie and the cartoon should know what they’re going to get! This image was drawn by regular Real Ghostbusters artist, Anthony Larcombe and taken from one of his earlier strips. It would become synonymous with the comic for the rest of its run, as it was used in this promo for a long time throughout the publisher’s range. From what I recall, this dramatic entry into a client’s property to bust a supposedly terrifying monster was actually happening in Janine’s apartment where demons had taken possession of her mirror. I seem to recall it was more afraid of her than the ‘busters!

As you can see, there was no checklist in either of these comics this week. It was out there somewhere, possibly in the pages of the others I haven’t collected. It was mentioned on the editorial page of The Real Ghostbusters but where it should’ve been we were met with a half-page advert for The Incredible Hulk Presents instead, which you can check out in last week’s post as it happens.

The list reappears next week (for one week anyway) with details of no less than five comics, and our two lead weeklies have covers representing the return of two big baddies. One terrifying, one cuddly and delicious. See you in seven.

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BEANO #954: A GiFT OF AN iSSUE

Seven months later I’m finally back reading a classic issue of The Beano, this time from 1960. First up though, let me address something. This issue has a cover date of 29th October with a scheduled release day of every Thursday, despite the 29th having been a Friday. But if I told you the actual release date was Wednesday 26th October 1960 you might think I was wrong. Given the amount of people who tried to “correct” me about the previous three issues on socials I have to take a moment to explain.

British weekly humour comics were often dated for the Saturday after publication day and would be available the working day before the day written on the cover. Don’t believe me? Well, this comes straight from Lew Stringer, a bigger authority on British humour comics you’d be hard pressed to find. Of course, it doesn’t help that publishers (including DC Thomson) often celebrate anniversaries on the cover dates. But yep, all of my dates are correct, and with that let’s get stuck in.

I was never a fan of Biffo the Bear, drawn above by Dudley D. Watkins. I never really understood the appeal. He never did anything bear-like, he was just an ordinary, rather bland character to my young eyes and I ended up avoiding his strips in my friends’ Beano Books. The cover to #954 doesn’t change my opinion. Thankfully, David Law’s Dennis the Menace is on the very next page. However, what about that ending! For the most part the strip is fun old-fashioned Dennis fare, but he gets the slipper because his dad misheard him?! Beating your son when he did nothing wrong and you just weren’t listening? Wow, okay then!

Sadly, there’s no Halloween content in this issue despite us being so close to the holiday but it still marked an important part in Beano’s life. Harry Crammond had recently come on board as editor and the look and style of the comic was freshened up, becoming much more like that which my friends grew up with in the 80s. For example, the logo now has the famous Beano colours. There’s more familiarity with The Three Bears on the next page.

Drawn by the incredible Leo Baxendale I remember these characters well, even though I never personally bought the comic as a kid. They started out in Little Plum, their popularity leading to their own strip. Little Plum is in here too but its stereotypes are quite painful to read today so I’ve included the bears instead. Besides, their page is also much funnier! Always looking for their next Slap-Up Feed™, this is the perfect example of the lengths they’d go to every week. Still, the art is the star.

The comic had only recently increased to 16 pages after the war so a price hike was necessary and to ease the pain free gifts returned for the first time in several years. Normally used as a way of increasing slowing winter sales (thanks to the expense of Christmas), it’s the reason this issue was chosen for the box set. Strangely, there’s no indication of what the gift actually was, either in the comic or the bookazine. One thorough search online later and I found out it was one of a series of Clickitty Clickers.

Basically, they were bits of metal with drawings of characters on them that made an annoying clicking sound when pressed together. I could see plenty of these being purposely misplaced by many parents. You can check out the others available with other copies of this issue at the British Comics & Story Paper Index (where the images of the gifts above are from).

