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Comic Reviews, Death's Head

DEATH’S HEAD #9: HEAD WiTH A HEART

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With a cover by none other than the legendary Walt Simonson (Thor, Star Slammers, Jurassic Park) and Mark Farmer, the penultimate issue of Death’s Head contains no official warning that the comic was about to come to an end. There’s a bit of a hint on the editorial page which has a ’Next Issue’ panel in place of the usual subscriptions offers, not that readers at the time would’ve picked up on this as they’d have been too excited at the prospect of our Freelance Peace-Keeping Agent meeting Iron Man next month.

After a price rise last issue we got another one this month too, by 5p again. I remember the second half of 1988 and into 1989 my comics always seemed to be increasing in price, such were the struggles of an industry at a time when readerships were declining in the face of competition from television and computer games while production costs were soaring. Death’s Head would become a casualty of these changes soon enough but let’s enjoy the issue at hand first.

The editorial describes how last month The Doctor dropped off Death’s Head in the middle of Earth’s Dark Ages, which is actually 1989. Given writer Simon Furman‘s Dragon’s Claws took regular swipes at the 80s UK government (in the comic’s future vision of Britain) this could be more about accuracy than a quick joke. Simon is back after a month away from the comic and co-creator Geoff Senior finally makes a very welcome return as artist.

I didn’t even know the big rock guy
is the leader!

As you can see The Fantastic Four are the special guests this month. I’ll admit this is the first comic featuring them that I’ve ever read. I’ve never seen an issue of theirs and never saw the cartoons as a kid or any of the movies, so I really am going into this blind. I didn’t even know the big rock guy is the leader! It starts off very light-hearted with The Thing and The Human Torch bickering in a very superhero way.

Clobberin’ Time continues new editor Steve White’s brief time behind the wheel, with regulars Louise Cassell and Annie Halfacree on colours and letters respectively. That title soon becomes tiresome though. I understand it’s The Thing’s catchphrase but he uses it so frequently I feel like shouting, “Okay, okay, I get it, kids are meant to be copying him!” at the pages. Perhaps this is keeping within character but it’s just so annoying. What is good is the funny moment this sequence ends with, where it looks like they’ve made up.

Meanwhile, up on the roof someone isn’t too happy at being dropped off in the wrong time again, much like how he ended up in 8162 in the first place, even if he did settle in there and made it his (lucrative) home. However, not only is he out of time he’s also in precisely the wrong place as The Fantastic Four’s security system automatically opens fire. I have to say for the good guys their security system is very much shoot-first-and-ask-questions-later. Although it does lead to a laugh or two thanks to Death’s Head quips and his long-running bad luck.

Their building is a bit naff though, as huge holes are blasted open and its roof is destroyed as the automated weapons try and fail to take down Death’s Head. You’d think their HQ’s walls would be a bit more secure, that they’d stand up to their own security. But it’s all a bit of daft fun so we’ll not get caught up in the details (this isn’t Twitter). Using his rocket boots to fly through one of the aforementioned roof holes he finds himself in what could be described as their garage, full of hi-tech gadgets and transport.

Convinced this level of tech on 1980s Earth could mean they’d have access to a time machine, Death’s Head thinks aloud, “Just hope they’re nice, sane, normal people…” when he gets a rock hard tap on the shoulder. Meanwhile, back in the Los Angeles of 8162 Spratt is still fighting with their pet vulture (see #5) and takes another phone call from the mysterious woman in previous issues who’s been proclaiming she’s his business partner’s love. This time we also see part of her attire.

I’m still none the wiser although I’m assuming she must be a known character, given how she’s slowly being introduced. The Evil Dead’s Death Nell? If you remember the identity of the caller please don’t tell me in a comment or on socials; no spoilers! Hopefully I’ll find out in our final issue. As for this special crossover event it boils down to The Fantastic Four’s not-so-fantastic security program going rogue and dispatching a hovering droid to see off everyone.

At the beginning of the issue Reed Richards is working on one of the computer chips powering it and he was interrupted by the infighting, inadvertently making a mistake and corrupting the programming. At least this is the suggestion that’s thrown out by Reed, it’s never actually confirmed. With their bickering and the over-zealous zapping at Death’s Head having destroyed a lot of the building, it goes into full defensive mode.

During a protracted fight between the team and their new visitor it becomes clear that Death’s Head’s supposed fighting back is a case of mistaken identity. It was actually the computer attacking them but they were too busy assuming it was Death’s Head that they didn’t see the obvious. Between these reactions and the way their system was programmed I don’t have much faith in this superhero if my first impressions are anything to go by.

Eventually they calm down and think rationally, realising they need to team up with this comic’s lead character when Reed and The Invisible Woman’s child is put in danger. With Death’s Head being a mechanoid and able to hack the system that’s trying to kill them, soon it comes down to our ruthless hunter of bounties (I didn’t say it), a paid assassin, a mech programmed for self-preservation, to rescue a child.

