Category Archives: Comic Reviews

Aliens, Comic Reviews

ALiENS #16: A DAY iN THE MARiNE CORPS iS LiKE A DAY ON THE FARM

Leave a comment

This cover by Carl Critchlow (Thrud the Barbarian, Flesh, Batman/Judge Dredd) has got to be one of the best covers so far, encapsulating a moment with the twisted Doctor Cutlow character in the final chapter of our prose story, Tribes. So, only six issues to come after this one, eh? Yes, but calm down, that’s still half a year and a lot of aliens!

Editor Cefn Ridout mentions a sea-faring (“sea-scaring”) tale beginning next month and teases us about some other surprises to come. Colour me intrigued. After the editorial (included here so you have access to the full credits) we’re straight into the concluding half of Jim Woodring and Killian Plunkett’s superb Backsplash. After the cliff collapse there are only two Marines left, Gibbs and Crespi and these eight pages depict their desperate escape bid from the alien-infested cavern to their drop ship outside.

This is great fun! It’s also tense in all the right places which is quite the feat when we’ve gotten so used to seeing the aliens in comic form. Smacking an alien over the head with the limb of one of its fallen siblings, the pair make their way outside just before everything collapses around them. Not that this stops one of the aliens making a surprise reappearance to grab Crespi as they make a bolt for it.

Gibbs saves him only for things to take a turn for him. Hanging on to the ship’s entrance ramp he’s suddenly choking and an inner alien mouth bursts out of his own in a scary moment of synchronicity. His decapitated body falls to the ground as the ship takes off and a quick lever pull by Crespi opens the floor beneath the beast and, mirroring that earlier arm smack, poor Gibbs’ head is used in a moment of alien frustration!

This has been a brilliant little tale. Okay, so it’s light on plot and the characters are interchangeable with pretty much any Colonial Marine from the comic or movie, but through its sheer relentlessness and imaginative situations it’s a standout. But Kilian’s art is the main reason for its success in my eyes. His aliens are superbly detailed, his humans full of character even if the script doesn’t really call for it, and he heightens the horrific moments perfectly.

On to the news and I take issue with the Director’s Cut/Special Edition of a movie being referred to as “diluted”. Also, “already hailed as the best platform game for the Super Nintendo”? Really, Dave Hughes? Better than Mario? Better than Yoshi? The Alien³ game did very well across the board in all versions too, so I think maybe Dave owned a SNES. Ah, the days of unrivalled loyalty to a games platform. (For me it was still the C64 at this point.)

The game was notable for not following the plot of the film at all, with Ripley running around with a huge variety of weapons killing hoards of xenomorphs. Kind of defeats the purpose of having an Alien³ licence, no? At least she was bald! I still think a creepy platform game of stealth and a lack of weaponry with one alien roaming about would’ve been much better, like a 90s version of the more recent Alien: Isolation.

British strip Crusade begins with the Archbishop confronted by his suspicious followers, but he just keeps coming up with ludicrous excuses. “The wind whistling through broken stones” really placates people who’ve heard the alien Queen? Then our tribe and Minecorp marines are attacked by another tribe but the art is too messy to work out what’s going on. In the end the survivors continue on with their two horses into the sewers beneath London and now we can’t even see their hair colours in the dark, one of the few things we could use to tell characters apart. Suddenly their motion tracker starts to bleep and Rani’s spidey senses start to tingle. That can’t be good.

Back in the “big building for tiny minds” (as one of the Marines describes the church) it becomes clear that the Archbishop thinks he’s actually doing god’s work by keeping the alien threat contained within the tower via human sacrifices. But an attack and a hole in the wall recently saw some eggs roll down into the river, however he thinks if he keeps the aliens fed with outsiders they won’t leave their tower. In reality of course he’s just adding to their army.

The world building is potentially great but it’s that lack of visual clarity that’s just so frustrating. This issue’s chapter ends with one of the horses suddenly writhing in pain and an alien bursting from its chest, so the thrills and danger should be tangible but it just requires a bit too much effort for you to feel it.

One moment almost ruins the whole months-long story for me

Much better, as per usual, is prose story Tribes. This concluding chapter is, to use a clichéd phrase, a thrill ride. The whole place is rigged to explode any minute and Rat is stuck in a refuge unit with an alien climbing down through the rubbish. Bort realises he’s always loved her and risks his life to release the unit into deep space so she’ll finally be at peace, dead from the vacuum instead of being an alien incubator and reliving those nightmares of her childhood with her father.

In a tense moment she’s finally able to activate her oxygen supply and the story is left with her floating (alone, sans alien) in space. But one moment almost ruins the whole months-long story, for me anyway. The doctor of the religious extremists trying to help the aliens finds himself in an escape pod with a newborn Queen and a human baby. He was going to use this baby to feed the Queen but the baby dies in his arms slowly from a lack of oxygen.

Look, I know Alien is a horror franchise but I just felt this was an unnecessary use of a mental image of a dying baby to try to elicit an emotional response from the reader. It wasn’t needed and it cheapened all of the excellent work up to this point by writer Steve Bissette. Colton is also dying but knows the Queen will feed on him, providing her with sustenance until the pod lands and she can free herself. Tribes has been a real highlight and if it hadn’t been for that one moment I’d have been singing its praises for months to come.

The Technical Readout pages seem to have done away with the intricate technical cutaways, somewhat making the name of the feature redundant. While I do miss those earlier entries I have to say I really like this most recent one showcasing the military gear worn by two female Colonial Marines. There’s no credit anywhere for the artist, perhaps they were drawn by Lee Brimmincombe-Wood himself?

Our final strip is Colonial Marines and it’s been reduced in pages again after a bumper chapter last time but it’s still a meaty 12-page read. Leaving the sun gun they get distracted on the way to their main mission by a kelp bed on a planet that’s somehow keeping a comms channel open with the HQ they can’t reach, and on a planet that’s not meant to be inhabited. So off they go, with their bug man prisoner in tow.

Unfortunately, things don’t start off too well when the comic’s habit of printing errors sees spread above in the wrong order. The bug man is somehow able to produce the addictive alien slime we humans can’t get enough of and it’s handed around the marines like a drug. Meanwhile there’s an underlying current of distrust in Vasquez after her freak out as people begin to question whether they can rely on her to save their lives like they did hers. With less characters now we can begin to familiarise ourselves with some of the personalities in the ragtag team during these downtime scenes, instantly improving what was already a good strip.

Once they’re flying over the planet they spot an outpost where there shouldn’t be one and, once inside and cornered, they find out it belongs to the bug men. That of course means the aliens can’t be far away. The Marines attempted escape in the people carrier had the same music from the Hadley’s Hope escape scene in the movie playing over and over in my head as I read the end of this month’s chapter.

The cliffhanger sees their drop ship explode and now they’re stuck on this mysterious planet. Chris Warner’s story began as a fun take on the movie but little did I know that was only the starting point. I’m still not convinced about these bug men but given how much I’m enjoying the rest of it (at least they’re no longer 70s Doctor Who aliens) I have hope they’ll develop further too.

The Genre Gap is a strange little page, taking a long time to come to the conclusion we knew already that the Alien films are horrors. They just so happen to be set in a futuristic sci-fi setting, with a sci-fi entity as the main scare. When Stephen King says so is there really any need to question it? Then on the Bug Hunt letters page I’m not too sure about the name given to describe fans of fellow horror franchise, Predator!

There’s a healthy variety of places of origin for the readers this month. Back then it was rare to see letters in our comics from anywhere other than England. There also appears to have been a great deal of positivity for not only Tribes, but for the very idea of having a prose story in the comic, which I’m all for too. The sequel idea for an Alien 4 movie is just ridiculous… I mean, Madonna doing a movie song after that thing that I had to endure at the start of Die Another Day?!

Backsplash and Tribes may be over but that means more new stories next month which is always exciting. Colonial Marines continues to get better and better, and Crusade certainly has loads of potential that hopefully it can begin to fulfil. Even more excitedly there’s talk in this issue of a second autopsy feature (the first in #11 was fascinating) next month, this time for the alien eggs. Things can only get better, so be here in one month to check out Aliens #17.

iSSUE 15 < > iSSUE 17

ALiENS MENU

Comic Reviews, Dracula

DRACULA #10: VLAD THE SAD

Leave a comment

Esteban Maroto’s glorious cover gives the impression of a comic in rude health. Dark Horse International’s usual penchant for almost unreadable headlines hides what sounds like a particularly exciting issue for those that had stayed with Dracula this long after the association with the movie had ended. However, upon opening the issue we’re met with an editorial containing the round up of what’s happened in the main strip (instead of it being given its own page) and a “special message”.

Respect to editor Dick Hansom for telling the readers the truth rather than the next issue not appearing, something many comics in the 90s did, including DHI’s own titles. Although, he says readers can continue to read imported Topps Comics Dracula comics. Having researched these, alongside Vlad the Impaler (which concludes here) I can only find a Dracula Versus Zorro mini-series from the same year. Perhaps cancellation was the preferred option after all.

What Has Gone Before is part of the editorial to make room for the 28 pages of To Rise Again from the usual team of writer Roy Thomas, artist Esteban, colourist Paul Mounts and letterer John Costanza. It begins with Vlad beheading a King’s guard who tried to forcibly remove a thief from Castle Dracula who had begged for sanctuary. The guard insists the thief hadn’t asked permission. However, the guard also hadn’t before placing his foot across the threshold.

