Tag Archives: Tom Paterson


As a child one of my regular orders at the newsagents was for Fleetway’s Big Comic Fortnightly, which I collected from #1 for a couple of years after receiving a giant book the previous Christmas (the 1988 volume). I didn’t know until deciding to collect the books for the blog that there had actually been another the year before; when it had hit the shelves originally I hadn’t even discovered OiNK (my first comic) yet. Now I’ve been able to complete the collection of eight huge tomes that make up the Big Comic Book series, released between 1986 and 1993.

While they’d have been available since the end of the summer, it was Christmas Day when most of us would’ve received these so I’m going to cover one each festive season. (At least you know the blog will be about for a bit now!) While OiNK was more in tune with my sense of humour than more traditional humour comics, that doesn’t mean there aren’t plenty of smiles and a few chortles to be had here. With 256 pages it’s a cliché to say it but there is something for everyone. Here are a few of my own personal highlights.

I can’t remember these first characters from the fortnightly or books as a kid, but that’s probably more a lack of memory on my part. Happy Families is drawn here by Dick Millington and I’m sure it can resonate with many of us around this time of year. The Happies are made up of Mum, Dad, Grandad, Sharon and the twins Vicki and Dicky and the scenario is much like the rest of the book’s comic strips, a simple but effective one; in Happy Families a small disagreement over something very unimportant would escalate until the whole family was at war with each other.

As with much of the contents in the book this is only one of several Happy Families strips, although most of the others end up so rowdy the police get involved. The stories can vary from them all being at each others’ throats by the end, all of them being punished in some way, or one or two of them getting sweet revenge on the rest of the family. Yet at the start of each new strip they’re back to loving one another again. Families, eh? These strips may even have been somewhat cathartic for some readers’ parents or older siblings on Christmas Day.

Regular blog readers will know I’m a sucker for a comical shark in the pages of OiNK due to my obsession with the creatures. This stemmed from my favourite movie of all time, Jaws which inspired teenage me to read up on the real fish and decades later I’m still fascinated. In fact, my favourite ever page of OiNK was a parody of Jaws in #4 but even the top comic of all time has to take a bow to the following star of Monster Fun.

When I started collecting Big Comic it would still be a couple of years before I’d see the best film ever made but I always loved Gums. I was reading this funny strip very obviously inspired by that movie before I saw it. After I did eventually watch Jaws I just enjoyed this toothless version even more so as a result. Gums was originally created by writer Roy Davis and artist Robert Nixon, the above strip is taken from Buster after Monster Fun folded and is drawn by John Geering (who also contributed to a handful of OiNKs).

To me he was always a Geering character. John gives such fantastic, expressive gestures to Gums who thought he was a terrifying monster of the deep, but the cast of recurring characters who lived with him weren’t exactly quaking in the depths. The best thing was that Gums would sometimes triumph in his schemes which kept things fresh. With quite a few strips in this one book, it’s clear he was a fan favourite. Our next character also originated in Monster Fun.

Kid Kong’s original artist was also Robert Nixon, although this Buster strip is drawn by Rob Lee and alongside Gums he lives on today in Rebellion’s seasonal Monster Fun specials in new stories by new artists. Originally an escapee from a zoo and much larger, he was shrunk down to make it easier to write stories in a family home setting, although still having to stoop down to fit in Granny Smith’s house. Granny was chronically short-sighted and hard of hearing, mistaking Kong as her own.

As enjoyable as these have been so far, not all of the contents hit the spot as much as these examples. Some haven’t aged well, in fact some of those I read at the time hadn’t even aged well by the late 80s. But whether it was the latest book or the fortnightly comic there was enough content to ensure plenty of enjoyment and the odd chortle from a favourite character. It’s a cliché, but the sheer size of Big Comic meant every reader would have some favourites and get a lot from each volume. Just don’t be expecting OiNK levels of guffaws. Unless you’re reading Gums, of course.

In recent years Ken Reid’s Faceache has had something of a resurgence, from a gorgeous hardback collection to new strips alongside the two stars above. Created for Jet comic but (yet again) a later star of Buster, Ken’s style is instantly recognisable and upon first glance may seem very traditional, very DC Thomson-esque to the uninitiated. But you soon realise these are very different to pretty much everything else in this book!

