KNOW YOUR OiNK!: CARTOONiSTS’ PROFiLES

This is a nice little bonus post even if I do say so myself. Although I can’t take any of the credit, that must go to ten of OiNK’s top contributors who each decided to tell us a little bit about themselves in the second Holiday Special, released in March 1988. Sprinkled throughout the issue were fun little quarter-page profiles containing a self-portrait of some sort and a description of the cartoonist or editor in their own words.

The last part of that sentence is key. Don’t be expecting any actual real information here. This is OiNK after all. If you chose ten of its talented team and asked them to tell the readers something interesting about themselves do you really think they’d waste that opportunity with actual facts? Or would you prefer they took the chance to use their unique senses of humour to have a laugh instead? It’s a no brainer. Let’s kick things off with the three people responsible for OiNK in the first place, shall we? Here are the comic’s creators and editors. These were the people in charge!

I particularly like Patrick Gallagher’s pen name and his unique way of presenting his age, and it’s hilarious to have the incredibly talented Mark Rodgers’ profile presented as so amateurish. Tony Husband’s artistic depiction of himself is so funny but poor Paul Husband! If you take a look at the very first OiNK, the special preview issue, you’ll see he doesn’t actually look like Horace (Ugly Face) Watkins. If readers had wanted to see what all three of these individuals really looked like they would’ve had to check out the article in Crash magazine from the previous year.

As a kid I never knew of Crash (or the unique free edition of our comic tucked away inside that issue), so as far as I was concerned these profiles were the closest I was going to get to really knowing those who made us laugh so much. As a kid I had no idea it was Patrick and Mark who had appeared in photo stories such as Castaway and Star Truck previously. The latter also starred Tony albeit behind an evil alien (chicken) mask,  but we never knew who they were in those strips. That’s what makes these silly not-so-fact files so funny of course; this is how readers would imagine the amazing talent behind the comic. It’s just a shame we didn’t get more!

Ian Jackson is synonymous with OiNK and did appear in a photo story alongside Mark way back in the Valentines issue but, like Tony, he was behind expensive (not really) alien special effects. In fact it was only two years ago, not long after I started this website, when John Freeman‘s Down the Tubes website published a spotlight article about Ian that I finally found out what the person behind Uncle Pigg, Mary Lighthouse and Hadrian Vile looks like.

This imaginative profile not only sums up his wacky sense of humour with far-fetched nonsense, he also manages to highlight the truth about being a cartoonist

Marc Riley appeared as another anonymous kind-of-actor in Star Truck but was probably best known for portraying Snatcher Sam during the first year of the comic and The OiNK! Book 1988. The grisly world of punk rock he refers to is The Fall, the band he was a part of for four years between 1978 and 1982 before forming The Creepers. Of course, Frank Sidebottom needs no introduction or indeed a silly drawing! We all knew him from countless children’s television appearances already and the man behind the papier-mâché, Chris Sievey, was always so brilliant with his fans that of course he’d take any opportunity to give them a chance to get in touch directly.

Below is David Haldane’s profile, he of Hugo the Hungry Hippo, Rubbish Man and Torture Twins fame and this imaginative profile not only sums up his wacky sense of humour with far-fetched nonsense, he also manages to highlight the truth about being a cartoonist! Then Steve Gibson, who’d go on to produce a range of very adult comics after OiNK brings us a depiction of himself that’s really rather disturbing and perfectly illustrates (no pun intended) his art style. If you’re interested in a full-page strip of that Judge Pigg he’s drawing then check out the review for #58.

Quite a few years ago now, perhaps about a decade back I had the pleasure of meeting Davy Francis a few weeks before Christmas and had the chance to purchase some of his original OiNK artwork which currently takes pride of place on my wall. I didn’t even know he lived in Belfast like me until I was at a film festival earlier that year, and while chatting about comics to someone and mentioning OiNK they told me they knew Davy. An absolute gent with a brilliant sense of humour and an incredible caricaturist his contribution here keeps to the theme of telling us absolutely nothing about him and instead giving us a good chuckle.

Like Ian and David, Davy works his usual signature into his profile so readers can instantly recognise who this is and then we finish the Holiday Special off with Davy’s good friend Ed McHenry. The drawing in Ed’s is in my mind probably the most accurate, based on my completely unknowledgeable assumptions about cartoonists’ work areas. I really like how he’s tried to incorporate as many of the little random details from his description into the drawing too, it’s packed full of little sight gags and details. Absolutely classic Ed.

A few months after the special one more profile appeared in one of the monthly issues, OiNK #66. While it got my hopes up there’d be more in future issues this was sadly the last but it’s a nice little bonus. Especially since it’s by one of my favourite cartoonists of all time and was in an issue where he contributed almost a third of the contents! Lew Stringer is very much a child of the 60s and plays up to that here, beginning with the profile number being made up of three key 60s movie/TV/comic series. I just wish I’d thought of his excuse for why I sucked at school sports!

