Links to all of this year’s posts are in piggy pink below
As I sit in my living room, buoyed by my tree lights twinkling, my electronic fire-effect fireplace animating and my Apple HomePod providing the sound effects, and warmed by a combination of my gas heating finally being on all day and a Starbucks Eggnog Latte in my belly, I welcome you all to Christmas 2024 on the OiNK Blog. What a feast I’ve got in store this year.
I really try to better each year’s festive season and if I do say so myself I think I’ll achieve it with what’s coming your way. There may be no more OiNK Books to cover but that doesn’t mean Uncle Pigg’s comic won’t be the star. Kicking off on Saturday 30th November 2024 is the first of a four-part weekly series called The OiNK Interview Series, starring no less than 11 of the comic’s top contributors!
Every Saturday during the build up to Christmas Day they’ll provide answers to one specific OiNK-related question, the same question to everyone. It’ll be a fascinating look behind-the-scenes of OiNK and its creative team. This is one series of posts I’m particularly looking forward to, but that’s not all for the pig pals among you.
In fact, pig pals themselves are the stars of this year’s Christmas Day post. Ever wish you’d purchased some of that groovy OiNK merchandise? Some pig pals still have their Prime Porky Products all these decades later and are more than willing to make the rest of us jealous by showing them off. So that’s exactly what a handful of fans will be doing on The Big Day.
Also this Christmas season is the third part in our occasional series of lovely retro adverts from the pages of OiNK, suitably enough all of the Toys and Games that had us drooling. You can check them out on Friday 27th December. Also, watch out for an interview with OiNK co-editor Mark Rodgers in the pages of a Christmassy Speakeasy from 1987, in which he discusses OiNK’s creation, controversies and their plans for the weekly. That’ll be here on Thursday 12th December.
I’ve already featured both of OiNK’s annuals but our coverage of its characters in seasonal books doesn’t stop there. The first Buster Book to feature Tom Thug (as well as Pete and his Pimple and Weedy Willy) gets the full OiNK Blog treatment on Thursday 19th December. Before that, the 1989 volume of its sister title, Big Comic Book starts off our Christmas celebrations on Wednesday 27th November in the third year of its blog read through.
My very favourite star of Big Comic (he’s a highlight of every review in that series), Gums has his own book out, Classic Gums. I received it last Christmas and it’d make for the perfect hint to throw to your loved ones! You’ll be able to check out highlights from the toothless wonder in his own review on Wednesday 4th December. We’re not done with the annuals though.
Michael and K.I.T.T. have been yearly stars of the blog and 2024 is no exception. My favourite TV series of my childhood… actually, of my life… may have lasted for four years but it had five annuals altogether. The middle book in the Knight Rider Annual series has more strips, prose stories, interviews and those oh-so-80s pin ups for you to check out on Tuesday 17th December.
The Transformers made their debut on the blog this year with the Generation 2 real time read through and full access to the epic seven-year-plus Instagram read through of the original UK comic. Beginning on Sunday 15th December is the first of a new yearly series of in-depth reviews of the Transformers Christmas issues from that original run. You’ll also see the previous issue’s Next Issue promo on Sunday 1st December. The first year of that comic was very different to what you remember, believe me! So make sure you check that out.
The Christmas issue of Transformers contains reader drawings as part of the festivities, and in a special post this Christmas I’ll be showing the earliest examples of Young Me In Stuff, namely some of my childhood comics and magazines. The first time it happened was met with much exhilaration at the surprise of it all, so the post will go up on the anniversary of my drawing seeing print, on Tuesday 10th December.
Let’s also not forget our three current real time read throughs! This Christmas you can expect the special, final issue of the simply hilarious The Sleeze Brothers (#6) on Monday 23rd December, a festive Christmassy cover adorns the Aliens comic of all things (#7) on Christmas Eve (the perfect day for a little horror story or three) and the Dinobots are the cover stars of Transformers Generation 2 #4 on Sunday 29th December.
Phew! Throw in two personal posts on Christmas Eve and New Year’s Eve on the blog (links below), and a review of this year’s Christmas Beano on John Freeman‘s Down the Tubes website, and I hope you can appreciate why I’m feeling exhausted just telling you about everything that’s to come! I love writing this site and I particularly adore doing so when it comes to all the Christmas content. It’s going to be the best yet, so Merry Christmas everyone! Now, let’s have some fun!
(If you’d like your own Tom Thug Christmas angel for your tree, you can print out the page from OiNK in this post.)
I was very happy to find the main strip in this third issue of Marvel US’s Transformers Generation 2 ended after only 16 pages. Not because I was glad that particular story was over or anything, rather because it meant there was another back up strip to enjoy. After hoping we’d see the same format as last time return, the issue is off to a great start for this fan of Marvel UK’s winning formula, which the US comic is now embracing.
The main story, as ever written by Simon Furman, is called Primal Fear and I needn’t have worried about its title being similar to ones from the previous generation. Although the ‘ancient evil’ storyline is still to be built upon, for now this involves a sector of the galaxy that preys on hidden fears and aggression buried deep within the subconscious of any visitors.
It kicks off with this first page that’s notable for its heavy use of wiring and hoses within the framework of the robots. It reminds me of the live-action Transformers and something certain dark corners of the internet complained were unnecessary and ugly, proving some fans really don’t know their history (much like story elements of the films they complained about which were actually inspired by the original comics or cartoon).
Manny Galan (Sonic the Hedgehog, The New Warriors, Street Sharks) has taken over as penciller on the main story with inks by Jim Amash (Archie & Friends, Deadpool, Night Thrasher) and Marie Severin (Kull the Conqueror, The Haunt of Fear, Alf). I’m not sure how I feel about it if I’m honest. At times it feels like some of the earlier UK art and I’m all for that, it has a real classic vibe to it. However, at other times it comes across like they’re struggling with how the Transformers move; they can come across stilted, as if drawn from how the action figures moved.
Hound in particular looks like he could decapitate himself with a good sneeze
But it’s those necks full of robotics that I can’t help but notice. I may have been a big fan of the realism brought to giant alien robots in the live-action films, but here the necks in particular can look ridiculously elongated. Below are two such examples. This doesn’t happen on every page, but when it does it’s like the artist is trying too hard. Upon occasion it’s just too extreme for me. Thank goodness for Richard Starkings’ and John Gaushell’s letters and Sarra Mossoff’s colours returning.
Hound in particular looks like he could decapitate himself with a good sneeze, or perhaps he’s starring in an 80s futuristic movie with a person dressed up in a robot suit, the excess of wires hiding the shape of the actor’s neck. I do, however, like the reflection of Jhiaxus on Prime’s mouth guard. So, what’s this about an ancient evil feeding off others’ primal instincts?