Ken’s work really pops, really stands out, which is no small feat in such a huge book

The humour has a different feel to it, not least thanks to the creative ‘scrunges’ Faceache pulls off. This juxtaposition works, the strips feel fresh even today with a unique art style. Ken’s work really pops, really stands out, which is no small feat in such a huge book where everything is black and white on cheap paper stock. However, if you’re scanning through a Big Comic Book these really do stop you in your tracks.

I’ve happy memories of the following family from my time with the fortnightly comic and they’d often be the first strip I’d read, the endings almost always guaranteed to raise a laugh. The Bumpkin Billionaires originated in Whoopee and told the tale of a family of Beverly Hillbilly types who had won billions of pounds on the pools (the family-friendly weekly sports betting which predated the lottery, kids – Phil) but who hated the lifestyle changes the money brought. Every story would show us another hare-brained scheme of Ma, Pa, Billy and Daisy‘s to get rid of all their cash, much to the disgruntlement of their bank manager.

Mike Lacey brought these loveable rogues to life and the physical comedy of the main characters was always a hoot. Most of the time the family’s plan would fall apart in the final frame or two and they’d somehow end up with even more money than they started with. I’ve included the one above because it was one of those rare occasions when things actually worked out in their favour. Well, I’m assuming these were rare occasions, I certainly can’t remember this happening regularly and I’ve fond memories of trying to work out what was about to go wrong for them.

Do you remember CBBC programme Grange Hill? My siblings watched it but I never did, although the theme tune is still seared into my mind. Whizzer & Chips came along with its own interpretation, Strange Hill which as a name I absolutely love. Teech was the poor sap trying to educate the wee monsters, who in this case actually were little monsters; a class full of spooks, ghouls and tiny versions of famous Hollywood creatures. I thought this particular example would be a good one to include on this blog, can you tell why?

Tom Paterson, who brought us a few ingenious early OiNK strips, is the perfect choice for these manic scripts with such a varied ensemble cast, and his trademark smelly socks, little squigly creatures and descriptive word bombs are all evident by the bucketload. These little extras always made his strips classics for me and his were the only ones I read in my brother’s Beanos.  I’ve always said it’s unfortunate he was too busy to contribute more to OiNK where surely his work was a perfect fit.

Drawn by Sid Burgon, Lolly Pop was an entrepreneur with an endless range of businesses and an equally endless supply of money. However, while his businesses thrived the same couldn’t be said of his relationship with his son Archie, who was a regular kid after a regular life, who just wanted to play and spend time with his dad. With his dad being so preoccupied with his factories, Archie’s unsupervised attempts of leading a normal life and wanting to win his father’s attention would inevitably lead to a variety of disasters.

It also didn’t help that despite being an obvious millionaire Lolly Pop was rather miserly to say the least, preoccupied with saving his wealth, leading to Archie being somewhat neglected. Although to be fair it was only attention that Archie felt starved of. Originally in Whoopee, Lolly Pop is one of the stronger series in this book and there are stories involving Lolly Pop Toffees Ltd, Lolly Pop Movie Studios, Lolly Pop’s Garage, Pop’s Tyres, Lolly Pop Wood Products and Lolly Pop’s Record Company over five 2-page strips.

“Ha! No playpen can hold Sweeny!”

Sweeny Toddler

To finish the review, there’s one perennial favourite that surely everyone loves no matter which generation they’re from. Another character appearing in new strips today, even illustrated by one of his original artists, Sweeney was the tearaway toddler who would cause havoc in not only his own home but all across town, with his ever faithful canine friend Henry by his side. Sweeney Toddler was originally created for Shiver and Shake comic and drawn by Leo Baxendale, then through mergers he’d go on to star in Whoopee, Whizzer and Chips and (of course) Buster.

There’s a reason Sweeney lasted as long as he did. Quite early on the brilliant Tom Paterson took over drawing duties and OiNK’s very own Graham Exton became Sweeney’s writer in the early 80s. They made the perfect team and during that time the strip rose to ever greater heights. The strip below is drawn by Tom but is before Graham. By the time Graham joined Tom’s style had developed to include all those lovely little sight gags he became synonymous with, like those in Strange Hill.

Overall, the first Big Comic Book is a success. Financially it was a huge success! It (and its fortnightly spin-of) cost next to nothing to produce since Fleetway owned the rights to all of the contents (we would never have seen any OiNK material as a result since most of it was creator-owned) and used cheaper paper stock, enabling the books to be much thicker with a retail price similar to a regular annual.