The droid has handcuffed itself to the young boy in his bedroom, coldly using him as a bargaining chip. Now, our anti-hero isn’t exactly known for being subtle. Clicking a laser cutter onto his arm to snap the connection to the boy he leaps into the room and actually ends up damaging the droid and setting off its self-destruct! For a brief moment we see the Death’s Head we’d expect to see if this were any adult human, but it appears there’s a glimmer of a soul behind the facade.

That third image says it all and with the constant countdown you can feel the palpable sense of desperation in that penultimate panel. Superb, exciting stuff that Geoff’s penmanship is just perfect for. This may be the printed page but somehow he’s always able to make his art feel so animated when the script calls for it. After the umpteen pages of fighting earlier in the comic, after the build up in the story prior to this, this is single-handedly the most dramatic and exciting moment.

The panic it sets off is key to what’s next,
the story for our final issue

Yes, Death’s Head had to save the kid in order to gain access to their time machine but you can tell that’s not the reason he put his own life at risk. Ultimately though, this brave and heroic moment earns him the trust of The Fantastic Four and they set up their machine to take him back to 8162, a device that transports him in a green bar of energy from the feet up.

As he disappears, The Thing tells him that he had him all wrong, that the mech must be “what passes as a superhero in 8162”, to which Death’s Head tells him no, he was right all along. He then finally introduces himself by name and tells them what he does for a living…

This was a suitably funny final line for the character and the panic it sets off is key to what’s next, the story for our final issue. Back in the earlier days of reading Marvel UK’s Transformers for the blog’s Instagram the Machine Man of 2020 back up strip introduced a future-version of a certain main character in the publisher’s lineup. The hero’s identity had been completely taken over by another person. In the year 2020 Iron Man was no longer Tony Stark, he was Arno Stark.

No longer a hero, the Iron Man of 2020 was a mercenary-for-hire (which should make things interesting next month) and after being defeated by Machine Man he reappeared in a Spider-Man comic (also published in Transformers) when his family were held hostage by a killer and he had to travel back in time for the story’s resolution. The story ended in disaster, with Arno losing and seeing his city of the then-far future destroyed. His next appearance after that was in #10 of Death’s Head.

I knew Iron Man was to be the special guest star in the final issue but I had no idea it was this version and I’m super excited to see what happens. I really loved his two stories in Transformers. He was clearly the bad guy in his first appearance and for all intents and purposes was exactly the same when he returned. He was forced into a position of doing the right thing but in doing so went up against an actual hero, so young readers’ loyalties were tested. It made for fascinating reading.

I’m hoping for more of that kind of storytelling in Death’s Head next month. The pieces are certainly in place for an explosive finale and a suitably powerful send off for what has been a brilliant comic series. If it’s as good as it has been so far, and as good as those Iron Man of 2020 appearances were, then it’ll certainly take the edge off having to say goodbye. The final contract is on Monday 5th August 2024, right here.

iSSUE EiGHT < > iSSUE TEN

DEATH’S HEAD MENU

Comic Reviews, G.I. Joe, Transformers: Generation 2

G.i. JOE #139: TANKS FOR THE MEMORiES

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With this issue of G.I. Joe (or, to give it its full title, G.I. Joe starring Snake Eyes and Transformers: Generation 2 – phew!) we start down the path to the new Transformers series proper. There may only be one Cybertronian in the tale but it’s Megatron, so you know he’ll be centre stage. The cover by Chris Batista (Steel, 52, Robin) and Chip Wallace (The Legion, Justice League Task Force, Star Wars: X-Wing Rogue Squadron) sets the tone perfectly and throws a hint for both the plot and Megatron’s new body as Transformers fans wouldn’t have missed the fact he’s rather green and blue. More on that below.

As always with G.I. Joe the story is written by the legendary Larry Hama although this issue the art team are completely different. While pencils are by Chris, you’d swear it was another Andrew Wildman/Stephen Baskerville masterpiece but that could be because Stephen’s inking work is so identifiable. There are no less than three other inkers alongside him this month! They are Chip, Keith Williams (Alpha Flight, Action Comics, Sensational She-Hulk) and Donald Hudson (Punisher Kills the Marvel Universe, Forever Amber, Wolverine). Rick Parker and Bob Sharen return for letters and colours respectively, with Bob joined by Jurassic Park story editor Renée Witterstaetter (Silver Surfer, Jason Vs. Leatherface, Savage Sword of Conan). That’s a lot of people. So what are the results of their collective skills?

Personally, I think this opening spread is just incredible! Megatron’s savagery is spot on, and the pages may be a good bit smaller than those that UK Transformers fans were used to but the sense of scale is magnificent. He truly comes across as a terrifying entity. In their own comic it was easy to forget their size because in its later life it all but forgot about human characters (or being in disguise). Facing up against Cobra the might of Megatron feels palpable. I love the little details too in his openly damaged body, in the firepower hitting him and the cracks throughout his frame.

Scarlett is in bad shape after being stabbed by her love Snake Eyes last time, and despite what they saw Slice is still suspicious of her motives. The story kicks off with Cobra Commander making a run for it, aghast that Megatron would open fire when Cobra was just trying to make a deal with him. But as Zarana points out, what could a robot want? “It’s the currency we’re talking about, not the amount!”, realises Cobra Commander. Intriguing.