Another character we meet for the first time in this blog series is a favourite of mine in the modern Beano, Minnie the Minx. The undisputed (in my eyes anyway) star of the Christmas Specials given her history with Santa, here she’s also drawn by Leo. The story could be seen as somewhat Halloween’y I guess, even if the wonderfully drawn monstrous faces are awkwardly squeezed into the story in ways that don’t really make a lot of sense.

Speaking of Minnie and Santa, this year’s Christmas Special has already plopped through my letterbox and I’m using all of my will power to leave it be! I’m sure neither Minnie nor the comic will let us down this year. Back to our classic issue for now and Beano still had some adventure stories within its pages, albeit in picture-panel format rather than prose. Although, they seem to be showing their age more than ever.

The Ting-A-Ling Taylors is essentially a White Saviour tale of a British family (and their fire engine, weirdly) rescuing African wildlife when the locals prove unable to do so for some reason, despite having lived there for generations. It’s also telling that everyone in the family is given a name in this episode except for Mrs Taylor, who is only known as “his wife”. Next up, The Danger Man is such a clichéd 60s square-jawed hero I initially thought it was a spoof, but the Martian and his kids risk life and limb to rescue a cat from a burning skyscraper so you can call me a fan.

The Great Flood of London tells the tale of a family living inside the famous clock tower beside the Big Ben bell, scavenging for food in half-sunken ships and shops beneath the surface. It’s difficult to judge it by one chapter of an ongoing adventure, but while it’s interesting it doesn’t do much apart from detail their everyday lives. Not the most adventurous of adventures, this one.

Lord Snooty and his pals are still here and this issue’s strip is notable for including Professor Screwtop, who modern kids might recognise as the father of Rubi, another highlight of my yearly Christmas reads. The issue also contains The Bash Street Kids, Wonder Boy and Colonel Crackpot’s Circus, but my final highlight couldn’t be anything other than the strip on the back page.

The instantly recognisable art of Ken Reid (who OiNK Blog readers will know from Faceache in The Big Comic Book) is behind the chaotic Jonah. His lifelong dream is to be a bonafide sailor but, in a career where symbols of bad luck were treated very seriously, having every ship sink after he stepped on board is nothing short of a curse. Here, he sees a way around this by playing a role in a film that just happens to be filmed on a boat.

At the very end you can just about make out Jonah being thrown back on board and the next issue saw his attempts to integrate himself with the same crew as the strip often ran scenarios over several weeks rather than resetting each time. I remember Jonah from the 80s so I’m assuming he’ll be in the following issues in this set, but whether he’ll still be drawn by Ken… well, I can only hope. (Please, no spoilers, I want to find out for myself, that’s the whole point of the blog after all.)

Deciding to cover these eight issues on their original release dates means we’ve eight months to wait until the next one, #1768. It marked the creation of the Dennis and Gnasher Fan Club. So make sure you come back on Wednesday 2nd June 2027 as we relive 1976, the year of the first supercomputer, the release of Breakout in arcades and Carrie in cinemas, Jimmy Carter, the first craft to land on Mars, the discovery of the megamouth shark, Mrs. Warsaw-pact’s (from OiNK #10) namesake and that heat wave the news kept banging on about this summer.

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THE MiGHTY MARVEL CHECKLiST: WEEK 65

SATURDAY 21st OCTOBER 1989

I’ve got a bumper selection of nostalgia for you this week, with no less than five comics on the checklist and three contemporary comics adverts. Well, two are versions of each other but they still count. We kick things off as per usual with the covers of the two comics they’re all being pulled from.

Once again Brian Williamson, Dave Harwood and Robin Bouttell team up for The Real Ghostbusters and I’ve noticed in the way I’ve taken this photo that the sheen on the top-left clearly shows the higher paper grade both comics were enjoying around this time. For their outer 16 pages anyway. The funniest moment inside came from a tenuous link between a ghost pilot and dimensional planes in Spengler’s Spirit Guide, a page that was always guaranteed to raise a giggle.