The King of Hungary, who had kept Vlad captive up until now, gives him an army to lead against the Turks, hoping Vlad’s viciousness will help him in his dire situation and lead to more impalements across the land. However,  another of the King’s allies, Stephen Bathory wants Transylvania as thanks for his own help and Vlad is left with Wallachia, which he becomes ruler of again after his younger brother, Prince Radu dies of syphilis. 

On a few occasions Vlad’s narration laments his own decisions, defending himself by reminding us he was only human at the time. For example, he didn’t know he had only two months left to live and wishes he’d made better choices, in particular with his family; he’s now married to the King’s cousin, they have two children and are in love as opposed to his previous wife who he’d forced into a relationship.

He realises his enemies (and allies) are amassing against his bloodlust and he takes drastic measures. He orders all of his wealth be amassed before leaving for a secret destination. Even his loyal assistant Cazan is left behind. Vlad shows a surprising amount of love for the man in these moments, telling the reader he was hurting because he’d left his friend with the wrong impression. You see, once all his worldly goods were buried (in an area where he’d dammed a river, then released the water again to hide the burial site) he impaled everyone involved. He didn’t want to have to kill his friend too.

But he would’ve.

Someone claiming their village was destroyed by Vlad’s enemies comes to swear allegiance and, despite Cazan’s vocal suspicions, the man is allowed to join the army in a top advisory role. Vlad admits to the reader he had his own doubts but in a moment of “grim fatalism” he took in “a suspected viper to my bosom”. We’re reaching the end here. In the build up to the final battle against his hated foe, Danesti he’s unsurprisingly betrayed and Cazan takes a knife to the chest as he leaps to Vlad’s defence. Even though Vlad is also killed, his narration continues from beyond the grave and it’s here that the story goes on a tangent from known history. 

Beheaded by the assassin, after the battle is over pious monks take his body to be honoured by the Catholic church, which praises what this monster of a man achieved in the name of Christianity. However, that night the chapel is destroyed by a wild, unforeseen storm. This leads many of the faith to believe he’ll never be allowed to rest in peace because of what he did in life.

That was only his body, though. His head gets its own story. It was taken to Mehmed the Conqueror. However, over the course of just one night it becomes so badly decomposed it’s no longer recognisable to the people who come to see it impaled on a spike. We also find out that Vlad’s illegitimate son, Mihnea became known for terrorising the lands, cutting off the noses and lips of his enemies, with Vlad’s narration full of pride for the next Prince of Wallachia.

We then suddenly jump forward 150 years and a hooded stranger (actually a descendant) arrives at the church where Vlad’s decapitated body is buried; on orders from the Pope it is to be moved because it was buried too close to the altar. There’s a mention of Vlad’s wife’s suicide damning her for all eternity, which should be at least a bit familiar to fans of the film. However, unlike his supposed head a century-and-a-half earlier Vlad’s body hasn’t decayed.

After the spread above, his actual head (which we learn is not decomposed either) is placed on to his body, the stranger recites some ancient texts in a foreign language and Vlad rises again, instantly biting the neck of his descendant, energising his body and beginning his life as a vampire. While the story ends with an image of him declaring himself as the Dracula of Bram Stoker’s creation this origin story, even the resurrection part, is very different from the novel. In fact, it’s only one of a few possible stories about Vlad’s body after he died.

This has been a curious strip. We know that Stoker had very limited knowledge of Vlad the Impaler, that particular part of the world or indeed that point in history and he simply picked at scraps of information to build his character. (Not forgetting his own supposed xenophobia which may have contributed to the story.) This strip seems to dangle somewhere between actual history and the novel. After accurately chronicling the historical character (as much as a comic can), this final chapter commits itself to neither the truth nor Stoker’s imagination.

There’s a lot of ambiguity surrounding the events of his burial so Roy has decided to fill in the gaps as he saw fit, and that’s fair. Personally though, I’d have preferred to have had the mystery remain. It could’ve still ended with how it began four months ago, with Dracula relaying the story to the reader and letting them fill in the blanks. The mystery could’ve added to the spookiness, the unknown adding to the fear instead of it being filled in for us.  Overall though, I’ve really enjoyed it and it’s peaked my interest in the real life man. I’ve found myself reading about him at length because of this comic.

It’s a shame the sales figures dropped so sharply after the adaptation finished, although I’m not sure what they could’ve printed anyway. This last issue also sees Vampirella unceremoniously dumped (she never did get her own cover as promised) and the small back up strip is rather unremarkable. But I wanted to concentrate on the main story anyway.

Overall this has been a quality comic and a pleasant surprise from start-to-finish. From a brilliantly realised movie adaptation to a fascinating look at the man behind the myth. From an initially clichéd Vampirella origin to a captivating story and character I’d never read before. From interesting news on the film’s release to a series of remarkable anthology back up strips. I didn’t expect too much from what was essentially a movie tie-in, but Dark Horse International’s Dracula has been a great read from start to finish, including when changing form like its titular character.

It may not be well remembered and doesn’t sell for very much on eBay, but that just means it’s easy for you to pick up and enjoy for yourselves. I highly recommend that you do.

BACK TO iSSUE NiNE

DRACULA MENU

Comic Reviews, Transformers: Generation 2

TRANSFORMERS GENERATiON 2 #12: THE EPiLOGUE ENDS

2 Comments

This review was due on Sunday 31st August
but was delayed due to a health issue

This is the last we’ll see of Derek Yaniger’s wonderful art on the blog. The final edition of Marvel US’ Transformers: Generation 2 has 48-pages with 37 of strip broken down into chapters of varying length called Judgement, Twilight, Siege and Creation. All written by Simon Furman, coloured by Sarra Mossoff and lettered by Richard Starkings, with alternate chapters drawn by either Manny Galan and Jim Amash or Geoff Senior, making it feel even more special. The annoying adverts breaking the up strip are also limited, with the final 17 pages left as one long chunk.

Things kick off with something I enjoy but which seems to irk the all-too-ready-to-criticise folks when another movie drops. I don’t like retcons if we have to ignore previous storylines in order to make them work, but unlike some I’ve never thought that about the films. Instead, just like the G1 comic which (and this is not a complaint) was made up as it went along, I enjoy a storyline that adds background, depth and builds upon what we thought we knew. This is what has happened with the G2 comic. At least, until the final page anyway.

So our memories have been refreshed about the ‘evolution’ of these mechanical beings and Simon’s clever way of integrating the comic’s necessary name change into the story, then there’s some surprisingly good comedy as Starscream finds himself battling with his own consciousness. His natural desire to conquer is in a losing battle with the power of the Autobot Creation Matrix and he finds himself unwillingly saving the lives of others. Hilariously he’s never anything other than the Starscream we all know and love to hate, and he hates every moment of it! Eventually he relents and passes the Matrix back to Optimus Prime like a child forced to give up their toy until they’ve eaten their dinner. This is a brilliant swan song for him.

Moving on to book two and Geoff’s easily recognisable style instantly elevates an already enjoyable story. We find out The Swarm is something “between matter and energy” and we witness it destroying a battleship, killing its 16,000 troops in seconds. It falls on Megatron of all characters to bring some levity to the proceedings. He’s a far cry from the megalomaniacal ranter in G1, continuing his entertaining line in dark quips from last issue.

The two leaders have a plan but it’s not revealed yet, leaving us to enjoy the tension as things continue to worsen. After years of knowing these characters it’s fascinating watching Megatron go about something with all of his usual verve while treating Prime as his equal. Speaking of Optimus, he senses some form of intelligence within The Swarm and believes if he can reason with Jhiaxus he can contact it on some form of psychic level through one of the second generation. Given the twists and turns and shocks the original comic gave us over seven years, it would really take something to shock us by this stage, right? Correct.

There’s some gloriously detailed art here, some of Geoff’s finest in fact. Could a shock conclusion see the end of Optimus? No, that’d be too easy. Instead he’s forced to fight through the pain and the temptation to give up and simply pass away. This gets dark at times. But in the end it plays to the strength of this character.

It feels less like a sequel and more like an epilogue to the original epic 332+ issue run

As far as Jhiaxus is concerned the original generation of Transformers have compassion and empathy, and he believes caring about those other than yourself (or indeed for those worse off than you) is a weakness and must be torn out. In the end it’s the Swarm that gets him, tearing him apart in a burst of agony and the ship’s reactor blows, pushing Prime into space and leaving Megatron as the last hope for both Autobot and Decepticon alike.

The Rheanimum he mentions is the mineral his Decepticons mined in #7 and here it’s explained it could be the key to their survival. It makes metal super dense and resistant to damage, you see. It’s exciting to see Megatron racing to save everyone, even if Earth continues to look like any barren bit of space rock. Why not set the story somewhere recognisable like G1 did, even just a named place (like Portland in the original). It takes away any potential drama of having this happen on our own planet.

The characters make up for this though. I mean, come on, seeing Grimlock and Soundwave side-by-side is something else! Then new Decepticon Manta Ray hears Razorclaw’s orders but looks to Grimlock before following them. That’s the final straw for the Predacon, who attempts to kill his brother in arms but Autobot Leadfoot saves the Decepticon. We’ve had moments of truce between the factions before in comics, cartoons and movies, but it feels so much bigger, more impactful and more permanent this time.

