I know we should never give in to the bullies, the trolls, the people who think they own the things we talk about and attack us when we have an opinion that doesn’t match theirs. But sometimes we just have to look after our own mental health, you know? Last night I announced on socials I was taking a break from the blog, and initially this morning I was ready to walk away permanently. But now an outpouring of support has changed my mind. So I’m not going to let the bullies win. There’ll be no break, no walking away and I’m truly touched and feeling rather emotional today.

Let me explain what’s happened.

Yesterday I wrote about the Zzap!64 review of the OiNK game, which was all very positive, as was the one in C&VG magazine, and I myself had a fun experience with the game too. Because it didn’t tie in well (or at all) with OiNK it’s been disregarded in the decades since. I wanted to offer up a different opinion.

This was not met well (by just a few) on the OiNK Facebook Group.

It started off as only one individual, who saw how I liked something they didn’t and proceeded to break down every element of the thing I liked and tell me why it was terrible, and what games I should be praising instead (because they know better). If you’re active on social media sites like Twitter I’m sure you’ll be familiar with that scenario. I’m of the ilk that if someone likes something I don’t I’ll either just move on and let them continue to enjoy it, or I’ll engage and have a friendly chat and swap opinions and discuss like adults.

But hey, that’s just me.

I tried to explain we’re all entitled to our own opinions but they continued. Then they started to twist what I was saying, making it out like I was the one stating they couldn’t have a different opinion to mine. Talk about projection. I clarified several times, but they continued to the point where the praise they’d previously offered up about the blog itself suddenly changed; now the blog was “condescending” and they told me not to share it on the group anymore because I’m “thin-skinned”. In reality I was simply clarifying yet again (and again) that the way they commented wasn’t necessary in order to offer up a different opinion.

Then the personal attacks came.

They continued on to the point where I was so angry that I left the group (and I’ll admit I swore in one of my final comments), the group I was admin of. I was upset and angry that now my writing, my blog and my person were coming under attack after several comments from this person, and all because of a difference of opinion over a 35-year-old computer game. I explained how it had all made me feel and their reaction was a laughing emoji. Says it all, doesn’t it?

But here’s the thing, this morning I’ve woken up to “anonymous” comments on the blog (which obviously failed moderation), as well as DMs in my FB and Instagram accounts (ironically, not Twitter) and from a few different accounts. Whether the person on FB meant for this to happen or not isn’t the point, the fact is it’s happened and they started it, they opened the door to like-minded individuals who have now started on me with horrible personal attacks.

The thing is, these are meant to be pig pals! I thought our fanbase was better than this, that our fanbase was too small for this kind of thing! Well apparently it’s not. But the fanbase is definitely far too small for this to be ignored, for it not to affect me personally.

So I was originally coming on here to tell you all I was taking a break. I wasn’t even sure if the blog would return if these were some of the people who had been reading it, waiting in the wings to tear it all down when I like something they don’t (or maybe just to get their kicks now I’ve dared say all this). That’s what gets to me, they may only be a small handful of people, but they ARE some of the people that have been following the blog up to this point, because this blog isn’t anywhere near big enough in the grand scheme of things for it to be randomers.

But as I said, I won’t let them win, so the blog isn’t going anywhere and it’s not taking a break either. Their pathetic, childish, impudent comments will continue to be blocked on the blog. I wasn’t for returning to the FB group if certain people weren’t removed but speaking with so many wonderful people today who want me back, I am. It’s important we all look after our own mental health and I’ve thought long and hard about this. When I looked past the trolls I saw all of the supportive comments, thank you so much everyone! You’ve really brought a load of joy to the day, I’d no idea the blog was loved so much by so, so many of you! Three or four trolls versus the dozens upon dozens of you who took the time to reach out in support, it’s no competition!

This blog and the decent people following it (the vast majority minus a few numpties) have helped me through some really tough times this past year-and-a-bit. So to those who attacked me just because I dared voice an opinion that differed from yours, or because I stood up to one of your ilk, you’re not welcome here and I think I can comfortably say Uncle Pigg would feel the same. There’s a reason Tom Thug was the butt of the jokes in his strips and not the hero.

As for everyone else, see ya around >real< pig pals.

(Quick update a day later: The person who started this is now online saying he’s a victim of bullying because of this post, that I’m fragile and need mental help. I didn’t need any more proof of what I’m dealing with, but there it is anyway. Onwards and upwards. Time to mute, block and move on. There are funny comics to write about!)

PERSONAL POSTS

It’s very rare I write a personal post but this is well overdue. I want to make a public apology to two people, the owners of Coffee & Heroes in Belfast. Why public? I want Alan and Vicki to know I’m serious, there were also people in the shop’s community I considered friends and I want to reach out to them too, and I also think I need it for myself.

Last year I was increasingly paranoid and isolated over Covid. I hardly left the house, only to get food or for my weekly trip to Coffee & Heroes to spend an afternoon having plenty of laughs. It was a bit of normalcy, I could forget about the pandemic whilst knowing I was safe thanks to people I trusted. I’d started to see them outside the shop too (Alan and Vicki lived one street from me) and took trips to butchers and different supermarkets for nice food. (A lot of conversations with Vicki and regular coffee addict Roy revolved around this subject.)

Then Vicki informed me someone had reported the shop for allegedly breaking guidelines, which was ridiculous and just not true. I didn’t know who did that and I don’t want to know in case it was someone I liked, given what happened next. The Covid paranoia suddenly changed how I felt about the shop, a place I knew was safe and welcoming. We ended up in a horrible heated exchange over it. It was all my fault. This “paranoia” isn’t an excuse, the hermit-like state I’d got myself into was completely of my own doing. I couldn’t see it at the time though and I feel like shit for falling out and never returning to the shop.

My friends were worried too. They knew Coffee & Heroes had kept me going but now I became a recluse. It wasn’t healthy. Now I was never leaving the house because when I did I was so stressed out I felt ill. Going food shopping, something I used to enjoy, was an ordeal and panic-inducing. It got to the stage that several months later one of my closets friends (another Vicki) had to trick me into going out for lunch with her, telling me we were heading to her house and instead she drove us to a nice seaside cafe. I’ll admit it was really difficult but I knew I had to do it! I knew my life was messed up, my mental and physical health were deteriorating and I was just as worried about that as I was about Covid.

Bit by bit my friends helped me get my life back. I saw Bond in the cinema a day before the end of restrictions (not sure if me at the time would’ve gone later) and it really helped. So did Christmas with my friends. I now feel like life is returning to normal. I’m still being careful, I have vulnerable people in my life (so I mask up where advised, carry hand sanitiser and I’m boosted), but I’m also getting on with my life. Only recently I began going to big events again for the first time since this began and from one of them I actually did catch Covid. Ironically, getting the thing I’d tried so hard to avoid helped me gain the confidence I needed to get my life back. I’m being careful and trusting of those around me and life is good.

In other words, I kind of feel how I did every time I went to Coffee & Heroes! I’m happier, relaxed and trusting. If only I’d taken the example of those wonderful people in that shop and applied it to everything else. But anyway, I miss the shop, I miss the people and to Alan and Vicki I am truly sorry for what happened. None of this is meant to excuse any of my behaviour, just to explain what happened. And if it can help anyone still locked in that Covid fear, to show that you can get out of it, then that’s a bonus.

PERSONAL POSTS