Geoff Senior’s cover for Transformers and Action Force hinted at the return from the depths of the terrifying Thunderwing, but not before the American story continued to build towards the return of four classic characters in their new Pretender forms, namely Jazz, Bumblebee, Grimlock and Starscream. It was such an exciting time for me as a reader, the US and UK strips so simpatico with one another in each issue; side-by-side rather than the comic alternating between the two. Having four fan favourite characters I’d missed out on from earlier issues was the icing on the cake.

I mentioned before how the new look checklist would allow more comics to be covered upon occasion and this week is one such occasion. Ignore the listing of two strips as reprints for The Real Ghostbusters (possibly putting potential readers off), as discussed last time this was a mistake again. That Action Force story briefly mentioned in the entry for Transformers was superb, with the team disavowed while behind enemy lines. I’ve got great memories of that one with its superb original villains.

The cover to The Sleeze Brothers’ penultimate issue saw the duo’s idiotic faces coming out of an overflowing toilet, setting the scene perfectly for a misadventure in the sewers. Check it out in more depth in the full review at the link further below. The 13th edition of The Punisher began another new story that could easily have been set today, while the Thundercats got such a perfunctory description you have to wonder why the writer of the checklist even bothered.

On to our adverts. In this week’s Transformers the Deception Flamefeather came off the worse for wear thanks to his wannabe leader Thunderwing, but he got the star power treatment on the advert for the latest special.

Jeff Anderson’s pencils and Stephen Baskerville’s inks for the hugely enjoyable Enemy Action story were the stars of Collected Comics 14, one of the best reprint specials of the run which saw the Seacons, Firecons and Sparkler Minibots (the latter two groups based on pull-back-and-release toys that produced little sparks that were so much fun for us kids) up against none other than the always-entertaining Galvatron. Along with a superb annual story and some new A-Z fact-files it was a great special to see in the darker days with.

The other adverts were full-page and half-page variations for the new Incredible Hulk Presents, a weekly which saw the green one’s strip backed up with a variety of other tales from Action Force, Doctor Who and Indiana Jones. As a kid, the title star never appealed and his strips were the least interesting of those advertised, so I never tried the comic out. It didn’t last very long, just 12 issues and it ended one week before the checklists did, just two-and-a-half months after the premiere issue.

It had actually been launched the week before this but for some reason hadn’t made the cut for the checklists, despite there being plenty of room for it last time. I always thought it was a strange mix, what with Action Force and Doctor Who already having strips elsewhere. Although, apparently the Doctor’s stories here were brand new and would be reprinted in Doctor Who Magazine later. With four strips for what seemed like disparate audiences no wonder it didn’t last, becoming just another of a myriad of new comics launched by Marvel UK in 1988 and 1989 that disappeared quickly.

Next week, for the first time in 36 weeks there’ll be no checklist. Instead, one of our main comics gets an advert for those who were somehow unaware of it, or who maybe just needed a poke to buy one of the best comics around at the time. It’ll be here in seven days. Will you?

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PHOTOGRAPHiNG TRANSFORMERS UK: MONTH TWO (OCTOBER 1984)

It’s been a long wait but finally here we are with month two (of 89) of our photographic journey through every single issue of Marvel UK’s Transformers comic. We’ve doubled up for October 1984 with two fortnightly comics filled not only with classic Transformers strip action, but also some of the finest retro goodness. Prepare to take a trip back to the 80s and come away feeling very, very old.


iSSUE TWO – 4th OCTOBER 1984

#2: Marvel UK’s sophomore Transformers release begins with a simply beautiful John Ridgway cover. It’s not linked to the story but then again neither was last issue’s and that’s not the point, it’s just a gorgeous piece of art and shows the toy models off in a great light, all while perfectly summing up children’s wonder at these new playthings. The cover would also be used for a future Collected Comics special where it better suited the story, albeit by coincidence. It would’ve made for a great free gift poster.