Then everything happens at once! Starscream saves Prime and hands him Rhanianimum, but he refuses it. There’s even a reference to the Scraplets by Starscream, who spends a lot of time worrying his co-operation isn’t like him and that the Matrix has done him permanent damage! Frenzy gets some funny moments, Nightbeat dies (nooooo!) and Megatron politely introduces himself to Grimlock. Then Prime insists that for his desperate plan to work, he must die. Thing is, while it tears his physical body apart, the Swarm doesn’t kill him. Instead he ends up in a void, seemingly forgetting he was in a void before in the UK comic (Furman annoyingly ignoring his own UK continuity), and he gets the feeling the Swarm is like an innocent child clamouring to be taught.

This review was almost twice as long as it is because there’s so much going on in this issue. I’ve had to edit this post down and cut so much out I could get a job on Film4’s daytime schedule team. So, Prime wants to let the Swarm take him, absolutely and completely, letting it consume him and fulfilling his visions which began way back in #1. The nightmares weren’t to be feared, they were instructions. The ultimate sacrifice. It’s portrayed brilliantly by Geoff above and you can feel the agony Prime goes through.

Then there’s darkness… before he suddenly sees, well, everything!

He sees and feels everything the Swarm does. While he still has a consciousness the Matrix sustains his mind and uses the pure essence of their creator Primus to educate the Swarm. From the outside its misshapen form becomes a dazzlingly bright light and all who witness it are filled with a feeling of peace and joy, their fear dissolving in an instant. Then, out of the light steps a new creation, the Swarm now knowing what it is and where it’s come from, and it uses its immense power to create instead of destroy.

The Optimus Prime you see below is based on the ‘Hero’ version of the toy, the most recent plastic incarnation of him at the time. But what exactly was the Swarm? The whole “byproduct of the second generation of Transformers” is never fully explained. How was it produced in the first place? We don’t know. (Nor do we get an answer about that strange moment with Onslaught.) What is explained is that the second generation of Transformers lacked any kind of morality, just a legacy of destruction and, like a child, the Swarm was searching for something more. It knew it wanted something better and was destroying all Transformers because it thought they were all fascist killers; it didn’t know there was an earlier generation or why the species had been created in the first place (to fight evil and save the universe).

Exposed to the original Primus ‘code’ it’s reprogrammed and from the lives it took it constructed a new life, a new leader for a new future for their whole race, not just the Autobots. The story ends with what feels like both sides genuinely wanting to work together. It certainly feels a lot more permanent than the truce at the end of the 80s cartoon movie. Then, after months of wondering we’re finally introduced to the Leige Maximo. This is the one bit of the whole issue that I’m not sure about.

These will forever sit at the end of my original Marvel UK collection as an integral part of that lifelong favourite

The thought of the comic continuing beyond this resolution is an exciting prospect, with the Transformers (no longer Autobots and Decepticons) fighting a new war together against this new foe. However, the Decepticons weren’t a separate race, they were an offshoot who’d had enough of how things were being run. I hope Simon would have eventually interwoven this new backstory in with what came before if the comic had continued. However, I’m more annoyed with Megatron being sidelined in the final pages for Prime’s speech when he should’ve been standing shoulder-to-shoulder with him.

I had no expectations of this sequel, especially since there were only 12 issues. But what a rush! Some complained it retconned things (much like we constantly hear from moaners about the live-action movies, Star Wars or Doctor Who… etc.) but surely things would be boring if we knew everything there was to know about characters right from the off. This comic felt like an elaboration of what came before, using the millions of years between their leaving Cybertron and arriving on Earth to its advantage. It was a gap of four million years after all! It was also a clever way of working in the toy line’s new name, so kudos one final time to Simon for that.

Before we finish up completely, there are a couple of the usual extras to cover. After acknowledging G.I. Joe’s 150th edition, the final issue of this spectacular comic isn’t given any such coverage on the Bullpen Bulletin news page, however the letters page is rather unique. It takes up more space and begins with a missive from letterer (and Marvel UK editor) Richard Starkings. It’s interesting but I must point out the UK Transformers comic lasted a lot longer than 250 issues (332 plus annuals, specials etc) and I happen to love his Dragon’s Claws logo!

The second letter reminds me of my mum’s confession later in life that she didn’t actually mind buying me comics as a child, the letter from OiNK Blog reader James Healy asks us to remain positive before being negative about the original comic’s ending (I must say I disagree with him on this), and in Simon’s farewell message there’s an interesting snippet that it was colourist Sarra Mossoff who decided the idents in speech balloons should be coloured to match the speaker. Unfortunately, she’s also the victim of a rather cringey description.

Below this are some unused pieces of art by Derek and a Decepticon image by Chia-Chi Wang (The Punisher, Ren & Stimpy, G.I. Joe). Whether these were unused covers/posters is unclear and I wish they were bigger. I know the issue already has more pages, but a few more so we could see these at their full size would’ve really added to what has been a great send off.

During this real time read through I found out the name ‘Jhiaxus’ is pronounced “gee, axe us”, an in-joke by Simon who anticipated a quick cancellation by Marvel of another toy comic. He wasn’t wrong. While it was designed to last much longer, I haven’t felt short-changed. Yes, it was obvious things were being ramped up to get to a suitable conclusion but I’m left feeling completely satisfied, and not just with this as an end to its own series.

Now that it’s over it feels less like a sequel and more like an epilogue to the original epic 332+ issue run, like this was a story that had always occurred and just needed to be told before we could properly say goodbye to these original versions of beloved characters. Characters who have been reinvented many times since. As such, this hasn’t felt like a short run but an addition to the longest running comic I’ve ever collected, and these will forever sit at the end of my original Marvel UK collection as an integral part of that lifelong favourite.

Still didn’t need to kill Nightbeat, though.

BACK TO iSSUE 11

TRANSFORMERS: GENERATiON 2 MENU

MAiN TRANSFORMERS MENU

Aliens, Comic Reviews

ALiENS #15: THERE’S MOVEMENT ALL OVER THE PLACE!

Leave a comment

This review was due on Tuesday 26th August
but was delayed due to a health issue

Well that’s one competition I wouldn’t have been entering. Anyway, Irish artist Killian Plunkett returns with this great cover for #15 of Dark Horse Intertnational’s Aliens as well as the first strip. One of the headlines on the cover notes the similarities in subject matter for two of the tales, something I’d noticed previously. The cover is printed on lovely glossy paper once more, which is highlighted by editor Cefn Ridout in the editorial, shown below to include all of the credits in the review.

He also mentions extra pages but in reality the comic has returned to its original page count. Perhaps in light of the cancellation of both Star Wars and Dracula there were a few extra pence in the pagination budget? Cefn welcomes Killian to the Aliens fold for the first time even though he’d previously drawn the even better cover to #8 (and Dracula #7) and I do like his answer to the question of whether the Colonial Marines will ever learn. He’s right, you know.

Proof comes in the form of part one of Backsplash, an American story written by Jim Woodring (The Book of Jim, Frank, Star Wars) with Killian as artist that was originally printed in Dark Horse Comics over there. It follows a team of marines as they try out a new eco-suit weapon in an alien hive, something they believe is so good the aliens will no longer be a threat. Of course, such talk is always going to jinx us humans in the Alien universe! The leader’s name is Gibbs, so maybe he can slap the marine who said that across the back of the head.

That’s basically it for the plot and things go wrong even more quickly than I anticipated, as the aliens swarm the two marines sent out in the suits. To begin with the particle-plasma projectors see off the xenomorphs easily, exploding their bodies at a safe distance. But then the aliens gang up and such a large amount of them exploding at once produces a wave of acid that instantly starts to eat through the suits. Even worse, it covers the transport holding the rest of the team, dissolving its armour and filling the interior with deadly fumes.

As they try to escape the surviving aliens attack, the extra weight leading the cliff edge they were parked on (because of course they were) to crumble, taking everyone with it. A prequel to a strip called Labyrinth, don’t expect to get to know any of the characters in this short story but it’s a fun little tale nonetheless that once again shows the universe humbling humanity. Great art on the part of Killian too, it feels like stills from an ace Aliens cartoon.

Part 3 of Michael Cook’s Crusade is reduced to 9 pages but it continues its positive ascent through the ranks of the stories after a rather dodgy beginning. The Minecorp mercenaries are imprisoned by the tribe’s leader, who accuses them of kidnapping those taken last time, despite the fact the mercenaries are still there. Go figure. But tribeswoman Rani isn’t convinced. She can see in the stones they aren’t the monsters of her visions and wants to go with them to find their lost people.

More world building is included when Britain is simply called ‘an unnamed mining island off the coast of Europe’. (I could make a dig about Brexit here but you’ve probably beaten me to it.) We also briefly see the Archbishop either tearing chunks out of the dead Beresford or stitching him up as the Alien Queen watches on, it’s unclear what he’s doing as the art remains too messy for me personally.

However his followers, who live in the abbey and never venture outside, are beginning to question his King-like leadership. They’ve heard tales of kidnappings, are suspicious of Bereford’s death and want to know what’s really in the tower. The Archbishop simply says doubts are the devil’s work and walks off. That won’t come back to haunt him, I’m sure. Back at the camp a rather basic escape plan is put in motion as Rani smuggles an electrical cutter inside the prisoners’ food like some clichéd cartoon.

Once free some of the mercs are all too ready to kill their captors, setting up some tense character dynamics within the group. However, the strip now suffers from that 90s action flick syndrome of a lack of clothing. As the tribes took the troopers’ clothes and they themselves wear only basic coverings, what Rani brings as their disguises is little more than an excuse for some tits and ass. A shame, there’s real depth within the story so it doesn’t need to do this.

