DRAGON’S CLAWS #4: FRENCH FRiED

Another month, another foray into the far future with Marvel UK’s classic Dragon’s Claws. It may look like there’s an ancient oriental theme to the story this time around if the cover is anything to go by, but actually Steel here is facing off against one of two French armies. This month’s exciting comic is just that: exciting! It pushes the background intrigue and shocking story arcs from last time aside and concentrates instead on a self-contained tale that’s no less thrilling.

A quick mention of the editorial page first and that opening paragraph doesn’t change from issue-to-issue, remaining as a quick introduction for any new readers. It reminds me of how American TV shows of the 80s and 90s would’ve had a spoken narration at the beginning of their opening credits, so it feels perfectly of its time. Think Knight Rider, Jag and Babylon 5. These were (and still are) all favourites of mine so this gets me hyped every month.

As usual the in-universe Fastfax gives us a little bit of background to the story before it starts on the opposite page. It’s interesting to get some insight into how the wider world outside Greater Britain is faring and it appears France isn’t doing so well, with the rich carving up the country for their own benefit, the rest of the populace suffering as a result. The rebel group La Folie appear to be getting painted as a terrorist group here, so I’m pretty sure that won’t be the case as the story unfolds.

Of course, we know already who’s going to be selected to do the prisoner exchange between the World Development Council and the rebels, don’t we? I’m also intrigued by this mention of a Canadian vigilante, seemingly innocently slotted in there at the end. Perhaps a character we’ll get to in a future story. These Fastfax updates throw out hints and character references every month, painting a lovely three-dimensional world crafted by writer Simon Furman which I hope we get time to explore in the ten issues.


“When Dragon pulled us Dragon’s Claws back together as government agents, his intent was to restore order to this mad world!”

Steel

The first half of Simon’s story (drawn by Geoff Senior, lettered by Annie Halfacree, coloured by Steve White, edited by Richard Starkings) is heavy on the action while not wasting any time in developing the story. It may be a little predicable in the end but that could be down to the fact it’s 35 years old. At the time I’m sure it kept readers guessing until the end. So the barons mentioned in the Fastfax are battling all over the country, tearing it apart and killing hundreds of thousands of innocent bystanders in order to advance their power. La Folie are being painted as terrorists instead of freedom fighters because this suits the governments of the world.

Dragon’s Claws have been assigned to return La Folie’s two members in exchange for the government’s man and Dragon himself is on route to rendezvous with his team with the prisoners when he comes under attack by La Folie’s second-in-command Colonel Gescaux. He wants to kill prisoners Legris and Ostleur as they seem to know something that their leader can’t find out. Straight away Dragon seems to know all is not as black and white as the governments are painting it, even throwing himself into harm’s way to save the so-called terrorists from a grenade.

Meanwhile, the rest of his team find themselves between two warring factions. Mercy is all for abandoning the area, it’s not their fight after all, both sides are in the wrong as far as she’s concerned and can wipe each other out. But as Steel points out the local town is being devastated by their battle and given why Dragon reformed the team as government agents (the first time his reason is explained) it very much is their fight. Hence the cover.

Legris takes a moment to have it out with Dragon in a scene where they end up surrounded by Gescaux’s men. Before Dragon battles his way out, entrusting Legris and Ostleur to help out and not make a run for it, he realises he has respect for Legris, that he’s a man of integrity and belief in a cause. Gescaux just wants La Folie for himself, to turn it into the criminal organisation the world already thinks it is in order to further his own schemes. These two men know this and Gescaux knows if their leader found out he’d be a dead man.

Turn the people against each other to enrich the rich even further. Sound familiar?

The story revolves around the point that Greater Britain and the wider World Development Council will happily ally themselves with corrupt world leaders in order to advance their own personal interests, not those of the people they’re meant to serve. They don’t care who gets scapegoated, ostracised from civilisation or killed, as long as no one knows what’s really going on in the corridors of power. Turn the people against each other to enrich the rich even further. Sound familiar?

So while this chapter in the adventures of Dragon’s Claws may not advance any of those plots I found so intriguing over the first few issues, it’s beginning to paint a wider canvas for future stories to take part in and I do hope we get to see more of the world, or even revisit France at some point. (UPDATE: We don’t.) Speaking of which, let’s get back to that battle between the warring barons the rest of the Claws couldn’t walk away from and a surprising moment of comedy thanks to my favourite character, Scavenger.

I love this moment so much. The person he hit thanks to the lady’s headscarf was one of the leaders, the plan being to take down one of them so their followers would flee, creating an opening to do so with the other leader, thus saving the town. Steel stops Mercy from killing the other baron, instead putting weapons in front of them both and telling them to fight it out to the death instead of sending their troops into battle for them. Naturally, they show themselves up as the cowards they are and run away instead.