Inside, right from the off the nostalgia hits hard! Who else had one of these transforming watches? I did, although I can’t remember wearing it much so maybe it didn’t last too long. Then, in the main story (which is now partly black and white) there’s plenty of wonderful transforming images. In hindsight these could not have been easy to draw and some artists would end up not showing them mid-transformation like this. Lovely stuff.

The Autobots’ introductory spread was edited out of the strip itself to make a great poster in the middle of the comic, replacing some panels with the franchise’s title logo. Given how huge and epic this comic’s tale would become I love the quaint feeling of this, with its awkward poses to make sure everyone can be seen, the toy-accurate Ironhide and Ratchet, and the stilted introductory dialogue for the young readers to learn all of their details.

There are two prose features on robots this issue. The regular Robot Round-up takes a look at some of the most 80s-futuristic inventions imaginable, back when human-like robots were more fun and less terrifying. There’s also a special Doctor Who page on the robot props of the show at the time. Where are the Daleks, I hear you cry? Well, if you’re a fan you’d know why they’re not included. Glad to see the comic got that right. That just about rounds up our look at the second issue.

Cover by John Ridgway
The Transformers: Part Two plot by Bill Mantlo,
script by Ralph Macchio,
pencils by Frank Springer, inks by Kim DeMulder,
lettering by Michael Higgins & Rick Parker,
colours by Nel Yomtov


iSSUE THREE – 18th OCTOBER 1984

#3: Another fortnight, another Transformers UK comic from 42 years ago! Jerry Paris returns as cover artist for issue three and it’s another gorgeous piece of art with a big, chunky Bumblebee complete with toy-accurate limbs. Such a shame Jerry wasn’t a regular contributor, his work was perfect for this comic. He would return in the end much to readers’ delight, but not for another 164 issues!

Inside, we kick things off with our first fact file. Not the A-Z we all remember so fondly, instead it’s a tiny entry on the editorial pages for Autobot Hound using information from the toy box. It would actually take a surprisingly long time for the A-Z format to appear. In the meantime, the main strip happily trundles along with both small and simply gigantic scale scenes. Seamlessly complementing each other, this successful juxtaposition of huge far-fetched sci-fi coupled with human storylines continues in the movies to this day.

There’s a yellow Cliffjumper in the competition! Well, in this promo shot anyway. Speaking of the toys, the next Hasbro advert features more of the first wave of Autobots to hit the UK market. If you had to choose, which one would you go for? I think I’d have picked Hound, he looks the most intricate from the teeny, tiny drawings. Yep, that’s right, no such thing as actual photographs of the toys to choose from back then.

Robot Round-up details a somewhat familiar toy range. Who remembers coveting these in the Argos catalogue, only to be let down by them when you actually got to play with one at a friend’s house? There are also another couple of stills from the TV adverts masquerading as pin ups before the issue is rounded off with the 1985 Christmas annuals, one of which I’ve actually covered on the blog. You can check it out via the link at the bottom of this post along with a link to a post featuring all of Marvel UK’s annuals adverts during the comic’s lifetime.

Cover by Jerry Paris
Power Play: Part One plot by Bill Mantlo,
script by Jim Salicrup, pencils by Frank Springer,
inks by Kim DeMulder,
lettering by Janice Chiang & Rick Parker,
colours by Nel Yomtov


If your memory of the Transformers comic is of a full-colour, 24-page weekly with one main Transformers strip and an Action Force back up, you’re not alone. What do you make of these early issues? They’re a bit different, aren’t they? As always, the blog’s comments section and its social media accounts are ready for you. We’re only at the beginning of our journey, let’s make it an interactive one!

Our next round up on Friday 20th November (one day before my decorations go up at OiNK Blog Towers!) will contain the first American cover, the first battle between Optimus Prime and Megatron, Robby the Robot (yes, him), the comic’s first humour strip and I’ll be wondering who on Earth is Sieve-Head?!

