All posts by Phil Boyce

Aliens, Comic Reviews

ALiENS #3: GET AWAY FROM HER, YOU BiTCH!

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Beginning with another Paul Johnson cover, the third issue of Dark Horse International’s first (and ultimately flagship) comic really settles into its format this month with a whopping four strips and well written features across its 52 pages. Aliens is a meaty read and even for the time it was great value for £1.50. I’ve so many issues remaining but already I’m really glad I chose to cover this in real time on the blog.

So, inside the first strip is part two of Newt’s Tale, Mike Richardson’s retelling of the film from the young girl’s perspective. Over its 13 pages there are some genuinely shocking moments that, with hindsight, really seem to add to the character so brilliantly portrayed by Carrie Henn (amazingly, her first acting role) and the haunted child that first appeared to Ripley and the marines. 

In a secured bunker the colonists shelter in hiding from the creatures that have appeared out of nowhere, seemingly not piecing together they’ve come from the thing that had attached itself to Newt’s dad’s face. Of course, the reader knows that alien was the queen Ripley would ultimately face. We see Newt’s mum and brother Timmy here also, her mum Annie convincing someone to give her a gun and she stays awake all night as the kids rest.

Banging noises from outside suddenly occur and arguments begin. We know what’s out there but the colonists have lost contact with their men sent to the nest to exterminate the creatures, thinking they’d easily outnumber them and just set it alight, not knowing what the aliens are actually capable of. In a moment deliberately intended to frustrate the reader we see two sides argue over opening the door. It’s frustrating because we know which side will win, that their self-imposed macho superiority will lead to disaster for everyone, including all of the children.

But there’s no reasoning with them and as soon as we turn the page they’re overrun in seconds. This page (pencils by Jim Somerville, inks by Brian Garvey, colours by Gregory Wright, letters by Pat Brosseau) is so much better than the overly cartoonish chest burster scene last time, but it’s only the beginning of the horrors over the next few pages. Such as Annie telling her children she’s sorry before aiming her gun at Timmy!

Clearly she sees what’s happening around her and, as heartbreaking and terrifying as the moment is for her, at least it would be instant and they wouldn’t suffer at the hands of the aliens. It’s only a few panels but it hits hard. Newt begs her not to and instead they make a run for the ventilation shafts where we’ve previously seen the kids playing. They know where they lead; they can escape.

To see it played out, even if it is in comic form rather than celluloid brings the cold, harsh reality of it to bear

Timmy and Newt are bundled inside just before Annie is grabbed from behind and a curtain of blood pours down in front of the shaft entrance a few feet from the kids. The most shocking moment of all sees Timmy jump out and pick up Annie’s gun, shouting that he’ll save his mummy. He shoots the alien, its acid blood squirting over his face and blinding him. But as if that wasn’t enough for the small child, he’s killed right in front of Newt, and this is where the chapter ends.

Of course we already knew Newt would end up being the only survivor, we knew all of the mums and dads and their children died, but it all happened off screen. To see it played out, even if it is in comic form rather than celluloid brings the cold, harsh reality of it to bear. After this part of the story it’s gone from being an interesting curiosity to the best strip of the comic.

The middle pages might initially feel like a strange place to have a back up strip, but that’s where Mark Verheiden’s Predator: Cold War tale is, sandwiched between the two Aliens stories and, while I don’t really understand a lot of what’s going on in its 12 pages, I’m still enjoying it and am eager to learn more about these particular extra-terrestrials. As Lt. Ligachev makes her way back to Siberia the aliens are preparing for another hunt at the oil pumping station.

As you can see there are pages set on board their spacecraft somewhere in the frozen wastes (pencils by Ron Randall, inks by Steve Mitchell, colours by Chris Chalenor and Rachelle Menashe, letters by Clem Robins) and while Ligachev’s internal narration of what she’s about to face again is well written, I’m pretty lost when it comes to the images. What is that disc-shaped object it’s taken from the walls and why is it discarded like that? This would probably makes sense if I’d seen the film of course.

As I’ve said before I’ll be doing so this Hallowe’en so I’ll assume (hopefully correctly) that this is all self-explanatory to Predator fans. I look forward to finding out for myself though, and the air of mystery around these creatures while I read only acts to heighten my interest. So please, as much as you might think explaining it would help, let me discover it for myself (the spooky season isn’t far off anyway).

The attack has begun and the first victim is a dog, which lures in one of the men, who then sees the aliens and makes a desperate run back to his colleagues, giving away the location of everyone else. The way they move through the complex and dispose of anyone in their path is chilling, even with the still images of a comic it’s clear to me they’re doing it for sport, for recreation, and there are some brutal moments.

Instead of running for safety, some of the men grab shotguns in an attempt to slow down the attackers. They know they’re no match for them, they know they’re alien and can’t be stopped, but they also know Ligachev is on her way and their last desperate gambit is to hold them off until their reinforcements arrive. But the first thing they come across is a load of their men strung up by their feet, blood pouring out from the gaping holes where their heads used to be.

Upon seeing it, one of them comments, “What kind of hell is this?” After a few more pages of gruesome killings, one man at a time, we arrive at the final moments of the strip and one of the Predators repeats back the very same line as the man’s torso slides down its spear. All dead, the Predators lie in wait for Ligachev and her military might. It’s atmospheric, I’ll give it that, and as an introduction to these creatures it works. I’m just impatient to see more of the interesting lead character, so I’m looking forward to the next issue.

The other main Aliens strip is the third chapter of Jerry Prosser’s Hive, originally the main story in the first issue. Mayakovsky and Lish send Norbert (the alien synthetic) and their poor dog, Max down to the surface of the planet where they find the aliens around the hive are sleeping! Max soon finds another lander ship with humans and it’s surrounded by more sleeping aliens who appear to have nodded off mid-attack.

Is it wrong of me to kind of love Norbert? I mean, he’s still programmed to act like a proper alien as you’ll soon see, but to see this frightening beast looking after Max and reporting back is genuinely funny without ever breaking the illusion of the universe created by the films. However, over the next two pages that affection soon disappears as his programming takes over with some horrific results, as drawn by Kelly Jones with Les Dorscheid’s colours and Clem’s letters.

It appears these humans (hinted at last time) have used something called “infrasonic suppression” to put the xenomorphs into a deep state of hibernation while they collected the slime our lead characters have also come for. Mayakovsky is rather jealous of their idea; it could’ve saved him a lot of time and money in developing XL1 (Norbert). But as Norbert tracks down and kills all of the crew one-by-one, part of the ship’s computer systems becomes damaged, and you just know what that part controlled, don’t you?

Yep, the aliens are now awake and have surrounded the ship. Will they realise Norbert is a synth? After all, in the films it’s established they won’t attack a synthetic human unless they’re attacked first, that they know the difference. Surely they’ll see through this? Anyway, the chapter ends with a worrying development for Max. Given Norbert’s goodbye, I don’t know if I want to see what happens next!

At the very back of the issue is the next instalment of the strange little Alien Vs Predator strip I mentioned in #1 of Alien³ (actually, it’s called Alien Vs Predator II, so I must’ve missed the original in the first volume of the comic). The strip was written in two-page chunks for Dark Horse Insider magazine in the US and ran for 14 issues. It’s written by Dark Horse co-founder Randy Stradley (Marvel Star Wars, Crimson Empire, Jedi Council) and illustrated by Chris Warner (Terminator, Alien Legion, co-creator of Barb Wire).

As you can see there’s not a lot of story to tell in two pages but by the end it’ll have lasted for 28 pages in total so we’ll see if it develops beyond a long battle between the two alien species. As I said in the review for #1 of Alien³ these two franchises hadn’t met yet on film, so this could’ve been exciting for fans of both in 1992. This will take until next summer to complete so I’m hoping there’s scope over that time for more depth.

There are the usual plethora of features in this issue including news and the Technical Readout section, the latter also containing this spread about synthetic humans, a key part of the Alien universe. There was an interview with Lance Henrikson in that one issue I bought as a teenager and I remember being disappointed that he didn’t mention the Super Mario Bros movie he was in for all of five seconds. As if he would! (No pictures of Ash from the first film though, which is a shame.)

The beginning of the Alien³ video had an exciting trailer for Alien War, a place in London where fans could experience the terror of the second film by being led through an area by Colonial Marines while being stalked by a giant xenomorph. It actually began life in Glasgow and it’s this original setting that gets its own feature in this issue. I always thought the trailer looked fantastic and would’ve given anything to have gone with my like-minded friends but alas these things just never came to Northern Ireland at the time.

At the back of the comic underneath the letters page is the latest comics checklist and the first non-Aliens title from DHI was about to launch at the end of September. Featuring an Indiana Jones back up strip (because of George Lucas’ connection), Star Wars #1 surely couldn’t miss, right? Thing is, it’s not mentioned in any of the checklists or adverts in Jurassic Park which launched the following year, so it mustn’t have lasted long, which is surprising.

Upon checking I can confirm it only lasted ten months and was abruptly cancelled even though it advertised the next issue and #11 appeared in the checklists. It’s another franchise (alongside Predator) that I haven’t really seen (I know – unforgivable!) so until I do I doubt I’ll collect this particular DHI comic, but it’s good to see them expanding already by this point in this read through, and I can’t wait to see what else they released that I might bring to the blog.