I was looking forward to this month’s Technical Readout and the next part in the Sulaco series but instead it’s about the drop ship that took the marines down to the planet in the film. Actually, it’s not even about that, it’s a rather bland two pages about the individual missiles it could fire. Much more exciting was the realisation Chris Warner’s Colonial Marines strip had doubled in size to 16 pages. We were told it’d be a few more months until this happened so it’s a nice surprise.

This moment perfectly captures their panic, the claustrophobia and the ensuing tension.

This strip has been gagging to breathe a bit more in each issue. Each chunk has been really enjoyable but they’ve been over so quickly, partly because of the amount of pages but also because of the speed of the action, so the plot hasn’t really had a chance to shine. This changes somewhat here so I hope this is an ongoing change.

However, first up is this comic’s constant problem of giving things away in the round up of the story so far, with the writer of that page stating certain things have happened already when they haven’t. The reveal of the new alien species actually being a hybrid between humans and xenomorphs is spoiled before I even get to the strip.

How the characters can tell they’re hybrids is unknown, it certainly wasn’t clear to me. The man they found Newt-like in the air ducts tells them the hostiles are men “but bugged out”. Meanwhile, corporation man Beliveau is screaming at the huge synth that he’s built for alien encounters, only to be told by the synth they’ll have to wait for the team to re-establish contact because he costs too much to risk going in.

Beliveau’s inner thoughts betray him to the reader. He thinks he knows who’s responsible and in the hive the “Father” figure tells his men, “The Judas is here”, so there’s more to the company man. The main highlight of not only this strip but the whole issue is their escape up a zero-g well to an air lock. This moment, portrayed over the two spreads I’ve photographed, perfectly captures their panic, the claustrophobia and the ensuing tension.

Having one panel with all the captions displayed vertically is a nice touch too, highlighting the disorientation of being in zero-gravity. They manage to take one of the hybrids prisoner but all he does is lecture them about humanity polluting space and how The Father believes the aliens are cleansing it for the greater good. There’s an environmental message in there somewhere that I’m sure James Cameron would be proud of.

“The alien behind Point struck, its extended tongue tearing effortlessly through the helmet’s metal to taste the soft grey yolk that lay under the bone.”

Tribes, Steve Bissette

The new Q&Aliens feature takes individual questions asked in letters and gives them prominence in a double-page spread. There’s nothing particularly groundbreaking in any of the questions asked, although we do get to see these two interesting early designs for the original movie’s poster, complete with different fonts. Both were created by David Pelsue.

The questions may be of the usual sort but one answer stood out. A clearly frustrated reader wanted to know “Where the **~!” the facehuggers came from at the beginning of Alien³. I always thought it was obvious, the Queen had been hiding out on the drop ship so she planted them. Interestingly, the answer states the sound of an alien egg schlopping open could be heard at the very end of the credits to Aliens, director James Cameron indicating an egg was on board the EEV with the survivors (or perhaps just to freak out the audience a bit). I had to go and give it a listen and yep, it’s there! I’d never heard it before!

Tribes’ penultimate chapter (written by Steve Bissette) somehow escalates the heart-pumping excitement even more than it already had. Things are certainly shaping up for a heart-stopping climax next issue. My favourite character Rat may not be as prominent but it hardly matters because everything else happening around her has been dialled up. The shrunken images by Dave Dorman should still give you an idea of the action taking place here.

While we’re used to things going wrong in an Alien story, the fact absolutely everything (including things you’d never think could go wrong) goes wrong makes this a shocking read. Quite the feat. There are a lot of surprising deaths, Shitkicker goes on a rampage and the more things go wrong the more his metal shell injects drugs into him to combat the escalating situation, which of course just makes things worse. As the marines now fight their own amongst the aliens I was almost breathless by the end of the four pages. What a thrill ride!

What an issue. Aliens is back on top of its game! All four stories were a thrill to read this month. Backsplash is incredibly fun hokem, Crusade continues to develop something very interesting, Colonial Marines was just superb and Tribes… wow! There’s even mention on the letters page of a possible Technical Readout book, which I searched for and I found it. That’ll be a future purchase for the blog, no doubt. With two finales next month there’s every possibility #16 could (somehow) be even better than this issue. We’ll find out on Tuesday 23rd September 2025.

iSSUE 14 < > iSSUE 16

ALiENS MENU

Comic Reviews, Dracula

DRACULA #9: VLAD THE MAD

Leave a comment

So much for the Vampirella cover. We were told last month there’d be one and I assumed it would be a classic reprint, what with the comic’s cancellation at #10 decided but there being a need for an extra cover this month, the second half of an American strip taking the lead position inside (and they probably didn’t want to pay out for a new cover for a cancelled comic). But instead, #9 of Dark Horse International’s Dracula has this very basic (it feels rushed) cover by Woodrow Pheonix, letterer on Crusade in Aliens.

Lying to people about “sovereignty” and “losing control” in order to gain power… that wouldn’t happen today, surely?

On the editorial page we’re told the next issue will include a “feature-length” chapter of Vlad the Impaler to finish off this real-life prequel strip. With hindsight we know this was because it would be the final issue. At least they knew ahead of time so they had the chance to properly finish off the imported Topps Comics strip. First up, this penultimate issue contains the next 16 pages of chapter two, as ever written by Roy Thomas, drawn by Esteban Maroto, coloured by Paul Mounts and lettered by John Costanza.

The mass murdering Vlad has allied himself with Christianity while his enemy Mehmed the Conqueror allies himself with none other than Radu, Vlad’s younger brother. The plan is to annex Wallachia and install Radu as the Prince. Radu promises the people sovereignty of their country but only if they back him. Lying to people about “sovereignty” and “losing control” in order to gain power… that wouldn’t happen today, surely?

After losing a series of battles, Vlad pleas with other countries to come to his aid but to no avail. However, this doesn’t stop his Religious Crusade as he slices across Europe killing thousands in the name of the Christian god, the people suffering as a result. “My poor peasants moaned at their loss,” a caption upon an image of the slaughtered poor says. “But commoners cannot appreciate the measures a besieged Prince must take on their behalf.” Those who ignore history are doomed to repeat it, as they say.

Instead of helping diseased peasants he uses them, sending them into other countries and military troop gatherings to infect and weaken them. His callousness and self-interest drive the story and I must say it’s compulsive reading, even if everything about him disgusts me. His tactics look like they could be working until a mis-timed attack fails and only serves to rouse Mehmed from his complacency, putting Vlad on the back foot and leading to a desperate, horrifying action.

Originally intending to take Wallachia by force, The Forest of the Impaled shocks Mehmed into retreating for the first time, leaving Radu behind to become Prince on his own. Elsewhere, we find out the woman Vlad captured and forced to be his “love” is now named ‘Transylvania’. He describes her as being, “Near at hand, yet some part of her forever unattainable, uncontrollable”. This is very different to Mina. This woman is a slave, forced into a physical relationship with the Prince. An arrow does bring a message that ends with her suicide but as you can see it’s not a message from an enemy lying about the death of her one true love.

Instead, the thought of her horrible existence becoming even worse is the reason she takes her own life. This tears Vlad apart and he leads his pitiful army to Hungary and an ally, but the Hungarian leader has no stomach for war. Instead, through a convoluted pretence he separates Vlad from his troops and imprisons him, albeit in a palace! Forged letters are sent to all of his allies and enemies telling them he’s back on the side of the Sultan. With this news and his lonely existence he slowly goes crazy.

The cliffhanger is dreadfully forced. We know where this particular retelling of history will end up and I think it would’ve been more suspenseful to just finish it with him in his crazed state. The battles are also beginning to become much of a muchness but Vlad’s overall arc and the elements that (sadly) mirror politics in our modern world are fascinating. The final chapter should be interesting.

The Bloodlines news pages are light on much of interest, however Sound Bites does quote the legendary Christopher Lee who of course played Dracula earlier in his career (although to me he’ll always be Scaramanga). Such a shame his quote shows up the fact that he either hadn’t seen the film or wasn’t paying attention, as he attributes Anthony Hopkins to the title role. Whoops.

The second and final part of Vampirella: Death’s Dark Angel is shorter than last time but packs a lot in. With no blood substitute she knows she’ll not be able to control her urges and she’ll end up feeding on Wade. But this is just what he wants, so she continues to fight against it. Adam and Conrad Van Helsing are also in the cell and she finds herself opening up to the younger of the two (Conrad was knocked unconscious by Wade). However, having been shot, Adam collapses and the blood from his wound forces some primal instinct inside Vampirella. She breaks free of her chains but as she’s about to feast on her new ally she sees his face and with all her strength pushes back against the urge.

Of course this is when Conrad awakens and for the umpteenth time he gets the wrong idea and tries to kill her, but ends up killing the corrupt cop as he enters their cell and Adam and Vampirella let him believe he’s staked her instead. I like Adam and I understand part of his likability comes from the predicament he’s found himself in between his dad and a good vampire, but Conrad is just an annoying caricature by this point. Even Von Goosewing wasn’t this inept in Count Duckula! And why can he no longer sense her like he did before?

The demon, Skaar attacks the Helsings then suddenly just disappears. This is because Wade has finally forced the starving vampire to bite him! But as Skaar explains, Vampirella isn’t from Earth; she’s an alien, and her race can’t transform people, only kill them. It turns out Skaar was originally a human, namely Wade’s father! Having spent many years as a demon serving penance for his own life, he wasn’t serving Wade. Rather, he was merely waiting for his son’s death because only a soul blacker than his own could take his place and finally release him from his demonic prison.