While some of the strips haven’t stood the test of time as well as others, there’s not really any that won’t at least raise a smile, making it a very pleasant reading experience. Needless to say, if you see this on eBay or in a second-hand charity store snap it up. With this amount of silly comics stuffed inside you should find plenty to keep you amused no matter your tastes.


It appears I jumped on to the OiNK train at the right moment back in 1986. Last time I shared the memories of my first issue and just one week later came a kind of soft relaunch as the theme. OiNK had established itself, publishers IPC Magazines were happy, the readers were happy and it was proving to be a success, so the team decided to celebrate by bringing in a whole bunch of brand new characters.

Let’s not forget the fantastic free gift, the first of three Ian Jackson posters which combined into one giant calendar for 1987 featuring The 8th Wonder of the World: Mount Rushboar. I can remember pouring over all the little details in the swarm of people running across Harry the Head and Burp the Smelly Alien carved into the rock face and even the little bits of rubbish left behind on this apparently reverential site. How typical of us humans and a funny swipe at British tourists in particular.

On page two we find out how this glossy comic could afford such extravagances, with staff reduced to working naked, cartoonists and accountants alike shivering in the cold as Uncle Pigg looks on, wearing his Hawaiian shirt to boot. Christmas was coming early for him with all the money OiNK was raking in, and it was coming early for us too because the calendar poster freebies would continue up to the first festive issue.

Mary Lighthouse (critic) is back with her strip on page three. Normally this would be a way of introducing the subject matter of the issue but here it’s quite clear it has a bigger job to do. It’s introducing new readers to the character and the overall irreverence of the comic. Thanks to writer Mark Rodgers and artist Ian Jackson it’s genuinely funny while also reinforcing the way the comic is reintroducing itself now that its readership is growing.

Coming on board just before this issue is probably the reason why I always assumed certain characters were in OiNK right from the beginning, when in reality this was their first appearance. Two such examples are Davy FrancisGreedy Gorb (He’d Eat Anything) and Jeremy Banx‘s wonderfully surreal and often very rude Hector Vector and his Talking T-shirt. The latter actually gets a proper origin story when a magical genie appears from Keith Disease‘s (I never remembered him having an actual name!) packet of crisps, but Keith is rude to him because his snack is gone. Poor Hector happens to be passing and Keith is forever confined to be a “tasteless print” on his t-shirt.

I remember his strip being one of my favourites so expect to see them at some point. The only reason I’m not including them here is because there’s just too much I could include that I had to leave some real classics out. But I was always going to show you the beginning of OiNK’s second spoof adventure story. Hot on the tails of The Street-Hogs comes Ham Dare: Pig of the Future, also stunningly illustrated by J.T. Dogg and this time the multi-part serial is written by Lew Stringer. IPC’s very own Eagle and 2000AD hero Dan Dare was the subject of OiNK’s style of parody, complete with sidekick Pigby and arch nemesis The Weakun‘!

This was my first exposure to J.T.’s artwork and it looked like nothing I’d ever seen before. Possibly because of this, as much as I love The Street-Hogs now, Ham Dare remains my favourite of all the OiNK serials. Lew’s script is fast-paced and packed full of gags, both for fans of the original space adventurer or those like me who weren’t that familiar. I especially love how Sir Hogbert has to show our heroes such a basic drawing to describe Earth being pulled out of orbit. Ham Dare may not be the sharpest pork scratching in the packet but he looked dashing as the hero and that’s what was important to him (and we loved him for it).

Elsewhere this issue Horace (Ugly Face) Watkins‘ own serial continues and a lot of the humour comes from the narrative by Tony Husband. Fan favourite Pete and his Pimple makes his debut after being the footer gag to a Tom Thug strip in #6. Hyperactive Harriet is the fastest girl in the world and a not-so-subtle take on The Beano‘s Billy Whizz. Then Billy Buzz gets the same ‘New Character’ treatment as the rest, but his saccharine personality annoys Uncle Pigg so much he swats him by the end of the strip and that’s the last we’d ever see of him!

Billy might not have made the grade but the next new addition certainly did. She quickly became a childhood favourite, so much so that I was certain she appeared in almost every issue I had as a kid. But surprisingly Psycho Gran was only in 20 editions of OiNK altogether including specials and annuals. Despite this, she became a true OiNK legend.