(Actually, I already have a completed set of one of their other comics! That’ll start in January 2025 and I’ll leave its name a mystery for just a bit longer.)

Three issues down and plenty to go. This comic is already pretty incredible, it’s going to be a great read through if it keeps on improving as it has already from one month to the next. Aside from the crossover strip I’m eager for the next chapter of all the stories, there’s not one of the three main stories that I’d say is a weak link. A great selection of extras too this month. Aliens #4 will be reviewed on Tuesday 24th September 2024, but before then is both #2 (Monday 26th August) and #3 (Monday 16th September) of Alien³! A busy month ahead. Bring it.

ALiEN³ iSSUE 1 < > ALiEN³ iSSUE 2

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Comic Reviews, OiNK Contributors

DAViD LEACH CONQUERS THE UNiVERSE #3: DO YOU EXPECT ME TO TALK (AND TALK)?

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Did you know OiNK cartoonist David Leach is also a secret agent who has saved us from Godzilla-like monsters and Predator-like alien invasions? Well, if you didn’t pick up the first two issues of his occasional comic series David Leach Conquers the Universe now you know! It’s been a long time coming (#2 was released seven years ago) but #3 has finally arrived and is available now for all pig pals to buy.

In his four-issue series David’s character is self-deprecating, sarcastic and skilled at annoying the baddies with his endless patter, all the while being a hilarious spoof of action movie stars. This issue moves into familiar James Bond territory with a villain who has a suitably outlandish scheme, living in a secret lair with a band of minions (in this case a faceless robotic army). We even get a brilliantly funny ‘Q’-type scene in which he picks the most useless piece of tech imaginable, one which you instantly know is setting up a very specific pun for later in the issue, making the pay off even more satisfying (and hilarious).

As in the previous issues we get strange interludes of some people bent over a tabletop role-playing game who seemingly control the scenarios in which David finds himself. His reference to the mysterious “They” shows us he’s clearly aware of some higher power but it always comes across as conspiratorial, leading to ridicule from his family in a great opening scene where he’s hired for a new top secret job right in front of them.

My favourite moment is when he’s reminded about how he’s meant to keep a low profile in his role as a secret agent for M.A.R.S. (not Destro’s organisation in G.I. Joe, the acronym here is much better) before being lectured about appearing on Come Dine With Me, something the real David actually did back in 2013! I nearly bust a gut laughing at this moment.

I won’t give too much away here about the villain, his profession or his overall plan because it’s one of the highlights of the issue. What I will say is, after Godzilla and Predator, David clearly had his eyes on the Bond franchise next and as a fan of those films I can say he does not disappoint! Having met already, a later scene has our sort-of-hero notice something different about the man who now holds him at gunpoint.

The character of David here has an innate ability to talk. In fact, very often throughout the series his mouth gets him into all sorts of trouble because he doesn’t seem to have a brain-mouth filter. Just how much of the fictional David is based on the real-life one? I couldn’t possibly answer that, but you do come away with the impression that he’s having a good laugh at himself throughout these comics.

There are so many hilarious moments here and it’s so difficult not to tell you about more of them because they’re that good! It’s a catch-22 situation of course; I want to tell you more about the contents so you know just how brilliantly funny it is and you’ll want to buy it, but if I do so it’d ruin those moments for you and you wouldn’t enjoy it as much as I did. Plus, this is David’s job, for which he deserves to be paid for his work and at a measly £4.99 this is a bargain for the amount of laughs you’ll get in return.

Not only was I delighted to see a third issue after I’d assumed there’d be no more, the addition of the new ‘#3 in a four-issue series’ banner on the cover shows there’s another on the horizon. With said banner and the open ending (the panel below is not it) I do hope this means David has already begun working on it and we won’t have to wait as long for the conclusion.

Why have I reviewed the third issue first? Simple, because it’s new and, while I will be adding older comics released by OiNK’s cartoonists as the blog continues, any new releases will get covered straight away. No, you don’t need to have read the first two issues of David Leach Conquers the Universe to enjoy this one, but they’re all so good why wouldn’t you?

Published by Aylesbury comics shop Dead Universe Comics their website is down at the time of writing but it’s easy to order by phone. They’ll be happy to take your order on 07852 836307 and for £4.99 you’re going to get 36 pages chock full of brilliant art and even better laughs.

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Alien³, Comic Reviews

ALiEN³ MOViE SPECiAL #1: THiS iS RUMOUR CONTROL

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While it may say ‘Monthly’ in the Dark Horse International border on the cover, the three issues of the Alien³ Movie Special were released every three weeks (bit of a pattern there) like the earlier editions of Jurassic Park would be the following year when it was also publishing its movie adaptation. Instead of being printed as part of their regular Aliens comic, DHI decided to release this adaptation separately and include a wealth of fascinating extras.

What I instantly like as I flick through the issue is the fact that the free poster is actually free! It’s separate from the rest of the comic and isn’t just the middle pages. (I’m looking at you The Lost World: Jurassic Park and Doctor Who Magazine.) It’s not the image you’d expect it to be from the cover but it’s still a cracker and on the gloss paper it really sizzles.

The comic’s cover is taken straight from their American publication rather than being an original like their monthly and it’s by Arthur Suydam (Marvel Zombies, Deadpool, Moon Knight). Inside, the editorial by Dick Hansom welcomes us to both this limited run comic and DHI as a whole, promising many more titles to come over the years. Of course, DHI would close down in 1994 but I love their ambition. While I hadn’t really discovered James Bond for myself at the time, that definitely would’ve been one for the blog if they’d gotten around to bringing it over.

There’s an interesting feature right off the bat written by the main title’s regular features writer Dave Hughes. 20 Things You Should Know About Alien³ is a smorgasbord of little tidbits about the film which was still 16 days away from its UK release date. What you as blog readers should know is that I’m a big fan of Alien³, even more so today than at the time.

I always enjoyed it and thought it made for an original contribution to the series, making the first three films very different from each other. Some friends weren’t as crash-hot on it though. However, since then the Collector’s Edition has been released and to me it raises Alien³ up to an equal footing alongside the first two classics. In it there’s a lot more story, a lot more to the alien itself and some of the characters we only saw a little of are now central to the plot. In the case of Golic, (played by Eighth Doctor Paul McGann) he went from being a background player to being a main lead and central to the more complex plot.

So it’s interesting to see there were more creatures due to be featured at one point, including a bigger, armoured version of the facehugger and there’s mention of the ‘ox-burster’ being replaced by the ‘dog-burster’. This was switched back again for the Collector’s Edition, which altogether is much closer to David Fincher‘s original vision for the film. Point four above hints at the chaos in pre-production (pre-Fincher) and you can read more about that in the review for Aliens #1.

Point 13 stands out as well to me, both that the film wasn’t trashed across the board and also what it says about American fans. According to Dave, of course. 

So now we move on to what is essentially the main event, the 25 pages of strip that make up the first part of the comics adaptation. For those new to the blog I’ll quickly explain I’m not usually a fan of movie adaptations, ever since being disappointed with them in childhood. However, since writing the blog I’ve seen some which definitely start off well and have potential to be really good (so I’ll always give them a chance), but ultimately they’ve fallen apart because there’s so much to cram in.

That’s the main issue here. There are only three chapters, one less than Jurassic Park was given, so within these 25 pages we’re already a third of the way through the film! As such it rockets along and leaves everything I love about the film (the atmosphere, the characterisations, the unique portrayals, the mystery, the plot development) behind in order to simply copy and paste passages from the script into speech balloons and accompany them with something looking vaguely like what we saw on the screen. There doesn’t seem to be any proper attempt to adapt this adaptation for a different medium.

Strangely, it starts off by showing us Ripley being impregnated by the symbiote after Newt dies in her cryo tube. In the film this scene was presented as quick-cut moments between the credits so we didn’t know what was really going on. We knew there was something wrong but the scene later when the alien doesn’t kill Ripley was a surprise and the audience could start putting two-and-two together, but here it’s all laid out for us before anyone in the UK would’ve seen the film.

Another issue is the art pencilled by Christopher Taylor (Old Man Quill, Hulk, Blood Pack), inked by Rick Magyar (Captain America, Deathlok, Rom), coloured by Matt Webb (Spider-Girl, Adventures of The Mask, Fish Police) and lettered by Jim Massara (Transformers, The Real Ghostbusters, Droopy). I do like how it’s all framed in black, giving it an overall darker feel, possibly trying to mimic that atmosphere, but no one resembles their on screen actor in any way, not even Ripley. It also doesn’t help that all of the bald white men look identical here. There’s just no way of following who is who, who they’re talking to, or what’s happening to whom.

Moments that were jump scares in the film just don’t work and a lack of narrative captions doesn’t help either, so scene changes are very jarring, especially when they involve the same characters. Even for someone who has seen the film countless times this is a very confusing read. Unfortunately, script-wise it’s a very by-the-book strip by writer Steve Grant (The Punisher, X, Whisper). I don’t envy his task (as Don McGregor told us in The Lost World: Jurassic Park comic it’s ludicrously difficult to adapt a movie to the medium) but the end result feels even more rushed than most.