The Transformers were created by Primus to fight and destroy Unicron, which they successfully did in the final year of the original comic. But that in-built aggression is a natural element of their being and something Jhiaxus argues is their true nature, believing Prime and the Autobots’ wish for peace is sacrilegious and ultimately doomed to failure. It’s these deeply buried instincts that Prime has been more willing than normal to embrace over these first few issues.
Indeed, Prime goes very dark in some parts of this early fight and initially I didn’t like these scenes at all. I thought they were just following on from the previous issues and were another example of how his character was more hard-edged. A lot of this is very out of character indeed, but once Simon gets the chance to explain all about this sector of the galaxy (and what’s really happening to Prime) I breathed a sigh of relief, and it’s a great little story.
Optimus eventually gets through to Jhiaxus as only he can, by talking him down and trying to make him see reason. Every ounce of Prime wants to fight back as Jhiaxus continues trying to violently finish things. But we soon realise Jhiaxus is fighting back so desperately because in the heat of battle he gets an element of peace from his own devastating past. He doesn’t want to remember who he was… but he does, below.
Confusingly, the page above is read in columns, although by looking closely you can see the first panel crumbling away into the image of the screaming Decepticon leader. He was a sadistic killer, murdering for the sport, and his greatest fear is that his so-called ‘higher calling’ of galactic conquest in the name of his race is nothing more than his past self dressed up in a more respectable cloak.
As Prime states, they were all created to fight and kill. It’s a heavy moment that hadn’t really occurred to me until now. No wonder Prime’s been struggling to hold back those darker feelings, when the events of the previous two issues seemed to outdo everything they’d achieved over millions of years. Something is forcing them to regress into what they were eons ago; earlier selves they’d overcome to become something greater, even if they’re on opposing sides of the conflict. This is the Prime I remember!
Much like a twisted version of Peter Pan’s shadow, the creatures have attached themselves, but they weaken as the Transformers walk away. And walk away they must. They can’t fight these things, or each other. To do so would release more rage and simply bait these creatures further. It takes a much stronger character to walk away from a battle and the two leaders order their warriors to back away and leave, agreeing to a temporary truce until they next meet.
However, on the last page of the story Jhiaxus can’t help himself and decides to wipe out all life on the planet to prepare it for colonisation. If this will come back to bite him in the time we have with this comic I don’t know, we’ll have to wait and see. Jhiaxus’ anger at letting the Autobots live grows as he gives his orders. Is this anger being fed by the aliens? He’s made for an excellent baddie so far and we’ve only scraped the surface of his character. A truly excellent creation of Simon’s.
Old Evils is the back up strip and, speaking of great baddies, one of my absolute favourites is back. Firstly though, it carries on from the main strip as Jhiaxus returns to his ship, thankful there’s no sign of any Decepticons from the millennia-old war still alive to tarnish what he’s trying to do in the Decepticon name. Then, elsewhere in the galaxy we see an alien vessel attacked by a much larger ship commanded by none other than Bludgeon!
I’m sure this small strip is very much a prelude of what’s to come, much like the best black and white stories in the original UK comic’s later life; stories which added more depth and foreboding to the US strips, when we’d see elements of storylines long before American readers. The main point here is to bring Bludgeon and the Decepticons we all know so well back into the picture and send them off to our home planet!
I was wondering if Earth was going to get a look in since all of the stories so far have been set in deep space and it’s only a 12-issue run. Not that it was meant to be a 12-issue run of course… or was it? The first Transmissions page contains a surprise in the very first letter, in which reader Benson G. Yes says he’s aware of the current storyline ending with #12! Of course, he could just mean this particular story involving Jhiaxus rather than the comic itself, but it was still a surprise to read this as I’d assumed something had already slipped out that the comic was scheduled to end.
I was thrilled to read the confirmation that the two-strip format is going to remain, and even more thrilled that the stunning art of Derek Yaniger will continue to thrill me, even if it is only within the back ups. After this, the Marvel Bullpen Bulletin makes a brief mention of long-time Transformers writer Bob Budiansky who had moved over to run the company’s trading cards division, and that’s it for another issue.
I’m glad the main strip was more self-contained than the previous two. While it continued the overall story (particularly for Optimus Prime’s and Jhiaxus’ character arcs), the fact it also had a proper beginning, middle and end was like proper old-school Transformers. Three issues in and it feels like it’s just the beginning of true greatness. Transformers Generation 2 continues with #4 during the what-day-of-the-week-is-it-anyway period of the festive season, on Sunday 29th December 2024. Catch you then.
After the rendered brilliance of last issue’s Chris Halls cover I assumed this still-brilliantly crafted front page image was one of the better American covers, but upon reading the editorial we find out it’s actually by another British artist, Pete Doherty (Judge Dredd, Millarworld, Shaolin Cowboy). The cover of Aliens #6 from Dark Horse International shows one alien being attacked by many others in Hive, which we’ll return to later in the review.
First up is part five of Mike Richardson’s movie adaptation… sorry, I mean ‘Newt’s Tale‘. Again, for this allegedly retelling the movie through the eyes of the young survivor of LV-426 she doesn’t appear at all over the first seven pages, which include another moment from the Special Edition a lot of readers may not have seen at the time. Unfortunately, the tense scene involving the ever decreasing ammo counters of the remote sentries is cut down to this one page.
The ammo counters are quickly referenced later but it doesn’t exactly convey the same amount of excitement as the restored scene in the film. We never saw the actual “shooting gallery” on screen either and it was much more tense that way. Elsewhere there’s a passing comment from Bishop that the aliens also captured the livestock to impregnate, foreshadowing Alien³ somewhat and there’s also one of the best delivered lines in the whole movie.
When Bishop tells them that one of the cooling tanks in the nuclear reactor has been damaged and it’s gone into a state of emergency venting, just when everything else already seemed so bleak and hopeless, Hicks’ line of “How long ’til it blows?” was delivered in such an understated, deflated way by actor Michael Biehn it made us laugh! It had the perfect tone of, “Of course it is.” A comic obviously can’t convey the delivery, but reading the line still made me chuckle.
The big moment here is one that finally involves Newt and it’s the scene in which she and Ripley secure themselves inside the medical facility to rest, unaware (as were the audience) that Burke had slipped in and let a facehugger loose. As this begins, penciller Jim Somerville and inker Brian Garvey produce this eerie, unnerving panel of the two characters asleep while Newt’s decapitated doll’s head seemingly looks on in terror, its mouth covered by Ellen.
As all hell breaks loose in what was a truly terrifying scene in the film, Gregory Wright’s colours come into their own as he gives certain panels a red tone, mimicking the alarm that was going off at the time without the need of large SFX lettering taking up necessary space. However, this double-page spread perfectly conveys a movie adaptation; as a comic in its own right it’s pretty damned good, but for anyone who’d already seen the film it feels rushed and a bit by-the-numbers.