The main thrust of the story ends with Dragon taking on all of Gescaux’s minions, who then tries to escape instead of fighting on (again, typical) and he jumps onto their vehicle. However, Dragon notices the fuel tank is ruptured and about to blow. He still tries to save Gescaux but he’s too late and the terrorist gets blown to smithereens. After an arduous wait to see if the freed prisoners will keep to their word (Dragon let them go to the exchange alone), Ambassador Golding turns up. The other, so-called ‘terrorists’ kept to their word, this honourability proving most important to Steel.

With a little acknowledging nod to the previous story arcs we reach the end for now. After learning of Dragon’s reason for agreeing to become an agent of the World Development Council (and N.U.R.S.E.) earlier in the issue, his comment here about re-educating people isn’t just a throwaway line. Instead, it’s a true heroic statement and one that’ll hopefully lead to many exciting adventures to come, swiftly followed in the next moment with him cracking a joke. A great ending.

Well, there’s actually one more page to go. Last issue’s story also finished but then had a final page hinting at things to come, it’s something of a trademark for Simon’s comics if this and Death’s Head are anything to go by. So as we turn to the final page we get another surprise cliffhanger. In a moment that’s reminiscent of The Terminator films a bright ball of electricity signals the arrival of a futuristic robotic character, appearing in The ‘Pool (Liverpool) next to The Evil Dead’s Death Nell, one of only two apparent survivors of that Game team from #2. This is a particularly exciting entrance!

Anybody who’s been following the Death’s Head real time read through will know all about the character created in the pages of Transformers by Simon Furman and Geoff Senior. After a few appearances in that hit comic and discovering the origins of the Cybertronians he disappeared through time (after a battle with Unicron) only to appear in Doctor Who Magazine.

There he was brought down to human size by the Seventh Doctor (Sylvester McCoy’s) in a funny strip in #135 of his publication and then tricked into jumping to Earth in the year 8162, a very familiar time for readers of Dragon’s Claws. Now, with Death’s Head’s own comic due for release before the end of the year it’s time for him to make his reappearance in Marvel UK’s lineup at last and I for one can not wait! Check out the very back page of the comic below, drawn by Bryan Hitch rather than Geoff, so I wonder who is drawing the next chapter. Interesting, and a superb choice of artist.

I really am sick and tired of that “’Nuff Said” phrase though. Between Dragon’s Claws, Havoc and Transformers it was so overused by Marvel UK and every single time they did it just felt like a cop out, like the editor couldn’t be arsed saying anything else. At least Action Force were getting much more exiting covers for their monthly than they were a few issues back, with more superb Geoff Senior artwork to gawk at.

With page 28 sufficiently gawked, it’s time to wrap things up for Dragon et all for another month. This continues to be an extraordinarily fun comic, full of action, character and world building that’s second-to-none. With a crossover event next month and the background arcs set to return, I don’t know how they’ve managed it but I’m getting ever more hyped every month for the next issue. Come back on Sunday 8th October 2023 for Dragon’s Claws #5 to see if that trend is set to continue.

iSSUE THREE < > iSSUE FiVE

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FANZiNE FUNNiES: GOiNG ROGUE

It’s been a while since fan favourite OiNK cartoonist Lew Stringer released one of his excellent collections. At the time of writing the only one reviewed so far on the OiNK Blog since I relaunched this site in 2021 is Derek the Troll (definitely check that out). Beginning next year in a new series of posts I’ll be getting caught up with a myriad of releases from Lew and many other OiNK contributors, something I’m particularly looking forward to.

For now, back to Lew’s Fanzine Funnies. Between 1991 and 2006 Lew created a series of daft comic strips for Camera Obscura, a fanzine for a small branch of Two and Six, a fan society for the classic 60s TV show The Prisoner. Originally based around the eponymous white sphere from the series and later focussing on a fictional obsessed fan, in the opening editorial Lew hopes readers will still find them amusing even if they’re not familiar with the subject matter. Having finished this collection I can assure you this is most definitely the case.

The Prisoner may have only had 17 episodes but a devoted fanbase grew up around it and Patrick McGoohan’s Number Six character. It may also have been broadcast ten years before I was born but its signature phrase, “I am not a number! I am a free man!” was still being used in everything from comedy sketches to television commercials, as was Rover the huge white ball-like creature (apologies if that’s an erroneous description, I’ve never seen it and am writing from memory) who is first up in these strips.