This was a surprise ending! It’s solemn and moving before becoming horrifying on the final page, although Wade deserves everything he gets. However, does this mean Vampirella did kill the man on the plane? I assumed before the serum she could take what she needed without killing. A question for another time. I hope we get one final outing for her in the final issue. (UPDATE: We do not.) Given how she’s dressed I’ve been surprised at how maturely written and interesting the stories have been, eradicating my initial misgivings.

This month’s author interview is with Kim Newman so that promised series of female authors is disappointingly dead in the water. I remember Newman as a film reviewer on TV back in the 90s and I never liked him. To me, he was the kind of clichéd reviewer who thought they were right and everyone else was wrong and this plays out in this interview with the comic’s Dave Hughes.

Kim’s novel, Anno Dracula is a sequel to the original book set in an alternate world where Dracula wasn’t killed by Van Helsing, instead wooing Queen Victoria and carrying out his dastardly plan to turn England into a kingdom of vampires. He wooed Victoria? What about Mina? Kim admits he mainly used other authors’ fictional characters (Sherlock Holmes, Dr. Jekyll etc.) in the book, yet at the same time criticises other Dracula sequels for copying moments from the original book! That’s a bit rich. He also calls everyone who didn’t like his book “fat anoraks”. So yep, he’s definitely the person I remember.

Much more interesting is a look at the Mega-CD game of the film. We were promised last month (and on the contents page of this issue) a review of the game but instead it’s very much a reworded press release compiled by Amiya Lopez, complete with a guide to what a Mega-CD actually was for the uninitiated. The last sentence of the main article kind of gives it away that they hadn’t actually played it.

I’ve very fond memories of that time, of reading those first years of Edge magazine and getting excited at the sudden leaps in videogame technology. While I personally invested in a Panasonic 3DO (and loved it), I have a fondness for most of the tech from that time and the constant add-ons for the Sega Mega Drive always fascinated me. They’re very much of their time and I enjoyed this little look at a game I’d never seen before, even if it was apparently terrible.

To round up, despite hindsight telling us the editorial writer knew cancellation was on the way, the letters page still asks readers to write in with suggests of how they’d like the comic to evolve over the coming months. They were in for a shock four weeks later, and not of the good kind. We’ll see how things are (hopefully) wrapped up on Sunday 14th September 2025.

iSSUE EiGHT < > iSSUE TEN

DRACULA MENU

Comic Reviews, Transformers: Generation 2

TRANSFORMERS GENERATiON 2 #11: PRiMUS HELP PRiME!

Leave a comment

Well, this bold Derek Yaniger cover for #11 of Marvel US’ Transformers: Generation 2 would certainly have stood out on the shelves. And at least Starscream’s teeth are suitably horrifying instead of comically human-like for once. Simon Furman’s Dark Shadows (pencilled by Manny Galan, inked by Jim Amash, coloured by Sarra Mossoff, lettered by Richard Starkings) begins with the traitorous Decepticon in a seemingly unstoppable position on the Warworld ship.

In fact, as the story develops we (and he) find out that he’s no longer simply on the ship, he is the ship! The Matrix has afforded him the power to meld with it, morphing corridors and walls and trapping the newly aligned Optimus Prime and Megatron is his grasp. Does he instantly kill them? Of course not, he has to boast and gloat first.

One of Jhiaxus’ troops by the name of Rook is concerned about his commander’s obsession with tracking down the Autobots and Decepticons. He’s seen this side of him before, back when he was the tyrant that Jhiaxus himself lamented ever being back in #3. Rook worries that Jhiaxus is somehow regressing evolutionarily and so decides he must speak with Leige Maximo. Finally! Well, next month it’ll be “finally”, as this is the only mention of the unknown character this issue.

Prime explains to Megatron how the Matrix has become corrupted by evil once more, much like it did with Thunderwing back in the Matrix Quest epic in the G1 comic. Between this and the ongoing similarity between the Starscreem here and the Starscream during writer Bob Budiansky’s Underbase Saga several years prior, this usually highly original comic feels like it’s slipping back into familiar territory. But then this happened…

I’ll readily admit that if I hadn’t been holding this comic with both hands as I read it I’d have punched the air triumphantly upon seeing Megatron save Optimus Prime! Both were being flooded down a large vent, at the end of which is a huge fall into the plasma core of the ship. Megatron is able to stop himself and I fully expected him to let Prime fall, not out of hatred but because he’d be too busy saving himself. The fact he puts his own life at risk to save him and calls out to Prime to trust him reminds me very much of Transformers One.

The fact this comic was decades before that film just adds to the excitement and this must’ve been a huge moment for readers at the time. He can’t hold him for long though, so they agree he’ll swing him off to the side where Prime can grab hold of some dangling cables. But their plan doesn’t work. At least not as they intended. Prime misses the cables but then they move by themselves into a new position! The comic tries to play this out as a mystery, I guessed it was the Matrix. Was I right?

Ol’ Megs continues to get some of the best lines, like when he transforms into his tank mode to get himself free of the previous predicament and comes out with a perfect 90s action movie line, below. Optimus’ inner thoughts show an admiration for what he sees as Megatron’s instinctive and unselfish tactics, and he wishes this could be more than a mere alliance of convenience. This is a real revelation, to see these two characters in such a fresh way even all these decades later.

Prime then discovers the ship’s walls, corridors and doors are morphing as if to lead him somewhere, with his sneaking about possible because Starscream isn’t really the god-like creator he believes himself to be. Unable to concentrate on more than one thing at once and with Jhiaxus’ army attacking, Starscream must leave these two to their own devices. The ship itself appears to lead Prime right to where he needs to be.

The final page of the main strip ends with Prime trying his best to reason with Jhiaxus and explain what they’ve discovered about the Swarm, but it takes place over a communications signal that frustratingly keeps breaking up. Not that this really matters. Jhiaxus is too far gone and the cliffhanger (before the back up strip) sees him giving the order to pick out random targets on Earth’s surface and blow the planet apart.

This feels like the perfect time to shift to legendary Transformers artist Geoff Senior for part eight of Tales of Earth. 

Wait a minute. Wasn’t it previously established that all of Earth’s cities were devastated by Skullgrin’s Decepticons and the Warworld? Even if San Francisco escaped, this paints a picture of a city without a care in the world. Oh well, discrepancy aside this raises the bar in terms of the threat Earth faces! This opening spread is very reminiscent of Judgement Day from Terminator 2, which had been released in the UK less than two years previous and was very much still in the public consciousness after its home release.

Being familiar with the film doesn’t detract from this opening scene. In fact, it adds to the feeling of the end of everything! Even Grimlock and Predacon leader Razorclaw concur, stating, “It over now. For us all. They did it… they dropped The Big One”. On board the Warworld Prime is devastated, heartbroken. He screams into the void but Jhiaxus orders another attack on another highly populated city, despite the fact his troops are all over the planet. But then, Earth’s salvation comes from an unlikely source: Starscream!

As the Warworld attacks Jhiaxus’ ship with all of its Matrix-powered might, it appears the Autobot trinket is tainting the Deception rather than the other way around, which means those scenes reminiscent of the Matrix/Thunderwing G1 story were a nice bit of misdirection. Starscream doesn’t care about us of course but he has an uncontrollable urge to save us. Doing so is even more important to him than the very thing he previously thought was the most important thing in the universe: himself!

I did laugh as Starscream yells out how he doesn’t want to be good. Prime realises it was him that was subconsciously helping all along within the ship, and he sees hope in the very essence of the thing he’s carried in his chest for millennia. However, suddenly, with only one page to go, the Swarm is here. The previous scene just suddenly stops to give us this cliffhanger.

This felt like a very sudden, very unnatural jump in the story, like the pages were running out and we needed a cliffhanger and, more importably, the Swarm needed to be in place for the final issue. I’m not saying that’s the case, after all we’ve learned how terrifyingly quick it is and how it’s impossible to see it coming. That’s the whole point of it after all. But I can’t help feeling a bit unsatisfied with how this absolutely superb chapter ended.

A necessary evil perhaps with only one issue left. It’s a bumper-sized one next month, with the promise of 36 pages of strip action. Given how things have escalated in the last couple of months, and how amazing this issue was, I have every faith Simon will pull off a satisfying conclusion for a comic cancelled way too early in its run. How he’ll do that I have no idea! We’ll find out together in five weeks on Sunday 31st August 2025.

iSSUE TEN < > iSSUE TWELVE

TRANSFORMERS: GENERATiON 2 MENU

TRANSFORMERS MENU

Beano, Comic Reviews

BEANO #1: THE FiRST ONE

5 Comments

Off we go then with our gradual real time read through of the eight issues of Beano inside the special 80th anniversary box set, put together by DC Thomson in 2018 for their young readers. It’s important to emphasise the target audience here. The bookazine was a light-hearted look back at the comic’s history and its characters and that’s the whole point here too, for the modern audience of children to celebrate their comic’s birthday with an interesting and gigglesome look back at where it came from.

Hence why a certain mascot is missing from the title banner of this, the quality reproduction of the very first edition that was originally edited by Robert D. Low. This set wasn’t the place for a serious discussion about racist stereotypes and why they were deemed acceptable in 1938. Thankfully, DCT has since realised it should never have been on the cover of a children’s publication in the first place. I think it looks miles better without it and I welcome this change. Reg Carter’s Big Eggo can now shine in his well known first appearance.