This is simply because a comic adaptation can never produce the same feelings and reactions as a movie, it can never work to the same beats. The best adaptations are those that change the movie to suit the format, and unfortunately this one tries to stay too close to the source material, so overall it’s a bit lacking. This isn’t the fault of the team behind it, they were in a losing situation before it began, and the art is great.
Time for some contemporary Aliens news, pages I always look forward to every month. Well okay, only one out of the four pieces of news directly involves Aliens this month but it’s none-the-less an interesting look back in time to November 1992. Of note is writer Dave Hughes’ description of Thelma and Louise as a “role-reversal” road movie. Really? I also didn’t know it had a director’s cut. Then in the charts Warner Bros were having a great time of it but I pity the poor sods investing in the first three episodes of the weekly V series. I can sympathise. I was one of them. Not a patch on the two previous mini-series.
In the competition the question could only have been answered by those who had seen the film, even though surely those who hadn’t would want to enter, but at least it’s honest about knowing its readers would be lying about their age. Finally, that Spider-Man film sounds like the worst idea ever and at the same time like the most 90s comic movie ever.
On to my favourite strip, Mark Verheiden’s Cold War, our Predator back up and I’ve finally watched the first two movies! Having done so brings a new level of enjoyment to this, my memories of them and my imagination adding to the already gruesome art by penciller Ron Randall, inker Steve Mitchell, colourists Chris Chalenor and Rachelle Menashe, and letterer Clem Robins. The Predators are no longer stationery images on a page anymore, suddenly the still images here are accurately conveying some dynamic movements and thrills.
This is our sequel of sorts to both films and the Americans blow their way out of their entrapment from last month. A stand off occurs between them and the Soviets until Ligachev grabs Schaefer and makes a run for it, knowing both sides don’t stand a chance against the aliens, and even if they could neither side should get hold of those weapons. In the end they’re soon recaptured when the Americans’ expensive winter clothing and weaponry give out in the extreme cold.
Schaefer is in his own clothes (he’s police, not military) and soon the two leads find a ravine they agree they’d have chosen if they were the aliens, with Yashin and his men in hot pursuit and shooting to kill. At one point Schaefer puts his life on the line to shout a warning to them about the aliens but they don’t listen and one-by-one they’re taken apart – quite literally – by one lone Predator standing guard at the entrance to the ravine.
At the time Predator: Cold War may have been seen as a bit of a role reversal between the two super powers
After the build up over the past few months this issue’s chapter is great! I’m not complaining about the story building slowly, I’ve really enjoyed it in fact, and this chapter works so well thanks to everything that came before. It’s a superb pay off for the human tension, not to mention the mystery behind these creatures for this rookie reader. Schaefer’s lone wolf attitude and clichéd 80s action heroism plays off perfectly against Ligachev’s humanity, which I’m guessing at the time may have been seen as a bit of a role reversal between the two super powers.
In the end, Schaefer’s heroics almost see him die at the hands of the Predator and it’s only Ligachev emptying dozens of bullets into it at close range that saves him. Even if I hadn’t seen those movies recently this strip does a superb job of conveying the terrors they’re up against. The odds couldn’t be more stacked against them in the icy wilderness and I can’t wait for the next chapter!
The widescreen release of Alien is up for review this issue and it’s by Jim Campbell again, who is thankfully a lot more positive than he was about the Aliens Special Edition. I remember this exciting time when favourite films of mine would get director’s cuts and widescreen releases, the latter of which really appealed to me. While we didn’t have a widescreen TV for several more years, I could easily ignore the black bars and enjoy a whole new cinematic experience for the likes of Jaws and the James Bond series.
Jaws was like a whole new film than the one on the 4:3 VHS I’d almost worn out, and despite the 60s Bond movies not being all that wide I still restarted my collection. I completely agree with Jim that this was a much better way to watch movies (even on regular 4:3 screens) and on the many benefits it brought; everything from just enjoying the full picture to actually benefitting the story, characters and, for the likes of Alien and Jaws the way the director created the suspense and jump scares.
Jim says the widescreen version of Alien better represents director Ridley Scott’s vision for his film and I completely agree. But surely that’s what the Aliens Special Edition also did for James Cameron, a version that Jim said was unnecessary and gave a negative review for in #2. Of course today these points are moot since we’ve moved on from this particular transition point in home media.
Poor Max! Part six of Hive continues the worst-plan-in-a-science-fiction-story ever and on the front cover we’ve already been told there’s a traitor in amongst the aliens, so we know synthetic Norbert has somehow survived. How he did is shown to us but not explained, as you’ll see.
We kick things off with Max dead and there’s a hole in his chest, ringing bells for anyone who had seen Alien³ in the cinema by this point (although I prefer the Collector’s Edition story in this regard). In keeping with the forced tension I talked about last time, Dr. Myakovsky can’t reach Max and he’ll obviously fall deep into the hive depths if he stretches too far, but he still tries to. Because of course he would.
Sigh. I saw that coming. And then of course Julian Lish and Gill open fire when they’re not meant to bring attention to themselves. Because, you know, tension and all that. Then comes possibly the strangest part of Jerry Prosser’s story since we saw Norbert and Max playing together in #1, back when the story had so much interesting potential.
Seemingly destroyed last time,Norbert appears to be able to pull from the alien hive around him to repair himself, and even grow a gun? No explanation is given as to how this is possible, and even though the art by Kelley Jones and colouring by Les Dorscheid are great, it really could’ve done with some letters by Clem to explain what the hell this is all about. It just looks weird. It’s also a bit too handy plot-wise and they escape the hive.
Rounding off the issue is the comics checklist and The Terminator has disappeared so DHI must’ve only been finishing off the previous publisher’s run. Then on the letters page there’s a mix of positive and negative correspondence regarding Alien³. The positive ones take the time to explain their opinions, while the negative ones are just angry rants with no reasoning, claiming it’s the end of the Alien series, that it was an insult to “true fans” (that old chestnut) and one even states that since fans are spending their money on these films they should demand what stories are told. It’s like social media before social media was a thing.
Given the results of the readers’ survey (image below), the letters really do evoke a certain hell site on the internet.
With that terrifying image we come to the end and I’m really looking forward to the next issue. I’m genuinely excited by what the next chapter of Cold War could contain and we may even be getting near the end of Hive. But most of all there’s the promise of finally taking a closer look at the first of Chris Halls’ Christmas covers! Christmas in an Aliens comic! When can we expect our next bit of horror? Why, on Christmas Eve 2024, naturally. Isn’t that the best time for a little horror story?