Take this scene above. When you first turn the page it certainly catches the eye, that’s for sure. But it’s only from watching the film so many, many times that I know what the characters are doing, why they’re lighting candles (even that isn’t obvious), or what happens in the sequence that sees one of them killed and has the other two running in circles trying to escape in sheer panic. In the film this is a terrifying scene, expertly directed and lit by nothing more than tiny flames.

The latter part of the comic houses more features by Dave, beginning with a look at the complex back and forth between the movie and UK model company Halcyon. I didn’t think I’d find this interesting but it really is, especially when founder Barry Jones admits their model of the alien itself isn’t accurate due to changes made during production of the film. They kept the model as it was because in a stationary pose it just didn’t look right with the changes, while it looked excellent in the film.

Unfortunately for readers at the time it’s a bit spoiler-heavy. Could they not have kept some of these details back at least until the film was released here? Then again, the fate of Newt and Hicks was already in the strip the reader would’ve just read. What’s most interesting is the fact that there was no definitive chest-burster alien to draw from before now, that Alien³ was the first time we actually saw one in its entirety.

“To me, the alien wasn’t just a monster, it was a character”

David Fincher, director Alien³

After that is a strange little two-page black-and-white Aliens vs Predator strip involving no more than three panels and a splash page that tells us the predators are responsible for spreading the aliens throughout the galaxy. It’s to continue across both Alien³ and the monthly Aliens so I’m sure I’ll show you a more interesting bit at some stage. After this is the best feature of the issue, called Trouble Comes in ³s, again by Dave.

Thankfully he moves beyond the heavily publicised pre-production problems and instead concentrates on the actual production of the film. Again, as great as it is I can’t help but feel it should’ve been held back for at least the second issue. Okay, so I don’t know yet what that one will contain but this is very spoiler heavy for any comic fans reading before watching the film.

Even the ending is given away! I do like how the feature praises first-time director David Fincher, who was unfairly maligned for problems the film faced even though they were beyond his control. What he did produce was great, and that newer version of the film in particular is testament to that. 

There’s mention too of the more complex story involving the capture and release of the alien by Paul McGann’s character, all of which was excised in the original cut before being placed back in over a decade later. The article also works as a fascinating look at the beginning of what would be an incredible directing career. Finally, effects technician Chris Halls is a name you’ll see more of on the blog as he’s the artist of some stunning covers for the UK comic to come. 

The issue ends with a brief one-page feature I won’t include because it’s a very quick interview with an incredibly arrogant British special effects supervisor who boasts about how his team made life awkward for the Americans working on the film and he does nothing but slag off (that’s the best way to describe it) the script. Not what I’d include in the comic when it completely relies on said film.

Out of the 48 pages in total the 23 that don’t contain comic strip are by far the best and as a fan of the movie I’ve found them fascinating, not only for the information on the film they contain but for how this eagerly anticipated sequel was covered at the time. As such, I look forward to more of those pages in three weeks when #2 of the Alien³ Movie Special leaps from the shadows and on to the blog on Monday 26th August 2024, and before that on Tuesday 20th August remember to check in on Aliens #3 too.

ALiENS iSSUE 2 < > ALiENS iSSUE 3

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Comic Reviews, Death's Head

DEATH’S HEAD #10: A STARK ENDiNG

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It’s been such a fun ride but all good things must come to an end (to use two clichés) and this is the final issue of Marvel UK’s Death’s Head, which came to an exciting end on this day 35 years ago when he clashed with Arno Stark, the Iron Man of (the then-futuristic year of) 2020. The cover is by regulars Bryan Hitch and Mark Farmer, but for the strip itself Bryan goes it alone, with Euan Peters (Knights of Pendragon, Action Force, Transformers colourist/designer/editor) colouring behind Annie Halfacree’s letters, with Steve White editing and Simon Furman bringing it all to an end.

Not that the story reads like an ending. Strangely, even though the final issues of both Dragon’s Claws and Death’s Head were flagged as such in the editorial pages of Transformers, neither of their last editions actually said so, although with hindsight it’s clear the editorial team knew. While the Head Lines page still includes the “Subscribe Now!” banner it’s followed by a glimpse of Death’s Head crossing back over into Fantastic Four after they’d appeared in #9. It’s clear this is telling us where we can see him now that his comic is over, but at the time it could easily be mistaken for a regular plug for a crossover before #11.

Now trapped in 2020 (what a year to be sent to!) Death’s Head is making the most of things and business is good. In fact, in a turn up for the books, for once the far future dystopian time of the comic (8162) actually has less crime than 2020 according to our main character. So he can afford to be choosy. As such, he’s suspicious about his latest client. But first, let’s check in on our special guest.

Both of Iron Man of 2020’s stories so far were selected as back up strips in Marvel UK’s Transformers comic

So who is the Iron Man of 2020? Arno Stark may have inherited Stark Industries but he’s no hero. Instead, he uses the suit in his role as a mercenary for hire for individuals and sabotage for corporations. This was his third appearance in Marvel comics. The first was in the rebooted Machine Man of 2020 mini-series where the old tech of Machine Man won over the futuristic Iron Man thanks to his having a good heart.

Then in Spider-Man, in a plot I won’t go into detail about Arno travelled back in time to 1986 to avert a disaster involving his home city, his business and his family. But his means of doing so put him at odds with Spidey, who defeated him. Upon returning to the future his entire city had been destroyed, taking his family with it. In a surprise turn, we were left feeling sorry for him. Both of these stories were selected as back up strips in Marvel UK’s Transformers comic.

There’s no mention here of the events in the Spider-Man strip but he is in New York, a different city than normal so it would seem to follow on after it. In the opening pages we find out he’s been hired to protect some foreign dignitaries. The only thing is, they don’t seem to understand why; they haven’t hired him and say they aren’t in danger. Some hitmen do turn up and Arno kills them all very easily, after being told to take no prisoners. But something doesn’t sit right with him about the job.

We then take a trip to a large mansion somewhere and a very rich man by the name of Chance and his English butler Athey have been watching the events pan out. In fact, their conversation has acted as a running commentary over the opening pages. They’re part of The Dicemen, a group who appeared in various Marvel comics although there’s little information about them online. They’re basically a bunch of rich elites who like to play games with other people’s lives.

One hard and fast rule of The Dicemen is to never use the same players twice, but Chance thinks there’s more fun to be had in using Iron Man again, especially when Athey shows him a news report of Death’s Head taking down some local warlords. The game is on. Athey will approach both of them, Death’s Head for a hit and Arno as the protector. Then, after eight pages of strip in his own comic it’s time for the Freelance Peace-Keeping Agent to finally make his entrance.

That reminds me of something we’d have seen from RoboCop. I love it. This criminal group have kept a young child hostage for a ransom and Death’s Head easily disposes of them, partly thanks to a collapsing ceiling in the middle of the fight. After seeing him rescuing another young boy last month and how he speaks to this child does our anti-hero have a soft spot we didn’t know about? I do like how the kid is seen playing with his face spikes as they exit the building together.

Arno isn’t the only one suspicious of the job he’s been given. Death’s Head’s inner thoughts betray what he really thinks about Athey after he’s hired to kill two diplomats and given half the large fee up front. It all seems too easy. So both men have been hired and in the middle of a shopping mall the diplomats are arguing with Iron Man that they didn’t ask for, nor need protection as he pushes them into a lift, and it’s time for Death’s Head to tell someone else to talk to the hand.

The fight scene is classic Death’s Head and classic Simon Furman, with the quips matching the violence panel after panel. But Arno is deadly serious and the anger he feels at being potentially set up is taken out on the mechanoid as he blasts them both into the night sky, shouting that he won’t let him butcher innocent people in what feels like (when reading this fully, in context) that he’s trying to convince himself he’s actually doing the right thing. It’s actual character development from someone who only cared about money before. It seems losing his family has brought out his better side.

Then we turn the page to this spread below which contained a genuinely shocking moment had the front cover not used it to promote the story. You can’t really blame them though, of course they were going to use it. Although, from the speech balloon on the cover I thought Death’s Head had taken over Iron Man’s suit somehow, so I was initially a bit disappointed I was wrong in that conclusion. That disappointment soon turned to laughs when I saw what happened next though.

Again his hand is used as a great gag and over the next page or two Death’s Head tells Arno that he believes him and agrees that they should work together to get to the bottom of who has used them, however he’s still angry with him and just has to work that out of his system first, by beating seven shades of blue out of him. Then, clipping his head back into place like a Transformer Headmaster he’s able to detect a camera filming them for Chance and locates the signal controlling it.

Cue a few pages of Chance panicking before Athey, a long time loyal member of The Dicemen himself, shoots his boss point blank in the face and sets the scene up to look like a suicide. He leaves their money in cash so as to trick Death’s Head and Iron Man into hanging around, but they soon pick up a detonation signal and narrowly escape the destruction of the mansion. Then it all very suddenly ends in two panels.