I just love big transformation pages and this is right up there with some of the best we ever saw in the Transformers comic. Megatron’s voice patterns are somewhat different than normal but it isn’t so drastically different as to take away from anything. He always did love the gravitas of his own voice. Him and the human leader here have that in common at least.

Doctor Biggles-Jones reckons her specially crafted Hyper-Velocity Rail Gun could go up against “that folding robot” (love that, it’s so close to swearing), noting that just because Megatron is alien tech doesn’t necessarily mean he is better tech. She grabs a H.I.S.S. Tank with the gun attached and let’s rip on the Decepticon leader. It hits him but goes straight through with such velocity that it continues travelling until it’s outside of Earth’s atmosphere!

The action is great so far. It does calm down after this to focus more on the negotiations between Cobra Commander and Megatron, which are just as entertaining to read, but the first handful of pages are quite breathtaking in their relentlessness. The only thing that’s ever so annoying is the American comic’s insistence to shove adverts on to nearly every-other page, interrupting the flow somewhat.

Convinced the technology is of alien original, Megatron goes in for a closer look, grabs the doctor and squeezes her. It looks like she’s about to die when a voice calls out. Pausing momentarily to listen to Cobra Commander, Megatron is told that the “fleshling” he now holds is the designer of the very-human weapon that damaged him. Instantly, Megatron changes his tune about negotiating. 

Acknowledging that these particular humans could actually have the ability to repair and upgrade his damaged body, a deal is struck. There’s a palpable sense of foreboding to this collaboration, one we know won’t be of mutual trust. As the issue goes on, both leaders’ inner thoughts betray their intentions to the reader while their outer speech is cleverly worded to twist those thoughts for the benefit of their partner-in-crime. Larry Hama is just superb at writing this pairing.

Meanwhile, up in the air in their C-130 the Joes, Destro and the Baroness are making their way home. Snake Eyes and Destro are two of my favourite characters (alongside Scarlett and Stalker, also featured in this crossover) so to see them together in Scarlett’s undercover and Destro’s defection storylines is a joy. I just wish I had more issues to enjoy this to the full. (Thankfully that’ll soon be rectified.)

While this storyline continues we pop in on Cobra Commander and Megatron to see how their deal is shaping up, in an image that brings back memories of the first live-action Transformers movie with Megatron surrounded by scaffolding (albeit not in cryostasis this time). I knew going in that Cobra was responsible for rebuilding him (while the Joes were responsible for killing Bumblebee in the American continuity – in ours it was Death’s Head) but I was worried about how that would be depicted. I shouldn’t have been concerned.

Zarana’s vapour-inducing thought on the next page is that they should keep on dismantling Megatron so they can change the deal completely in their favour, however Cobra Commander shuts down the idea, at least until they get their hands on the goodies aboard The Ark. Unbeknownst to them (although surely you would assume) Megatron is listening in and simply smirks to himself.

Doctor Biggles-Jones is a character I’d never seen before until reading the previous issue, so I’ve no idea how long she’s been in the comic or anything about her background. She’s a technical wizard to put it very mildly, responsible for the most destructive of Cobra’s weaponry, and now the rail gun that damaged the giant Cybertronian is going to be installed in him, replacing his previous arm cannon. Things are building nicely towards Generation 2.

Biggles-Jones heads off to stop Slice from killing Scarlett after it’s confirmed the stabbing by Snake Eyes wasn’t accidentally non-fatal, it had been done with precision. Meanwhile, Destro and the Baroness have been taken back to Cobra Island by the Joes which at some point has been abandoned. Again, this is something I’ve missed between the time the stories appeared in Marvel UK’s Transformers and this. They’re rather shocked to find Cobra Commander waiting for them! Until, that is, he starts to glow and change…

… into Zartan, the master of disguise. His “new image” is clearly a reference to a new toy model Hasbro had created for him, and it’s clever of Larry to write in a quick panel or two to show readers (particularly this one who wasn’t aware of the change) his original look. All reacquainted now, Hawk explains why they’ve all been brought here.

On one side of the island is a cave that’s permanently on fire. Apparently when they left the island Cobra had drilled down to an oil deposit and lit it. Zartan mourns the loss of life, the bodies inside unrecoverable ash. That is, unrecoverable without Dr. Mindbender’s Brainwave Scanner and cloning vat, the former being an infamous device in the comic’s lore used to torture more than a few Joes. His cloning vat is missing, which had been used to create Serpentor from the remains of the greatest military leaders in history and resurrect Storm Shadow, both stories I remember fondly from Transformers.

There’s a funny moment here when Destro laments the fact Mindbender’s warped genius wasn’t used to resurrect Newton, Da Vinci or Einstein, while the Baroness would have preferred Elvis! There’s a passing mention of Mindbender having died but his body could’ve been moved along with a computer program able to resurrect the man himself. Having read IDW’s continuation of the story decades later in which Mindbender turns himself into a mad, mobile, weaponised computer system (yes, really) I’m assuming this is the start of bringing that character back into the comic.