It’s taken me a while to write this. I wanted to take the time to tell you a little about my dad, I just didn’t think I’d be writing this so soon. In August, just five short months after my mum passed and I wrote about her, my dad passed away. He was never the same after mum died and on the way to the hospital he kept kissing his wedding ring, ready to go and join her. It’s been a tough year.
If anyone ever asks me about my dad the first thing I mention is always his sense of humour. He was always lovably daft. I remember as a child when he was making himself a cup of tea and I’d shout into the kitchen from the living room, “Can I have a cup?” he’d say yes, and then proceed to come out with his tea and an empty cup for me. “Well, you didn’t say you wanted anything in it.” Then off I’d go to make my own cuppa!
Me and dad on the Isle of Man in 1984
Or how about the life lessons our dads teach us when we’re in our formative years? Like when mum would’ve asked him to do some dusting around the house while she was out, and he’d pull me aside to show me which ornaments to swap about into the wrong places to make it look like he’d done it. Dad’s sense of humour was wonderful and I remember growing up and discovering stand up comedy through him too with the likes of Billy Connelly and Dave Allen, and watching Married with Children together.
It’s strange the random memories that come back when we lose someone we love, and how previously forgotten childhood memories can resurface, clear as crystal in our minds. I remember being very, very young and we lived at the bottom of a hill. My dad owned a motorbike back then and when he came home from work he’d always stop at the top of the hill and wait for me to come running out of the house and all the way up to him so I could ride down on his back. I can see that in my mind as if it were yesterday, something I hadn’t thought of in decades.
Me and dad, Douglas in 1983
As I approach the first Christmas without them I can hear their voices telling me to celebrate and enjoy my favourite time of the year. I’ll make sure I do, in their honour. In fact, this festive season I’ll be partaking in a certain hobby for the first time since childhood, one which my dad and I enjoyed together at times. When I was a kid he sourced a huge wooden board for my Hornby trains and painted it with grass, rivers and roads. I look forward to opening my first model train set in about 30 years this Christmas and thinking about how much dad would’ve been right there with me enjoying it.
My mum and dad split just after I left high school and I didn’t see him for many years. I was in my 30s when he moved back to our hometown and I went to visit him, happy with the news they were talking and had become friends again. They seemed so genuinely happy. I shouldn’t have been surprised then when my dad phoned me one day asking if I had any use of some old TV equipment at mum’s apartment. I asked why and he said he needed to make room for his stuff. I’d no idea they’d even got back together! That was a very happy day.
Mum and dad at my cousin Neil’s wedding in 2012
Dad hadn’t been well for some time at the home where he’d spent the last few years. However, the last time I saw him he was in good form and had seemed to perk up towards the end. In hindsight it was like he knew he was going to see mum again soon. I’ve never understood that whole ‘They’re no longer in pain’ thing people say. I do now, and I’m happy he’s at peace and the two of them are together again.
Me with my mum and dad at my cousin Elaine’s wedding in 2015
My mum and dad both watch over me now from atop my bookshelf in this photo, the same one I showed you earlier in the year. It was the last one I ever took of the three of us together because I so rarely take photos of myself. I know I’ll see them again. Although the wait will be agonising I’ll never stop thinking about them and how they raised me. I hope I can make both of them proud.
To end with, here’s a photo my dad took on a family holiday to the Isle of Man back in 1985. He found the licence plate so hilarious he just had to take a picture of it, which he gave to me when we got them developed. I found it while looking for photos of him and it made me laugh so hard remembering him in that moment!
There was no issue of Marvel UK’s (Epic imprint) monthly comic during October 1989. The fifth issue of The Sleeze Brothers was released at the end of September (just three weeks after the previous issue) despite its cover date being ‘December’. The sixth and final issue wouldn’t arrive until just two days before Christmas either. Why the big gap? I have no idea. I just know these were the release dates thanks to information in sister titles Transformers and The Real Ghostbusters.
But after really (really, really) enjoying the issues so far that’s just too long a wait with nothing new from El’ Ape and Deadbeat for the blog. Thankfully, there was a neat little extra in the first issue that I decided to hold back to help plug this gap. It’s a page at the rear of the issue where the Sleezes looked upon the team responsible for bringing them to life in the first place. Suitably enough, it’s a criminal line up! But it’s even better than that.
Drawn by the regular team of penciller Andy Lanning and inker Stephen Baskerville, it paints quite the picture of Marvel UK’s finest, doesn’t it? I’ve praised this team endlessly these past few months and for good reason. Looking at this it’s clear to me the weird and wacky world of The Sleeze Brothers needed an equally weird and wacky team behind it all. It gives the impression this was a fun comic to work on and from speaking to originating editor Richard Starkings, that was certainly the case.
I adore all the little in-jokes in the descriptions of each person, although my favourite part is the fact Steve White is drawn as a dinosaur. He produced some gorgeous colouring for another favourite comic of mine, Dark Horse International’s UK Jurassic Park comic, and today his incredibly elaborate and, frankly, bloody stunning dinosaur illustrations fill his Instagram, website and self-published books.
The final issue of The Sleeze Brothers will be reviewed here on Monday 23rd December 2024 but that won’t be the end of their coverage on the OiNK Blog. You’ll have to wait for that final regular review to find out what else is to come in the future, but until then I hope you enjoyed this little insight into the offices of Marvel UK as much as I did. We’ll return to the apparently “not-too-distant future” Earth this Christmas.
Originally published back in 2016, I first covered Jeremy Banx’s hilarious book on the first incarnation of the OiNK Blog. Now, eight years later and as part of the monthly OiNK Contributor Releasesseries, I just had to include it again because it’s so damned good! It still feels fresh, exciting and original, and of course there’s plenty to giggle about.
Frankenthing is a prose book lavished with the kind of illustrations fans of Jeremy’s Burp will lap up and narrated in a style only he can do. It all kicks off when the monster created by Doctor Frankenstein (or, Doctor Henry Victor Lionel Basil Kenneth Edison Clive Edsel Frankenstein to give him his full name) is down in the dumps because he’s lonely, so his creator makes him a little friend thanks to a ‘toy’ brought into the castle by Igor, the one-eared cat. Not that anyone actually knows what he was when he was alive.
Any pig pal should be leaping for their wallets after reading these samples. Jeremy’s style is such that it’s completely suitable for younger readers too. In fact, in parts it reads like a classic children’s book, the likes of which we may have grown up on ourselves. I can just imagine OiNK fans and their children having the greatest time together with this as their bedtime story over the course of a few nights.