This is directly after the explosion panel. It feels very cut down and a bit of a rushed ending, making way as it does for two pages of panels with yellow borders, telling of how Spratt arrives in 2020 and crashes Death’s Head’s ship, somehow bringing Big Shot with him who takes up the final splash page, coupled with a Happily Ever After caption! While this may have been the original cliffhanger taking us to #11, the rushed ending with Iron Man makes it seem like this whole section was added in at the last minute. But why do this for the final issue?

It’s not how I expected it to end. Yes, Death’s Head has been a surprising comic on many occasions but I did expect something along the lines of how the final chapter of Dragon’s Claws wrapped things up satisfactorily while leaving things open-ended. Was the chop brought down suddenly on the writer? It’d explain why the secretive woman hinted at in the last couple of issues isn’t mentioned, the mystery not revealed, actually not even acknowledged here. That’s incredibly annoying. But perhaps there’s hope in a graphic novel to come. More on that below.

There’s a bit of a dig at those
high up in Marvel UK

After the strip comes the Head to Head letters page and a chance for the comic to throw out more hints that this is the final issue. Perhaps there were instructions from on high to not mention the end for some reason. Perhaps they didn’t want potential buyers flicking through the pages, realising there’d be no more and not buying it. Whereas, mentioning it in stablemate comics may lead those readers to part with their pocket money for a collector’s final issue. This is all speculation of course.

However, as you’ll see there’s a bit of a dig at those high up in Marvel UK in the answer to the first letter. For the second letter, in response to a lack of free gifts the reader is told to go and check out a different comic, but the most obvious (again, with hindsight) hint comes at the end of the response to the final letter. It was always annoying when a comic just stopped without telling us, so kudos to the team for trying to tell the readers without really telling them.

So what’s next for Death’s Head on the blog? Is that the end of it? Not quite. After his original series he popped up in a serialised story in Strip (between #13 and #20) which was then collected in graphic novel The Body in Question. Given the real time nature of the blog you can expect that in October next year. It’s a long wait for me but I set these rules so I must follow them. I can’t wait to read it though. Will I be covering his return as Death’s Head II and III? Let me finish his original timeline first and we’ll see what the future holds.

After that frustrating ending I really can’t wait for the graphic novel to see if any further questions are answered. If they are that would explain some things about this issue. Don’t tell me if you know though! I’ll find out next year. This series has been a blast from beginning to end. I can’t believe it’s taken me so long to read his own comic after I enjoyed him in Transformers decades ago, but Death’s Head was certainly worth the wait, yes?

iSSUE NiNE < > THE BODY iN QUESTiON

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Comic Reviews, The Sleeze Brothers

THE SLEEZE BROTHERS #2: ViSiON PROFESSiONALS

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Between the 80’s 3D movie craze and the 90’s fascination with labelling videogames as “interactive movies”, this second edition of Marvel UK’s (under their Epic imprint) The Sleeze Brothers feels perfectly of its time. Written by John Carnell, it’s also perfectly timed for this blog too, given the other classic comic I reviewed the second issue of just six days ago.

The creative team all return this issue. Co-creator Andy Lanning is pencilling, Stephen Baskerville is inking, Steve White is colouring, Bambos Georgiou is lettering and Richard Starkings is editing. With this being a pre-determined mini-series of six issues I’m assuming the whole of the original team will be present and correct for the remaining issues. I certainly hope so. So, on to that opening page and by coincidence it pastiches the movie last week’s comic review was based on.

In a nutshell, the Nexus Infinity Broadcasting network (whose ‘N.I.B.’ logo design is a lot like the Men In Black movie logo, even though this comic came first) is run by The Reverend Smiler While, a man whose grin could give The Joker a run for his money. He’s selling the latest in TV tech, a system that allows the viewer to be completely surrounded by their programmes.

But this isn’t just all-encompassing video, there’s something much more dangerous at play here that makes it the perfect idea for an out-there Sleeze Brothers plot. We get to see the scale of the outfit in question when Smiler hires the brothers and they head to the N.I.B. headquarters in all of its 80s futurism glory. There’s even an Orson Welles-spoof character inside. As a fan of his movies and of course his War of the Worlds radio broadcast, and after the Aliens opener, was this issue made specifically for me?!

The faceless board members are perfect too. But all is not well. It appears Orsum Wurlds isn’t the fantastic creator he thinks he is. In fact, it appears he’s taken more credit than he was due. Is this a take on the behind-the-scenes controversy over the writing of Citizen Kane? Perhaps, but this goes further and has the original creator of the Reel-to-Real technology (a brilliant name) steal the master tape and use it in place of the one selected for broadcast.

The reel is full of test films that produce somewhat severe end results, showing how dangerous the tech is, it’s something N.I.B. want kept secret. Having just experienced a demo of the new Apple Vision Pro in my local Belfast store this comic suddenly feels decades ahead of its time. Although I doubt Tim Cook would want people to experience their immersive videos to this degree. So, after the very rich customers set up their Dalek-like devices, our first family settle down to watch a classic sci-fi flick.

After Star Wars, another family find themselves and their couch on thin ice between Bambi and Thumper with predictable results and then a customer experiences an underwater documentary and finds themselves in deep water… and unable to breathe. Our inept detectives’ case has evolved from theft to multiple homicides and as they make their way through the network’s headquarters the two-pig-headed chief of police spots them and calls out in a way that shocked me, with a sudden use of the ‘r’-word.

Okay, so this was written 35 years ago, a time when unfortunately the weight and real meaning of that word could be brushed aside for the sake of a name-calling joke. However, there’s only so much that can be brushed aside with “it was a different time” and yes, attitudes have thankfully changed for the better, but even in the 80s I remember being taught it was an abusive term and never acceptable. Perhaps for some people it was still a joke term separate from the hateful meaning. I’ll just have to believe that and continue with the rest of the issue. I know there’s simply no way it was meant in any other way by John, or by Marvel UK.

As per usual the brothers getting to the bottom of a case is more down to luck than any sort of detective work. Our thief overhears them interviewing Orsum Worlds, mistakenly thinks they’re on his tail and comes to the conclusion that he’ll just have to get rid of them before they do. He simply calls them up and gives them a meeting time and place which is clearly a trap. But it gives El’ Ape a chance to look good in front of Deadbeat in this funny bit above.

Heading to the research lab at midnight they find themselves in the spotlight, quite literally as Baird (our thief) blinds them with a studio light and starts shooting at them. El’ Ape’s pleading on his knees doesn’t help matters and neither does the dim-witted cleaning assistant who thinks they’re filming a cops and robbers film and decides to get comfy in the control booth, accidentally activating the Reel-to-Real system with all three of the others inside it!

Cue a selection of cameos in what I’m assuming are some of John’s favourites, beginning with Indiana Jones and Tom & Jerry. In the former they just about escape getting crushed by the famous boulder before almost dying at the hands of Baird and some local tribespeople. Then the machine (under the weight of the cleaner’s elbows as he leans in to see what will happen next) turns them into cartoons.

Just as Michael Jordan found out in Space Jam in the next decade, being in a cartoon means your body can be contorted into all sorts of shapes without breaking a single bone. After being flattened with a frying pan by a somewhat creepy version of Tom it’s almost curtains for them again until the master tape whirrs into action once more, then they find themselves stuck to a wall in a rather familiar fashion. And in front of some rather familiar eggs.

So we find ourselves back where we began. Normally I’m not a fan of stories that have an exciting opening, like it’s the starting point of an equally exciting story, only for it to go back in time to see how we got to that stage instead. But this is one of those rare occasions where I haven’t minded it and I’ve enjoyed the ride for the most part, eagerly anticipating this moment returning.

So how are they going to get out of this situation? The Aliens movie plays out for longer than the others so it appears our gormless cleaner isn’t going to be of any accidental help this time. But as they duck for cover underneath a floor grill it becomes clear this is going to play out like the conclusion of the film, so I really should’ve been a Sigourney Weaver-shaped cameo coming.

Well, okay, not exactly playing out like the film. I definitely laughed at that. So with Baird reduced to a puddle in real life too the case is officially closed. But what of the technology? That master tape may not have been the one meant for broadcast but it showed how dangerous the system is, and all in the name of profit. The issue ends with a news bulletin wrapping everything up and successfully placing none of the blame on the network, all before the issue comes to an end with a quick commercial break (below).

I do love this ending. It’s deliciously dark after what has been an even funnier issue than last time. The Sleeze Brothers themselves are more part of an ensemble rather than the stars of the show but it works, the balance between comedy, commentary and character perfectly balanced. It shows these six issues have the potential to produce six very different stories and keep everything fresh and funny until the very end.

We’ll see if I’m right on Monday 26th August 2024 when the review for The Sleeze Brothers #3 hits the blog.

iSSUE ONE < > iSSUE THREE

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Comic Reviews, G.I. Joe, Transformers: Generation 2

G.i. JOE #140: A MiND-BENDiNG iSSUE

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This cover drawn by Chris Batista and Donald Hudson suggests the action is picking up inside and it’s not wrong. Goin’ South is, as ever, written by Larry Hama, Chris is on pencil duties, Chip Wallace inks, Bob Sharen colours and I’m guessing Rick Parker is lettering again although there’s no credit for some reason. Megatron presents The Ark to Cobra Commander as per their agreement after Cobra rebuilt the former Decepticon commander’s body, giving him a brand new form and paint job.