Created by David Leach (Brain Damage, Toxic Crusaders, Spongebob Squarepants) she was originally submitted as a one-off strip, so when OiNK’s editors introduced her as a new regular character in this issue it was a bit of a surprise for David. This explains why she doesn’t reappear until #21 because he hadn’t made any more! David tells me the guys would send him a list of upcoming issue subjects and he’d submit Psycho Gran strips for whichever ones he had an idea for. He never had a Psycho strip turned down and as a fan I can see why.

This one might look familiar to anyone who has purchased the new comic series from David in recent years because he reproduced this as a full colour strip. In fact, between contributions to Aces Weekly and Psycho’s own digital and print comics, David has now produced more work for the little old dear in the years since OiNK than during her time in her debut comic.

There are certain Psycho Gran strips, as well as individual jokes and images that stayed with me long after childhood was a distant memory. Whether she’s randomly throwing people into the ocean, making military preparations to pick her pension up at the Post Office or adorning a Wild West Wanted poster, she could terrify many in her little world but she was adored by pig pals.

“‘Sammy is getting old and worn out! I’ll have to replace him with a new engine,’ said the Controller.”

Sammy the Steam Engine

Two new characters are up on the next page together, namely Sally Scowl (Her Temper’s Foul!) and Fatty Farmer (He’s A Whole Lot Calmer). Their titles may have rhymed like so many traditional humour strips of the time but that’s where the similarities end. Both were written by Mark Rodgers (of course) and drawn by Dave Follows and Weedy Willy‘s Mike Green respectively.

Both are enjoyable, even if we do already have a bad tempered youth in the shape of Billy Bang. But unlike Billy, Sally’s temper builds until she uses it to her advantage at just the right moment. She’s a lovable character and after that hilarious first panel I can’t blame her for being in a bad mood all day! She was also that rare occurrence indeed, a black character in one of our childhood comics. So why does Sally disappear after #16, totalling only two appearances? So much for a new regular character! What a shame and a waste of a great idea.

The message was clear, don’t let the bullies get to you.

Fatty Farmer was a larger than life country man who’d often come up against bullies and small-minded individuals making fun of his weight. However, he’d remain chilled out and deal with them calmly, often proudly using the very thing they were laughing at to get his own back or to ignore them. The message was clear, don’t let the bullies get to you. He’d go on to be a bit more successful than Sally with 11 strips in total, appearing in every issue for the first few months and then on and off during the rest of the fortnightlies.

Back in #3 artist Ralph Shepherd drew OiNK’s brilliant take on The Transformers. As I said at the time, the comic would often take the hand out of the things we readers loved and for me there was nothing I loved more than the subject of this next strip. It was so funny to see this as a kid. This was really the first many fans of the show would’ve seen a spoof of it (and it was even several months before the official comic finally launched). Over the course of the two weeks I had to wait for my next OiNK I reread this several times, laughing and loving the fact OiNK had its own version of Thomas the Tank Engine & Friends.

Looking at this issue as a whole I can see I was clearly spoiled as a kid with this as only the second comic I ever bought. Whether I realised that at the time is another matter. I got to experience the gorgeous work of J.T. Dogg for the first time, got to meet lots of new characters including many who would become lifelong favourites, the subject of my top book series and TV show was given that unique OiNK makeover and then on top of all that was one of only five Tom Paterson OiNK strips, Mister Cheese! It even came complete with his trademark smelly sock and funny descriptions of other characters that have no bearing on the story whatsoever.

What a lovely surprise it was to come across this page when reading the issue for this review. Written by Mark Rodgers it’s already a funny script, but when it’s in the hands of Tom you just know there are going to be many more laughs added before he’s done with it. This would unfortunately be Tom’s final full page story for OiNK. After this his work would only pop up once more in a tiny quarter-page strip in The OiNK Book 1988, which I won’t be reviewing for another 13 months! Just as well this is so jam-packed with Tom’s trademark sight gags to keep us going. Tom was just too busy to be a regular contributor and that’s such a shame because I believe he and OiNK were the perfect fit, perhaps more so than any other comic he contributed to.