The biggest surprise I had upon reading this was just how much of it is text heavy. Only 50% of the 24 pages is made up of comic strips, the rest are prose stories or picture-panel tales such as Morgyn the Mighty. Created by Dudley D. Watkins, it’s just one example of the comic describing regular animals as monsters for the sake of some excitement. Of course children can be better informed today about our world thanks to easier access to a myriad of sources across different media.

It’s all very quaint and we must remember it was released in 1938, 87 years before this review. While I always review comics from my own modern perspective, some latitude can be given to such a classic, one that really is from a different era. Morgyn would disappear from The Beano before the end of its first year, before going on to star in various other DCT comics.

There’s only one character I recognised in the whole issue. Lord Snooty made his debut right back at the very beginning and looks pretty much the same as I remember him from friends’ Beano annuals in the 80s. Overall, as you’d expect the humour strips feel dated but that’s not a criticism. I found it fascinating to see what the children of the day would’ve found funny and how much children’s humour comics have evolved, especially since this particular one is still going strong and I occasionally buy it.

Smiler the Sweeper by Steve Perkins would also disappear within the first year but it’s a good example of the few mini-strip pages. Back when I was a kid it was OiNK that introduced me to comics and the strips would all be of various lengths, but all the other humour comics on the shelves (including The Beano when I was growing up) were pretty much full-page or double-page strips throughout, each character appearing on the exact same page from week to week.

Brave Captain Kipper kills the harmless whale and is portrayed as the hero by a bunch of random strangers. What a git

Of course, today’s Beano is much more varied and it’s interesting to see it started out that way too. Originally #1 contained 28 pages of variety entertainment for kids, four more than this reproduction. There’s a small warning on the bottom of a page stating, “Some pages may contain references which are of their time, but would not be considered suitable today”, although one inclusion was too much, namely the mascot edited off the front cover. Called Peanut, he featured on a page inside and, given how any stapled publication is put together in sets of four pages, once one page is taken out DCT would’ve had to trim further for it to physically work. (Thanks to Lew Stinger for the information on what was on one of those pages.)

Some of the contents which could fall under that warning banner includes child character Wee Peem seen smoking a cigar, a genie in a bottle describing himself as a slave happy to serve, Tom Thumb being captured and treated as a slave for entertainment but we’re meant to think it’s okay because Tom plays pranks on his captors, and one strip is simply called Big Fat Joe! Then there’s Brave Captain Kipper, who’s stupid enough to think he’s on an island when it’s actually a giant, peaceful whale. When it harmlessly blows water over him he kills it and is portrayed as the hero by a bunch of random strangers. What a git.

The Wangles of Granny Green by Charles Gordon is the only humour prose story and startlingly tells the tale of a very young boy whose mother has died and whose father goes on long business trips, leaving him behind to fend for himself. Fed up of the local children thinking he’s weird and of adults trying to look after him, he pretends to be his own grandma (the rhyme along the top reminding me of a particularly funny Muppets song) so that people will just leave him alone.

It’s a fun story and reminds me of the kind of comic strips we’d get years later in the likes of Whizzer and Chips etc. I wish I had access to more of these. The story is imaginative and has the potential to have a lot of heart given the set up, and it has such a quaint bit of hype at the end for the next issue that it’s endearing. It’d run for just over a year, returning for a reprint run in the mid-40s before coming back briefly in 1951. Ironically, the same people who’d complain loudly about what’s not on the cover would most likely also complain if Granny Green appeared today in strip form.

Eric Roberts’ Rip Van Wink wears its influence on its sleeve. A little old man falls asleep in his cave only to wake up 700 years later, the humour coming from his reaction to the modern world and the things kids would’ve taken for granted. It’s a bit of a hybrid with regular comic strip-style speech balloons and captions written in a charming rhyming style, even if some of those rhymes are rather forced. Hey, it just adds to that classic comic feel.

I’m sure this must’ve plucked at the heartstrings of the children reading

Elsewhere, Whoopee Hank the Slap-Dash Sheriff doesn’t provide any clues as to the naming of the original free gift (see the cover), the Shipwrecked Kidds is another lost island tale similar to Morgyn with two spoilt brats and two of their staff, and in a far cry from the modern Beano the only character from any minority is a Tarzan-like child who, even though he has an actual name (Derek) is referred to solely as ‘The Wild Boy’.

My last highlight is My Dog Sandy by Jack Glass, another short-lived series that’s rather brutal at times in its description of what the poor pup goes through with his cruel owner. He may be starting a better life by the end of the page but I’m sure this must’ve plucked at the heartstrings of the children reading. It certain did with me. 

I thought this read through would be fascinating and it’s proved to be right from the off. I’d read about the first issue in the Dandy/Beano Fifty Golden Years Book back in 1987 but to read the full issue has been fun and really insightful. To experience it in its almost complete state is something I’d recommend to any humour comics fan as a really entertaining retrospective, an origin story in this case. So what’s next?

Join me next time as we skip forward seven years to the end of World War II, the reduction in food rations, the launch of BBC Light Programme radio which would eventually become Radio 1 and Radio 2, the publication of Animal Farm, the movie Brief Encounter, the Nobel Prize for the discovery of penicillin, the birth of Helen Mirren and the first time we’d meet three steam engines by the names of Edward, Henry and Gordon! Join me on Wednesday 26th November 2025 for The Beano #272, the first issue to sell over one million copies!

GO TO iSSUE 272

BEANO BOX SET MENU

RETROSPECTiVES MENU

Aliens, Comic Reviews

ALiENS #14: MOST OF THE TiME iT’S TRUE

Leave a comment

This fantastic cover by Styx (real name Steve Kane and not to be confused with classic cartoonist Leslie Harding who also went by that moniker) welcomes us to the 14th edition of Dark Horse International’s Aliens monthly, the matte paper lending itself perfectly to this dark image. Inside, we’ve another 48 pages of a somewhat mixed bag but the highs have kept me going again this month.

Editor Cefn Ridout’s editorial hypes an import comic as a suitable replacement for the lack of Predator material in the comic despite the fact specialist shops weren’t as prolific in the UK at the time, especially over here in Northern Ireland. As always, I’ve included this page so you’ve access to all the credits for the issue and turning over we come face-to-facehugger with the 12-page second part of Michael Cook’s Crusade.

In the recap of part one we’re told those weren’t Colonial Marines but employees of a corporation called Minecorp. This wasn’t clear at all last time. Anyway, the company thinks there are profits to be made if they can suss out why London remains clear of aliens after the Earth War, but the people they’ve sent actually seem less concerned about that than they are about helping the tribe they’ve met. Not that the dialogue helps work this out.

The speech is still awful, the overuse of ellipses an attempt to make it feel like they’re in natural conversations, to give the illusion of speech patterns, but instead it’s just broken. The fact there are no captions means the story relies completely on that dialogue too. So from what I can gather London had broken into tribal warfare long before the aliens arrived, even though the comic’s editorials these past two months gave me the impression this happened because of the alien war.

The Minecorp troops need guides and in return they’ve brought food and weapons for the tribe they’ve met. However, one night another tribe infiltrates their camp and kidnaps some of them, including a small child. They take them across the Thames to a large church but floating in the water, almost dealt with incidentally by the story are loads of alien eggs.

Of course when one of these pops up in an Alien story someone has to be stupid enough to look in and that’s exactly what happens here. Then back at the camp we finally get a little bit of character development. Foston’s wife was on the missing recon team, Channon says she’ll go with him even if they don’t have a guide and upon hearing this one of the unnamed tribeswomen agrees to help as she can read the stars and mythical stones to predict the future.

Meanwhile, the archbishop of the church appears to be the leader of a group of Christian fanatics. Seeing Beresford with a facehugger attached he simply tells the rest he’ll attend to it. Instead, he sneaks the body away and inside the tower presents him to an Alien Queen, albeit a very badly drawn one. While reciting the Lord’s Prayer the newborn alien bursts out of Bereford’s chest on a page the editorial described as “horrific”. If I didn’t know better I’d say Cefn was describing the apparently psychedelic art.

In the ongoing prose story Tribes the marines are up against a fanatical religious group who see the aliens as gods, and Crusade follows on from previous lead strip Sacrifice, which saw a priest go up against an alien on her own to test her Christian faith. Then, to add to all of this our Colonial Marines strip this month begins with Vasquez frozen to the spot in fear as an alien approaches and inside her head she’s reciting the Lord’s Prayer!

Perhaps there was a theme being explored across various Dark Horse US Aliens comic strips at the time, some form of larger arc the UK writers wanted to explore too? If that’s the case then I can understand, but if not this is all beginning to get very repetitive and unimaginative. Just as Crusade was beginning to get interesting too. I’ll wait to see how it develops next month. Next up, a one-page reprieve with a look at The Abyss Special Edition.

Dave Hughes has a much more positive view of directors’ cuts than Jim Campbell had previously. The Abyss’ new cut contained almost double the amount of new material as the Aliens Special Edition. This is also how I found out about the rat scene, when one was pushed into breathable liquid. Shockingly it was filmed for real with actual breathable liquid that was in development! Given how the rat reacted I can completely understand why it’s been cut in the UK where we have stricter animal cruelty laws in entertainment.

Despite some online rumour mills, the rats did all survive and received plenty of loving aftercare. But still, imagine if someone suddenly held you underwater without you knowing you could breathe! Even with that particular liquid I still think it was unnecessarily cruel. It could’ve been achieved with special effects and well-timed edits. Cameron has since made a name for himself in his endeavours to protect the planet and all life on it so I’ll assume he never meant to be cruel. I’ll hold on to that belief.