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ALSO ON THE OiNK BLOG:
Kim DeMulder in Havoc
Rick Parker in G.I. Joe
Nel Yomtov in The Sleeze Brothers
Jim Salicrup in Visionaries and Jurassic Park
Janice Chiang in Visionaries

THE MiGHTY MARVEL CHECKLiST: WEEK 64

SATURDAY 14th OCTOBER 1989

It took the talented trio of Brian Williamson, Dave Harwood and Robin Bouttell to produce the week’s cover for The Real Ghostbusters, while Andrew Wildman had to cope all on his lonesome to knock out this fantastic front page for Transformers and Action Force with some funny hidden gems in there (a toaster, bike pedal and a UK plug?).

At last the New York team got the same paper upgrade the Cybertronians had been enjoying on-and-off for a while. Speaking of things finally happening, that Pharaoh story mentioned in week 59’s checklist saw the light of day, but now of course Spengler’s Spirit Guide no longer matched up. A child’s letter questioned the science behind the naming of their Proton Packs and for once the comic gave a considered, serious response! Again, this issue was all-new but the checklist describes some stories as reprints. There could be a reason for this, one which we may get a definitive answer to on the blog in the future.

First, that Transformers cover represented a very funny strip also drawn by Andrew. It involved a double-dealing ‘bot and The Mechannibals in a tense stand off followed by a magnificent 80s-style bar brawl, but the highlight was (letter answerer) Dreadwind and his partner, Darkwing. Drunk on dodgy oil after the failure of their most recent mission several months back, the story jumped back and forth between their slurred speech and feeling-sorry-for-themselves comedy in every left-hand panel, while the drama and action played out in every right-hand panel. It’s hilarious stuff and indicative of the kind of thing the comic was perfect at in this three-story format. It also broke up all of that tension and darkness from previous weeks nicely.

As you can see, this week’s checklist was light on quantity but the comics featured made up for that in quality. Not only was the UK Transformers story magnificent this week, the imported US stories changed hands, with Brit Simon Furman now writing for both sides of the Atlantic. Hasbro had brought back four toys from the original line up as Pretenders and this was the beginning of Simon’s wonderful take on their reissue. From here until the end (in January 1992) Simon would do a magnificent job of creating back stories for any toy release they could come up with.

Also, check out the link below to see Lew Stringer introduce Dara O’Briain in Combat Colin! (Not really.)

The only other new point of interest this week was the latest issue of The Punisher and, while the comic itself did a better job of it (from what I’m told), I’m really not comfortable with how these checklists have generalised certain things (groups, historical moments, plot points) at times. It’ll be interesting to see how the comic itself portrayed these stories. In the meantime, you can look forward to an absolute bumper crop of goodies in next week’s post with five comics on the checklist and three new adverts. Well, two really. Well, technically three. You’ll see what I mean in seven.

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DAVY FRANCiS’ SHOEBOX: PART THREE

This third selection from OiNK cartoonist Davy Francis’ shoebox of goodies didn’t inspire confidence when I began flicking through them. Masses of football, porno adverts and supposedly comedic breasts and phalluses met the eye in the pages of Sweet FA, while The Sunday Sport’s name on the front of UT produced a similar level of dread. But I took a deep breath, delved deep and found some little gems from some of our favourite OiNK cartoonists.

First up is UT, created by none other than Kev F Sutherland. Beginning as a parody strip in another publication, UT became its own title in September 1991. While it rode the wave of Viz copies, Kev’s intention was to attract some top established comics talent and produce strips that were less about shock value and more about actual comedy. However, financial backing was required and Sunday Sport’s publishers ended up footing the bill, creating the harsh contrast of quality strips printed opposite pornographic adverts for videos and sex chat lines.

“That was my dilemma”, Kev told me recently. “They wanted a magazine to carry that sort of ad, and I wanted to make Mad Magazine but funny.” It appears, however, that this dichotomy was harmonious enough behind-the-scenes at least. “To an extent,” says Kev. “In fact, thinking about it, I can’t remember any interference.”