Taking one of these ‘Rover’ sentries and redefining him as an out-of-work actor after the series ended is a genius idea and opened up a myriad of possibilities. These include ludicrous auditions for new roles, a rabid fan following for what is essentially a giant balloon, time travelling to 1992 to escape these people only to appear at a reunion for the fan society and getting his own Saturday morning cartoon show, Hanna-Barbera style.

Lew even ties The Prisoner in with his own ‘Lewniverse’ of characters in a way. Rover has an agent, and that agent’s name is Roy L.T. Check, who may be familiar to fans of Combat Colin from the pages of Transformers. Alongside all of this daftness are a range of special additions like a Prisoner clothing line, a Doctor Who page and even that old Lew staple, a board game.


“Coathangers are featured for precisely 8.57 seconds in the opening minutes. That’s almost 9 seconds… 6 upside down!”

Alistair Sadgitt

The fans in the society even have a bit of fun poked at them. For example, in the future they hold their meetings on the moon (because Portmeirion in Wales where the show was filmed has been moved there to protect it from pollution) and Rover is bluntly honest when he tells them what he really thought about the show. It’s all in good jest and shows the fans could have a giggle at themselves and not take things too seriously.

However, I’m sure we all know from our own personal acquaintances over the years or from social media those fans that do take things far too seriously; the intense fanboys that like to try and lord it over the rest of us and who are simply best ignored. The second half of this collection focuses on Lew’s version of one of these people and he’d give any of them a run for their money. Meet Alistair Sadgitt (sad git).

While there are plenty of Alistair strips I think this page perfectly sums up the character. The show ended with so many open-ended questions that fan theories and discussions have continued ever since, often picking out supposed clues and running themes from the episodes to try and explain the unsolved mysteries. However, as you can see Alistair takes this to the nth degree.

Complete with his Number Six-like jacket (not actually tailored, it has masking tape for its trimmings) his overly-obsessive ways are the funniest aspect of this collection. I may not be familiar with The Prisoner but I certainly am with the type of person Lew is taking the hand out of here. On a related note, it’s mentioned that he’s 42-years-old. I’m 45 at the time of writing! Either Alistair’s ways have aged him or I’m a lot older than I feel!

Towards the rear of the comic are a selection of strips and images taken from other publications or created for fan events, my favourite being one in which the main character of the show is retooled as a traditional humour comics character, called Number Six and his Unmutual Tricks! As a fan of OiNK, which turned traditional comics on their heads, this reads like as much of a spoof of those comics as it does The Prisoner.

Any fan of Lew’s (or indeed funny comics in general) should find plenty to enjoy here, and plenty to laugh along with. However, for fans of The Prisoner it’s an essential purchase. Presented in landscape format with 32 pages in total, all printed on top quality paper stock and a card cover it’s a high quality piece of self-publishing, just like all of Lew’s other collections. All of this for only £5 plus postage? Bargain.

To order your own copy just head on over to Lew’s eBay seller’s shop where you can also sometimes find original art and more for sale. Lew accepts all forms of payment and not just PayPal either. At the time of writing, Fanzine Funnies had only been released a couple of weeks ago and is already on its second printing. You could definitely do worse than bookmarking Lew’s eBay page and keeping a regular eye on it to see what else pops up, he sometimes reprints some of his sold out comics further down the line, and don’t forget his personal blog where new comics are obviously announced first.

“He’s not a number, he’s a free weather balloon.”

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THE LOST WORLD JURASSiC PARK #4: THE END?

Well here we are at the final issue already of Titan Magazine’s The Lost World Jurassic Park comic. In the States, just as with the original movie, Topps Comics released its adaptation as a four-part mini-series. When the original adaptation proved popular further stories were told as the first official sequel to the film, however in 1997 no further adventures after the sequel movie were forthcoming. In the UK, instead of simply having a one-off special consisting of all four chapters as had happened with other adaptations at the time Titan decided to also do a mini-series, with exclusive extras for UK readers of course.

Unfortunately #2 remains the only issue to feature one of the gorgeous animatronic animals from the movie on the front but I do like this final cover by original adaptation writer Walter Simonson and Richard Ory, complete with an exceptionally cute little baby Tyrannosaurus rex. It also gets across the exciting moment from the movie a lot better than the strip. Inside we go and we kick things off with our heroes arriving at the workers’ village in a suitably eerie scene.

Once again the narration sets the scene, most likely taken directly from the script and unlike in previous issues it doesn’t feel like it’s trying too hard, writer Don McGregor’s captions perfectly balanced with the more subdued art on these first pages from penciller Jeff Butler, inker Armando Gil, colourist (and editor) Renée Witterstaetter, alongside the lettering by Ken Lopez. Even the lack of detail in the buildings adds a feeling of things being shrouded in mystery and shadows, capturing the feeling of this moment in the movie really well.