The title spread below initially threw me a bit. The trees on the surface of The Ark after it leaves its hiding place seemed far too small compared to Megatron, making the ship seem too big as a result. But think of them as being in the background and Megatron in the foreground, and remember that the biggest Transformers would be about the size of those trees, and the scale of The Ark suddenly seems spot on.

In the final issues of the original comic we saw The Ark crash land after a spectacular fight on board that involved Megatron, his future self Galvatron, Shockwave and Starscream. With Megatron revived in the prose story in the last annual, I really do love how Larry’s story is keeping faithful to what has gone before. It would’ve been easier to just do a soft reset set a few years later that wouldn’t have contradicted the first series, but which needn’t have deliberately linked back to specific moments. So kudos to him for the fan service.

Over the next few pages we check in on most of our human cast, beginning with Doctor Biggles-Jones being mesmerised by what their scanners are picking up from within The Ark. Then we see Scarlet still in a hospital bed (although inside a helicopter) giving an ominous warning to Slice and Dice that Cobra Commander isn’t going to need their Doctor friend anymore once Mindbender is revived properly, who it was revealed last month has been cloned since their leader seemingly tried to kill him.

It reminds me of a particularly good episode of the War of the Worlds TV series of the 80s

Destro, Baroness and master of disguise Zartan paraglide into the old castle fortress of his design where this all kicked off two issues ago, avoiding the troops and security systems on the ground. Inside they easily gain access to the throne room and take over the people stationed there by Zartan pretending to be their commander, before revealing his true identity and taking them prisoner. I always enjoyed Destro’s subterfuge as the outsider to Cobra (he’s basically an independent arms dealer) and reading this issue I’ve realised how much I’ve missed him and the Baroness characters in particular.

Meanwhile, we head to a place called Milleville in Canada (The Ark crash landed near there) and it looks like Larry’s script calls for the Transformers to be able to fly in robot form as they did in the cartoon of the 80s, something the comic (and thankfully the movies too) didn’t subscribe to. The town isn’t actually deserted. Instead, its populace are almost like mindless zombies thanks to a previous visit by Cobra and Dr. Mindbender’s Brainwave Scanner.

It reminds me of a particularly good episode of the War of the Worlds TV series of the 80s in which the aliens took over the bodies of everyone in a small American town, so I’m all in on the idea here. However, one of the people starts coming out of their hypnotised state. The troops try forcing an electrified helmet on him but he breaks it on the ground, electrifying a nearby puddle. In the struggle he knocks over Mindbender’s glass case, which smashes right on said puddle and electrocutes Mindbender’s non-responsive body.

As they knock out the man and prepare to hypnotise him again, Cobra Commander hilariously requests that somebody “mop up Dr. Mindbender and re-pickle him before he starts to turn again”! He always had a way with words. But this moment is interrupted when the de-pickled body speaks! I really like the lettering here, although it does return to normal by the time Mindbender talks again on the next page when he sees Megatron looming overhead.

As Dr. Mindbender tries to catch up on the state of the world in his absence it’s funny to see what the main issues are for this crazed evil genius

Cobra Commander tells him that trying to bury him alive (alongside everyone else he thought was against him) was a mistake and that this cloning is his way of making it up to him. Even Mindbender comments that he has some gall! Interestingly, Megatron queries if DNA cloning for the reanimation of organic material will be included in their trade. I wonder what he has in mind?

Meanwhile, the Joes have located Cobra and are closing in. Snake Eyes, Storm Shadow and the Ninja Force make their way to the town’s hospital to check in on Scarlett and we witness Biggles-Jones telling Scarlett she knows she’s still working for the Joes. Snake draws his blade as he hears this from outside the window but that’s where this particular plot line is left for this month. It’s one I’m particularly interested in seeing develop next time.

I always enjoy Larry’s sense of humour and his natural ability to introduce laugh-out-loud comedy moments in the middle of what are fast moving, action-packed and dramatic plots. Above, the Joes rely on Spirit’s eagle friend for some covert aerial reconnaissance, giving the stoic character a chance to rise a smile with the reader.

But it’s while the Ninja Force surround the hospital that I genuinely laughed. As the Scarlett scene I described above plays out we also see Dr. Mindbender in another room having an ice bath as he recovers from his cloning. As he flicks through the television channels, trying to catch up on the state of the world in his absence, it’s funny to see what the main issues are for this crazed evil genius.

For me, if you’re going to promote a crossover with the Transformers you need to show transformations and, just as the story is about to end, one is squeezed in when Megatron is asked if he can be a bit more discreet in their current setting. After an example of how well the dialogue between these two characters is written, Tunnel Rat pops up from a storm drain and recognises a Cybertronian when he sees one. (Plus Megatron’s face hasn’t changed, just its colour.)

Their secret is out. The Joes now know that the situation is suddenly much more grave than they could possibly have imagined. So to end on we relocate to Mainframe sitting at a computer screen in the middle of a field of telecommunication arrays pointing towards the stars where he’s beaming a message to a designated point in the galaxy. What? It couldn’t be…. could it? As I turn to the final page I find out the answer to that is a resounding ‘yes’.

I’d always assumed Megatron was the only Cybertronian to feature in this crossover set up to Transformers: Generation 2, so to see Optimus Prime and Bumblebee suddenly pop up was a genuine surprise. Will the Joes remodel Prime’s alt mode with giant letters to give away who the truck really is? I doubt it somehow, but if you haven’t already make sure you read the introductory post to see what I’m talking about. This is a great cliffhanger to end on though.

Far less dramatic is a one-page advert for Stridex Maximum Strength spot cream. Given that the target audience for G.I. Joe would also include teenagers it’s an obvious place for an advert for such a product, but they do so in the most cringe-worthy way imaginable with horrible comic strip heroes. And that bottom-left panel looks more like it belongs in some adult magazine! Lew Stringer did a much better job when Pete and his Pimple went up against The Zit-Busters in OiNK a few years earlier.

After the surprise ending to this month’s strip I’m not sure where I got the information that these issues of G.I. Joe only featured Megatron but I’m glad they were wrong. Of course, I don’t know how much involvement the other characters will have and I’ll have to wait to find out (such is the nature of this blog and I love the anticipation, so no spoilers please if you remember this from your own childhood). It’s also been good to see the G.I. Joe comic still going strong 140 issues in (Marvel US’s Transformers made it to #80), although it only had a little over a year left with its original publisher by this point.

This issue has been a blast. It could easily have felt overcrowded with so many subplots going on but Larry handles them all superbly. Each one advances and they’re interlocked so tightly that each one is affecting the rest to varying degrees. This means Transformers fans can rest assured the non-Cybertronian parts of the story are just as entertaining. We’re still a couple of months off from their own comic so join me for #141 of this comic on Sunday 25th August 2024 as we take another step closer.

iSSUE 139 < > iSSUE 141

TRANSFORMERS: GENERATiON 2 MENU

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Aliens, Comic Reviews

ALiENS #2: TiMMY, THEY’VE BEEN GONE A LONG TIME

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From the moment I picked up this sophomore issue of Dark Horse International’s Aliens comic with Paul Johnson‘s (Legends of the Dark Knight, Spinechiller Collection, Janus: Psi-Division) cover I was excited. Not just because this last month has felt like an age and I’ve been looking forward to it, I was excited to see a third strip has been added. Inside it’s explained that there were meant to be three strips last time but an issue with resizing Newt’s Tale for the larger pages of the UK comic delayed it. So here we are with the proper format now of two main Aliens strips and a Predator back up, plus all the extras of course.

One of those extras leaves a nasty taste in the mouth this month (and contradicts the comic itself) and I’ll get to that further along in the review. There’s also the first letters page, the next Technical Readout and the latest Xenomorph news. There’s also exciting Alien³ news which will mean more blog content too. But we’ll start with that new story, written by Mike Richardson and credited as “Based on the screenplay by James Cameron”. This is because it’s a retelling of the movie’s story but from the perspective of a different character, which is rather special.

Anyone who’s seen the Special Edition of Aliens (which is the default version today) should recognise this scene. We’re on LV-426 near Hadley’s Hope and Newt’s prospector dad has struck gold. Sent by the Wayland-Yutani company to a specific spot he’s taken his whole family along for the ride. Finding the massive alien ship from the first movie they think they’ve struck it rich, and the company has given him the rights to whatever he finds! Of course they knew what he’d find, and that he won’t be around long enough to claim anything.

So far, so familiar but this moves beyond a basic movie adaptation pretty quickly as we see Newt and her brother creep into the air ducts of the settlement they call home to find out if their dad is alright, since they haven’t been allowed near him while the doctors fail to get an unknown (to them) creature detached from his face. But in trying to protect them it’s just led to the kids being kids, and now they’re about to be witness to something much more terrifying.