There are funny little footnotes which elaborate on passing comments within the text, the book is full of brilliantly original sound effects for kids to repeat out loud and as you can see, even though Frankenthing is such a diminutive little character his creation is still shown in epic Universal monster movie style. Jeremy’s descriptions paint a picture too, with phrases such as, “his bottom quivered like a fried egg in an earthquake” and “his knees shook like a road-driller’s watch chain”.
The friendship between the two characters is genuinely sweet if completely unorthodox and the main bulk of the story has them playing a game of hide-and-seek (with the monster’s seeking hindered somewhat: “Because he had no idea how to count to a hundred he had to count to one a hundred times”), during which Igor the hungry cat eyes up the new addition. The resulting chase and back and forth involving all three characters feels like a hectic Wallace & Gromit scene in written word form, and who better to do that than Jeremy Banx.
Jeremy seems to have a particular penchant for anything to do with eyes, as they pop up in comedically grotesque ways throughout the story. The highlight of laughable grossness is a bucketful of loose eyeballs Frankenthing falls into and the job he has in trying to get back out again! It’s an addictive read and you’ll speed through the thirteen chapters and enjoy every single second of it. Told in a quick-fire style, you’re only ever a few sentences away from something funny (or surreal and funny).
The idiocy of the two main characters spills over into the narration as well. While they’re about to talk (or, in the case of the monster, grunt) the narration gives us insights into the inner workings of what should be their brains, in funny moments like the first sample below. Then in the second photo is an example of a call back to one of the paragraphs above, something else Jeremy does so well in this book that brings some genuine laugh-out-loud moments.
Also included are some appendices which are referred to at random points within the main story. For example, the first one takes a good long look at the historical contexts of the Frankenstein family emblem, every elaboration getting more ludicrous than the one before. There are also instructions on how to make origami trolls (the monster’s favourite pastime), a map, medical certificates and more.
Frankenthing is unmissable for any fan of Jeremy’s. I loved every single page and I can see parents and their children having a blast with it! It’s available through Amazon at £5.95 for the gorgeous paperback edition or £1.99 for the Kindle version. (Oh, and for some reason there’s a French version on Apple Books for £5.49 too.) So treat yourself or your kids… or throw a hint for the little holiday coming up next month.
On a chilly November morning in 1989 I innocently toddled off to my local newsagent’s to pick up my Transformers, The Real Ghostbusters and Big Comic Fortnightly, only to be met with a lovely, glossy OiNK-shaped comic handed to me from the reservations box too! I’d no idea this was coming. I’d thought the Holiday Special from earlier in the year was the final issue ever. Seeing no annual on the shelves by now I’d given up hope of ever seeing a new OiNK again.
So you can imagine my excitement when this surprise 68-page OiNK Winter Special slid out from behind the others. You can probably also imagine the speed at which nearly-12-years-old me ran back to my house to ask my mum and dad for more money, and their shock when I told them exactly how much it was. Needless to say my other comics were ignored that day. Oh, and the cover image was drawn by co-editor Patrick Gallagher and that’s his brother and OiNK photographer James as David Smellamy.
Inside, it begins with an OiNK Book-like introduction page. Unfortunately these little glimpses of Psycho Gran, The Spectacles of Doom and Greedy Gorb are all we got of them as they don’t actually appear anywhere else, and Horace (Ugly Face) Watkins only pops up in a reprint, but at the time I was just so excited to get a new OiNK I don’t think I realised how much of it was reprint material. I’ll get to that later but first up I have to talk about the paper quality here.
This is very much in keeping with the tradition of the previously published Buster and Wildcat Winter Specials from 1987 and 1988 respectively, including their price. Inside the thin but gorgeous card cover are 64 shiny, high-quality pages far above that used at any stage in the regular comic. It may have the same amount of pages as the second annual but the paper stock makes it feel a lot thinner. It’s gorgeous to look at and hold though. Can’t fault it at all!
We kick things off with a fun three-page Pete and his Pimple and it’s great to see him back after missing him in the Holiday Special earlier this year, when he and Tom Thug (who also returns in this issue) kept themselves to Buster comic instead. With this being the final Pete strip in an OiNK, Lew Stringer decided to pick no less than ten reader ideas for ridding Mr. Throb of his pimple and, while they’re all fun, the best part for me is Lew’s interpretations of what the readers could’ve looked like!
I would particularly like to know what Kevin Leeden of Goole’s reaction was upon reading this, and poor little Janice Hogan of Cumbria! (At least her dungarees provided a little context.) Lew began asking readers for their suggestions way back in the first weekly issue, #45. Inspired by Ken Reid’s Dare-A-Day Davy strip from Pow! in 1967 (readers sent in dares for the character), Lew ended up receiving many more than he could ever possibly have used, hence the list at the end.
There are some fun little additions too (although that alien on the first page wasn’t Lew’s), like an apology to fellow OiNK cartoonist Davy Francis and marking the occasion of David Leach’s wedding. At the end you’ll see Pete was due to reappear in the Buster Book 1990 which readers of that comic would soon receive for Christmas. I didn’t move over to Buster (the comic or books) as I explained when I reviewed the early merged issues, but that’s something I’m going to correct this year.
Starting this Christmas I’ll be reading each of the remaining Buster Books, one per year, so watch out for Lew’s Pete and Tom strips this festive season. They’ll both be brand new OiNK character strips for me, for the first time in decades for these two in fact, so I’m very excited to say the least. Although due to changes made for Buster, the pages above would be the last time readers saw all that ‘orrible pus exploding everywhere.
I remember laughing so hard at The Pig With No Name as a kid that I developed a little pain in my side
There are a few even larger strips here too, such as an eight-page story for The Slugs, although it’s written by Charlie Brooker and Mark Rodgers instead of Tony Husband, the first time that’s happened, but it’s still brilliantly brought to the page by Lezz. It involves the band being told they need a female lead singer by their agent and it’s funny what their main complaint about this is! But Anna Key is even louder and more obnoxious than they are and it brings their adventures to a happy ending.
David Haldane‘s Rubbish Man also returns in the nine-page Plague of the Zombie Tortoises and it’s much better than his last strip in the monthlies; his idiocy has returned, as has (I’m very happy to say) his disgusting superpowers. So Jimmy got the send off he deserved in the end. Then on Tom Thug’s page is another classic Lew Stringer rhyming script with a plug for where we could find Tom for the next several years.
The third and final multi-part strip was most likely created for the weeklies, seeing as how it’s made up of two-page spreads with edited cliffhanger captions and even looks like it may have originally been in colour (there are black and white reprints of colour strips elsewhere with the same finish to them). Drawn by Chas Sinclair, The Pig With No Name takes on all of the clichés of cowboy and western movies. It’s one I remember laughing so hard at as a kid that I developed a little pain in my side. That moment comes on the second page below and I’m sure you can work out what bit I’m talking about.