Nick Van Owen arrives alongside the rest of the characters, Ian Malcom, Sarah Harding and Ian’s daughter Kelly and I’m fine with this change, it helps get the same story beats across in a shorter time frame, one of the better decisions made in this adaptation. Then on the very next page my hopes for a better comic book climax than the original movie received are dashed when another brilliant part of the movie is hacked down to an unrecognisable state.

So much happens here in the movie and it’s all just excised including, yet again, anything to do with Vanessa Lee Chester’s character, Kelly. In the original film’s comic adaptation Samuel L Jackson’s Ray Arnold suddenly disappeared without explanation. Now we also have this movie’s sole black character unceremoniously edited out of all of their scenes.

There’s an overall feeling of this chapter being rushed

Yes, Ian’s moments being chased around here are nowhere to be seen but at least he’s still front and centre elsewhere, whereas Kelly is basically ignored throughout all the chapters, and to have her most important moment not even referred to is criminal. I’m also personally unhappy they removed the moment that in the cinema made me jump out of my seat, which in turn made my friend jump, which in turn made me jump again! (The bit with the ‘raptor under the wooden wall.) But hey, that’s just me.

Almost as annoying as all of this is the fact Roland Tempo is somehow still alive and well without a single scratch just like in the film, even though we blatantly saw him get killed off two weeks ago, something I was happy the movie didn’t do. Did Don forget this had happened in his version? There’s an overall feeling of this chapter being rushed and the art suffers just as much as the script. There’s an overall lack of detail and finesse throughout. Here are some key examples.

That scene of the Velociraptors in the long grass would make no sense if you hadn’t seen the film, characters no longer look like their onscreen counterparts and the gloriously detailed dinosaurs from the first couple of chapters give way to cartoonish monsters. The final chapter of Jurassic Park’s adaptation suffered the same fate and it would seem no one learned any lessons from it in the three years since.

I know I’m coming across as very negative and usually I only include comics on the blog that I enjoy; I like to keep this as a positive reading experience. The original Jurassic Park comic was awesome, I loved it and it holds a special place in my heart. It’s the whole reason there’s a section for JP on the blog in the first place. This mini-series is very much an extra aside to that, I don’t think I would’ve included this on its own. It’s a crying shame because I love the movie so much.

Towards the end of the story 11 pages are given over to the San Diego scenes, albeit a bare bones version of them. The panel above of the S.S. Venture crashing into the docks is about as detailed a panel as you’ll find in this final chunk of story. You wouldn’t even know any of this was taking place in a city because the backgrounds just don’t exist beyond one panel. Other than there being a sporty car involved this could all be happening back on Isla Sorna.

Below you’ll see the one and only panel that shows some hurriedly drawn buildings and the word “cinema” visible behind the T-rex’s tail. Next to it is a panel I’ll use to sum up these eleven pages. Look at the panel with the car. There are no backgrounds, not even a road! Storywise, we get the ‘rex leaving the ship, discovering Ian and Sarah have his baby, then we’re back at the dock. That’s it.

Thinking back to when I first saw this film in the theatre, the moment we saw the InGen helicopter and the camera panned down to show it was flying over a city was a real shock to the system. It was so unexpected from a Jurassic Park film (I hadn’t watched any trailers before seeing it) and as surprise endings go it’s right up there for me. There was so much to enjoy about it which is why its treatment here is so underwhelming.


“This is a parent teaching its young to feed on its own”

Narrative caption, Don McGregor

Surprisingly Peter Ludlow’s final scene gets three pages to play out fully. One of the most satisfying endings for a villain character, it pretty much happens as it does in the movie, even if the backgrounds are still conspicuously absent. To anyone unfamiliar, this is back on the boat now, Ian and Sarah having lured the adult back into the cargo hold by placing the baby there and then jumping overboard themselves, before climbing back on from the other side of the ship, ready to close the bay doors when the T-rex enters.

From Ian and Kelly to the adult and baby Tyrannosaurs, the theme of The Lost World Jurassic Park movie was one of family and parental instincts. Sarah is even an expert on archeological parental behaviours just to hammer the point home. Personally, more than any other film in the series this one showed the dinosaurs as complex characters in their own right, a far cry from how they’d been described before this franchise. But anyway, Ludlow is about to get eaten.

I’m glad this moment wasn’t cut because it shows the adult teaching the baby and it’s a particularly chilling moment in the film, even if it elicits a dark grin from the audience. Given how much has been left out these past two months it might seem like an odd moment for anyone reading who hadn’t seen the film and all of its moments between the Tyrannosaur family members, but for those reading this as a way of filling the gap before the home video release it would bring back memories of that scene really well.