Our 8-page sixth chapter of Chris Warner’s Colonial Marines is next and after Vasquez’s prayer comes this double-page spread showing the potential of Tony Akins’, Paul Guinan’s and Matt Hollingsworth’s art. It’s the same team but it feels more solid than before, especially in its depictions of the new alien race apparently controlling the xenomorphs, the latter thankfully looking more horrific and less cartoon-like as you can.

Unaware they’re being watched on camera by one of the humanoid aliens, this page shows the chaos of the suddenly escalating situation for the marines. It’s an all-action chapter that doesn’t move the plot forward but does see off quite a few of the peripheral characters in more and more horrific ways, not least of which is this accidental death when one marine is grabbed from above and fires their weapon in desperation. These small chunks are great fun every month.

On the Motion Tracker news page we find out the toy competition from last month which required people to buy a handful of Dark Horse International comics is now going to be printed in full in Aliens. No reason is given but Star Wars had been cancelled after surprisingly poor sales. Then it’s on to eight pages of the “mind-blowing conclusion to Horror Show”, according to the cover. So, is it?

On the moon the inhabitants of Luna City live with daily guilt over the loss of their loved ones down on Earth during the recent Earth War, hence why the creatures are infiltrating everyone’s nightmares in the sleep clinic/entertainment company we’ve been introduced to. It’s an intriguing set up that’s produced quite the boring strip so far, but here on page one I find myself feeling for the father of one of their ‘patients’. Is something interesting finally happening?

His daughter is the same person who had the shark/alien dream previously. After a dream involving an alien infiltrating the apparent hospital and chasing her (in which she finds herself outside and back in deep water with the alien in place of the shark), she awakens to find the whole lab has been seized in a rebellion and all the patients are awake. Somehow, her father helped them but it all happens off-camera (as it were). As a reader I immediately felt cheated. The only thing that actually happens and we’re just told about it?

That hyped conclusion sees revenge taken out on the doctor who was not only lying to these people about their treatment but also sexually abusing them. We (and he) are left not knowing if the above is real or part of the virtual reality. It doesn’t make up for the rest of the story but it’s a good idea, despite looking more like Audrey II from Little Shop of Horrors than an alien egg. Personally, I’m glad to see the back of Horror Show.

Much, much (much!) better is the latest part of Tribes, the comic’s serialisation of the novella released in the States. It’s really interesting when it’s written from the Alien Queen’s perspective and Rat’s near fatal escape is real edge-of-the-seat stuff, no exaggeration. I honestly thought she was a goner and she’s my favourite character so it was an exciting read! Again, the italics in her part of the story are intended as flashbacks to the horrors her father forced upon her as a young child and they add to the scares.

One of the aliens dies in a suitably horrifying way, its elongated head slowly sliced in half by a cutting wire as it pushes itself through, trying to get at Rat just beyond. Then, when she sees an x-ray of one of the religious fanatics she recognises the image of the alien inside from an x-ray of her own brother her dad proudly showed her as a child. This is very much Rat’s story and it’s terrific. Writer Steve Bissette’s tale should be on the silver screen!

Alien Vs Predator II isn’t the all-action conclusion you’d think from the cover headline. The Alien Queen was already captured and these final two pages are more about the apparently shocking reveal that one of the Predators is actually a human woman working alongside them. But wasn’t this already obvious from chapters right back at the beginning? I thought that was the whole point of the story and the reveal would be why she was doing this.

So it’s a disappointing ending and makes me miss the separate Predator strip even more. Good news comes on the letters page though. It’s revealed to a reader who has the same opinion as me of the Colonial Marines strip that, with AVP II over and Tribes concluding in two months, more pages will be given to that strip soon. We also find out there’s a comics adaptation of the original Alien film to purchase, written by Vampirella’s Archie Goodwin (whose work I’m enjoying in the publisher’s Dracula) and drawn by Walt Simonson who adapted Jurassic Park.

Colonial Marines and Tribes really carried this issue and boy, did they do a good job of it! Worth the price of admittance, those two. But Crusade could be opening up into something more than I’d previously thought, at least storywise, and we’ve a new two-part Aliens strip called Backsplash beginning in #15 too. Things could be on the up again. We’ll find out if that’s the case on Tuesday 26th August 2025.

iSSUE 13 < > iSSUE 15

ALiENS MENU

Comic Reviews, Dracula

DRACULA #8: VLAD THE CAD

Leave a comment

Another powerful image from Esteban Maroto welcomes us to the eighth edition of Dark Horse International’s Dracula monthly from 1993, the third issue since the comic lost its connection to the new film. It’s the strongest issue yet under its new guise, with no less than three enjoyable strips. The main 12-page Dark Legend A-Borning: Part One is again written by Roy Thomas, drawn by Esteban, coloured by Paul Mounts and lettered by John Costanza. Castle Dracula is complete. In a year? It does lead to showing a bit of Vlad’s dark wit, though. Many didn’t survive the build and those that did were impaled for their treachery. He explains, “Castle Dracula became, in essence, their… life’s work.”

The man thought he was hilarious. He also seems to live in his own little world. Above you can see examples of how he saw himself. Perhaps an insight into how evil men somehow still see themselves as the hero of their story. Throughout Transylvania others don’t share his opinion and are rising up to challenge him. So Vlad sends an emissary to convince the people to swear loyalty to him. When they continue to rise up he says giving them a chance was the Christian thing to do but now he’ll kill them all. During one such slaughter he comes across a woman whose husband has been slain and this leads to the most horrific moment in the series thus far.

The comic glosses over some of the history, such as his hatred towards the Germanic communities: “The reasons are historically complicated and, in the end, unimportant”. Then again, the strip works best when it focusses on key moments rather than trying to squeeze everything in. A former Hungarian ally by the name of Benedict De Boither meets with Vlad in a particularly gruesome scene where he’s eating a feast in a field surrounded by his victims slowly dying on spikes. De Boither is terrified and grovels at his feet. In return for this undying loyalty (if he isn’t loyal, he’ll die) he’s made ambassador: “For you know how to speak to one ruler on behalf of another”.

The war continues and we see montages of monasteries being burned, monks fleeing, and Vlad in shock that they’d then tell stories that made him out to be a monster. Only Mehmed the Conqueror remains on his long list of enemies and when he sends envoys to see Vlad what do you think happens? No prizes for guessing. Then, above, Pope Pius II isn’t exactly Leo XIV when he calls for death to unbelievers and Vlad is quick to step up. As you can see there are a few digs at the church, such as others not wanting to partake in this so-called “crusade” because of a lack of guaranteed riches.

I’m feeling more enthused about the Vlad the Impaler story as it develops. It’s moved on from a crammed, drab history book with fantastic art to a gripping retelling of history with fantastic art. I think that first chapter had a lot of ground to cover to get us to his adult life and his positions of power, which of course would be the time of most interest to fans of the film. Splitting it in two was necessary here but that ended up giving a bad impression of the strip in #6. That chapter’s second part (the following month) and now this month’s are quite the thrill ride. I just hope we get to the end before cancellation!

Dave Hughes’ Bloodlines news pages start off well with some James Bond song lyrics that are only there because they suit the subject at hand. Still, I’ve got the song in my head now. News is thin on the ground it seems and I take issue with the seeming indignation that the director of Pretty Woman can direct something completely different, or the shock that Gary Oldman is also directing.

Can you imagine what would be written here when (the excellent) Tom Cruise was announced as the lead for Interview with a Vampire? I’ve always been fascinated with how writers, actors and directors can turn their hands to different projects, but if Twitter over the years has shown us anything it’s that others are far too quick to judge. Even Anne Rice herself fell foul of this but would later recant when she saw Tom in the role during filming. Maybe we’ll get to the end of the comic’s run before the announcement?

José González takes over art duties on the 11-page classic Vampirella back up strip. Only credited online with this character he won awards for bringing her to the page over a long period of time. He’s credited with creating the style for her and her strip that’s been used ever since. There’s definitely a more mature, gothic horror vibe to it this month and for the first time it’s not a complete tale.

Part one of Death’s Dark Angel is written as always by Archie Goodwin. Beginning with the deaths of two grave robbers by a demon, we find out it’s a less powerful one than Vampirella has dealt with previously but it’s still bargaining with humans, including a vile rich man called Mr. Wade. Wade has less than a year to live yet still ignores his doctors, having lived far beyond his predicted lifespan thanks to a deal with this demon (another follower of Chaos) for his eternal soul after he passes.

As you can see Wade could just as easily be the villain in a modern strip, so this issue’s story feels more contemporary. Especially when a local cop corrupted by Wade’s wealth and power fabricates crimes in order to bring in the Helsings. The demon captures Vampirella but, sensing something different about her, spares her and chains her up instead. The Helsings have been captured in order to confirm whether she could grant Wade eternal life as one of the undead. Of course, once they’re in the same room as her Conrad reacts accordingly! Surely it’s time for Adam to step up and save her after everything that’s happened so far?

This brings back the mystery at the heart of their story arc. Vampirella was indeed on the same plane as the brother of Conrad Van Helsing when it was struck by lightning and crashed, and when Conrad dug up the grave he discovered bite marks on his neck and drove a stake through his heart. (Just to be sure.) He blames Vampirella but, while she did have to feed off humans before the serum she now uses, we don’t know if she fed on his brother or whether her feeding killed.