To finish off this month’s chapter we return to the headline event for Transformers fans as a door slides open at Cobra’s current base and a huge green and purple tank rolls out. It makes light work of three H.I.S.S. tanks; we see its artillery slice through them like butter and continue out the other sides of them. This means it’s equipped with the rail gun, which means this is the new alt mode for Megatron! In case there was any doubt the tank shifts and changes on the next page to reveal his new body.

I have to say I really like the new look! It suits him. Cobra Commander gets a rude awakening as he realises Megatron could hear what they were saying all along. Yes, they’d only been praising the doctor on her great work a distance away from the test, but it means Megatron heard everything earlier too. How will this affect their deal or their mutual distrust of each other? We’ll find out soon I’m sure.

After he gives a quick run down of his stats the story ends with Megatron telling them his sensor arrays have located an experiment in the basement of the castle. Cobra Commander tries to dismiss it but Megatron warns him it’s started breathing… and we see Dr. Mindbender suspended in liquid with electrodes attached to his naked body. I knew it. Just to finish off, we’ll take a look at the back page advert which once again places the comic in the timeline of my life.

I remember all the fuss over Mortal Kombat at the time but I’d never been a fan of one-on-one beat-‘em-up games (I’m still not) and when a friend rented out a copy for his Mega Drive from the local video store we were both left feeling rather “meh” about it. That didn’t stop shows like GamesMaster and Bad Influence wetting themselves on an almost weekly basis over it though, or the British press making a whole overblown hoo-ha over its unconvincing digitised gore.

Not only have I enjoyed the Transformers aspects of this issue, it’s been a blast to read new (for me) adventures of the Joes and Cobra. Recently on the blog I’ve written about Skybound Entertainment’s Kickstarter in which they’ll be collecting the whole of Marvel’s run in a gorgeous hardback collection. These two issues so far have really whetted my appetite for that collection to arrive next year. For now though, I’ll look forward to the next part of this particular story in #140 of G.I. Joe, which you’ll see reviewed here on Sunday 28th July 2024.

iSSUE 138 < > iSSUE 140

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Comic Reviews, The Sleeze Brothers

THE SLEEZE BROTHERS #1: A BREATH OF (BOTTLED) FRESH AiR

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I can remember the day I bought this issue of Marvel UK’s (under the Epic Comics imprint) new monthly, The Sleeze Brothers. Sitting in my Aunt May’s house with my mum certain images were seared onto my retinas, in particular the strip’s title spread you’ll see further below. It’s been months since the brothers popped up in Doctor Who Magazine, so just how will they translate to full 22-page stories? Incredibly well is the answer to that.

The editorial is ‘written’ by a stereotypical Huggy Bear-type called Papa Beatbox, some form of MC who gives us a sort of origin story for El’ Ape and Deadbeat. Discarded test tube babies, Beatbox raised them as if they were his own and, despite their gruff, selfish, greedy exteriors they apparently have insides of pure gold. We’ll see about that. 

I didn’t realise Dan Abnett (Knights of Pendragon, Nova, Sinister Dexter) was associate editor until now. As I list those credited with working on The Sleeze Brothers I won’t be mentioning The Real Ghostbusters after their individual names. Just take it for granted that whoever I mention also worked on that comic unless I say otherwise! This was the main reason I loved this issue so much as a kid and why I’ve been really looking forward to it on the blog, because that aforementioned comic was such a childhood favourite.

Only a few pages in and the art team have definitely nailed it

So anyway, on to our strip which is called Nice ’n’ Sleazy. Written by John Carnell (Doctor Who, DC’s Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy comic) and pencilled by Andy Lanning (Digitek, Nova, Death’s Head II), they also created these characters. Inks are by Dave Hine (Zoids, Mambo, X-Men), colours are by Steve White (Xenozoic Tales, Transformers, editor on Visionaries, Havoc and Death’s Head), letters are by Bambos Georgiou (Slimer, co-creator of Speakeasy and Aces Weekly) and it’s all edited by Richard Starkings (Death’s Head, Dragon’s Claws, Elephantmen) who designed the comic’s logo and chatted with me in the introductory post about the comic’s creation and the Epic label.

After the plethora of artists behind the Doctor Who strip, the comic settles into its art style and I’m loving it from the very first page. This future world is so intricately designed by Andy, and he and Dave are an excellent partnership in bringing out all of the fun details, with Steve’s bright and often gaudy colours really making the pages pop more than anything I’ve read on the blog so far. Only a few pages in and the art team have definitely nailed it. What about the plot?

It’s a simple story but it’s the first issue so it’s main purpose is to introduce the main characters and the world in which they inhabit, with all of its grime, corruption, many and varied alien life forms and the comedic ineptitude of everyone (and everything – we see a police robot forget its directives mid-arrest) that make up the Earth of the future. The Sleeze Brothers actually get involved by accident here, when Finkelly lets a key witness against the Cosmos Father escape and, backed into a corner by his goons, he spots a flyer for the brothers’ detective agency (which doubles as the front cover) and pretends like he knows them.