Before we wrap up with the back page, here’s a little bit of news about the next issue. While this edition may have introduced a wealth of new characters, #16 brings with it a true superstar, a megastar, a “fantastic” new addition to OiNK who I remember waking up to every Saturday morning on No.73. His creator sadly died back in 2010 and it was the news of his passing that brought me back into the sty after decades away. Next issue sees the start of his contributions which really have to be seen to be believed.

I’m definitely looking forward to the next issue. For now, I’m going to finish off with this full colour back cover from Lew Stringer. We got a glimpse on the Grunts page (at the top of this review) of what it was like to work in the OiNK offices. Uncle Pigg may have had all the right words to say to the readers but the reality behind them was somewhat different. Here’s Lew’s inside scoop on the real behind-the-scenes of creating the funniest comic ever produced!

According to Lew, the writer and artist in panel two getting whipped by Uncle Pigg are based on Mark Rodgers and Lew himself!

For a much younger me these two issues were a strong start. How could it possibly get any better? Be here on Monday 29th November 2021 to find out.


Off we go! Happy 35th anniversary to my very favourite comic of all time and what I truly believe is still the funniest to ever grace shop shelves. The preview issue released the week before had prepared some for what was to follow, but the actual premiere issue made quite the impact all by itself with a free record on the cover and a matching cover image to promote it. This could not have failed to catch the eye.

We’ll take a closer look at the free gift in a bit but first let’s start with editor Uncle Pigg taking no nonsense from critic Mary Lighthouse on page two. Written by Mark Rodgers and drawn by Ian Jackson, these strips were a regular fixture for many of the early issues and starting in #3 would introduce the fortnightly subject of each issue. These subjects would include your traditional Christmas and Hallowe’en editions, but could also be anything from music, computer games or pets, to space, health or war.

There’s no subject this time obviously but there’s certainly an edge to the first few pages. Our editor introduces strips such as Ed Banger, the boy with the invincible headbutt and Mike and Spike, the naughty boy with a mohican and his equally naughty pet hedgehog. Both were drawn by Patrick Gallagher, who also put the cover together. Very modern, very 80s characters, both feel like they were intended to be regular fixtures, but Ed would only return once and after appearing in the preview issue this was Mike and Spike’s last strip.

But that was one of the things we loved about OiNK, the forever changing line up of regular, occasional and one-off characters kept things fresh and exciting rather than formulaic and predictable. In fact, it’s only upon looking back on the series I realise some of my favourite regular characters weren’t regular at all. But one thing we could always count on were spoof advertisements.

The half-page Uncle Pigg’s For Sale Column mimicked the kind of thing we’d see in local newspapers, except here they’re all being sold by one person, or rather pig. A precursor to the infamous GBH catalogue company in later issues, here everything is poor quality for extortionate prices. I particularly like the couple of running jokes, the ‘Barrel of Monkeys’ and ‘Live Shark’ gags rolling over into subsequent, even funnier adverts.

It might seem strange to have the above as one of our first highlights of the premiere issue rather than a strip, but these were ubiquitous with OiNK. However, only a few page turns later a strip was set to astound the eyes of the young readers used to black and white or one-colour pages in their comics. The Street-Hogs were ready to make their grand entrance.

Written by one of the comic’s three creators/editors Mark Rodgers, who wrote so much of OiNK, it’s a spoof of classic Saturday morning television serials and their constant, increasingly ridiculous cliffhangers and even more ludicrous heroic escapes. However, inspiration could be traced back to everything from the 60’s Batman to Starsky & Hutch.

It was all brought to life by the incredible talent of illustrator J.T. Dogg who, while comic artists usually drew their pages at a larger scale which was then shrunk down during publication, created his pages at the same size as the finished product. Knowing this fact makes his beautiful colour work even more incredible in my eyes.

No wonder the The Street-Hogs are so fondly remembered to this day by so many pig pals

Dirty Harry, Emma Pig, Hi-Fat and their informant Hoggy Bear would fight against the butcher mafioso and find themselves in one escape-proof scenario after another for the first 11 issues, returning later for further serials. As well as being hilarious, Mark’s scripts also brought a real adventure vibe to things, albeit in suitable OiNK fashion. No wonder they’re so fondly remembered to this day by so many pig pals.