The only downside to this chapter is Vampirella herself doesn’t have much to do other than be kidnapped. Saying that, her presence is always felt because she’s still what drives the story for all of the other characters. For the first time I’m actually feeling empathy for the lead and I’m hoping for some revelations and development next time. From not-so-great beginnings she’s now the best part of the comic.

In #5 we had the pleasure of a short extra back up strip and I’m pleased to say another from the 60s US comic Creepy (where Vampirella’s strips are lifted from) is included here. Taken from the first issue it’s written by Archie and drawn by Reed Crandal (Tales From the Crypt, The Vault of Horror, Flash Gordon) and the inhabitants of a spooky town are being terrorised by a string of murders apparently committed by a vampire.

We meet a newly married couple, in which the wife is constantly trying to convince her husband they should go out more, that being in bed all day and awake all night isn’t natural. He argues that’s when he must work and when they can also enjoy the nightlife. To begin with it reads awfully old fashioned. Why didn’t she know about his way of life before getting married? The set up seems ridiculous but something struck me about that breakfast juice being all she needed on the page above.

Throughout its six pages are we really supposed to think she’s so stupid as to not realise he’s a vampire? The hints are so obvious we question why she can’t see what’s right in front of her. That is, until the final page. She finally susses it out and opens the curtain to let the sunlight in but she’s the one who dies! It’s a great little tale and just the sort of thing this comic should have more of. Both of these little one-off strips so far have had excellent twists that I didn’t fully see coming. In both I was convinced I knew what it was going to be and both times I’ve been happily proven wrong.

The feature about the role-playing game mentioned on the cover takes two pages to tell us absolutely nothing about it, then on the Fang Mail letters page the results of a competition produced a surprisingly funny moment. It’s also announced that Vampirella will be the cover star next month, showing how important she’s become to the comic. Alternatively, maybe editor Dick Hansom knew the end was near and didn’t want to commission a new cover and it’ll just be a classic Creepy one. We’ll find out in five weeks.

This has been a fantastic issue. While the features may be lacking compared to those in previous issues the three strips are some of the best of the whole run. The comic is really finding its feet after the transition from ‘Bram Stoker’s Dracula‘ to simply ‘Dracula‘. Unfortunately many jumped ship when the transition happened and missed out on this. We’ll find out if they missed more goodness when #9 comes to the blog on Sunday 17th August 2025.

iSSUE SEVEN < > iSSUE NiNE

DRACULA MENU

Comic Reviews, Transformers: Generation 2

TRANSFORMERS GENERATiON 2 #10: LOOKiNG ‘GRIM’

Leave a comment

It’s another issue without any of Derek Yaniger’s artwork inside but don’t lament, #10 of Marvel US’ Transformers: Generation 2 more than makes up for it. Not only with this fantastic image by Derek but also by welcoming back Geoff Senior for the back up strip. We’ll get to that in a bit. First, the escalation of events is clear from the cover and inside the comic the main 16-page strip Total War! doesn’t hold back.

Thanks to Starscream, the combined Autobot and Decepticon forces have been found and their defences bypassed. An epic battle breaks out at Autobase on Earth, which should be an exciting prospect, right? The thing is, despite writer Simon Furman’s electrifying script this may as well be taking place on any of the barren space rocks calling themselves planets we’ve visited throughout the series.

That’s a shame because in every other aspect penciller Manny Galan, inker Jim Amash, colourist Sarra Mossoff and letterer Richard Starkings are on sizzling form (with only the occasional silly elongated neck). Things kick off with what almost amounts to an all-out slaughter of their forces by Jhiaxus and his highly evolved troops. The dialogue between Optimus Prime and Megatron is natural, exciting and at times even funny. In fact, Megatron gets a lot of the best lines in the comic!

Elsewhere, on board the Decepticon’s now-shared Warworld spaceship things are going equally badly as Starscream forces his way on board. Even the silly human-shaped teeth glinting in his silhouette can’t ruin the moment for once. Yes, yes, I know I’ve whined on about them in recent months. I’ll forgive them this one time though, especially since by the end of the issue Starscream may have finally upgraded them to something more palatable. More on that below.

I know the characters are based on toys but for the most part depictions of our toys in our comics haven’t felt that way. Look at the brilliant (but criminally short-lived) Ring Raiders to see how tiny Matchbox planes were depicted, for example. But I must say, Manny’s very toy-like. Transformers when they’re in their aeroplane alt modes really pleases me. It takes me right back to the battles I’d wage in my childhood bedroom with my old Hasbro toys.

There are some nice interactions here which really play up to the characters’ strengths, such as Tracks and Manta Ray above, then the Predacons and Dinobots too! Not that Jhiaxus appreciates their strength in diversity, but then again given what his ultimate goal is of course he wouldn’t. His gall at the “adversity, guile and sheer bloody-mindedness” of his foes is fun to read before he dials things up and calls in his second wave. Yup, everything that went before was just the appetiser.

On the Warworld the troops sent up with Starscream discover the bridge has been abandoned and escape pods are leaving for the surface. They race off in pursuit, assuming Starscream is behind them. But this is Starscream, he has bigger and much more selfish plans afoot and heads off to find the Autobot Matrix of Leadership wired into the centre of the craft.

Back on Earth we get possibly one of my favourite moments in the entire G2 series. Even though Megatron is in his new form, the panel below still harkens back to the earliest days of Marvel UK’s G1 comic. The layout, angle and most of all the depiction of Prime. We also get another funny moment from Megatron, even if it’s also a bit frustrating because he’s never actually given us the reason behind his choice of second-in-command (beyond the comic following the new toy line).

Surely a fan favourite panel, right there!

Megatron does have a plan, though. In fact it’s revealed he had several back up escape routes when he walked into Autobase to form an alliance with Optimus. One such plan was a cruiser with an invisibility cloak parked right next door. Smart. However, while Prime is grateful he’s also very aware they’re still fighting for two very different sides. Retreating to the Warworld he wants to use it as a powerful communications tool to try to reason with Jhiaxus against the new threat, while Megatron sees it as the ultimate weapon. Time for a quick break between strips.

This month’s Bullpen Bulletin contains a few interesting snippets. In the border we find out The Iron Man of 2020 was to get his own mini-series. I really enjoyed this character when he appeared twice in the back up strip in Marvel UK’s Transformers. Former Transformers writer Bob Budiansky was now Special Projects Executive Editor and The Incredible Hulk comic really did sound like it was unmissable. Also, if you read the ‘Question of the Month’ column, the writer of the Alice Cooper comic (there was an Alice Cooper comic?) has a response which in light of this last year or so seems rather telling!

Then it’s straight on to the six-page Tales of Earth back up strip and that exciting moment of welcoming Geoff Senior back to Transformers. Again, this is a straight continuation of the main strip instead of a separate story but I’m not complaining. The whole issue has been action with great characterisation sprinkled throughout and that continues with these last half dozen pages. Jhiaxus’ troops are fired upon and quickly destroyed by incredibly powerful weaponry from the Warworld. But it was reported the ship was secured and in their control. Prime and Megatron witness this as they approach and Megatron continues with his quips.

The battle continues on the surface too and the Dinobots and Predacons are fighting side-by-side in what must’ve been a fan dream come true (even though the Predacons weren’t G2 toys). I particularly like the very Geoff-esque additions such as seeing Razorclaw’s leap, transformation and attack in one panel and Grimlock’s bandana and the ‘Big Grim’ on his arm! Brilliant stuff. Even just seeing the close up of Prime’s eyes drawn by Geoff brings back all the feels.

This is fantastic stuff. The interactions between the characters, the humour, the explosive action and of course elsewhere there are still knife-edge tensions between the usually opposing sides. For example, Razorclaw thinks Megatron’s new troops are enjoying fighting alongside the Autobots a little too much. It all builds up to what is ultimately a letdown of a final page.

Starscream has absorbed the power of the Matrix and melded with the ship. However, a fantastically rendered page by the legendary artist is let down by suddenly atrocious dialogue and an over familiarity with G1’s Underbase Saga, when Starscream absorbed the all-powerful database of information and became a similarly all-powerful entity. It’s the only disappointment in an incredible issue though.

It should come as no surprise to find the Transmissions letters page is chock full of complaints, anger and disbelief at the upcoming cancellation of the comic (announced in #8). While Simon’s response that it was always intended for the first 12 issues to form one story is completely understandable, I do believe the last couple of issues have seen a ramping up of events, perhaps moreso than he originally intended in order to complete as many stories and character arcs as possible.

That’s a rather silly (not to mention expensive) idea from reader Adam Edward Patyk! Not only would it be expensive for all the readers he’s asking to partake in his idea but he seems to have already spent a lot of money and all for nowt. The reply is interesting however, with retailers refusing to acknowledge the title was selling well and instead cutting orders. The curse of being a toy licence comic in the 90s. I’d also forgotten about the mysterious mention of the Leige Maximo way back in #4, so let’s hope that’s resolved over the next two months.

The only reason that final strip page was so disappointing is because every page before it was so perfect. The story, the characterisations, the dialogue, the action, the art… this would’ve been the best issue by far if it weren’t for that cliffhanger. But I’m still positive that the final two issues are going to be incredible and I can’t wait for Sunday 27th July 2025 for the penultimate chapter.

iSSUE NiNE < > iSSUE ELEVEN

TRANSFORMERS: GENERATiON 2 MENU

MAiN TRANSFORMERS MENU