After I picked myself back up from that bathroom door scene the rest of the story is a cracker (crackling?). In part two the usual man-enters-a-saloon-and-everyone-stops scene is spoofed, quickly followed by the evil butcher villain and his men having a complete panic and showing the reader what really must go on behind the door in such scenes in these movies. Then finally, it all builds up to the stereotypical quick draw and ends with a hilarious, surprising defeat!
So who wrote this incredibly funny strip? Patrick confirms that it was his fellow co-editor Tony Husband, who worked so brilliantly with Chas on many strips, but strangely it includes no credits all. In fact, Tony’s signature is nowhere to be found in any of the new material. There are reprints of Horace Watkins, one of Tony’s Golden Trough Awards from an early issue and some of his quick gag pages from the weeklies, but for all intents and purposes he’s absent. I asked Patrick about this and he tells me the reason is most likely because they were simply so busy on the Round the Bend TV show by this time.
It’s all very funny, but a few bits and pieces feel like they would’ve been better suited to a comic like Gas
Altogether there are 12 pages of reprints. As a kid I remember recognising some but I’d no idea until right now there were so many. They are some of the very best examples of OiNK’s humour though, so for those unfamiliar with them they add a great deal to the package.
The photo of Patrick is reprinted from an earlier Grunts page but everything else here in GBH’s newest scam is brand new. The small print under the “All Goods At 1/2 Prince Unless Otherwise Stated” headline, the not-at-all-subtle dig at 80s marketing for new fangled music equipment and of course the boasts about the very ordinary features their TV includes are all classic GBH! I’m going to miss these gangsters.
A couple of pages later comes a double-page which shows how much OiNK had changed since its early days. Drawn by Mike Peek with admittedly very funny lyrics written by co-editor Mark Rodgers, this went way over my head at the time. The same thing happened a few times in the monthlies after publisher Fleetway’s well-intentioned (but misguided) tampering to push OiNK towards a slightly older teen audience.
This and some censored, but still very obvious, bad language (in particular in The Slugs) shows OiNK wasn’t a young children’s comic anymore and I think that’s very sad. Its humour was always cheeky, rude even, but it had an innocence about it. While some contents, like most of what I’ve shown you here, could still fall under that category, this spread and a few others contribute to an overall feeling of OiNK no longer being the same publication I remember so fondly.
The team that were still working on it were definitely producing the goods, however OiNK was at its best when it was a children’s comic that could be read and enjoyed by anyone of any age, rather than a comic with a teen-and-older target audience that could (upon occasion) alienate its younger readers. Don’t get me wrong, as an adult it’s all very funny, but a few bits and pieces feel like they would’ve been better suited to a comic like Gas, which a lot of the OiNK team did contribute to (look out for that at a future date).
For the final time, let’s sign off the issue with some new Ian Jackson art.
If you look closely at the first and last speech balloons, the words “effort” and “Holiday Special” seem added in after the fact, like there was originally mention of a “Book” or “OiNK Book” respectively. I asked Patrick who confirms some of the material here was indeed intended for The OiNK! Book 1990 before OiNK was cancelled and he thinks I’m right about the edited words above too.
This particular edition of OiNK is a bit tricky to track down these days, only rarely popping up on eBay but it’s definitely worth keeping an eye out for. It truly is a gorgeous issue and, while there’s a reprint collection to come, this feels like a fitting swan song for a comic that was so fundamental to my life. It feels like a very special issue when held in your trotters and gives some fan favourites a suitable ending after the sudden cancellation last year. Coveted by a lot of fans, the OiNK Winter Special is a treasured piece of my collection and contains a lot of happy memories.
Well this second issue of Marvel US’s Transformers Generation 2 feels a heck of a lot lighter after the extra long strip (and 16 page advert in the middle) of last month’s premiere issue. The contents is also more like the UK comic than the previous G1 American title, with a 16-page main strip and a seven-page back up strip which was originally printed in a special mini-comic given away with toys for Halloween that year (1993).
The cover immediately tells us this issue will pick up from where the G.I. Joe crossover finished in #142 of their comic so I was excited going into this one, but absolutely thrilled to see the first two pages! Not only are favourite characters of mine, Scarlett and Snake Eyes right there in the very first panel of the story, but on the title page we see a team of artists were involved this time, including the simply wonderful Andrew Wildman and Stephen Baskerville working alongside each other.
Inside The Ark, Megatron still has Dr. Biggles-Jones captive on his way back to Cybertron but Spike is also on board and sneaks off to find the rest of himself, namely Fortress Maximus. Not sure why Max has been left in his decapitated robot form (Spike was his HeadMaster companion) to protect the spaceship instead of his battle station form , but oh well.
Hot Spot is one of only two survivors of the battle with Megatron and Cobra, and realises the humans have access to advanced Cybertronian tech, unaware Megatron has made it unusable. Knowing humans can’t be trusted, he sets off to destroy it and I did laugh at Cobra Commander’s threat having to use a different word than “head” in the panel below. Then, is that Starscream Megatron is reactivating? Oh, this could be interesting.
Fortress Maximus seems to have slimmed down somewhat, but then again various artists in the original comic would draw him at different scales, although here he doesn’t even look like himself and more like a regular Autobot. (There’s also no mention of Spike transforming into Cerebros first, instead he just changes into Max’s head directly.) Skydive also joins in the fight and I’d completely forgotten he was lying waiting for his timer to ding and reactivate himself after G.I. Joe #142.
Look, I know this is a classic Transformers comic, and a new classic Transformers comic as far as I’m concerned, but that doesn’t change the fact my main highlight is the return of the Joes, especially Snake Eyes. They may only be on a few pages but when those pages are drawn by Andrew and Stephen you can’t blame me. I had no idea these characters crossed back over into this comic.
They aid Hot Spot but after the weapons are destroyed Cobra surrounds him; they want any Cybertronian technology they can get their hands on, no matter how. He ends up sacrificing himself and explodes(!), although from the art that’s not 100% clear until it’s mentioned later. Meanwhile, Spike and Fortress Maximus also seem to sacrifice themselves by entering the “antimatter stream” powering The Ark, allowing Skydive to rescue Dr. Biggles-Jones.
The ship explodes with Maximus on board, apparently taking Spike with him, although it appears Megatron was also destroyed and we know he’s not easily killed. Plus there was a new toy of him just out, so we’ll see who all return in a future issue. Then it’s on to the back up strip.
Light on plot but heavy on the action, character moments and throwing in a few laughs, it reads very much like one of writer Simon Furman’s monochrome strips from the latter part of the UK comic’s run. Anyone who followed along with my real time read through of the original comic will know this isn’t a complaint, far from it in fact. It’s a brill little strip, and to complete that UK comic flavour it’s even drawn by Geoff Senior (and kudos to Richard Starkings and John Gaushell’s letters below and Sarra Mossoff’s excellent colours).