We then get to meet up with El’ Ape and Deadbeat as they bust in on a husband partaking in some very extracurricular activity. This is the spread I mentioned above and I think you’ll be able to see why it was so memorable to my young eyes! I love the little details here too, such as El’ Ape’s pin badges, the fact we see the photo Deadbeat takes sliding out of the camera and even the husband’s surprised look reflected in El’ Ape’s sunglasses.

Thinking this proves that being private detectives is paying off, El’ Ape’s excitement is cooled when Deadbeat reminds him how much the camera, film and skeleton keys cost, then their last few remaining notes are ripped from his hands by their landlord. Deadbeat is sure they’re not going to earn enough in this line of work but El’ Ape is optimistic and says something always turns up “in these types of stories”. Is this a hint that they’re acknowledging being inside a comic? Even if it’s not, it’s funny.

Back in their office we meet Doris, their receptionist. Well, sort of. You see, she’s a computer and, despite this being set in the far future, Doris is an antiquated desktop complete with cassette deck, so completely unable to move about and do much of a receptionist’s job. She’s just one example of the insane characters John and Andy come up with throughout the issue.

Finkelly hires them to find his twin brother, showing them a picture of the runaway witness and obviously they look nothing like each other. “He parts his hair on a different side to me”, explains Finkelly. This and a suitcase full of cash is enough to convince the Sleezes the case is legit, despite Doris calling them out on it. Yes, these two aren’t exactly the sharpest, just in case you missed their misadventure with the Doctor.

In a scene that reminds me of a funny page in #5 of Death’s Head they start asking around and run into a whole bunch of weird and wacky folk, giving Andy a chance to draw up a variety of inhabitants of the city. This page should give you some indication of the imagination on show throughout the comic and this is only the beginning. Unsurprisingly, asking random strangers doesn’t work out. Without any other ideas they head off to Wong’s Air Bar.

The Air Bar plays up to our legitimate worries of climate change, hypothesising that in the future fresh air is such a luxury it’s bottled up inside pressurised bottles and sold like beer. Not that alcohol is in short supply either, El’ Ape throwing about the cash from their suitcase as if they’ve already solved the case. When the photo accidentally falls out the bar’s proprietor is able to point them in the right direction at last (after some eyes-down-the-barrel-of-a-gun persuasion).

I have to say I laughed at this panel above. The city is very much a spoof of Judge Dredd’s MegaCity One. As well as the so-called “undercover C.O.P.S.” (neither undercover nor decent cops) the brothers’ car is just a Volkswagon Beetle with hovercraft piping instead of wheels, delivery trucks use the same configuration and on other pages we see regular electrical sockets and other contemporary technology, giving it a lovely feel of a future world poking fun at the depictions of the future seen in 80s movies of the day.

The biggest thing that’s purposely out of place for me are public phone boxes (and not a mobile in sight). Here, Deadbeat explains all the technological security these have in order to stop tampering, theft, fee dodging etc., all of which he bypasses by simply sticking a bit of chewing gum on one of its parts. “Oldest trick in the book”, he says. Placing a call to several delivery companies for the building housing their target (that uncanny resemblance to a frog above), it’s bombarded with trucks which keeps the police occupied. The two-headed chief calls for phone line repairmen, who of course end up being the brothers in disguise. It’s a ridiculously convoluted plan and I love it. Although, they’re quickly caught by one of those inept RoboCops.

So that’s two oldest tricks in the book. The ludicrousness of this future world is what has delighted me the most. I had it in my head that the world itself would be more like that in Death’s Head, with some background gags and funny social commentary but for the most part it would play the straight guy to the main characters’ comedy. But in fact the inept duo, one being a loud mouth reactionary and one quiet and thoughtful, are actually the closest we get to normality. And that’s saying something!

Through a chase involving a comedy of errors our detectives catch up with the witness. Not that they know he’s a witness. Cornered and terrified, he whimpers at the end of a back alley while El’ Ape and Deadwood approach. El’ Ape grins. Deadwood is stoney faced as per usual. He clicks open his briefcase and it looks like a professional hit to the defenceless victim, until we see what Deadbeat was reaching for. What happens next over a double-page spread at the end of our story perfectly sums up the humour of the comic.

It’s been a wild and crazy ride and this is only the first issue. You’d be hard pushed to find a comic with a premiere issue that works as perfectly as this one. It feels like a fully developed comic, as if this were the sixth or so issue in its run. Of course, with a predetermined length of only six issues John and Andy had to hit the ground running. They’ve sprinted! Every page is packed full of fun, every gag lands, the leads feel fully formed and the world in which they inhabit is just as big a character as they are.

Let’s hope the remaining issues over the course of the rest of this year live up to the exceptionally high standard this premiere has laid out. It’s also got me thinking about finally finishing off my collection of The Real Ghostbusters to enjoy more of John’s and Andy’s work after this read through is finished. For now I’ll look forward to whatever they have in store for The Sleeze Brothers #2, which will be reviewed right here on the blog on Monday 29th July 2024.