One strip I really like in UT feels a bit autobiographical, with the magazine’s editor (Kev in real life) battling a stereotypical porno publisher pushing for overly disgusting contents, taking the hand out of the very company financing it. You can see it above in the opening spread to the dummy copy of #1, which somehow ended up in Davy’s possession and is full of blank pages between samples of strips.

”UT was organised between me, Sunday Sport and the printers in Bristol”, explains Kev. ”I went in there in person a lot, and the dummy copies were part of the development process. Once they turned the machine on and started the presses rolling there was no point in just doing one copy, so quite a few were made. I suppose they were used to show to advertisers and newsagents. I may only have one left here myself but I once had more.”

There’s definitely some humour in UT that we rightly wouldn’t want to see today that seems to be squarely aimed at the Sunday Sport readership. (Teenage Lesbian Nymphomaniac Mutant Bimbo Surfers is just one example of many strips that paint lesbians as sex mad, probably because Sport readers wanted to believe they were.) It’s very much a product of the 90s adult comics market despite Kev’s grander plans. While for the most part it’s intelligently written and very funny, I feel it’s let down somewhat by that kind of strip named above and the relentlessness of its very adult advertisements.

It’s frustrating because when it stops pandering to that audience it can be genuinely brilliant. For example, Kev’s Blunderbirds is a fantastic Thunderbirds parody with an accident prone rescue team. (I love how that downed jumbo jet is freed!) I was also very happy to see a continuation of Kev’s Meanwhile… from OiNK. Speaking of OiNK, it wouldn’t be Davy’s shoebox without some fun pages from him and fans will enjoy his more OiNK-like silliness rather than the penis-shaped rudeness of Electric Soup.

David Leach’s Conan spoof, Arthur Pilkington, Chartered Barbarian is great fun, even if it does remind me of Jeremy Banx’s Konan the Accountant from OiNK, and Battler Britain is an incredibly funny, fast-paced riff on the “jolly good show” kind of British comic heroes the then-adult audience may have grown up with. It’s drawn by Malcolm Douglas, aka OiNK’s very own J.T. Dogg. Despite not having the production values and paper quality to reproduce it that OiNK had, it’s still lovely to look at and at times feels like a World War II-set Ham Dare!

I admit I also laughed at UT #2’s declaration on the front page that it was “Not as funny as it used to be”. Published over a year-and-a-half, UT consisted of eight regular issues and two reprint specials. I find it hard to recommend to OiNK Blog readers given the Sunday Sport contents prevalent in each issue, but if you can get past that tabloid nonsense there are a lot of laughs to be had here.

Moving on to Sweet FA, a bi-monthly football comic-magazine that boasts of ”Bringing the game into disrepute” on its covers. Davy’s shoebox contains a handful from volume one and the first five issues of volume two, but I can find little-to-no information on it anywhere so I’m pretty much going by what I have in front of me. Named in its list of main contributors is Lew Stringer despite football not really being his thing (his words to me). Unfortunately, he can’t remember who wrote the scripts he drew, which included one of the few highlights in here, called Tightarse.

Also contributing (although not anywhere near as much as Lew) are Davy Francis, J.T. Dogg and Jim Eldridge, who drew some of the Knight Rider Annuals in the 80s and who I’ve interviewed for a special post about the books this Christmas (2026). Much like UT this was intended for a particular audience. Pretty much the same audience, actually.

While volume two’s back issues page warns that “Volume 1 issues are not suitable for children”, it’s not like the later ones are! However, the earlier editions contain much more Sunday Sport-type content with photographs of naked (and nearly naked) women and they have a sleazy tabloid Page 3 feeling about them. There was even a free gift (thankfully lost) of postcards featuring bikini-clad women that required the reader to lick them to remove their clothes!