The artwork here is by Jim Somerville (The Walking Dead – not that one, Maelstrom, Warlock 5) on pencils and Brian Garvey (Transformers, Gunfire, The New Gods) on inks with colours by Gregory Wright (Elephantmen, co-creator of the 90’s Deathlok, co-writer of Sensational She-Hulk) and the lettering is by Pat Brosseau (Hellboy, Wonder Woman, Wolverine). It reminds me of Stephen Baskerville’s inking (especially when working with Andrew Wildman) on The Real Ghostbusters and as such it feels a bit too cartoony for the subject, especially for this scene.

But I do love the idea behind it and I’m intrigued to see the rest of a story I know so well played out from a different viewpoint, even if one of this very publication’s feature writers thinks otherwise. I’m getting to that. Up next though is our back up strip. In between the two Aliens tales is Predator: Cold War written by Mark Verheiden, with pencils by Ron Randall, inks by Steve Mitchell, colours by Chris Chalenor and Rachelle Menashe, with letters by Clem Robins. In this chapter we continue getting to know Arnie’s apparent brother, Detective Schaefer as his drugs bust goes wrong.

This takes up pretty much all of the strip’s eight pages, although to be fair to editor Dick Hansom the chunks of story presented were originally meant to be different until that technical fault last month. What we end up with here as a result is a rather clichéd 80s police flick, but it ends with Schaefer being kidnapped by some Men In Black-types for the general and then we head back to Serbia and the rig workers are getting panicked that there’s something out in the snow coming for them. They’re not wrong.

As someone who has only seen the second film many decades ago (I’ve decided I’ll get around to them this Hallowe’en) this comic is basically my introduction to the Predator and so far I’m just getting impatient to find out exactly what we’re dealing with. That’s not the strip’s fault obviously, it’s my own, and I’m sure fans of the original movie would get a kick out of this.

The Aliens Special Edition video had proven to be a huge success for 20th Century

Before we move on to the funnier (no, really) of our strips we’ll take a look at some of the extras. On the news pages it’s Alien³ release season with news on dates and box office numbers, a special mention for the poster design and (alongside a spot of Batman) the Aliens Special Edition video had proven to be a huge success for 20th Century. This particular news item and the inclusion of Newt’s Tale make another page in this comic even more surprising.

Quite a lot of my friends were huge fans of the Alien films and not a single one of them had anything but utter love for James Cameron’s Special Edition of his sequel, happily contributing to the sales figures above. (Then happily buying it again several years later in widescreen, then DVD, BluRay, iTunes 4K… you get the idea.) At the time of writing this review Disney’s new Star Wars series The Acolyte has proven very successful but there are some dark corners of the internet that I’ve heard are attacking it and this page reminds me of that to some degree.

This page of the comic reads like one of those Threads posts bulked up to a full article

Of course, a lot of the hate for the Star Wars show is because of ‘reasons’ from some very horrible types that we won’t get into here, but some others are just complaining because it’s adding to the lore. Surely that’s a good thing? It reminds me of when Doctor Who had mystery injected back into the character with The Timeless Child (when we found out they’d led many more lives than we’d thought, which even brought a lot of classic episodes/scenes back into canon). Some fans online don’t like not knowing everything about whatever they’re a fan of, and will instead say something “isn’t canon” and is an example of “bad writing” instead.

This page of the comic reads like one of those Threads posts bulked up to a full article. It also doesn’t sit well within a comic that has a strip (Newt’s Tale) that takes scenes from that very same Special Edition to explain more of a character’s backstory, the exact scenes that are being complained about here. If I’m not mistaken, while buying these comics for the blog I’m sure I noticed a future cover promoting a competition to win this video! This really is rather strange and not what I would expect from an otherwise quality comic. So let’s get back to the good stuff with part two of Aliens: Hive.

Regular readers of the blog may be familiar with how the Jurassic Park comic’s editorial recaps of previous chapters were described as ‘What Has Gone Before’ and here we get a full page of this for each strip, using cover images from the original US comics. I really like these. It’s like they’re announcing the next strip’s arrival as I read through the issue. As the crew leave the Dolomite for the surface we see Norbert has been able to keep its name after all and this produces some of the lighter and, surprisingly, funny moments. At least until we meet Gill, a synthetic human the likes of which is synonymous with the Alien films.

Always drawn with shadows covering his face, Gill is suitably creepy. As they move towards the 1000-meter high alien nest on the surface, the main ship has been scanning the debris encircling the planet and they’ve detected the remains of a ship, so of course they send a couple of people to recover the black box. Shockingly, they make it back safely. The recording shows the captain warning another ship of criminal trespass before the tape just stops. The Dolomite commander contacts Gill to tell him said criminals could still be about so to watch out, but instructs him not to tell the crew, not even the expedition leaders. This back-stabbing between humans who all have their own agendas fits perfectly into the Alien universe; human greed is basically the cause of all the horrific events in the movies. 

Down on the planet we get to see their landing disturb one of the sleeping residents. As you can see this is a very stylised version of the alien, its head isn’t one long smooth curve for example. I do like this style of art though by Kelley Jones (with colours by Les Dorschield and letters by Clem Robins), and in the years since we’ve seen how the alien species can adapt to whatever living being its transplanted into by its facehugger (beginning in Alien³) so we can always describe it away.

I’m eagerly anticipating the gruesome moments (if last month is anything to go by) and action-packed scenes we’ll see drawn in this very particular way in the following chapters. It’s very 90s, isn’t it? I love it. The strip ends with Doctor Mayakovsky in another alien slime-induced trance while Julian Lish looks on and thinks about the two of them together. It appears, contrary to the impression given last month, that they’re very much in love. Or is one using the other? More intrigue.

There’s another Technical Readout and this time it goes into a lot of detail about the drop ship we saw in the film before the issue rounds off with the first letters page, Bug Hunt. It might seem very quick to have this in the second issue but that’s because the last comic of volume one (all of which we’ll get around to eventually, I promise) saw Dark Horse come in and shake the comic up before their full relaunch. There’s the explanation about Newt’s Tale, a brief description of how setting up their UK office has opened the doors to talent in this part of the world working on their American comics, and there are hints about future Dark Horse International titles.

One isn’t just a hint though, backed up as it is with a back page advert.

While I’m not usually a fan of comics adaptations I’m looking forward to this regardless, especially the extra features. Just like Jurassic Park’s first few issues this had a three-weekly release schedule so of course that’ll be the case on the blog too. I’ll talk more about the movie itself during those issue, however I’ll just say that those friends of mine I mentioned above weren’t that crash hot about it on its initial release but I always enjoyed it.

However, the Collector’s Edition released since then has turned even them into die-hard Alien³ fans and in my eyes it puts the film on a level peg with the first two! So it’ll be interesting to see what the adaptation includes and you can come along and find out from Monday 5th August 2024 when Alien³ #1 hits the blog. Then it’s not a long wait at all until Aliens #3 (this could get confusing) arrives on Tuesday 20th August. See you then.

ALiENS iSSUE 1 < > ALiEN³ iSSUE 1

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New OiNK Material, OiNK Comic Reviews, OiNK Contributors

PSYCHO GRAN COMIC CAPERS CAVALCADE #3: REVENGE iS A SWEET OLD LADY

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Before you go and search through the blog to find reviews of the first two issues of David Leach’s Psycho Gran Comic Capers Cavalcade I’ll tell you know you won’t find them. Yet. This blog was relaunched in 2021 and the previous two editions were released before that. Psycho’s earlier Cavalcades will eventually get included but for now I’m concentrating on the brand new issue that David has released through Dead Universe Publishing. Featuring a selection of strips originally released digitally in Aces Weekly this is their more natural home, on the printed page. And what lovely printed pages they are; 36 high grade glossy A4 pages and a thin card cover, really bringing David’s gorgeous colours to life.

Presented in “Widescreen Psycho Vision” the original landscape format for the digital comic means the reader has to turn this on its side, making the pages feel much larger when held, almost like a Psycho Gran broadsheet! It adds to the appeal and uniqueness of the comic and feels like a natural fit for what David has produced for us.

There’s a bit of a theme with some of the stories (all multi-page affairs apart from the front cover) as we meet some of her friends from the Netherworld who make up her book club. This seems appropriate given how it’s been emphasised before how old she must be and yet she just keeps on going. Speaking of her innate ability to give a middle finger to the Grim Reaper she goes up against what is surely her biggest foe to date: Covid.

As an obvious fan of the character from right back when she first appeared in OiNK #15 (my second issue as a kid so she was there from the beginning for me) is it just me or for a split second do you almost feel sorry for the virus here? Just for a second though. I won’t give anything away but you know she’ll come out on top of this fight. It’s how she manages it that makes us laugh. You’ll just have to buy the comic to find out for yourself. This strip is worth the entry fee alone.

Among the remaining stories we see her visit the grave of her deceased husband in what starts out as a surprisingly touching strip that slowly begins to wander back into familiar territory, bringing with it an ever-broadening smile from the reader. Her book club then returns in the largest strip of the issue with some imagery which definitely wouldn’t have made it into the pages of the kid-friendly OiNK!

This particular story also involves a trademark of Psycho Gran as she takes revenge out on those in the world that really deserve it, like in previous issues where she went up against pavement jumping cyclists or footpath hogging joggers. There’s a feeling these are being ticked off David’s own personal hit list of pet peeves and they’re always the funniest of all the strips.