After all of my complaints about the lacklustre art in this final issue we finally get a moment that matches the potential those first couple of chapters had. As the InGen helicopter circles overhead trying to get a good shot to kill the ‘rex, Sarah shoots the tranquilliser dart first and we get this page with a particularly fantastic, expressive, dramatic panel when the dart strikes.

I look back at those first two chapters and the gloriously detailed scenes in the jungle with the Stegosaurus family and I can’t help but wonder what this series could’ve at least looked like, even if the script was still a shadow of the film. What if we’d had that early level of detail coupled with the dynamism of the page above? What an impact it could’ve made. The art team was definitely up to the task but it seems deadlines and a rushed story hindered them in the end.

Don’t get me wrong, I understand the task of taming a beast of a movie script down to four comics was monumental and I found Don’s explanations in a previous issue fascinating but in the end I think he boiled it down too much to the maths. I’ll get back to that in a little bit further down this review but let’s finish things off with the final page of the strip. Happily, Richard Attenborough’s beautiful John Hammond speech remains mostly intact, as does that famous Jurassic Park line first uttered by Jeff Goldblum’s Ian.

As you can see detail in anything other than the few dinosaurs in the immediate foreground is minimal and when you contrast this with #1 the difference is stark. My final thoughts on the comic strip itself in just a moment. First up though are the extras editor John Freeman and his team assembled, some of which have definitely been the highlights in previous issues.

First up is a competition to win a mug with the logo of the film on it. Not the most exciting of prizes, you’d expect this to be a runner up prize, but then again the original comic gave away a large variety of swag, everything from a simple set of glow-in-the-dark stickers to actual Sega Mega CD systems. So if this had been an ongoing comic I’m sure the same would’ve applied to future competitions, and at the end of the day I’d still like that mug!

The competition itself is somewhat easy though, right? Upon first glance I thought it’d be a case of naming the dinosaurs, with the ones in silhouette form being the trickier ones, but actually it’s just a matter of matching them to the pictures in the next row. I remember competitions and quiz pages like that in my old Thomas the Tank Engine & Friends comics as a child and it seems very out of place for the target audience of a Jurassic Park title.

There are a wonderful couple of pages detailing a selection of the merchandise released to tie in with the hottest film of the summer of 1997. There are some action figures of the dinosaurs shown, including a T-rex apparently engaging in a spot of S&M and mention of a figure of Ian with a jet pack! Really? Sadly no pictures of that one. Of more interest to this retro gamer are screenshots of some of the videogame releases of that year.

My friends laughed as I jumped and slid about the seat in reaction to the dinosaurs

The first image shown is from the arcade game, where players would sit inside a mock jeep with tranquilliser guns and on the screen was a fast-moving on-rails shooter with graphics that were mind-blowing for the time. I’ve played this one. A local ten-pin bowling alley had it for a few years in the late 90s and early 00s, and I have distinct memories of my friends laughing as I jumped and slid about the seat in reaction to what was happening while another friend sat quietly shooting at the dinosaurs.

There are also screenshots from the platform game available on the Sega Mega Drive and the 3D game (that was a new thing at the time) for the Sega Saturn and the new Sony Playstation. Sadly there’s no mention of the Nintendo GameBoy Lost World game. I had a GameBoy in the 90s and adored the game of the first film which was also a competition prize in the original comic. (There just might be more about that on the blog later this year.)

The Script to Strip article from #2 gets a second part here, although it’s a lot smaller and features less information. It would also have been a lot more interesting if the correct page of the movie script had been used in the comparison on the left. It does give a decent insight into the ‘Roar’ page from #3 though. It even mentions in Don’s original pages how the characters were meant to react to the sound, but in the finished page they did not.

A quick personal note: That T-rex in the bottom-right is actually a version of the cover from my very first Jurassic Park comic as a teen.

This is the perfect point to reflect on the entire strip. I’ve said all along there have been moments of potential; the early art was fantastic and #2 was a vast improvement over #1 in terms of adapting the film to the medium. However, towards the end the art definitely suffered. I’m making an assumption here, I know, but it could’ve been due to tight deadlines towards the end to ensure it was released in America at the same time as the film. I also think Don’s articles have unintentionally summed up what went wrong, for me anyway.

Some lovely art and some fun extras have made this comic mini-series worth reading and the completist will definitely find those elements enjoyable

In part one of Script to Strip Don talked about the amount of pages David Koepp’s movie script had compared to how many the comic would have in total to tell the same story, and he explained how many pages of it he’d have to squeeze into each comic page. Now, after reading the whole story it feels like it was more about solving the problem by logic rather than creatively. The first chapter in particular of the original Jurassic Park adaptation showed how to include as much of the movie as possible while being very aware it’s a different medium, using imaginative ways to swap scenes or retell them in a new way. It felt like the film but it was different. A bit like adapting a novel into a movie you could say.