Even Bumblebee and Bludgeon are back. It feels like the original comic had never been cancelled! On one of the planets Bludgeon and his Decepticons had randomly selected to terrorise, the Autobots have arrived. There’s an underground cache of advanced weaponry and Optimus Prime et all can’t allow them to fall into Decepticon hands, although there’s a hint within his thoughts that Prime actually wants them for himself, playing to the darker version of the character we saw last time.
Hot Rod has been sent down to activate some kind of auto-defence system to help them out, so when this monster appears Prime assumes it’s a hologram. He’s mightily impressed with Hot Rod’s capabilities, especially when its huge alien eyes take out one of Bludgeon’s minions. Then the young Autobot reappears, apologising for not being able to find anything to help in the battle, producing this funny moment from Optimus!
Confirmation then that they were also here to secure weaponry. They leave with the understanding they can’t go down that route again, as that would defy everything they stand for and recalls the war they fought for millions of years. The Next Issue caption mentions “Primal” and “Old Evils” and I still can’t shake the feeling of this leading to a path well trodden. Hopefully Prime’s speech is a hint in itself, that the story won’t simply be treading the same ground again.
To finish off with I couldn’t help but have my attention drawn to two of the advertisements in this issue. One is for a reissue of the original G.I. Joe 12” figure, which we knew as Action Man here in the UK, alongside a cool action figure version to sit among kids’ 80s toys. The other advert is for pants.
Not wishing to end the review on a bum note, I’ll just say how much I really enjoyed both stories this time. I’m not sure if it’s a one-off thing having two strips but I hope it’s something we can have at least once in a while over the next year (no spoilers please). Fingers crossed for more of the same on Sunday 24th November 2024 then. Actually, just typing that has made me realise my decorations will be up just in time for that next issue! Oh, now I’m excited.
Back during OiNK’s weekly issues young readers were treated to five cut-out play masks. They were the typical fare we’d see in comics of the day. Super Naturals gave such masks away with their first two issues, albeit printed on glossy cardboard. OiNK’s may have been printed on regular paper and required gluing them to the customary empty cereal box to make them wearable, but these character faces were so much more entertaining.
Obviously a Dead Fred mask is the most suitable this time of year and in the above selection it’s the only one drawn by the character’s original artist, Eric ‘Wilkie’ Wilkinson, the rest were drawn by Mike Peek. Thanks to co-editor Patrick Gallagher for confirming this after Mike mentioned drawing the Tom Thug one on the OiNK Facebook group. Tom’s face may have incorrect proportions (it isn’t as squished as it should be) but then again it had to fit our faces and none of us had a noggin like Tom’s!
They weren’t originally printed as part of any Hallowe’en celebrations. In fact, they were inside #51 to #55 during February and March 1988 but I thought they’d make for a fun extra post at this time of the year. If you do decide to print them out (and if you do I expect photos to the blog’s socials!) please note that to make sure they’re of a good enough quality when printed they are very big files. The pages were scanned in to measure 22cm across and 30cm top-to-bottom so they’re quite heavy on the memory front (between 15MB and 20MB each).
Also, don’t forget to follow Uncle Pigg’s instructions very carefully, folks. Especially step 3.
I didn’t include these in the reviews at the time because I wanted to keep them for a Hallowe’en after the regular issues had stopped. However, they were part of some of the very best weekly OiNKs and you can click on their covers above to go straight to them. #51 includes Pete and his Pimple and their trouser-press, in #52 Frank Sidebottom had an exclusive scoop about a top BBC radio DJ, #53 saw the debut of Wally of the West, the comic gave a clear (and rhyming) message to bigots in #54 and Tom Thug finally assembled his gang in #55.
Happy spooky season pig pals, and of course let’s not forget the true message of Hallowe’en: Christmas is coming!
Incredible Brit artist Chris Halls (real name Chris Cunningham) created an original cover for the UK’s Aliens #5 from Dark Horse International, and that could be a xenomorph attending a certain type of American political rally! Although, the alien would probably be more civilised. Chris’ work is synonymous with this comic and you can see why, however he’s best known as a music video director and a visual effects artist on many movies in the 90s, including Alien³. There are some absolutely incredible pieces of work to come from him, including a festive cover or two! Can’t wait. This is his second, after Dark Horse wrapped up Trident‘s Volume One with a special issue.
As you can see the usual four strips are all back and surprisingly (for me) the one I enjoyed the most this month was Predator: Cold War. I’ll get to that in a bit, but first up there’s some exciting news at the top of the editorial page, Intro. According to editor Dick Hansom, in the new year UK readers would be getting brand new strips ahead of their American cousins, drawn by the artist of two previous original covers.
Given how #2 and #3’s covers were beautiful (while grotesque and horrifying, naturally) pieces of art, I can’t wait to see that kind of talent on a strip! It feels like DHI is doing everything right and at this point in 1992 it would’ve felt to me like they were quickly becoming the new Marvel UK. But before we get there we continue with the current crop of imported stories, beginning with part four of Mike Richardson’s Newt’s Tale.
This continues to basically be the official adaptation of the movie, albeit for the Special Edition version. For being a story hyped as the movie “told from Newt’s perspective”, she doesn’t even appear until the seventh page in this chapter. She’s on board the APC where Ripley and Gorman watch the video feeds of the horrors from inside the hive, but that whole section is missing.
If it had still been intact it would’ve made sense because we’d experience what Newt was seeing or hearing, but instead the story stays inside the hive the whole time. There are some great images though, such as the alien breaking through the glass of the APC while Ripley is driving. The art is pencilled by Jim Somerville, inked by Brian Garvey, lettered by Pat Brosseau and coloured by Gregory Wright. It makes more references to scenes from the Special Edition a lot of fans may not have yet seen, in this case the discussion about the remote sentries. As for Newt, she’s just stuck in as little panels here and there to remind the readers she’s still about.
Eventually we get to the scene where Ripley promises Newt she’ll never leave her and lays her down to rest in the medical bay, so we all know what’s happening next month. Happily, the strip does see fit to include a couple of moments that made my mum and I laugh when we both watched Aliens for the first time together on my birthday, a few days before Christmas way back in 1992.
The Motion Tracker news pages have plenty of interesting contemporary nuggets for this retro-loving fan. The bit about how Alien³ had been received around the world just proved Americans had poor taste (I’m kidding) and the news about Abyss corrects last issue’s error about Aliens not being filmed in widescreen. There’s also a competition for a Return of the Living Dead video which hilariously admits its inclusion here is tenuous. Finally, the comic itself helped organise what seemed like a really interesting Alien exhibition in London and publicised it with two rather bland photographs.