Those who con little old ladies out of their money, polite queue jumpers in supermarkets and show-off swimmers in the local pool should all watch out from now on. Then, just as you think the comic couldn’t possibly surprise us any more it brings a brand new look to the character with a cheery, saccharine reboot as ‘Psycho Granny‘ in the style of old school traditional British humour comics, the type that OiNK itself was created in response to.

As it is this is already a funny take on the whole premise, never mind the ending which I won’t spoil for you, although I’ll just say it’s another reason for pig pals to get their trotters on this comic. So how do you do so? Aylesburty comic shop Dead Universe Comics have published the Psycho Gran Comic Capers Cavalcade series for David and if you’re not in the area you can order from them by giving them a bell on 07852 836307.

At £4.99 this is a bargain for all OiNK fans and fans of highly original, genuinely very funny comics in general. On the inside back cover is a comics checklist of sorts, of all of David’s physical releases to date. Psycho Gran Comic Capers Cavalcade #3 is the perfect starting point for anyone wanting to get into the modern publications from anyone in the OiNK team and an absolutely essential purchase for dedicated pig pals.

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Comic Reviews, Death's Head

DEATH’S HEAD #9: HEAD WiTH A HEART

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With a cover by none other than the legendary Walt Simonson (Thor, Star Slammers, Jurassic Park) and Mark Farmer, the penultimate issue of Death’s Head contains no official warning that the comic was about to come to an end. There’s a bit of a hint on the editorial page which has a ’Next Issue’ panel in place of the usual subscriptions offers, not that readers at the time would’ve picked up on this as they’d have been too excited at the prospect of our Freelance Peace-Keeping Agent meeting Iron Man next month.

After a price rise last issue we got another one this month too, by 5p again. I remember the second half of 1988 and into 1989 my comics always seemed to be increasing in price, such were the struggles of an industry at a time when readerships were declining in the face of competition from television and computer games while production costs were soaring. Death’s Head would become a casualty of these changes soon enough but let’s enjoy the issue at hand first.

The editorial describes how last month The Doctor dropped off Death’s Head in the middle of Earth’s Dark Ages, which is actually 1989. Given writer Simon Furman‘s Dragon’s Claws took regular swipes at the 80s UK government (in the comic’s future vision of Britain) this could be more about accuracy than a quick joke. Simon is back after a month away from the comic and co-creator Geoff Senior finally makes a very welcome return as artist.

I didn’t even know the big rock guy
is the leader!

As you can see The Fantastic Four are the special guests this month. I’ll admit this is the first comic featuring them that I’ve ever read. I’ve never seen an issue of theirs and never saw the cartoons as a kid or any of the movies, so I really am going into this blind. I didn’t even know the big rock guy is the leader! It starts off very light-hearted with The Thing and The Human Torch bickering in a very superhero way.

Clobberin’ Time continues new editor Steve White’s brief time behind the wheel, with regulars Louise Cassell and Annie Halfacree on colours and letters respectively. That title soon becomes tiresome though. I understand it’s The Thing’s catchphrase but he uses it so frequently I feel like shouting, “Okay, okay, I get it, kids are meant to be copying him!” at the pages. Perhaps this is keeping within character but it’s just so annoying. What is good is the funny moment this sequence ends with, where it looks like they’ve made up.

Meanwhile, up on the roof someone isn’t too happy at being dropped off in the wrong time again, much like how he ended up in 8162 in the first place, even if he did settle in there and made it his (lucrative) home. However, not only is he out of time he’s also in precisely the wrong place as The Fantastic Four’s security system automatically opens fire. I have to say for the good guys their security system is very much shoot-first-and-ask-questions-later. Although it does lead to a laugh or two thanks to Death’s Head quips and his long-running bad luck.

Their building is a bit naff though, as huge holes are blasted open and its roof is destroyed as the automated weapons try and fail to take down Death’s Head. You’d think their HQ’s walls would be a bit more secure, that they’d stand up to their own security. But it’s all a bit of daft fun so we’ll not get caught up in the details (this isn’t Twitter). Using his rocket boots to fly through one of the aforementioned roof holes he finds himself in what could be described as their garage, full of hi-tech gadgets and transport.

Convinced this level of tech on 1980s Earth could mean they’d have access to a time machine, Death’s Head thinks aloud, “Just hope they’re nice, sane, normal people…” when he gets a rock hard tap on the shoulder. Meanwhile, back in the Los Angeles of 8162 Spratt is still fighting with their pet vulture (see #5) and takes another phone call from the mysterious woman in previous issues who’s been proclaiming she’s his business partner’s love. This time we also see part of her attire.

I’m still none the wiser although I’m assuming she must be a known character, given how she’s slowly being introduced. The Evil Dead’s Death Nell? If you remember the identity of the caller please don’t tell me in a comment or on socials; no spoilers! Hopefully I’ll find out in our final issue. As for this special crossover event it boils down to The Fantastic Four’s not-so-fantastic security program going rogue and dispatching a hovering droid to see off everyone.

At the beginning of the issue Reed Richards is working on one of the computer chips powering it and he was interrupted by the infighting, inadvertently making a mistake and corrupting the programming. At least this is the suggestion that’s thrown out by Reed, it’s never actually confirmed. With their bickering and the over-zealous zapping at Death’s Head having destroyed a lot of the building, it goes into full defensive mode.

During a protracted fight between the team and their new visitor it becomes clear that Death’s Head’s supposed fighting back is a case of mistaken identity. It was actually the computer attacking them but they were too busy assuming it was Death’s Head that they didn’t see the obvious. Between these reactions and the way their system was programmed I don’t have much faith in this superhero if my first impressions are anything to go by.

Eventually they calm down and think rationally, realising they need to team up with this comic’s lead character when Reed and The Invisible Woman’s child is put in danger. With Death’s Head being a mechanoid and able to hack the system that’s trying to kill them, soon it comes down to our ruthless hunter of bounties (I didn’t say it), a paid assassin, a mech programmed for self-preservation, to rescue a child.

The droid has handcuffed itself to the young boy in his bedroom, coldly using him as a bargaining chip. Now, our anti-hero isn’t exactly known for being subtle. Clicking a laser cutter onto his arm to snap the connection to the boy he leaps into the room and actually ends up damaging the droid and setting off its self-destruct! For a brief moment we see the Death’s Head we’d expect to see if this were any adult human, but it appears there’s a glimmer of a soul behind the facade.

That third image says it all and with the constant countdown you can feel the palpable sense of desperation in that penultimate panel. Superb, exciting stuff that Geoff’s penmanship is just perfect for. This may be the printed page but somehow he’s always able to make his art feel so animated when the script calls for it. After the umpteen pages of fighting earlier in the comic, after the build up in the story prior to this, this is single-handedly the most dramatic and exciting moment.

The panic it sets off is key to what’s next,
the story for our final issue

Yes, Death’s Head had to save the kid in order to gain access to their time machine but you can tell that’s not the reason he put his own life at risk. Ultimately though, this brave and heroic moment earns him the trust of The Fantastic Four and they set up their machine to take him back to 8162, a device that transports him in a green bar of energy from the feet up.

As he disappears, The Thing tells him that he had him all wrong, that the mech must be “what passes as a superhero in 8162”, to which Death’s Head tells him no, he was right all along. He then finally introduces himself by name and tells them what he does for a living…

This was a suitably funny final line for the character and the panic it sets off is key to what’s next, the story for our final issue. Back in the earlier days of reading Marvel UK’s Transformers for the blog’s Instagram the Machine Man of 2020 back up strip introduced a future-version of a certain main character in the publisher’s lineup. The hero’s identity had been completely taken over by another person. In the year 2020 Iron Man was no longer Tony Stark, he was Arno Stark.

No longer a hero, the Iron Man of 2020 was a mercenary-for-hire (which should make things interesting next month) and after being defeated by Machine Man he reappeared in a Spider-Man comic (also published in Transformers) when his family were held hostage by a killer and he had to travel back in time for the story’s resolution. The story ended in disaster, with Arno losing and seeing his city of the then-far future destroyed. His next appearance after that was in #10 of Death’s Head.

I knew Iron Man was to be the special guest star in the final issue but I had no idea it was this version and I’m super excited to see what happens. I really loved his two stories in Transformers. He was clearly the bad guy in his first appearance and for all intents and purposes was exactly the same when he returned. He was forced into a position of doing the right thing but in doing so went up against an actual hero, so young readers’ loyalties were tested. It made for fascinating reading.