Towards the end though it felt like a checklist was being ticked off as it rushed from one scene to the next, paying lip service to moments the reader would remember from the film. With the sequel, in breaking everything down mathematically as Don did it’s felt like that throughout all four chapters, with some glimmers of the (that word again) potential here and there, which just made it all the more frustrating, knowing this team was capable of so much more.

So here we are at the final page of the final issue of The Lost World Jurassic Park which mentions a third novel by Michael Crichton. While there’s the occasional mention of such a thing on fan sites there’s nothing official anywhere to state he actually started it. Instead, Jurassic Park III and specifically Jurassic World would pull a lot from the two released novels. The rest of this page takes me back to all of the discussions at the time about DNA cloning and I can remember teenage me being very excited by documentaries and such on the subject.

So that’s us. Some lovely art in the earlier issues and some fun extras have made this mini-series worth reading and the completist will definitely find those elements enjoyable, just don’t expect anything ground breaking from yet another movie-to-comic adaptation. I do want to go and watch the movie again though! Remember, all 16 issues of the original comic, including the first official Jurassic Park sequel, have been reviewed and I’ll be returning to that series with the graphic novel collections of the rest of that story, which we never saw printed in the UK at the time, so I’ve never read them!

Definitely something to look forward to there. In the meantime, remember… “don’t go into the long grass”.

BACK TO iSSUE THREE

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OiNK! #66: PRODiGiOUS PORK

This has been the best monthly issue of OiNK yet and feels like it’s really beginning to hit its stride in its new form. Such a shame there are only two more issues to go! Let’s concentrate on the one right in front of me for now though because it’s a riot. Horace (Ugly-Face) Watkins gets cover status thanks to co-editor Tony Husband, although just like last month I can’t help but feel there should’ve been a different cover star. Horace takes up three pages in a brilliant strip inside but the return of Pigswilla has nine! We’ll get to him in a sec.

On the second page is another artist’s profile, seemingly left over from the recent Holiday Special which contained ten of them. Lew Stringer’s can be found in this issue for some reason and I’ve added it to the Cartoonists’ Profiles post with the rest of them as it’s just too good to miss. This is definitely an issue fans of Lew’s won’t want to miss out on with his strips taking up 13 pages, over a quarter of the whole comic! I’ve included them all here as highlights because they’re hands down the very best this issue has to offer, beginning with the return of everyone’s favourite giant robotic pig. 

According to Lew this particular Pigswilla strip was originally conceived as a weekly serial but, unlike The Street-Hogs last month, The Perils of Pigswilla had slight tweaks made to it (such as chapter length and the amount of comic violence) to help it work better as one complete strip for the new OiNK. I certainly agreed with Lew when he told me he was very pleased with how it turned out. Certainly, after previous strips of the character’s were double-page spreads, it’s great to see him get the kind of space his frame deserved.

It’s split into three parts of various lengths and kicks off with the British public in awe of their mechanical hero after his most recent victory against some banana people. So far, so normal. But the butchers of the world aren’t happy at all; sales of pork have plummeted in a world where pigs have been given equal footing in society as humans, a topical note that The Street-Hogs strip last issue kicked off with. They’ve only one option: to destroy the perception of Pigswilla in the public eye. How will this reverse the trends they’re unhappy with? Well, to answer this Lew takes a jab at something which is unfortunately still very much prevalent today.

Initially I thought the death of the professor may not have been in the original weekly serial version of this strip, what with that version of OiNK being aimed at a younger audience, but then I remembered Jeremy Banx’s Hieronymous Van Hellsong from those issues! Plus I remember this being very funny to the younger version of me as well. I love the chaos of the hypnotising panel, it reminds me of the Spirograph toy from the 80s. For the first time we also see the new OiNK logo depicted in one of the strips, confirming this was created for the monthlies.

It’s all hugely enjoyable and then I let out a roar of laughter when I saw the TV interviewee, his demeanour, appearance and especially his t-shirt. Showing how fickle the public can be and how easily they can be scaremongered by those with ulterior motives (the butchers in this case) we even see pigs’ homes being bricked to chants of “Sage and onion”. Yes it’s funny but it’s also making a point and very much poking deserved fun at people like that. It’s satire suitable for kids and I think I can say with certainty things like this (and Lew’s previous dig at bigots in a Pete and his Pimple strip) had a very positive impact on me at that age. It’s even funnier to me today of course.