DOCTOR WHO MAGAZiNE 147 < > iSSUE TWO

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Aliens, Comic Reviews

ALiENS #1: STOP YOUR GRiNNiN’ AND DROP YOUR LiNEN

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Off we go with the latest real time read through and this one is rather different than anything that’s been covered on the blog so far, being the first aimed at a mature audience. After licensing their Aliens comics to Trident in the UK, Dark Horse US decided to set up shop in London and print their strips in their own titles. Thus Dark Horse International was created. This was their first, and flagship, title.

I’ve already covered one of their comics. Jurassic Park not only adapted the movie into comic form it also contained the first ever official sequel to the film and book. Similarly, Dark Horse US’ Aliens continued the story of James Cameron’s amazing hit movie and lasted for decades, only coming to an end in recent years when Marvel rebooted it now that Disney owns both the comic publisher and 20th Century, the company behind the films.

As much as I do love the new Marvel series (it really is superb) I’ve been really excited to sink my teeth (just the one set) into these original stories. As explained in the introductory post I’m concentrating on the comics after Dark Horse International took over with Volume Two. At least for now. This is because these were the comics my friends collected at the time and the one I owned was part of this series too. So let’s get down to reliving it.

After John Bolton’s (Hellraiser, Man-Bat, The Evil Dead, and one of the first British artists to work on American comics) incredible, exclusive new front cover the editorial welcomes us to Dark Horse’s vision of what an Aliens comic should be, with Jurassic Park editor Dick Hansom given the title of ‘New Bug’. To place the comic in its time you can see Alien³’s release was imminent and in fact Dark Horse would publish a three-weekly, three-part (bit of a theme there) special series to commemorate. More on that movie as we go along.

So the first strip in the read through is Hive, part one of which takes up 20 pages. Altogether there are 52 pages with a good quality gloss cover and a matt stock inside, all in colour apart from the occasional advert. There’s also a 16-page Predator back up and a good selection of features, the overall format making it a very UK comic indeed. Let’s get started with Hive first of all. In the States each story was released as a mini-series whereas here they’d be printed in an ongoing comic, much like Jurassic Park. It opens with this scene-setting spread below.

This is the perfect opening for the first issue, feeling very much like the movie, complete with the heroine having a somewhat Sigourney Weaver-esque look. The Alien is brilliantly realised by Kelley Jones (The Sandman, Batman: Endgame, Micronauts), with Les Dorscheid’s (Dungeons & Dragons, Deadman, Nazz) muted colours adding to the atmosphere and Clem Robins‘(Amazing Spider-Man, Ghost Rider, Guardians of the Galaxy) letters. Of course in the film the Aliens are black, but conveying that in comic form can be difficult. Les’ use of colours here is inspired, fooling us into accepting this creature as black even though it has to be coloured differently for its details to stand out on the page.

Jerry Prosser’s (The Crow, Predator, editor on Sin City: A Dame to Kill For) story begins with Julian Lish trying to escape from an Alien in a scene that could’ve been lifted straight from the movie with its tight, dark corridors, motion tracking sensors and in the end the alien’s second jaw sliding out for the kill. That is, until an “Override Code” is announced over a loudspeaker and it just… stops.

This is Dr. Stan Mayakovsky and any initial confusion you might feel from this turn of events was echoed by me. That’s the whole point. He enters with his dog in tow who seems completely nonplussed with the H.R. Giger creation standing over them. What happens next continued the confusion as the dog drops their ball from their slobbery mouth and it rolls underneath the alien’s legs.

Didn’t expect that, did you? What with this bit of alien playfulness and our two human characters just standing next to it, even after it looked like Julian was about to be its victim, something is obviously amiss. (It hadn’t been released yet, but the dog in the original cut of Alien³ certainly didn’t get this treatment!) On the next page the alien sizes up to the professor, baring its teeth and hissing, my mind instantly remembering the accompanying scary sound from the films. Then it takes off down the corridor and… well…

I admit I laughed at this! And laughter is not something I thought this comic would produce a lot of. Yes, the film had its moments but those definitely didn’t come from the alien side of things. It does explain things though with its clearly robotic speech bubble. As ridiculous as it sounds to have a robotic alien in the story we must remember this is set in a future where completely convincing human androids also exist, so why not?

We get an insight into his addiction to a particular drug, a raw form of the slime produced by the aliens

The question is, why exactly has this thing been created? Not only that, but it’s being trained to hunt humans, or at the very least act convincingly like a killer. Called XL1, an out-of-breath Julian tells Stan it keeps getting better, that she’s struggling to stay ahead of it anymore, which pleases Stan immensely. However, Julian wonders what 10,000 of them would be like! It’s a terrifying thought and we know that the plans of greedy humans always lead to disaster in the film series. So what’s the reasoning?

It’s not clear yet if the professor works for the Weyland-Yutani Corporation from the films but we do get an insight into his addiction to a particular drug, a raw form of the slime (or “jelly” as it’s called here) produced by the aliens. It relieves his cancer symptoms and puts him into a sort of trance state where time slows down, his world goes blue and he revisits his memories of how he got to this point. It’s essentially a bit of exposition for the readers.