I’m hoping for more of that kind of storytelling in Death’s Head next month. The pieces are certainly in place for an explosive finale and a suitably powerful send off for what has been a brilliant comic series. If it’s as good as it has been so far, and as good as those Iron Man of 2020 appearances were, then it’ll certainly take the edge off having to say goodbye. The final contract is on Monday 5th August 2024, right here.

iSSUE EiGHT < > iSSUE TEN

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Comic Reviews, G.I. Joe, Transformers: Generation 2

G.i. JOE #139: TANKS FOR THE MEMORiES

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With this issue of G.I. Joe (or, to give it its full title, G.I. Joe starring Snake Eyes and Transformers: Generation 2 – phew!) we start down the path to the new Transformers series proper. There may only be one Cybertronian in the tale but it’s Megatron, so you know he’ll be centre stage. The cover by Chris Batista (Steel, 52, Robin) and Chip Wallace (The Legion, Justice League Task Force, Star Wars: X-Wing Rogue Squadron) sets the tone perfectly and throws a hint for both the plot and Megatron’s new body as Transformers fans wouldn’t have missed the fact he’s rather green and blue. More on that below.

As always with G.I. Joe the story is written by the legendary Larry Hama although this issue the art team are completely different. While pencils are by Chris, you’d swear it was another Andrew Wildman/Stephen Baskerville masterpiece but that could be because Stephen’s inking work is so identifiable. There are no less than three other inkers alongside him this month! They are Chip, Keith Williams (Alpha Flight, Action Comics, Sensational She-Hulk) and Donald Hudson (Punisher Kills the Marvel Universe, Forever Amber, Wolverine). Rick Parker and Bob Sharen return for letters and colours respectively, with Bob joined by Jurassic Park story editor Renée Witterstaetter (Silver Surfer, Jason Vs. Leatherface, Savage Sword of Conan). That’s a lot of people. So what are the results of their collective skills?

Personally, I think this opening spread is just incredible! Megatron’s savagery is spot on, and the pages may be a good bit smaller than those that UK Transformers fans were used to but the sense of scale is magnificent. He truly comes across as a terrifying entity. In their own comic it was easy to forget their size because in its later life it all but forgot about human characters (or being in disguise). Facing up against Cobra the might of Megatron feels palpable. I love the little details too in his openly damaged body, in the firepower hitting him and the cracks throughout his frame.

Scarlett is in bad shape after being stabbed by her love Snake Eyes last time, and despite what they saw Slice is still suspicious of her motives. The story kicks off with Cobra Commander making a run for it, aghast that Megatron would open fire when Cobra was just trying to make a deal with him. But as Zarana points out, what could a robot want? “It’s the currency we’re talking about, not the amount!”, realises Cobra Commander. Intriguing.

I just love big transformation pages and this is right up there with some of the best we ever saw in the Transformers comic. Megatron’s voice patterns are somewhat different than normal but it isn’t so drastically different as to take away from anything. He always did love the gravitas of his own voice. Him and the human leader here have that in common at least.

Doctor Biggles-Jones reckons her specially crafted Hyper-Velocity Rail Gun could go up against “that folding robot” (love that, it’s so close to swearing), noting that just because Megatron is alien tech doesn’t necessarily mean he is better tech. She grabs a H.I.S.S. Tank with the gun attached and let’s rip on the Decepticon leader. It hits him but goes straight through with such velocity that it continues travelling until it’s outside of Earth’s atmosphere!

The action is great so far. It does calm down after this to focus more on the negotiations between Cobra Commander and Megatron, which are just as entertaining to read, but the first handful of pages are quite breathtaking in their relentlessness. The only thing that’s ever so annoying is the American comic’s insistence to shove adverts on to nearly every-other page, interrupting the flow somewhat.

Convinced the technology is of alien original, Megatron goes in for a closer look, grabs the doctor and squeezes her. It looks like she’s about to die when a voice calls out. Pausing momentarily to listen to Cobra Commander, Megatron is told that the “fleshling” he now holds is the designer of the very-human weapon that damaged him. Instantly, Megatron changes his tune about negotiating. 

Acknowledging that these particular humans could actually have the ability to repair and upgrade his damaged body, a deal is struck. There’s a palpable sense of foreboding to this collaboration, one we know won’t be of mutual trust. As the issue goes on, both leaders’ inner thoughts betray their intentions to the reader while their outer speech is cleverly worded to twist those thoughts for the benefit of their partner-in-crime. Larry Hama is just superb at writing this pairing.

Meanwhile, up in the air in their C-130 the Joes, Destro and the Baroness are making their way home. Snake Eyes and Destro are two of my favourite characters (alongside Scarlett and Stalker, also featured in this crossover) so to see them together in Scarlett’s undercover and Destro’s defection storylines is a joy. I just wish I had more issues to enjoy this to the full. (Thankfully that’ll soon be rectified.)

While this storyline continues we pop in on Cobra Commander and Megatron to see how their deal is shaping up, in an image that brings back memories of the first live-action Transformers movie with Megatron surrounded by scaffolding (albeit not in cryostasis this time). I knew going in that Cobra was responsible for rebuilding him (while the Joes were responsible for killing Bumblebee in the American continuity – in ours it was Death’s Head) but I was worried about how that would be depicted. I shouldn’t have been concerned.

Zarana’s vapour-inducing thought on the next page is that they should keep on dismantling Megatron so they can change the deal completely in their favour, however Cobra Commander shuts down the idea, at least until they get their hands on the goodies aboard The Ark. Unbeknownst to them (although surely you would assume) Megatron is listening in and simply smirks to himself.

Doctor Biggles-Jones is a character I’d never seen before until reading the previous issue, so I’ve no idea how long she’s been in the comic or anything about her background. She’s a technical wizard to put it very mildly, responsible for the most destructive of Cobra’s weaponry, and now the rail gun that damaged the giant Cybertronian is going to be installed in him, replacing his previous arm cannon. Things are building nicely towards Generation 2.

Biggles-Jones heads off to stop Slice from killing Scarlett after it’s confirmed the stabbing by Snake Eyes wasn’t accidentally non-fatal, it had been done with precision. Meanwhile, Destro and the Baroness have been taken back to Cobra Island by the Joes which at some point has been abandoned. Again, this is something I’ve missed between the time the stories appeared in Marvel UK’s Transformers and this. They’re rather shocked to find Cobra Commander waiting for them! Until, that is, he starts to glow and change…

… into Zartan, the master of disguise. His “new image” is clearly a reference to a new toy model Hasbro had created for him, and it’s clever of Larry to write in a quick panel or two to show readers (particularly this one who wasn’t aware of the change) his original look. All reacquainted now, Hawk explains why they’ve all been brought here.

On one side of the island is a cave that’s permanently on fire. Apparently when they left the island Cobra had drilled down to an oil deposit and lit it. Zartan mourns the loss of life, the bodies inside unrecoverable ash. That is, unrecoverable without Dr. Mindbender’s Brainwave Scanner and cloning vat, the former being an infamous device in the comic’s lore used to torture more than a few Joes. His cloning vat is missing, which had been used to create Serpentor from the remains of the greatest military leaders in history and resurrect Storm Shadow, both stories I remember fondly from Transformers.

There’s a funny moment here when Destro laments the fact Mindbender’s warped genius wasn’t used to resurrect Newton, Da Vinci or Einstein, while the Baroness would have preferred Elvis! There’s a passing mention of Mindbender having died but his body could’ve been moved along with a computer program able to resurrect the man himself. Having read IDW’s continuation of the story decades later in which Mindbender turns himself into a mad, mobile, weaponised computer system (yes, really) I’m assuming this is the start of bringing that character back into the comic.

To finish off this month’s chapter we return to the headline event for Transformers fans as a door slides open at Cobra’s current base and a huge green and purple tank rolls out. It makes light work of three H.I.S.S. tanks; we see its artillery slice through them like butter and continue out the other sides of them. This means it’s equipped with the rail gun, which means this is the new alt mode for Megatron! In case there was any doubt the tank shifts and changes on the next page to reveal his new body.

I have to say I really like the new look! It suits him. Cobra Commander gets a rude awakening as he realises Megatron could hear what they were saying all along. Yes, they’d only been praising the doctor on her great work a distance away from the test, but it means Megatron heard everything earlier too. How will this affect their deal or their mutual distrust of each other? We’ll find out soon I’m sure.

After he gives a quick run down of his stats the story ends with Megatron telling them his sensor arrays have located an experiment in the basement of the castle. Cobra Commander tries to dismiss it but Megatron warns him it’s started breathing… and we see Dr. Mindbender suspended in liquid with electrodes attached to his naked body. I knew it. Just to finish off, we’ll take a look at the back page advert which once again places the comic in the timeline of my life.

I remember all the fuss over Mortal Kombat at the time but I’d never been a fan of one-on-one beat-‘em-up games (I’m still not) and when a friend rented out a copy for his Mega Drive from the local video store we were both left feeling rather “meh” about it. That didn’t stop shows like GamesMaster and Bad Influence wetting themselves on an almost weekly basis over it though, or the British press making a whole overblown hoo-ha over its unconvincing digitised gore.

Not only have I enjoyed the Transformers aspects of this issue, it’s been a blast to read new (for me) adventures of the Joes and Cobra. Recently on the blog I’ve written about Skybound Entertainment’s Kickstarter in which they’ll be collecting the whole of Marvel’s run in a gorgeous hardback collection. These two issues so far have really whetted my appetite for that collection to arrive next year. For now though, I’ll look forward to the next part of this particular story in #140 of G.I. Joe, which you’ll see reviewed here on Sunday 28th July 2024.

iSSUE 138 < > iSSUE 140

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