Part one ends with this shocking moment of Pigswilla being blasted by the army and apparently taken offline. He’s got one friend though, his creator Professor Compton Codger’s lab technician Jenny Mercury (always loved the names Lew gave his characters). She climbs inside his giant noggin and begins to tape him back together, taking over the handy manual controls just as the butchers use their dark magical powers to create their own giant robot, formed from the spleens “of a thousand hogs” and scrap metal for yet another Pigswilla enemy.

The butcher robot goes from one pig owner’s house to another, collecting them to chop up later with us humans cheering it on(!) when, with Jenny’s help, the huge swine comes back to life, albeit with one key difference. Never passing up the chance to get some rhyming lyrics into a strip, Lew has made one of the after-effects of Pigswilla’s near complete shutdown a case of accidental rapping! Just when you thought it surely couldn’t be possible to add another level of absurdity to the proceedings. I also like how we can see out of Pigswilla’s eyes in the last panel of this chapter.

There’s come cracking (crackling?) dialogue as the fight continues and Pigswilla looks ever more defeated. Even a cow gets in on the act. Pigswilla and Jenny work together and eventually overcome his apparent death by tricking the butchers into taking a swing near an electricity pylon with obvious results. We then get a great big chunky written panel explaining how things were all okay in the end, finishing with Pigswilla dancing through the streets but thankfully without the rapping fixed.

That wordy panel is funny for another reason. Maybe I’m looking too deeply into it, but personally the absurdity of how simply things are reversed in the public’s opinion just highlights how absurd it was that they turned against him in the first place, again mirroring the real world. Even today people still fall for it every time! It’s all brilliant stuff and my very favourite strip from the monthlies. The only negative I can think of is the fact he didn’t get the cover to go along with this (although an intended weekly cover was used as the Next Issue promo).

One of the funniest OiNK strips ever and one I’ve been particularly looking forward to revisiting

We’ll come back to Lew in a moment but first let’s have a little interlude for what I described in the ‘Coming Up: OiNK! #66’ post as one of the funniest OiNK strips ever and one I’ve been particularly looking forward to revisiting. While it’s not from his Meanwhile… series it’s just as unique a strip from Kev F Sutherland as you’d expect. I love Kev’s art style, especially in this double-page spread with its great sense of place, the chaotic labs and superb use of shadow, and of course it’s hilarious.

The Three Scientists is one of those OiNK strips which has replayed itself in my head several times over the years, particularly when I’ve been watching Doctor Who and there’s been some neat twist in a plot involving time travel. This is always guaranteed to bring a smile to my face. Back in 1988 it had me creased up with laughter. Its elaborate set up all leading to a quick, simple, perfect gag is classic Kev. Enjoy this one.

Two quick highlights before we return to the Lewniverse and these may be two completely different entries in this issue of OiNK and by completely different contributors but they have a bit of a linked theme. First up is co-editor Tony Husband’s cover star, Horace (Ugly Face) Watkins. In pursuit of a regular, relaxing holiday with no football fans or weird occurrences, they’ve ended up meeting Dracula! Horace’s unique way of dispatching the vampire is just as funny today and leads nicely into the next highlight.

GBHDP is the new political party from OiNK’s in-house mail order gangsters and among the ridiculousness one particular section stood out to me. In recent years there’s been a clamouring among certain types of people, including readers of that aforementioned tabloid, for the return to older so-called ‘Victorian values’. This brilliant madvertisement from Simon Thorp shows this isn’t just a recent thing.

In fact, the GBHDP party goes so far as to end their madvert with the slogan, “GBHDP – Together we can make Britain GRATE again.” Even 32 years later that says it all, doesn’t it?

Moving on and it’s clear Tom Thug’s strips are being aimed at the slightly older target audience with what occurs here, although I don’t remember it flying over my head or being in any way less enjoyable when I was still a few months away from my 11th birthday. History is made right here folks, because we have a first for a children’s humour comics character when Tom actually leaves school and moves out into the adult world.


“I’m gonna sign me cross fer a pocketfulla dosh!”

Tom Thug

This would only be a temporary situation of course. When OiNK merges into Buster in a few months the strip turns back time for more misadventures in school, but for now we get to see him actually sign on and, as you’d expect of him, he thinks it’s a way of getting as much money as he wants for nothing. Well, he is a pillock after all. The last gag may have been lost on me as a child. It’s a topical gag, not something OiNK did much of until these later issues. I probably grinned and laughed at his predicament without realising its topicality.

So yes, we’ve a couple of issues to go to see how Tom fairs in the big, bad world and I’m sure he’ll be even less successful (if that’s possible) than he was when he thought he could lord it over the smaller kids in school. At the bottom is a rare writing credit for someone other than Lew, who told me, “I think Mark wanted Tom to get older and sign on and suggested the basic idea of that but everything else was up to me.” A shame we won’t get to see much of this part of Tom’s life but I look forward to it regardless.