There we go. Don’t you feel completely informed about who made the funniest comic of all time? Me neither. Or maybe we should. The details may not be entirely accurate but they portray the sense of humour OiNK encapsulated, the craziness and imagination that captivated us and the combination of comic talent that was like no other. These great profiles inside the second OiNK Holiday Special may not have been an introduction to these cartoonists, but they could very well be the perfect introduction to OiNK itself.

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THE LOST WORLD JURASSiC PARK #3: TRiMMiNG DOWN THE T-REX

We’re already at the halfway point in this little mini-series adaptation of The Lost World Jurassic Park. The first issue fell into the traps of many a movie adaptation but part two improved things somewhat. It wasn’t perfect, but those improvements and the article from writer Don McGregor about the size of the task at hand gave me high hopes for what was to come. So how has our third edition panned out? Ignoring that annoying “Free” poster bit on the cover (see last issue for more on that) let’s get stuck in and find out.

We left things a fortnight ago with the Triceratops smashing its way through Peter Ludlow’s presentation tent after Nick Van Owen had freed the dinosaurs, and right at the beginning of this chapter we see a spectacular scene of them all running from the camp back into the wild. In the movie we saw this from the perspective of the humans as the animals fled all around them, but here I particularly like the grander scale this first panel brings, and that’s not something you can often say about a comic adaptation.

Upon further inspection though, how on Earth did the Ingen hunters possibly capture and contain that giant dinosaur on the left? If we go by the previous movie this would have to be a Brachiosaurus. I’d love to have seen the cage they kept that in! The rest of the page instantly contradicts not only the film but even its own previous issue, where it had correctly shown the baby Tyrannosaurus rex captured by Roland and Ajay tied up away from the camp. Here, miraculously he’s now right where the chaos is, ready for Nick to easily rescue.

The next page is printed in landscape format and once you realise what’s going on it makes for a wonderful idea

In fact, the page before this spread showed Roland and Ajay’s last second escape as a fiery jeep flew through the air and crashed onto the tree they were hiding in awaiting the adult Tyrannosaur, so really this is contradicting the very same issue! I’ve no idea why Don felt the need to do this. In the film we didn’t see Nick grab the baby, he appeared a little while later from a river nearby holding him in his arms.

The next page is printed in landscape format and once you realise what’s going on it makes for a wonderful idea and is brought to the page brilliantly by penciller Jeff Butler, inker Armando Gil, letterer Ken Lopez and editor and colourist Renée Witterstaetter. I know this film like the back of my hand so I know that while Dr Ian Malcolm, Eddie Carr and Ian’s daughter Kelly are in the High Hide at the upper tree level there’s a distant roar, the trees below shake and the stomps of both T-rex adults can be heard moving beneath them. However, despite this dramatic page, none of that is clear.

While it’s unlikely many would be reading this before watching the film (although I do recall my friends and I reading the adaptation for one of the Turtles films before we saw it), most readers will have only seen it once in the cinema by this stage. It would actually have still been playing in theatres when this was out. They’d be reading this to relive the story and as dramatic as that ‘ROAR!’ is on the page I’m not sure readers would’ve noticed it, instead possibly thinking it was just a unique set of panels to reinforce the moment. The characters not acknowledging the roar or any movement below doesn’t help either, making Ian’s decision feel decidedly random.

This of course leads to arguably the most terrifying sequence in the whole movie and one that had us on the edge of our seats in the cinema. Here it’s cut down, as it needs to be for reasons Don laid out last time, but the scale of the scaling back is quite shocking. When the adults arrive Ian simply danders out with the baby into the middle of the clearing instead of the tense moment by the door. He’s completely vulnerable but there’s no tension in his action. He’s even singing!

The next part of this scene is of course the moment when the two-part research vehicle is partly pushed over the cliff by the dinosaurs and while Eddie struggles to stop it from falling by winching it with his car he’s also trying to pull his friends up with a hand rope at the same time, and Dr Sarah Harding is on that slowly cracking pane of glass at the rear of the dangling half, looking right down the cliff towards the crashing waves far below. It’s all wonderfully tense.

Unfortunately one of the very best scenes in the film is reduced to a couple of pages. I did understand where Don was coming from in his article last issue but as I said in that review I don’t think he’s got the balance right; you’d think one of the biggest, most memorable moments would get a lot more space to breathe. Take the most basic key points of these ten minutes in the film (Sarah on glass, Eddie’s death, characters clinging to ropes as the transport falls) and eliminate everything else, that seems to be what the plan was.

There’s some fun art though.

I’m not sure if the narration is taken from the book or the draft script but it feels like it’s trying too hard, as if it’s attempting to make up for all of the missing bits. Not only is most of the action just not here anymore but the characters have absolutely no sense of fear about them, like they’re just going from one inconvenience to the next. Some lip service is played to Sarah’s fear of heights (something the film left out) but it’s not built upon.