The premiere issue saw some returning characters from the preview such as Burp, Weedy Willy and chat show host Terry Wogham met The Invisible Man, and there was the second OiNK Superstar Poster as well. This time it was Bacon Stevens (I’m sure Shaky would’ve approved) and friend of the comic BBC Radio DJ John Peel also got the OiNK treatment. New addition Hadrian Vile would prove to be an instant hit and appear in almost every issue too.

One thing I particularly loved were the OiNK takes on children’s stories. We’d also get lots of cheeky digs at specific cartoons and toys but when OiNK took classic children’s book staples and created their own originals they were simply magical, and no pun is intended here.

Daz‘s The Wonderful Adventure of Billy Batt and his Magic Hat takes the idea of rhyming children’s stories, told in picture panels and captions, and illustrates it in what could be mistaken as a somewhat traditional fashion. That is, until you actually read it.

Daz (Dave Skillin) would contribute quite a few of these to the early issues of OiNK, each one starting off innocently enough, building anticipation in the reader. As I read them, I’m just waiting for that moment in each story when it starts to take a turn for the surreal, the comedic or the horrific. Then of course, they’re all capped off with a killer last line in the moral.

So, it’s time we talked about that free gift.

“Poo-poo, tinkle-tinkle, parp-parp, OiNK!”

Actual lyrics to The OiNK Song

Over a year later the team would bring us a record called The OiNK 45 which readers could buy through mail order. This is what I did back in 1987. It contained three songs, two of which had originally been on this special floppy flexidisc (although they were recorded and beefed up for The OiNK 45). Specially tuned to be enjoyed by young ears but excruciating for adult ones, The OiNK Song and The OiNK Rap were irritatingly catchy and I loved annoying my family with them at a volume they simply shouldn’t have been played at.

Along with silly dance moves (and alternative uses for the disc for those without record players) on a special double page spread were the lyrics. Whenever OiNK is brought up on some random social media chat it’s never too long before someone quotes the chorus of the song on the right!

Both were recorded by former member of The Fall, creator of Harry the Head and BBC Radio 6 Music presenter Marc Riley, The OiNK Song’s effect of multiple squeaky pigs being achieved by overdubs. Co-creator/co-editor Tony Husband produced some of the electric percussion for the rap song and, according to Tony recently, “that influenced Public Enemy and Run DMC and all those people Dr. Dre talks about as a major influence.”

To hear the full version of the songs I heard at the time you can check out the post all about The OiNK 45.

I’m very happy to see Tom Paterson return for the premiere issue after his Revenge Squad in the preview. Drawing another Pigg Tale written by Mark Rodgers, this strip makes the previous one look like a warm up. This is Tom without any of the constraints he had to work under elsewhere. It epitomises silliness and is chock-full of his trademark sight gags and background jokes. Take your time in reading this one.

Young hot dog salesman Jimmy Bung would save the world against a crazy array of villains by leaping into the nearest dustbin

I love all of the little incidental details such as the explanation of where Jonesy’s underwear came from, the sound effects and descriptive words used throughout and the obligatory bangers and mash. I even like his depiction of Uncle Pigg, even though by this time it was agreed he wouldn’t be a typical smelly pig. If Tom had been able to become a regular contributor his collection of strips by the end would’ve been second-to-none, but at least we can enjoy such brilliance as Testing Time.

One more highlight for this issue and it’s a rare colour outing for OiNK’s very own superhero. David Haldane contributed quite a few strips to the comic, including Hugo the Hungry Hippo and the dark humour of the Torture Twins. Rubbish Man was his main character, where young hot dog salesman Jimmy Bung would save the world against a crazy array of villains by leaping into the nearest dustbin and becoming the smelly superhero, with everything from cold custard to mouldy mashed potato at his fingertips. Quite literally.

Haldane’s style has changed somewhat from the preview; his outlines are chunkier, the panels are fuller and overall it’s a much bolder look. It’s all very random, like organised chaos, which suits the comic perfectly. I love it. From the gorgeous colour work to the handily bleeped out curse words, it’s the final strip of the issue and a great way to end things for now.

As first impressions go this has been a huge success and a joy to read from beginning to end. The sheer variety in the art styles alone was enough to make it stand out, but put those styles into genuinely funny strips, make them all different lengths, squeezing in as much as you possibly can to make use of every available space and print it all on extra large, glossy paper and what do you have? A comic like nothing else on the market. In other words, you have OiNK.

Issue two’s review will be here in a fortnight on Monday 17th May.