Finishing off his hat trick for this issue, Lew’s Pete and his Pimple gets three pages when a reader suggests blasting Pete into space to save the rest of us from being covered in exploding pus. There are so many great gags straight out of the gate with this strip; the caption giving away why the tanks are drawn that way, XL5’s cameo, the life support and more. It’s not an exaggeration to say there’s a real good giggle to be found in every panel of the first page, and is that a familiar guest star from Pigswilla? As for the rest, it just gets better and better as Pete gets Lost in Space.

I love the design of the aliens and seeing the caricatures of the cast of the 60s show takes me back to childhood Sunday lunchtimes with repeats on Channel 4. The fact one of them is labelled ‘The Boring Macho One’ is spot on (no pun intended) because he’s actually the only one I can’t remember! With some fun digs at the simplicity of 60s sci-fi and the usual description of a UFO being taken literally this is one of Pete’s best. There’s also a censored panel here too!

Lew originally drew Pete urinating on the robot

If you look closely at the first panel on the third page of the strip you may see a shape beside the “old junk”, almost like a very faint silhouette. As it turns out that’s exactly what it is. Lew originally drew Pete urinating on the robot rather than hiding him behind it and you can just about make out how he was standing, looking down at little splashes. It’s been edited, but not very well.

According to Lew’s personal blog, “My original art was censored in one panel! I’d shown Pete (with his back to us) having a wee against the robot but that was too much for [Fleetway]. They stuck a piece of paper over him and changed the tail of the word balloon so it looked like Pete was hidden behind the robot… BUT the paste-over was opaque and with a bit of Photoshop enhancement you can see Pete’s silhouette…”. Here’s the image as Lew presented it to show what he meant. Thanks to Lew for letting me share this.

It wasn’t the first time one of Lew’s strips was edited, although in a previous Tom Thug the edit made things worse!

There are just the five pages of reprints this time. One is the Johnny the Jet strip from #8 and the others are made up of the final two OiNK Superstar Posters, printed double-sided. Well, one ‘Megastar Poster’ and one simply named ‘Poster’. The latter was deemed a suitably bland title for Mary Lighthouse’s which was also taken from #8, while #6’s Uncle Pigg poster by Ian Jackson was renamed for a bit more grandeur. Naturally. This is actually the poster of him I’ve used in my home office since it meant I could use it without losing any strips on the back.

Without question this has been the best monthly issue so far and really feels like it’s hit its stride. The same thing happened with the weeklies and I get the impression that it could’ve really worked in this format if it hadn’t been cancelled. Of course, OiNK was still at its best in its 32-page fortnightly guise (first 44 issues) with its themes, all of its characters intact and aimed at the original target audience while still suitable (and read by) older fans too. But as a different, older version of the same comic this issue really works.

After all of the lengthy strips I just wanted to round things off with a couple of slices of miniature Ed McHenry nonsense. Ed’s Wally of the West debuted in OiNK much later in the run than I remember and now his mini-strips raise a laugh in every single issue. But Ed wasn’t content with just his regular characters, he’d also create lots of little random one-offs to be sprinkled throughout the 48 pages. Here are his best two from this issue.

With Ed rounding things off nicely for this month we’re back to waiting only four weeks until #67 of OiNK, the penultimate regular issue. We may be nearing the end but there’s still so much for this comic to give. This year really has flown in for me and I think part of the reason for that is OiNK. With those weeklies I flew through the winter and spring, and the summer has been one large Holiday Special after another. The next one will be reviewed here on Sunday 17th September 2023. September. Already!

iSSUE 65 < > iSSUE 67

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COMiNG UP: OiNK! #66

The Next Issue promo page in OiNK #65 elicited a level of excitement I didn’t know was still possible by this daft, silly comic after 35 years since publication and over two years of this read through. But Lew Stringer had an announcement to make and, alongside Pete Throb and his brilliant takes on Horace (Ugly Face) Watkins and Uncle Pigg, Pigswilla was the star and he was returning in the next issue with a huge nine-page strip! Although, “raunchy”? (That part would’ve been added by co-editor Patrick Gallagher.)

According to Lew this image was originally intended as a cover but was used in this context instead. A shame, but at least we got to see it. The strip itself was definitely one of the biggest highlights of these six monthly OiNKs. In fact, all of Lew’s strips in #66 are reasons to splash out on this issue if you see it on eBay, with Pete and his Pimple getting Lost in Space and Tom Thug making children’s humour comics history! Plus, one of the funniest OiNK strips ever comes from Kev F Sutherland, one I’ve been particularly looking forward to seeing again. You can see these highlights and more in the full review from Sunday 20th August 2023.

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