I do love the art in the scene though, especially how it perfectly captures the invisible sheet of glass beneath Sarah. However the spider veins mentioned are conspicuously missing, and this won’t be the last time something like this happens which I’ll get to in a bit. Eddie’s whole ordeal trying to survive the T-rex attack is just not here but at least his end isn’t censored like the original movie’s adaptation would do. The final moment of the scene is also captured well here. The art is definitely the main thing driving me forward at this point. That and the great photography and extras.

The poster is a wonderful photo of one of the Velociraptors and I’m positive it would’ve been on my wall if I’d known about this comic at the time, showing off the gorgeous yet terrifying animatronic and the darker tone of this sequel. On the back of this is another dinosaur fact file with its terrible design once more not doing justice to Steve White’s interesting writing.

Back to the final pages of the strip which cover two large parts of the story and unfortunately after the promise of last issue it seems we’re back to rushing through the movie again just to get it over and done with. Dieter Stark is Roland’s second-in-command and his death in the film by the cute little Compsognathus pack may be rushed (with a sequence that’s just confusing for anyone not that familiar with the film) but I’m including it to show the two extremes of this strip; the rushed nature but the potential in the art (especially when you see the panel of his actual death).

I feel the beginning of that sequence can only really be followed if you’ve seen the movie and are familiar with the individual elements of how this transpired. Elsewhere we get some added character moments which again may have originally been in the earlier script, like some tender moments between Ian, Sarah and Kelly before we get to the T-rex pair catching up with our sleeping group. There’s a particular moment here in the movie which truly frightened me with its slow build up and drawn out danger for two of our characters. The suspense was a killer! Here it’s all reduced to one single, solitary panel that completely changes this to a game of peekaboo.

Something else missing is Ian’s moustache! From comments on social media after I posted the first two reviews this apparent inconsistency seems to have particularly irked some people when they read the comic, but for me it’s not really a big deal. It’s still kind of there, it’s now just part of a rough unshaven goatee area like Jeff Goldblum sported in the film. It could be it was decided Jeff wouldn’t sport a moustache after the first two parts of the comic were already drawn. Story wise, I’m happy enough to think that it’s all started to grow out again while he’s been stuck on the island for a few days. Either way, it looks much better now.

After the small additional character scene I mentioned we get a huge change from the film a few pages later when Roland Tempo, played brilliantly by Pete Postlethwaite in the film, is killed by the huge Tyrannosaurus buck! After finding his shotgun has been filled with blanks by Nick he reaches for the tranquillisers. So far, so familiar. But unlike in the film when the T-rex succumbs to it just in the knick of time, here he grabs Roland and throws him towards Carter, the man who gets trampled to death in the film.

This is one change I really don’t like. Roland was one of the best characters in the film and since he’s now dead we no longer get to see his solemn redemption later after Ajay’s death, when he tells Ludlow he’s seen quite enough death instead of accepting a job at InGen. The hunter became rather Ian-like in the end and accepting of his part in the inevitable chaos. This will all now be missing. If this was in the script Don was working from then I’m very, very glad screenwriter David Koepp and Steven Spielberg changed this character’s arc.

The penultimate chapter of the adaptation ends with our main characters trapped behind the waterfall (in a scene from the first Jurassic Park novel and depicted by Walter Simonson and Richard Cry on the cover) as Roland’s palaeontologist Dr. Robert Burke is grabbed by one of the T-rexes and dragged out. Just like the spider veins mentioned when Sarah was in danger, the curtain of blood described here is nowhere to be seen, somewhat dampening the moment.

Chapter three has certainly been a mixed bag then. I liked some of the extra character scenes but hated the death of another, although to be fair to Don that wasn’t his fault. Some of the very best moments of the film, (some of my favourite moments in cinema, period) were so rushed here they were barely recognisable, and the fun art has been on top form at times with some great images but plagued by inconsistencies elsewhere. I come away frustrated more than anything because of what this talented team could’ve created.

There’s no character mini-poster this time, instead we get five pages of a welcome pack for new employees to InGen and it contains a lot of photographs of model dinosaurs used in the pre-production of the first two films. I thought there was something strange about the little pictures of the animals in circles throughout #1 but now I know what they are they’re a delight to look at up close like this. All the main dinosaurs are covered, including this film’s Parasaurolophus Walkeri and the sick Triceratops from Jurassic Park.

There are also some funny moments such as the exceptions to staff’s apparently comprehensive insurance policies, which absolve InGen of any responsibility whatsoever if Chaos Theory rears its head. As with the previous two issues I’ve found the extras more enjoyable than the strip, so kudos to editor John Freeman and his team, these pages add a lot to the overall package.

We’ve only one chapter of the story to go and I feel just like I did when the first film’s adaptation finished its penultimate chapter; there’s just no way they could possibly cover everything still to happen in 22 pages. It’ll be interesting if nothing else! We’ll find out what survives in #4 of The Lost World Jurassic Park on Monday 7th August 2023.

iSSUE TWO < > iSSUE FOUR

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