In the middle of the comic is the Predator back up strip, part five of Mark Verheiden’s Cold War, pencilled by Ron Randall, inked by Steve Mitchell, lettered by Clem Robins and coloured by Chris Chalenor and Rachelle Menashe. With our two leads (Detective Schaefer and Lt. Ligachev) finally in the same location it feels like things have stepped up a gear. On a side note, with it being spooky season as I write this I’ll soon be watching the first two movies at long last to get a better understanding of the franchise. I’ve only just realised Richard Chaves is in the first one, who will forever be Lt. Colonel Paul Ironhorse to me. (If you know you know.)
“None of us had come to the oil station willingly. In that sense, we were all wards of the state, doing what we were told because there was nothing else to do”
Lt. Ligachev
So, as explained last month it’s got the same basic plot as Aliens and it’s now all set up, so we’re good to go. As Ligachev sees the dead bodies of those she used to work alongside, she reminisces about how their presence wasn’t originally wanted, how eventually they all got to know each other, and how the Soviet Union forcing them all to be out in the freezing wilderness soon became secondary. They even played games. It was hard graft for everyone, but they’d enjoyed it.
Initially taking the Americans as prisoners, she pulls Schaefer to the side to tell him she knows what they’ve really come all this way for. When they find one of the scientists rambling madly on the floor about the aliens, Ligachev explodes at Schaefer’s quips, asking him what kind of man could see someone suffer and not care. In this moment Schaefer’s internal thoughts betray how his opinion of the Soviet soldier is changing to one of respect.
The Predators themselves only make an appearance on the final page. Apart from the first issue they haven’t been seen much but their presence has always been felt; they’re the reason all of these disparate people have been thrown together and there’s a mystery as to why creatures who require so much heat to survive would be out in the frozen wastes. It’s an interesting story, but more importantly than anything else the human characters make it compulsive.
For example, back in New York we get a few pages of Sheriff Rasche from a previous Predator comic using his own detective skills to get to the bottom of what’s really happening in Russia, where he’s convinced the aliens have returned. I like this guy. He’s concerned for his friend and isn’t taking any crap in getting to the bottom of it all. (I particularly like the visitor book entry.) With his fears confirmed I hope he makes it out to join the others. I think he could bring some much needed humour to whatever the climax will entail.
Meanwhile, authorities command Sgt. Yashin to take command from Ligachev, who the Soviets feel is being too accommodating to the Americans. As per usual in these stories said authorities see everyone as expendable when there’s a potential new weapon to be had. (See what I mean about the Aliens parallels?) The chapter ends with our leads sharing a moment over a clichéd Russian vodka as Schaeffer theorises over the Predators’ arrival.
Surely the mystery can’t simply be that they got off at the wrong stop? I hope not. I’m not sure how long this story lasts and I won’t be looking that up but so far I’m enjoying the human element of things and the slow build of the threat they face. The pacing is superb, like a well crafted blockbuster in fact, which makes sense given the franchise it’s based on (and the comic’s namesake it appears to have been heavily inspired by).
This month’s Technical Readout concentrates on one of the coolest vehicles from my teen movie watching and I’m almost positive one of my mates owned a model kit of it. I just loved this thing so I had to include it in the review. At the top-right you’ll see a behind-the-scenes photo of the full-sized one used alongside the models, interior sets and mock-ups. I wish we could get more such photos but the comic seems to prefer to keep things within the universe of the films, rather than the making-of features in the Alien³ mini-series.
Rolls Royce should be very happy upon reading this since they’ll apparently still be in business so far into the future, although it was really meant to go that fast? Maybe in a straight line… and downhill. I remember the terrifying scene set inside the APC as Ripley and Gorman watched the Colonel Marines’ heartbeats stop one-by-one as they fled the alien hive, a scene which also played out to great effect in Jurassic World. A homage, perhaps?
Speaking of fleeing an alien hive, that’s exactly what the least likeable selection of human characters and their one-dimensional android character have to do in part five of Jerry Prosser’s Hive. The What Has Gone Before pages feature some of the US Dark Horse covers and they’re great pieces of art in their own right but just compare them to the ones used by the UK comic, in particular the Chris Halls covers to come. Stick with the OiNK Blog and you’ll see what I mean over the next year.
As I explained last time Mayakovsky, Lish and Gil’s ship was struck by lightning as they tried to leave the planet after their android alien Norbert was destroyed by the real aliens. As Newt told us previously they mostly come at night and that’s what our characters fear as they look upon the hive with only two guns to their name. However, they do have the stupid comic invention, the Inhibitors. Designed to stop the aliens sensing them, still no explanation is given as to how this is possible but there’s something else which doesn’t make sense either.
According to Mayakovsky the Inhibitors only have a field of about three meters in all directions. So these world-destroying creatures, so successful in their ability to overcome anything in their quest to colonise and spread, can only sense humans if they’re nearly on top of them? (Or they forget what they were chasing when they get close to an Inhibitor?) We know this isn’t the case, and combined with the ludicrous plan below it all feels too forced. It’s trying too hard to create tension and instead comes across as silly.
They could stay in their ship until the storm passes but they say it’s too dangerous to trap themselves in their tiny escape pod with no weapons. So they decide to go through the hive instead? Some explanation about following Norbert’s energy reading to take them directly to the ship doesn’t make any more sense! The Inhibitors mean they can sneak their way through, but surely that’d also mean they could just stay on their ship, then walk around the hive when the storm passes?
Admittedly, there are some good moments as far as the art is concerned, such as this one when Lish shines her torch right on an alien in the darkness. Kelley Jones’ art and Les Dorscheid’s colours (with Clem on letters again) do bring a great deal of atmosphere to the proceedings but can’t take away the ludicrousness of it all. I mean, the Inhibitors stop the aliens from seeing a torch light shining right in their eyes… or whatever they have for eyes?
The last strip, the two-page Aliens Vs Predator II written by Randy Stradley and drawn by Chris Warner has potential with its tiny snippets of plot and character every month but, while I don’t want to end the review with two duds, it’s frustrating to only get such a small part every month. This impressive spread is the entire chapter for this issue. I love the black and white art but more would happen in those tiny daily tabloid newspaper comic strips from childhood.
Don’t get me wrong I’m still enjoying the comic. The two main Aliens strips have disappointed me these last two issues, but only because they showed so much potential before that. When the crossover strip finally comes to an end I’ll read back over it to see how it reads then. Meanwhile, the Predator strip continues to impress issue-after-issue and the contemporary features are always interesting. We’ve a long way to go. Let’s see if that early potential is followed up on with #6 on Thursday 19th November 2024.
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