Having to buy the substance from drug dealers, he eventually met Julian and devised a plan to build an alien android to infiltrate a hive (that explains the reference to thousand of aliens and the title) and bring back the jelly. Stan is in it for himself, Julian appears to be in it for the money, and their mutual desire for the same outcome results in a passionate, mutually selfish love affair. Using the example of ants above and the aforementioned ability to make convincing androids, it’s an interesting set up for the first story in the comic series. There’s also a funny moment when Julian even suggests naming their alien ‘Norbert’!

In their ship The Dolomite they take a crew to a far-flung planet called A6 454 upon which humans have never set foot, and Stan and Julian stand up in front of their crew and ask for volunteers before showing them what they’re there for. As a bit of foreshadowing, revealing their android goes horribly wrong. Not that either seems to care.

I remember seeing scenes like this when I flicked through my friend’s Aliens comics as a teenager and being amazed it could show such images. I’d never seen anything like this in comics before. Anyway, Stan finally uses his override command to stop his android from continuing its killing spree and the final image of the strip has it holding another man’s head and looking directly at Stan. Whether this is where the original first part ended in the US comic or this is where the UK’s comic has cut it off is difficult to say, although the sudden end makes it feel more like the latter.

The first part of Hive is intriguing, full of atmosphere, has plenty of horrific moments and really sucked me into its world. It’s a fantastic start to the comic and this already has the potential to be an excellent read through. As a teen it was no wonder I loved the one issue I picked up if this is anything to go by. It would’ve shocked and scared me, and I would’ve been loving every page of it. Before moving on to the back up strip there’s a bit of news in The Motion Tracker segment and a middle-page spread about the making of Alien³.

I wonder if anyone actually went and rented The Commitments back then just to get a glimpse of the film? It’s interesting that there was a different direction for the film originally planned, so much so that a teaser was made. The Unnatural Selection spread isn’t the easiest to read but it does explain a lot of the infamous difficulties in making Alien³. I’m particularly interested in the various writers and script drafts and the evolution (hence the subtitle) of the story over the years before filming began. If this is an indication of the extras the comic will contain I can’t wait for future issues.

In case you’re wondering, the “Free Comic” on the cover is a sequel to Frank Miller and Dave Gibbons’ Give Me Liberty (which I’d never heard of until now despite it being a best seller) and nothing to do with the Aliens franchise. While the Predator movies would eventually cross over into the Aliens universe, at the time they had nothing to do with the franchise either. However, in comics they were always closely related and thus a perfect choice of back up strip.

Predator: Cold War is written by Mark Verheiden (Phantom, co-executive producer on Battlestar Galactica and Falling Skies), with pencils by Ron Randall (The Dreaming, Action Comics, Supergirl), inks by Steve Mitchell (Aquaman, Batman, G.I. Joe), colours by Chris Chalenor (Barb Wire, The Mask, Hieroglyph) and Rachelle Menashe (The Terminator, Icon, Virus), and letters are by Clem Robins again. Lieutenant Ligachev has been promoted by a General of her army just so he could send her to take charge of an oil field pumping station in the middle of the Siberian nowhere. When their equipment discovers large seismic activity accompanied by high levels of radiation they go to investigate, discovering the decapitated body of a local deer herder, strung up on a pole as if he’s on display, like an animal at the end of a successful hunt.

Soon they’re under attack by a Predator and, upon being hit and half buried in the snow, Ligachev can only watch as her young team are cut down one-by-one by this strange creature. Setting the beginning of the story in desolate ice fields adds a level of desperation to her plight but we soon find out she’s recounting it to a military tribunal who wants to send her back! 

If this is anything like Aliens then she’s probably being sent back out to face certain death in order for the government (rather than a private company) to get access to powerful weapons. As someone who has only ever seen the second movie a long, long time ago this plays out like a typical 80s monster movie, which is no bad thing of course. More interesting is how the rest of this 16-page chunk of the story tries hard to tie it in closer to the film series.

The American military have picked up on the weapons fire and automatically assumed the Soviets were test-firing nuclear weapons, so they reach out to General Philips. He was played by R.G. Armstrong in the first film although here he’s described as having something to do with the “business in New York last summer” and I’m not sure what that’s in reference to. After all, the first film was set in Central America and the second in Los Angeles.

A second character, a New York sheriff, is seen having flashbacks to being attacked by a Predator (while at the dentist no less, so double the horror!) so maybe it’s in reference to an earlier Predator comic, perhaps one printed in Trident’s first volume. Meanwhile, the general goes to meet a Detective Schaefer who turns out to be the brother of Arnold Schwarzenegger’s character Dutch, still M.I.A. from the first film. As you can see he’s drawn as another version of Arnie and basically feels like a way of getting the big name star into the strip without actually doing so.