Add in the fact the title is all about football and this really isn’t my cup of tea at all. So apologies if footie fans want to see more highlights than the three I’ve plucked out, but with every single strip focussing on the game all of the joke references are pretty much lost on me. I’m not the ideal person to choose the best examples of Sweet FA’s contents. This series of posts isn’t about that though, it’s about showing some new content from OiNK’s cartoonists and I can do that okay.

Flicking passed atrocities such as Sporting Lesbians, Football Bimbo and a ‘joke’ headline that asks, “Should birds be allowed to play football?”, while reminding myself of how far we’ve come since then I discovered Jimmy Armchair by Davy. At the time not everyone had access to satellite or cable television, with many stuck with the five terrestrial channels. Jimmy was one of those people who’d take advantage not only of owning such a device, but also of his friends’ eagerness to watch the game.

J.T. Dogg draws Sweet FA’s take on Ripley’s Believe It or Not, now named after a contemporary footballer and very much skewed towards the “Not” in the title. These feel like a spoof version of fellow OiNK cartoonist Steve McGarry’s football fact-files, and even I was able to crack a smile and have a giggle with this one despite not knowing who these people were. Plus it’s always nice to see some artwork from Malcolm, his detailed style coming across nicely even in black and white here.

There’s just the one part left in this series and I’m hopeful it’ll be a Gas! Quite literally. While I haven’t peered inside its pages yet, I’ve heard good things about Gas comic and the amount of content in it from OiNK contributors, so here’s hoping for more humour along the lines of our favourite comic next time. We’ll wrap up Davy’s shoebox in shiny gift wrap in a couple of months during Christmas 2026.

BACK TO PART TWO

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THE MiGHTY MARVEL CHECKLiST: WEEK 63

SATURDAY 7th OCTOBER 1989

Another pretty generic cover for The Real Ghostbusters comic this week, even without a free gift. It’s still a nice piece by John Marshall and Dave Harwood though, even if it is put to shame somewhat by Geoff Senior’s fantastic Transformers and Action Force cover featuring the Mayhem Attack Squad!

Geoff’s art really shone this week thanks to Marvel UK upping the paper quality again, the outer 16 pages adding a gorgeous gloss and weight to the comic, it was that good. Geoff also draws the black and white UK strip and it was an action-packed few pages after the tension building the past few weeks. Dare I say it but I think it looked even more stunning in black and white thanks to the dark nature of the story and the atmosphere Geoff brought to it with his inks. Maybe it’s due to the lack of colour that my eyes are picking out more details or perhaps Geoff was really able to go to town for the same reason. Simply incredible stuff and you can check out some highlights at the link below.

Inside The Real Ghostbusters it’s all brand new material again after some reprints, which the checklist gets wrong. Again. The list really hasn’t been working in this comic’s favour for a while now. With the final part of the multi-issue competition the editor finally decided it’s time to show us some photos and gave details of the plethora of prizes up for grabs. That list in full: a trike, jogging bottoms, hooded sweatshirt, a parka, a visor, a watch, a ghostly make-up kit, the new annual, a Ghostball, more books and book/cassette packs. Quite the haul! Not sure why I never entered it. Perhaps I didn’t want to be lumbered with the trike or make-up.

A quick glance of the (colour) checklist and the only other new entry was #11 of The Punisher weekly. Reading his bit I’d have been concerned about its worldviews being a bit restricted, a bit too 80s, if it weren’t for who the baddies were the last few weeks, so I know that’s not the case. I’m very aware of how certain hateful people in America wear the comic’s skull motif nowadays and how ridiculed they are for completely missing the point of the character and the stories he starred in. I’ll have to find out for myself one of these days. The Sleeze Brothers’ trip to an outer space Bates Motel continued to bring up the rear and that’s yer lot for this week.

Yup, no new adverts to feature this time. In fact, not only do next week’s comics not feature any either, but the checklist has even less contents than normal! There’s a Transformers cover that brings back some funny memories though, so we’ll reminisce about that instead in seven days.

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