So far, as someone who knows next to nothing about Predator the opening scenes were exciting but the introduction of Schaefer feels a bit like the Jurassic Park comic’s own desperate attempt to get another character from the film into its sequel strip, when it reintroduced Robert Muldoon who had clearly been killed by the Velociraptors in the movie. I’ll not dwell. Going into the Predator strips essentially blind means I can just enjoy them for what they are.

Towards the rear of the comic are three pages detailing some of the weaponry used by the Colonial Marines in the Aliens movie. For fictional weapons the Technical Readout really does go into a lot of detail. If this is the beginning of the comic adding some background depth to not only itself but also the universe of the films then it’s another great start. These pages bring back exciting memories of their onscreen use, especially the M56 Smart Gun as used by Jenette Goldstein’s Vasquez character, decades before “smart” devices became the things to own.

Finally, just as in Jurassic Park (and many Marvel UK comics) we get a comics checklist, although at this stage Aliens was Dark Horse International’s only UK title so it focusses solely on the imported comics available in specialist comics shops. These weren’t as easily found at the time (Northern Ireland only had two such shops back then) so for most of us these were beyond our reach. It’ll be interesting to see this develop as the company settled (at least temporarily) into this part of the world.

With that we come to the end of the first issue and it’s off to a cracking start. The Aliens strip itself is fantastic and it hasn’t really got going yet, but the set up has plenty of potential for things to go horribly wrong for the cocky humans. Predator is also enjoyable and might be more so once I actually watch the films (which I now want to do, so that’s another good point) and the extras are interesting. Lots of potential here. This is a lengthy read through that’ll take us all the way to March 2026, so settle in and come back on Tuesday 23rd July 2024 for the next instalment.

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Created by master of mirth Lew Stringer, Barmy Comix was released for free online in 2020 in response to a delay in the publication of his next Combat Colin comic due to Covid. Bringing some much needed cheer to a locked down world when access to new comics was impossible, it has 32 pages (or screens) of strips taken from various publications in the Lewniverse, including a nine-page preview of the next issue of Combat Colin.

That’s not all from the moronic militia man though. There’s a classic from the Transformers days, when Lew’s strips were at their height later in the run with Day of the Gunge, a strip I fondly remember reading first time around when I was a much smaller human. There’s also a full-colour adventure with Colin and Semi-Automatic Steve I hadn’t read before from the pages of Aces Weekly. This on its own is worth the price of entry. Not that there is any price, but you get my drift.

Loose Brayne, aka Brickman is in here too. It’s quite possibly the barmiest strip of the whole comic and that’s certainly saying something. The Brickman Meets The Mad Cobbler is classic Lew turned up to ten. I love the character of Albert and on the next page we see that it’s actually the big fancy house, Brayne Manor, that sits in a cave while Brickman’s supposedly secret lair is above ground for all to see.

This should give you some idea of the chaos to expect if you’ve never read a Brickman strip before. Set in “Pre-Holocaust Thatcherite Britain” it’s an ingenious mix of slapstick, social commentary and daft gags. It’s probably my favourite out of the whole issue. Saying that, there’s also a second story of his, Brickman and Trowel Meet Professor Deranged! Nothing subtle about the villain names in this comic.

Derek the Troll’s strip takes the form of one of those Make-Your-Own-Adventure books we had as kids (OiNK had its own version back in #5). Derek was originally created for role-playing magazine Warlock and that’s where this strip comes from. Lew has also released a comic reprinting all of Derek’s misadventures which I’ve already reviewed on the blog and (spoiler) enjoyed immensely.

Derek the Troll’s ‘orrible Troll-Playing Game is almost impossible to win, throwing a spanner in the works every time you think you’ve made the right decision, its curveballs and surprises keeping you laughing all the way to the end. There are also two full-colour strips of Derek’s from the short-lived digital comic Goof and he’s the star of one of the mini-posters scattered throughout Barmy Comix, ready to be printed out and Blu-Tac’ed to your wall if you’re feeling particularly nostalgic.

One creation of Lew’s I’d never heard of before reading this comic during the pandemic was Pedantic Stan the Comics Fan. Co-created with former Marvel UK editor and the utter gentleman behind comics news site Down the Tubes John Freeman, he was created for comic newspaper Speakeasy in the 1990s (an earlier edition of which has already appeared on the blog). Lew has also released the complete collection of Stan’s strips in a small, landscape format comic which was a hoot to read. It’s been a while since I’ve read it so it was fun to see his Full-Page Christmas Special again.

Also in here is a touching strip from the Undefeated Spirit of Hope book released in 2011 in the wake of the natural disasters in New Zealand and Japan of that year, finishing off the comic on the back page. Altogether this has reminded me of The Marvel Bumper Comic, which introduced me to comics and characters I hadn’t previously read among a mix of hugely enjoyable, hand-picked reprints of some of my favourites.

Barmy Comix was (and still is) free although Lew does ask fans if they could donate a small sum of £2.00 towards the creation of future comics in his range. This was particularly relevant during the pandemic but it’s such a small ask in return for the many laughs we get from each and every one of his publications. To download it just click on the link below to Lew’s own blog and please do remember to donate.

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